Twin Terrors
by K. Stonham
first released 16th September 2007

In all human social strata, there are certain rites, varying greatly from nation to nation and culture to culture, that are expected to be fulfilled. They are, at their root, an affirmation of unity with one's class, one's culture, one's people. Examples of these rites might include a first communion, a sweet sixteen party, or a bar crawl the night one becomes of legal drinking age. Another example might be that of one's first car. A sacred, almost mythical symbol of freedom to a teenager who did not yet possess one, nothing was more desirable.

Except, maybe, the perfect girl to drive around in one's newly acquired classic Camaro.

But we digress.

In certain places in the nation of Japan, as across the nation of America, a similar rite of passage was generally held to be true. Among the attendees of a certain prestigious educational campus known as "Ouran," it was generally expected that upon one's eighteenth birthday one's parents would give as a gift a suitable mode of transportation. What that mode of transportation was, of course, depended entirely upon one's own tastes, habits, and relationship with whoever controlled the purse strings in one's family.

There were variations in the theme, of course. On the eighteenth birthday of one Morinozuka Takahashi, he had been given a stable of fine horses, sired by prize-winners of several different breeds, and the normally stoic young man had sported for a long time what the careful observer might almost be able to label a smile. His cousin, Haninozuka Mitsukuni, on the other hand, had been given an AS 350 Ecureuil helicopter, broadening his usual grin to near-manic proportions for an entire week while he got used to his new toy. In a more traditional mien, their good friend Ootori Kyouya, vice-president of the Host Club all three were members of, received a satiny black Bentley Continental Flying Spur together with a chauffeur of his own choosing, while the club's president, Tamaki Suoh, went into raptures when he was given an Aston Martin V8 Vantage Roadster in robin's egg blue, the exact shade of his beloved mother's eyes. Their club's most practical (and poorest) member had blinked at the tradition, then simply shrugged, remarking that she didn't see what was wrong with public transportation. Haruhi's eighteenth birthday present from her father had been a set of novels she'd been wanting to read, and a pretty dress.

The club had been shocked, horrified, railed against the suffering that poor people must have to endure, then finally agreed that they liked Haruhi in the dress and it was the prettiest thing ever.

As the eighteenth birthday of the club's two youngest members, the brothers Hitachiin Hikaru and Kaoru, began to approach, they very carefully started slipping hints into conversations with their parents and grandmother as to what they would really, really like for a present. Something that went fast, they'd long since decided. They didn't want to be solid and respectable ("stodgy") like Kyouya-sempai. They wanted something more sporty and eye-catching like Tono's car. Something with a solid roof, though, they decided. Something sleek and fast, dangerous and sexy, eye-catching even among their set. Others could settle for blending in, if they wanted; the twins wanted to stand out.

Saleen S7s, Koenigsegg CCXs, Porsche Carrera GT-4s, Ferrari Enzo Ferraris, Bugatti Veyrons, Lamborghini Murcielagos, and even SSC Ultimate Aero TTs were researched and discussed as possibilities. Whatever model it was, they knew, they wanted two: one for each of them. After all, where would the fun in things be if everyone could tell them apart by what car they drove?

Their mother and grandmother took the twins' subtle hinting calmly, not reacting in any way that would let Hikaru or Kaoru know they'd just found out in advance what their present was going to be. Their father, however, took interest in their research and got into long discussions with them regarding car specs and models. Given that they were both rather fond of their father's Jaguar XK with its gunmetal gray finish, thinking it a sweet machine, and had been allowed to learn to drive using it, they had a high amount of respect (which would have been astounding to their teachers and classmates) for his opinions in the matter. But in the end his half-smiles were just as inscrutable as those of the rest of their family, leaving Hikaru and Kaoru frustrated and chomping at the bit to find out what they were getting.

June sixth dawned bright and fair and (in the brothers' minds) none too soon. For once bounding out of their beds and dressing quickly, before the maids could even rap politely on the door of their bedroom to wake them, they practically raced one another to the dining room, laughing at each other as they almost hit the walls taking corners. After a polite, sedate breakfast during which they were sure their parents and grandmother were deliberately eating slow, making unnecessary small chat, and generally dragging things out just to torment them, their mother turned and smiled at them. "Well, since it is your birthday," she said, "I suppose you may be excused from the table early."

They waited for it.

"Now, dear," their father chided, smiling at his wife, "don't tease. It is their birthday."

"Oh, did we forget to get them presents this year?" their grandmother worried.

"Grandma!" the twins burst out as one.

All three of their family members laughed.

"The front drive," their mother told them.

"'Scuse us," the twins blurted, and took off running again. More laughter trailed after them.

Bursting out the front door of the mansion, the red-haired golden-eyed twins skidded to a halt. Facing them on the drive, neatly parked at right angles to one another, were a pair of Lamborghini Reventons, gleaming in the daylight. One was as gold as the sun, the other as red as blood.

"Holy..." Hikaru said.

"Wow," Kaoru breathed.

As one they reverently approached the immaculate vehicles. Fingertips glided almost hesitantly over satiny paint finishes, caressing the futuristic styling. They tugged the door handles open, Hikaru slipping into the driver's seat of the red car, Kaoru into the yellow one. The seats were perfectly positioned to their height, the buttery leather fitting against their bodies like gloves. Identical eyes wandered wonderingly across the LCD displays, surprisingly gentle hands settling on the grips of the steering wheels.

Absorbed and enchanted, they didn't even notice their parents and grandmother smiling satisfiedly at them from the veranda.

And no one noticed for a long time that the crest scattered across both vehicles-on their hoods, on their tires, on the center of the steering wheel-was subtly changed. In place of the golden Lamborghini bull was instead a golden symbol, lines and angles and planes that converged to form what looked like a face.

An alien one.

Author's Note: This fic was due largely to fallentaiyoko on LiveJournal posting images of the brand-new, extremely drool-worthy Lamborghini Reventon redone in Sunstreaker and Sideswipe's colors. Hunny's helicopter was a nod to rally driver Colin McRae, who died in a crash the weekend I first posted this.