Furtive Touches
Author's Note: Kind of a mix-up between long bits of storytelling and long bits of dialogue. Way longer than my usual one-shot, and I think it kind of ends abruptly, but I'm hoping you like it regardless. No symbolism in this one, sorry to disappoint my symbolism fans, haha! Thanks for reading!
Disclaimer: I do not own Victorious.
They sat lazily on Tori's bright pink bedspread. Beck always came over for a brief stint after a particularly hard day. They weren't friends with benefits, as the emotional connection between the two ran deep. She was allowed to see him weak (nooneelsewas).
Beck intertwined their hands and rested them on his leg. Tori was really beautiful, but it just made sense for him to be with Jade. Maybe because he had been with her for so long. Besides, he didn't know Tori as well as she knew him. Maybe because he chose to be open with her, and she willingly listened, without speaking. Those few weak hours came periodically and left Tori feeling like she was the queen of Beck's world. (Jade wouldn't be dethroned so easily.)
Tori would never ask though. Never ask why Beck&Jade didn't end. Because she was afraid he'd leave her just like all the other guys who used her in the past. She wouldn't be able to handle it again. Not from Beck.
So, she just fisted her hands in Beck's maroon shirt and kissed him. He would feel better; she would make sure to make him feel better (than Jade ever could). He would realize eventually that Tori was his elegant princess in white.
But what neither realized was that Beck was trapped in one-sided dependent relationships. Jade leaned on him, he leaned on Tori. The line skewed his relationships, his feelings, and left everything in a jumbled mess.
Beck smiled gently as Tori inquired how his day went. "It's great now." Her blush was uncontrollable.
While playing with the buttons of his shirt, Tori suggested, "I was wondering whether you wanted to see that new Ryan Reynolds movie." She quickly covered up her desire by saying, "With everyone else of course. I just wanted to know if you wanted to see it."
His mouth revealed a genuine smile (Jade could never make him do that). "I'll take you. As a thank you for just being you," he said suavely, bringing his arms around her and letting his chin rest on her shoulder, revealed by the one-sided shirt she wore. Tori nodded into the back hug.
Her heart still questioned the situation. Was Beck worth it? She turned her head around, stared at his romantic, yet helpless gaze and mischievous smile, and concluded it was. Would she regret it? Probably.
/
The next day at school, things had gone back to normal. Jade had thrown a hissy fit, and Beck followed her like a puppy to calm her down. Tori observed. Jade liked being in control and having Beck pine for her; it wasn't fair on him. But apparently, he enjoyed it, too; otherwise, he would have left her in the dust a while back.
Later that night, he texted her. "I'm fed up." Tori almost miserably laughed. If it took him three years of dealing with Jade to even c.o.n.s.i.d.e.r. being fed up, then high school would finish before Beck ever thought of her seriously. No, Tori was just the desperatelyinlovebest friend, willing to do anything to help him. Can't help a boy for taking advantage, can you?
"If you loved her, you wouldn't be."
Beck came to school the next day extremely distracted and unwilling to talk to anyone but Tori. So, they locked themselves up in Sikowitz's room and talked, just talked. Because that was all Beck needed to go back to Jade.
Everything was about what Beck wanted.
So when Tori was crying after losing a job as a backup singer, Beck didn't care. Because Jade was with him, and they were making out next to his locker. He ignored Tori's calls and quickly texted her, "Don't worry about it. You'll be fine."
Tori still refused to lose him. It was one thing she held over Jade - she intimately knew Beck, and Jade didn't.
/
Jade went out of town the next week to visit family. Beck got bored, so he had Tori come over and enjoyed moments that he would never have with Jade.
They shared cherry gelato until Tori scooped up some and smashed it on his nose. Her innocent laughter sent a rush through Beck (innocence and Jade somehow would never mesh). He leaned over and kissed her behind a lamppost that barely hid them. But they didn't care because she was soinlovewith him and he felt something new with her. Things changed.
Their hands swiftly touched at lunch on Monday. Reaching for the ketchup, suuure. The blazing heat did nothing to help suppress their emotions as they thought back to last month's beach escapade. (shhh!)
Only Tori knew how much Beck's parents' upcoming divorce bothered him. Days would come where he'd merely hold onto her and allow her to feed him brownies (waybetterthandanielsaid). He would rarely cry though. He liked to bottle it up inside as much as he could. Then, Beck would go home to respond to Jade's angry texts and tell her he was at the gym. (Yeah, right, Beck. Tell the truth.)
Band class. Beck and his guitar. Tori with the latest instrument that she failed at. Over Jade's shoulders, Beck would sign '143' to Tori when she messed up so she'd giggle until Jade threatened to punch her. The charming boy would merely watch in silence as the two ladies in his life battled it out, but never spoke. He wasn't going to be the bad guy here (notnowatleast).
Beck quickly grabbed Tori's hand under the table at lunch, oblivious to the group. She smiled and stared off into space as her free hand brought a taco near her face and her heart brought a little jump.
Tori couldn't help it. What Beck did was wrong, although she made a mistake, too. And if he cheated on Jade, he could cheat on her. But somehow, Tori just didn't care because she couldn't fall out of love with Beckett Oliver.
/
At Andre's birthday party, Jade had spent the night seductively dancing next to Beck, and then complaining about a text from her mom about an emergency. So she left and in her place was Tori. (Don't worry. They were careful.)
