Apologies

Author: mrstrentreznor

Title: Apologies

Rating: NC-17 for sex, language and themes
Fandom: Twilight. AU

Pairing: Bella and Paul

Feedback: please and thankyou

Author's Notes: this started out as a one-shot

Disclaimer: the characters and all recognisable situations belong to Stephenie Meyer - this is a work of fan fiction, except for the legends and histories of the Quileute that, of course, belong to them. I pay my respects to their gods.

Summary: Bella makes contact and then a contract with a bad boy. AU MA

AN: in my fantasy worlds, it is always disease and pregnancy free… but not in the real world, so remember safe sex always children…

1. Surprise!

Saturday March 11th 2006

Bella stood in the shower. She had had an intense few days. She knew Edward was a vampire and now she knew that Jake was a werewolf… and man, what was up with that? Was it her? She somehow attracted these things… next there would be fairies and elves popping up in her life. Yeesh.

And she had almost slapped one of them when he called her a leech lover.

Whoa. She didn't know she had it in her. He had shouted at her and been seriously weird. But then he had turned into a giant wolf and Jake had stopped him from tearing her apart. It was equal parts terrifying and exciting. She could admit now that it had been exciting.

She sighed. She felt so tense. She found her hand sneaking down to touch herself; to relieve some of her tension. She had discovered this recently. After Edward had gone, he had left her so sexually wound up and wanting. Six months of dating, with barely a kiss; let alone a proper kiss… you know, with tongue. She couldn't do anything when he watched her sleep. Masturbation was supposed to be slightly naughty, not life threatening. Doing it with a Victorian vampire in her bedroom was a very bad idea. He couldn't even kiss her properly; he would have been completely overcome by her scent if she had rubbed one out in front of him. The thought had crossed her mind a couple of times. She giggled. Thank goodness he couldn't read her mind.

She soaped up her hand with a moisturising body wash and ran her now lubricated fingers through her own folds. She breathed out a long sigh. Oh yes. She thought about a gorgeous man doing this to her. It didn't really matter who he was; he was faceless and anonymous. It struck her that she had never imagined Edward doing this for her. She closed her eyes. She was wetter now. She stroked herself again.

She heard a noise downstairs.

She froze.

The third step creaked. Whoever it was was coming up the stairs. And it wasn't Jake; he always stepped over that step. She turned the water off, to try and hear better.

The bathroom door opened. Her heart was pounding now. She shivered.

Through the semi transparent shower curtain she saw a russet skinned figure enter the bathroom.

"Jake?" she asked tremulously, though she knew it wasn't.

"Guess again chickadee…"

She gasped. It was that guy… the one she had wanted to slap… Paul. It was Paul.

"What are you doing? And here," she hissed at him. She held her hands over her body. Berating herself internally for not getting out of the shower and grabbing a towel earlier. He picked it up now and reached up a hand to the rings of the shower curtain.

"Get out!" she shouted at him.

He jerked back the curtain; he stood looking at her. He was wearing nothing other than the cut-offs that seemed to be their uniform now. His nostrils flared and his chin lifted slightly, as if he was scenting something.

His head tilted and he gave her a leer.

"What are you up to little girl?" he asked. He could smell her; oh Holy Crow he could smell her.

She just blushed and cowered back against the wall. "Get out!" she hissed again.

He smiled. It was not a pretty smile.

"Poor little lost lamb…" he crooned at her. "A 100 year old virgin followed by an oblivious 16yr old. You can pick 'em."

"What…?" she blustered.

"It would be funny if it wasn't so pathetic."

"What are you doing…?" she shook her head. "Never mind… just get out."

His head tilted again. He gave her a serious eye fuck. He reached a hand down and adjusted himself in his cut-offs.

She gasped again. What the hell was he thinking?

"No." He said it decisively as if there wasn't another option.

"No?"

Silence.

"Jake will kill you." Why did she say that? Why didn't she demand he leave?

He shrugged. "Don't care," he said blithely.

He reached out one long arm and stroked a finger down the side of her waist. It left a trail of goose bumps behind it. She shrank further into the wall. He held the towel up in his hand.

"What do I get for this?" he asked.

"Nothing," she spat at him.

