If Sexy Had Stayed

Five Conversations that Never Got a Chance to Happen

Sexy

"Hello. I'm—"

"Captain Jack Harkness, yes, I know, we've met. Hello. I'm Sexy."

beat

"Yes."

Doctor runs into room

"Stop that!"

Fez

"But I like the fez!"

"No."

pause

"Please?"

"No."

longer pause

"No, I said no, not even the cowboy hat!" (every so slightly before)

"Well what if—oh, fine.

Pretty

"But why Rory?"

"Why Amy?"

"Well. she has those legs."

"You think she's pretty for her legs?"

"No! But I understand it's an advantageous feature in human females."

"You just like her because she's, what's the word, orangy, ginger."

silence

"But why Rory?"

"He has a nice nose."

Advice

"When you take her to Asgard, don't forget the duct tape."

"What?"

Kissing

"Can I ask you a question?"

"You just did."

"Yes, well, another after this one?"

"You will."

"Only it's a bit odd."

"Yes."

"And I'm not really used to this sort of thing."

"Yes."

"I'm better at sonicing."

"I know."

"It's about what you said before."

"Yes?"

"And I thought maybe we could, um, test it."

"It?"

"Back on House, before it stole the box, you said you had a new idea."

"Yes?"

"About, uh, about..."

"Yes?"

"About, er, kissing?"

breathes "Yes." pulls him close, 11's Theme starts playing, and your mind drops abruptly into a very happy gutter

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A/N: If you have ideas of your own, please feel free to write them in reviews. Actual dialogue or just ideas of topics, give me enough and I may add another chapter. Sexy has
to be part of the conversation, but the other person(s) do(es)n't matter.