AN: Warnings: Triggering due to sexual assault.

From this prompt: http: / glee- angst-meme. /7446. html? thread=10640662#t10640662 (remove spaces)

Disclaimer: I don't own Glee

Kurt and Blaine stumbled past the threshold of Kurt's bedroom, attached at the lips and not even bothering to shut the door. Finn was off playing video games at Puck's and Burt and Carole weren't due home from work for hours. The benefits of summer vacation.

The backs of Kurt's legs met with his bed and he tumbled down onto the mattress, pulling on the collar of Blaine's shirt so that his boyfriend tipped on top of him gently. Blaine chuckled softly and gazed at Kurt fondly before leaning in to press his mouth to Kurt's again. Kurt hummed happily as Blaine teased him with his lips and teeth, nipping and caressing. He slid one hand down to rest on Blaine's hip and buried the other in his thankfully gel-less curls and then grazed his tongue lightly along Blaine's bottom lip. Blaine parted his lips eagerly and sighed when Kurt slipped his tongue into his mouth. Their exploration of each other's mouths was light and delicate, tongues teasing and dancing rather than dueling or fighting for dominance. Blaine broke away after a few minutes, peppering Kurt's face with chaste little kisses. He pulled back further, panting and grinning down at the boy lying underneath him. Kurt graced him with a wide smile, relishing the rapid thumping of his heart, and how he could feel Blaine's keeping time. Blaine pressed a swift kiss to Kurt's lips once more before pulling back a little further and propping himself up on one elbow. Kurt mourned the loss of their chests pressed close together, but relished the hungry look in Blaine's eyes as his boyfriend surveyed him.

"God, Kurt, you're so beautiful," Blaine whispered, breathing still a little labored. Blaine raked his eyes over the contours of Kurt's face, lingering on his eyes, currently a deep, dark blue-gray, and then dropped his gaze a little lower, watching a drop of sweat trickle down the column of Kurt's throat and disappear under the collar of his shirt. "And sexy," he added, smirking as Kurt's already flushed face colored even more.

"Really." Kurt replied, raising one challenging eyebrow, a little smile playing on his lips.

"Seriously, Kurt, you're incredibly sexy. Every single inch of you," Blaine breathed, pressing his finger against Kurt's chest and slowly sliding his hand down, dragging his finger until he reached his navel. He moved his hand to cup Kurt's cheek and captured Kurt's bottom lip between his own.

But Kurt's lips didn't move against his. His whole body had gone still and rigid. Blaine leaned back immediately.

"Kurt?" he murmured gently.

Kurt's eyes were wide open, but he stared ahead blankly. Blaine scrambled off of his boyfriend and off the bed entirely. Kurt just lay still, unseeing. Blaine could see the rise and fall of his chest increasing in pace as his breaths became more and more shallow.

"Kurt!" Blaine cried in alarm. "Are you okay? What's happening?"

Kurt was practically hyperventilating now, his eyes still wide and glazed over, his body stiff as a board. It was if he wasn't there at all.

"Kurt, listen to me," Blaine babbled desperately, "Y-You're here, in your room, with me. Can you hear me? Listen to my voice. You're with Blaine, and you're safe. You're safe, Kurt."

Slowly, Kurt's eyes seemed to regain focus, and his breathing gradually returned to a regular pace. His eyes slid over to meet his boyfriend's. "Blaine?" His voice trembled.

"Oh, Kurt," Blaine breathed a sigh of relief, and went to lower himself on the bed as Kurt pulled himself into a sitting position. He could see his boyfriend's whole body shaking slightly. Blaine longed to reach out and touch him, but stemmed the impulse, trying to do what was right for Kurt.

"What happened?" He asked quietly after a moment.

Kurt took a deep, shuddering breath and clutched his hands together in his lap. His eyes darted about, refusing to meet Blaine's. "I-I think when you…touched me like that, it reminded me of something Karofsky did. It…it was after he gave me that death threat." Kurt squeezed his eyes shut, clearly pained by the memory. "I was so excited, I was planning Dad and Carol's wedding, and I had this little cake topper. It was the one from my parents' wedding cake." Blaine's heart ached as he watched Kurt's profile, seeing a single tear rolling down his cheek. "I was at my locker, and Karofsky came up to me. He just…he just leaned in and sort of jabbed his finger into my chest and trailed it down…I've never been more terrified." Kurt took a deep breath. "Then he took the cake topper, ripped it out of my hands, and walked away. He never did give it back."