He laughed.

"Ah girl… you forget… or maybe… maybe you just don't know yet…"

That hand reached toward her again. She tried to anticipate where it was going, but in rushing to cover where she thought he was headed, she uncovered something else. He moved impossibly fast and tweaked her exposed nipple.

She squeaked. Her nipple felt so hard it hurt.

He hummed in appreciation.

"W-what…" she stuttered out. "What don't I know yet?"

"Distraction?" He chuckled. His voice dropped into a lower register. "I can hear your heart rate increase. I can tell it is excitement… not fear. I can smell you." He inhaled deeply. "And you smell… excited." He paused and sniffed again. "You smell… good," he finished.

She stared at him.

"You need something…" he eyed her up and down again. She licked her suddenly dry lips.

He noticed.

"…and I am going to give it to you," he stated. He gestured at his body. "You want this?" he asked her.

"Jake will kill you," she whispered. She didn't really answer him, either way.

"Told ya… don't care." He shrugged and reached for the waistband of his, now tented, cut-offs.

He seemed to know she was watching him. Truth be told, she couldn't take her eyes off him. She was having trouble breathing; it was as if all the oxygen had suddenly been sucked out of the bathroom.

He paused. His hands tracked back up his body and he ran them down his washboard abs; the fingers tracing over the muscle definition. She watched him do it. He slowly traced the fine line of hairs that ran from below his navel to places further down. She shivered.

She sucked in a breath. Her mouth was hanging open as she watched him.

He stared at her and slid that hand inside the front of his shorts. She could see his hand wrapped around his now solid length. His eyes closed and his head tilted back.

He emitted a guttural moan.

She gasped. She felt a rush of warmth as places low in her body tightened. His nostrils flared again.

He opened his eyes. She was staring, fascinated at that hand inside his shorts.

She tried hard to pull herself together. She tried to get him to stop. "Jake will kill you," she reminded him again. But she didn't say 'no'.

"If my last memory is being balls deep inside you… I will go happy," he said.

"B-balls deep?" she stuttered. She had no idea what that meant.

He laughed. Completely aware that she was watching him he withdrew that hand and reached for the waistband of his shorts. He slid them off his hips. They caught on his jutting cock and he lifted them over it.

They hit the floor and he stepped out of them.

She made some small noise of shock and awe. She had never seen a naked man before. Not in the flesh at any rate. And a naked excited man… She was suddenly aware that she could hear herself breathing. She was panting. She clutched her arms tighter around herself; holding herself together.

He stepped into the shower with her. She couldn't back away any further but she tried to. His hands locked around her wrists and lifted them easily away from her body. She tried to stop him but it was pointless. He held them against the wall. She was now splayed out for his inspection. He made another humming noise. "Nice," he muttered.

He suddenly crouched a little and pressed his whole body up against her. He lifted himself up and everything he had scraped up against the front of her body. She made another helpless yelp noise.

He chuckled again.

"Jake…" she squeaked. She wasn't sure now, if she was reminding him or herself.

"Shut up," he growled at her.

He still had her hands held against the wall. This was nothing like any fantasy she had ever had. The tiled wall was cold against her back and she shivered suddenly. She felt her nipples peak.

"Wow," he said.

He eyed her body again, and then he brought his face in close to her neck. She could feel her pulse pounding in her neck. He leant right in and scented her again, behind the ear somewhere. She turned her head away instinctively. But it was a mistake. She had now exposed her whole neck to him. She had submitted in animal terms.

He licked up that pounding vein and she moaned.

He was so hot. She could feel waves of heat coming off him. She closed her eyes when he licked her again.

"Mmmm." His wet mouth moved from her neck down to her collar bone. He almost nibbled on it. She shivered and twitched. And then his body bent sideways and his hot, wet mouth travelled lower. He latched onto one of her nipples and she jerked hard enough to bang the back of her head on the tiles.

She moaned again. She wanted to touch him. Those shoulders filled her vision. His skin. Such a beautiful colour. She could see her own hand lift and slide across the back of his wide shoulders. It was like an out of body experience. It wasn't her doing this. She didn't do this. She had never done this. Her fingers traced up the back of his neck and into his hair

He nibbled at her breast and she yelped once more.

