Playing Tricks
By Icka! M. Chif

"You're in the Kaito Kid Fanclub?" Aoko looked at Sonoko with surprise.

Sonoko beamed with pride. "Yup!"

Aoko sniffed distainfully. Kuroba was gone home sick for the day and the 3 girls plus Conan were wandering around Shibuya. In reality, Conan knew that Kuroba was actually either in, or making his way to, Osaka for a heist tonight by the Kaito Kid.

Which left the pint-sized detective little to enterain himself with aside from the chatter of the 3 girls.

Joy.

"I dislike the Kaito Kid. He's nothing but a two bit thief." Aoko said loftily.

Conan's ears perked up.

"Maybe, but he's so cute!" Sonoko sighed dramatically. Ran hid a giggle at her friends theatrics.

"I think he's gay."

"What?!" Conan tripped, falling on his butt in surprise. The three girls turned to look at him.

Kuroba was many things. Crossdresser, theif, prankster, yes. Gay? No.

For one thing, he liked Aoko a bit too much for that possiblity.

"Are you alright, Conan-kun?" Ran asked, giving him a hand up.

"Un. I'm fine..." He stammered. "I just remembered something I need to do. I'll be right back!"

Ran gave him a nod and a wave as he dashed off, the girls dicussing the possiblity of the Kaito Kid actually being female.

****

"Hei-chan! Telephone!" His mother called.

Hattori rose from the papers he was studing. "Coming."

His mother handed the phone to him, the recevier covered. "It's Kudo-san."

"Thanks." He took the phone from her and watched as she walked off before talking.

"Hey, Kudo. May be you can answer my question." Hattori said with out pre-amble as he took the phone. "Do you know why the heck the Kid stole a Baseball?"

"A Baseball?" The first part of the word started out in Kudo's voice, but ended in Conan's higher, but no less puzzled voice as the voice changer was pulled away.

"Yeah. I've been going thru his records. He's stolen a grand total of 152 jewels, a few paintings and a baseball."

"Not a clue. Why are you going thru his records? I'm sure he'd be more than willing to tell you if you asked."

"He would." Hattori agreed. That was one side effect of their agreement that Hattori hadn't anticpated, yet enjoyed emmensly. The 3 of them could share stories of the various adventures with an audiance that not only -understood-, but had often times had similar experiances. It was a refreshing change from having to keep quiet about things because people thought you were lieing or exaguratting. "But it helps to have a cover incase anyone asks why I may know things about the Kid."

"True." Kudo agreed.

"So why the call, Kudo?"

"Hmm? Oh! I heard something from the girls I thought you might like. Especially with your chase tonight."

"Which is?"

"Aoko-chan thinks the Kaito Kid is gay."

Kazuha, who had just stopped by to check up on his progress and Heiji's mother were treated to the rare sight of Hattori doubled up in laughter when they walked by the phone a few minutes later.


***

There was just something amusing about listening to a bunch of people speculate about something that they knew absolutely nothing about, Hattori mused. Especially when it was a bunch of police officers theorizing about the Kaito Kid, and you happend to know the truth.

He thought that the one about the Kid actually being an alien from another planet was highly entertaining. Almost as good as the theory that the Kid wasn't acutally wearing a hat, but a pair of underwear on his head that granted superpowers.

Some people just had way too much time on their hands.

"It's almost time!" Inspector Nakamori shouted, catching everyone's attention. "Everyone to your posts. And remember, this is a matter of pride! We won't let this no-good thief get away with makeing fools of the Police!"

The teenage detective turned away, scanning the area. He had a bit of a headstart over the police by knowing what the Kid actually looked like, and there was nothing in the rules of their game that said he couldn't use that.

To his surprise, he found himself enjoying this too. The Kaito Kid had been in Osaka a few times before, and each time had caused a great deal of frustration. This time however, it was just as they had named it. A Game.

One he didn't intend to loose, of course.

"There he is! We've spotted him!" A cry went up. Everyone looked up to see a small white blimp carrying a figure pass over head and dissappear over the building. Both police men and helicopters scrambled towards it.

The Osaka detective frowned. That didn't seem quite right. He looked around, noticing the 'officer' who had started the cry. He was heading the oppisite way of the rest of the police men, a famliar smirk on his face. One that he had seen over a couple of times, over a deck of cards.

He smirked as well, following the Kid into the building. The chase had begun.

***

And what a chase it was. The Kid got a hold of the jewel with almost insulting ease, then took to the rooftops for a simple get away. Hattori and a few of the smarter officers chased him on the streets, but the Kid's lead increased rapidly.

Until Heiji paused, taking a deep breath as he prepared his secret weapon.

"Oi, KID!" Hattori shouted at the retreated figure, a huge grin threatening to split his face. "I hear your girlfriend thinks you're gay!"

The Kid stumbled and fell off the rooftop in surprise. He recovered and made a near-graceful landing.

But what brought everything to a halt was that the Kid then turned and started making several insulting gestures that could easily be seen and clearly interupreted back at him.

Hattori laughed and took advantage of the stall to start running towards the angry thief. "Well? What are you waiting for?" He shot over his shoulder. "He stopped!"

The befuddled officers shrugged and sped to catch up.

The Kid realised what Hattori had done just in time for them to de-crease his lead by a significate amount. Instead of taking back to the rooftops as expected, the theif suddenly charged towards them.

Kudo had warned Hattori about this trick of the Kid's before. It was easier to defeat the phantom theif one on one, as he had a habit of blending into crowds, making it impossible to find him. Hattori looked around for something to slow the Kid down before he could hide in the crowd of police officers.

Fortunately, they were in an open air market. And being late at night, the stores were open, but there weren't many people around. "STOP!" Hattori shouted, grabbing the nearest thing handy, a large fish, and holding it up like a bokken. "The power of the fish compels you!"

The Kid stopped, backpedaling a bit as he did so. Hattori launched the fish at the Kid, hitting him in the arm. The Kid's reaction was... unexpected. He yelped, dropping the subject of tonight's heist he had been carrying and quickly turned, running the other way.

Hattori blinked. He'd been expecting much more of a fight. He shrugged and walked over to pick up the jewel. On the other hand, he wasn't going to complain if it worked.

He glanced up to see the puzzled looks of the police behind him. He shrugged, picking the fish up again. "It's a Holy Mackerel." He dryly ad-libbed.

"Hattori-kun!" An officer ran up to him, distracting their attention. "The Kid left something for you!"

"For me?"

"Hai!" The man held out a small fabric wrapped object with a tag reading 'To Hattori Heiji' on it. Curious, he handed the fish to one of the officers and took it.

It was a modified Kaito Kid doll. It still had the top hat and monocule, but was also dressed in a formal kimono, quite similar to the one he had worn. From the detailing, he could tell that makeup had been carefully applied to it's face.

"What do you think it means, Hattori-kun?" The officer asked.

For the second time in that many days, people were treated to the rare sight of Heiji doubled over in laughter.

-Finis-

'The power of the fish compels you'-? *shakes head* Don't ask. Seriously. But that scene inspired this entire thing.
-but now the whole doll thing makes sense, ne?

Not quite sure if that's an accurate number of items that the Kid has stolen... they mention it in the 3rd movie, but I kinda loaned my copy to a friend and can't double check. ^^;;

Running joke about Aoko thinking the Kid is gay comes from Volume 3, File 4, where our favourite resident witch dresses as the Kid, to prevent him from being captured. Due to Akako's feminine scream, Aoko announces that she thinks that the Kaito Kid is gay. *facefaults*