People thought it was two friends goofing around and dancing as Tori would occasionally move to dance with the others. (shessmarterthanyouthink.) What they didn't see was the anger flash through Beck's eyes as he saw both Robbie and Andre hold her hand in the interconnected group head banging. No one noticed that Beck had an extra especially wide grin when Tori came over and whispered in his ear. And they definitely didn't see her swing her arm around his stomach like a hug (but so much more intimate). But what not a single person saw was Beck lead Tori outside and give her a pleasurable kiss in his car.
They were too good for these people. Too smart, too clever, too in love to care.
/
Broad daylight caught up with them. Cat and Robbie saw them together at the movies. It wouldn't ordinarily be unusual, but Beck had said he had to visit family, and Tori had said she was painting her room. Both excuses as to why so they couldn't go watch Daredevils in Action with Cat and Robbie. But they were watching. Alone together. Oblivious.
But who knew the silly ones would end up getting lost and driving farther up north to get to a small theater than they had to? notbeckandtori.
Beck personally delivered Tori (Red dress? She's gorgeous) flowers and a box set of Friends a day before Valentine's Day. (Jade got another pair of scissors.) She held his hand and slipped an engraved bracelet on it - 'Dream bigger. Hope together. Love forever.' They spent a relaxed evening together, fighting for Tori's comfy, brown coverlet, smashing whipped cream on each other's clothes, and shooting Nerf guns. Dorky and they love it.
That night, they sat at the beach in their secret spot where Tori finally mustered up courage. It had been six months; an answer was deserved. "Why don't you love me, Beck?"
His dark brown eyes looked grief-stricken. "I do. That's why things are like this."
"Like what?"
"Like I can't stare at you in the hallways when you wear that green shirt or kiss you when I see you get upset or scream out loud, 'Tori Vega's the most amazing girl in the world!'" His voice softened. "'And I love her more than anyone else ever could.'"
Tori laid back down on the blue plaid blanket and thought. "We're doing the wrong thing. What would you do if Jade told you tomorrow that she loves someone else?"
Immediately, the black leather of Beck's jacket crinkled when he said earnestly, "Not cared, but wished she told me earlier." Beck sighed wistfully, "That's the problem, Tori. I wouldn't care."
Tori's voice hardened, "Then, tell her."
"She'll make your life a living hell."
"What else is new?" Tori held Beck's hand and rubbed her thumb over the engravings on the glinting silver. She closed her eyes, the darkness of the night finally capturing her consciousness. Water flowed down her cheeks.
"Baby, are you okay?" Beck asked worriedly.
Tori confusedly opened one eye. "What?" He kissed her right cheek and lay down next to her. "Oh. Yeah. You know how when you're tired, tears seem to flow, but you're not really crying," she explained grinning.
He looked over at her, the tired smile, the crossed legs, her arm protectively holding onto his - she was nervous and didn't want to lose him. Beck calmly consented to her original wish, "I'll explain. I just hope that neither of us ends up with broken bones afterwards," he joked.
Tori barely responded, but moved so she could lay enclosed in Beck's arms. At least until her cell phone went off with a text from her mom seemingly yelling, "TEN THIRTY. COME HOME!"
Thus, the night ended.
/
Two weeks and Beck&Jade were still Beck&Jade. Tori liked to think she was a patient girl, but she had talked it out with Beck. Why hadn't he done it?
Beck stopped at her locker a few days later. "You're avoiding me."
"No. I'm waiting."
"For what?" he asked incredulously.
"A promise to be fulfilled." Pause. "I'm the bad girl here. I...we cheated on Jade, and I'm sorry it happened. I'll be sorry until the day you tell her and everyone forgives us."
The emotions struck Tori like a bolt of lightning. She slammed her locker, swerved into an empty English classroom, and cried. Beck coolly sat beside her, draping an arm over her shoulder until she shook it off.
"Hiding it doesn't make it excusable; it just makes it cowardice." Tori took a long, deep breath. "If-if you still want to be with Jade, I'll never stop you. Just drop me a little notice, so I can stop twiddling my thumbs." Pause. "But I don't want her to catch us. She needs to know from you."
Tori began crying again, ambushing herself in Beck's black shirt. It began to bother him - seeing Tori so worked up about this. It was his fault, anyway. He drove her home in silence and went to drop the bomb on Jade.
Beck&Jade weren't at school the next day.
/
At home, Beck played with his phone, barely able to make out the numbers through his black eye, but he knew he had to call Tori. Things didn't go as well with Jade as he had hoped, and he needed her support and comfort (as usual).
Tori answered, much to his surprise, elated that the worst was over. She brought stacks of DVDs, lemonade, and a black eye. Turns out that Tori had tried to apologize to Jade at her home, but was greeted with Jade's fist.
Somehow, Beck and Tori found the physical abuse absolutely humorous and rolled on his bed laughing. They tended to each other's injury, applying ice packs and forcing medicine down each other's throats, until they were so tired, they fell asleep on an uncomfortable bean bag together.
Someone knocked on the door, startling the two. Tori quickly ducked into her usual hiding place when Beck came over to her and said, "Tori, it's not a secret anymore, remember?" She smiled and got up as they answered the door to the confusion and wrath of Andre, Cat, and Robbie. Ready to face the world together.