He stood again and grabbed the top of her arms in his hands. He spun her body and forced her front up against the wall. Her face turned to the side. Her overheated nipples were now pressed against the cold tiles.

That mouth nibbled at the back of her neck now. She tried to push away from the wall but she ran up against his solid body. She whimpered at the feel of him.

He pressed himself up against the back of her. She groaned.

"Oh yeah…" he agreed.

His hands started to roam all over her body. Her own hands were splayed against the wall as if they were trying to ground her; before she spiralled off somewhere.

One of his searching hands slid down the front of her body and between her legs. It was oddly, exactly what she had been fantasising about earlier. How did he know?

He whispered to her. "All lubed up and ready to go, huh?" He was the voice of the devil literally at her shoulder. "Is this what you were playing at? ... What were you imagining, chickie? I could smell you on the stairs."

She couldn't answer him. Those long slim fingers were sliding over her. It was so different when it wasn't her hand. She was so wet.

"Who were you thinking about? Hmmm."

"Nobody." She shivered again and gasped a little as his clever fingers stroked her. He forced his thigh between her legs and pushed them apart further. She moaned.

"I was only going to frighten you a little… but damn… chickie…" he whispered to her.

"Please," she begged.

"Yeah? You want a piece of this?" He slid his engorged cock between her legs. It was so hot. She looked down. She could see the darkened head as it protruded through the front of her folds.

"Ohhh…"

"Hmmm chickie… tell me you want this…" His hand was working at her now. She was so wet, as his middle finger slid across her clit and the other fingers stroked over her outer labia. He stroked his whole hand up and down against her. She watched him do it. The muscles and veins in his arm twitching. She felt a heavy ache within her. She pressed herself against that hand.

"Ugh."

"Hmm?" he asked.

Had he asked her a question? She couldn't remember. He seemed to want an answer to something.

"What?" she managed to say.

He spoke slowly. Each word precise and careful and timed with a stroke across her clitoris. "Do… you… want… me… to… fuck… you?" That middle finger slid inside her and he pressed hard against her clit.

"Yes…" she hissed.

"Yes?" he asked.

"Please," she begged. She pressed her heated forehead against the tiles. She tried to cool herself down. But it was too late. She had gone way past the point of no return. But he did ask, she had to give him that.

He slid his leg under her knee and lifted her whole body. She squeaked; frightened she would lose her balance.

"I've got you," he told her. "You won't fall."

He had opened her out; splayed her out against the wall. Her toe gripped against something on the wall. His other hand was under her opposite armpit with his arm out straight and his hand flat against the wall. She was suspended; hanging on one of his arms and one leg.

She let herself go. She leant her head back against his shoulder and slid her hand down his arm to lie over the top of his hand between her legs.

"Just like that," he told her. "That's it…"

Her hand dipped lower and brushed across the head of his cock. It seemed to be leaking. He drew in a shaky breath when she did that.

"Mmm," he hummed against her neck.

His hand moved and he shifted his body a little. The head of his cock rose and unerringly found her entrance.

She sucked in a breath. "Oh… oh…"

He held her open with the fingers of one hand and he shifted his hips a little. He slid into her part way. It felt amazing. He returned to his earlier stroking of her clit. But now he added the slight rocking of his hips that allowed just the head to slide in and out of her.

"Oh…oh," she repeated. She was completely overwhelmed. He was hot and wet and he was there and she was having trouble breathing… she was about to fall apart in his arms. She felt her whole body tense up. She was gasping for air again. Gasping and panting against him.

The rocking continued and it all started to combine into something much bigger. Something she had never felt before.

She was losing it. She tried to climb up nothing. Her hands scrabbling at the wall in her frenzy. Her whole body tensed up and she froze for a beat.

With a final stroke of his fingers she fell over the edge. She collapsed against him; all the air rushing out of her lungs. He seemed to be waiting for that and he thrust himself into her; hard and fast. She screamed. She felt like he was splitting her in two.

"Christ!" he swore. "You are so tight…"

"Ahhh," she wailed. He held her around the body and tight against him. They both froze. He was panting against her neck. She could feel gusts of his heated breath pass over her skin.