"Kurt…I'm so sorry," Blaine said, horrified. 'I'm so sorry I reminded you of that awful moment."

Blaine almost wished Kurt would just burst into tears, so he could gather him up and soothe him. But Kurt was Kurt, and he just hugged his own torso, as though trying to hold himself together. He didn't start sobbing; he let a few dignified tears escape and looked away, his mouth set in a firm line.

"It's not your fault I'm such a mess."

"A me – No, Kurt, you are not a mess," Blaine said, quiet but resolute. He tried to resist the urge to reach out and touch, to wipe away his boyfriend's tears and pull him into a comforting hug. He knew it wouldn't do any good for Kurt to have somebody wrapped around him, so he settled for brushing his fingers ever so slightly against Kurt's nearest hand. Kurt didn't respond, but he didn't flinch away, either.

"I should be over this by now," he said bitterly, shaking his head, "Karofsky even apologized and I as good as forgave him. This shouldn't be an issue anymore."

"Kurt, you are such a compassionate and…generous person. But just because you were big enough to forgive Karofsky doesn't mean that you're not going to react instinctively when you're reminded of something that really scared you."

"So what then," Kurt bit out angrily, finally looking at Blaine, his beautiful eyes shining with unshed tears, "I'm just going to be like this forever? We've been dating for almost six months, Blaine. I can't even handle my boyfriend of almost six months touching my chest without completely losing it, not even over my clothes!"

"So I promise I will never touch you like that again, okay. I never want to do anything that makes you uncomfortable. It's just like you know that trailing your hands along my ribs tickles me more than it'll ever turn me on," Blaine reasoned, trying for a lighter tone.

Kurt was having none of it. "You know that's not all there is to it."

"You'll get there, I know you will," Blaine tried to reassure him, sliding his hand more fully over Kurt's, relieved when Kurt let him cradle his hand in his own, "You're going to be able to do the things you want, Kurt. We can take as much time as you need. I'm in no hurry."

"That's just it, though, Blaine," Kurt met his gaze again, and Blaine felt like bursting into tears at the pain and resignation in his boyfriend's expression. "What if I never get there? What if…what if I can't ever give you what you want? What if I can't be the boyfriend you need?"

And now Kurt's last bit of control left him and his face crumpled.

"Hey, come here," Blaine whispered and held his arms out, thankful when Kurt turned towards him and leaned on his shoulder. He wrapped his arms around his boyfriend lightly, rubbing circles on his back as Kurt cried silently, his body hitching with each breath. Blaine nuzzled his face against Kurt's soft hair, breathing in his vanilla and cinnamon scent.

"Kurt, I love you. I love all of you. Before we started dating you were my best friend, and you still are. That will never change. And I will never not want to be with you. You make me so happy; you make me a better person, stronger and braver. I'm so grateful that I have you in my life, especially as my boyfriend. And if that's all you want to do, if all you ever feel comfortable with is kissing me, then that's all I want. I-I don't wanna screw this up, Kurt. I won't jeopardize what we have for anything, and especially not for something that scares you or upsets you. Okay? I love you."

Kurt's crying had gradually tapered off, although he was sniffling slightly. He nodded in Blaine's embrace and pulled back slightly, offering his boyfriend a very tentative and very watery smile.

"I love you, too, Blaine. I…I wasn't sure I'd ever have a boyfriend. And you're so much more than I ever imagined, because you're, well, you're you. You're…Blaine."

Blaine smiled at his normally articulate boyfriend's sudden lack of vocabulary. He followed his boyfriend as Kurt leaned back onto the bed, pulling on Blaine's shirt collar so that they wound up lying on their sides, wrapped in each other's arms. When Kurt smiled at him, Blaine leaned in and pressed a soft kiss to his lips. Kurt cupped the back of Blaine's neck, letting the kiss linger a little more before pressing their foreheads together and closing his eyes. Blaine reached up and smoothed away the last of his tears.

"I want to," Kurt murmured after a minute, his eyes still shut and his cheeks turning pink, "You know, with you. Just…eventually. Some day."

Blaine dropped a whisper of a kiss on the corner of Kurt's mouth. "Some day," he agreed.