Her vision felt dark at the edges. She almost passed out. His hand stroked the skin over her ribs where he was holding her immobile against him. His lips pressed against her jugular where her pulse was pounding again.

He made a tiny movement; almost a rock into her. She wriggled a little against him and just the feel of him inside her made her feel light headed. So hard and so big.

"You okay?" he asked.

She nodded. She couldn't speak.

"Really?" he checked. His nostrils flared. "Blood," he stated.

She nodded again.

"Huh," he said as if he hadn't expected that. "Sorry," he added.

She shook her head. "It's… okay…" she panted. She tried to shift a little where she was impaled upon him.

He groaned.

Oh now, she hadn't thought about that. That she could affect him. She did it again. He clutched her to him.

"Stop," he begged her.

She felt immeasurably powerful at that. Weak little Bella Swan had him at her mercy. But of course she was hanging in the air, skewered on him. The knowledge was useless to her now, but it was a revelation.

"Finish it…" she told him.

"Uh-huh," he agreed. He shifted his feet, getting a better stance she assumed. She clutched at his straight arm. He rocked his hips again. She gasped a little. She felt abraded inside. But with each gentle rock, his passage into her became easier. Until he was sliding almost his whole length out and then rammed it back into her. She could feel that curling tension rising again.

"Talk," she ordered him. She had no idea where that came from.

He laughed. "Oh so you like that huh?" he seemed to like it too. His lips nibbled at her ear and he started to whisper to her. "You are so wet… can you feel how wet you are… how I can just slide into you…" he grunted as he thrust into her. "All the way into you…"

She moaned.

"This…" he told her as he slammed into her, "This… is balls… deep, chickie."

"Oh… I see," she admitted. And now that he had told her, she could feel them.

"But right now…" he panted in her ear. "I want to feel you come… come so hard… so hard that you grip my cock …can you do that for me, chickie?"

"Yes," she groaned.

She squirmed. She needed something more.

"Touch yourself," he suggested; that devilish voice at her shoulder again. She felt wanton as her hand slid lower, just as it had before he had rudely interrupted her. She touched herself and she could feel him thrust into her. He pinched her nipple; rubbed it hard between his fingers.

"Come on chickie… let go… I can smell you… you're so close… so close to exploding…"

"Yes," she agreed. "Oh…oh…" She needed to touch him. She reached down to hold him at the thigh; feeling it bunch and move under her fingers as he thrust into her. He was so strong; so powerful. She shifted her hand towards his face. And somehow he sucked her fingers into his mouth; his tongue sliding between them.

It was that feeling that pushed her over the edge. She had a flash of him doing that between her legs with that hot wet tongue and she was gone. She clenched him hard. She damn near snapped him in half.

He thrust up and just kept thrusting. "Ohh Jesus…" he swore. "Oh yeah…" He shuddered and gasped behind her and she felt a warm gush inside her. He groaned and sank his face down into her neck. She could feel him kiss at her neck; little open mouthed kisses. They stayed in that position for some time.

He lowered her gently to her feet. She almost fell. She felt boneless. She managed to turn and clutch at him. He put his arms around her. Pulled her in against him.

"Shh… shh," he comforted her and it was only then that she realised she was crying.

She tried to stand by herself. He held her face in both hands; his thumbs wiped away her tears. He looked worried. "Jeez… was it that bad?" he asked.

She just shook her head; she had no words.

He leant back against the wall and pulled her in against him. Weirdly she felt like she belonged there. She pressed her face against his chest. His hand was on the back of her neck under her hair. His fingers stroked down her neck.

He seemed to wait until she could breath evenly again.

"Here," he said, "Let's put the water back on. I think we both need a wash." He shuffled her out, onto the bathroom floor and turned the water on; waited for it to heat up again.

She looked down at herself. A number of fluids ran down her thighs. She looked at his body. His cock, now flaccid, was stained with her blood. She reached out a hand and touched his thigh. She looked up at him.

"Yeah… about that… sorry…" he shrugged. "I didn't really think… you were… I mean you are so…" he stopped talking. He chewed at his lip.

His eyes looked… worried…? He didn't know she was a virgin.

"Sorry…" he started to say but she placed her hand over his mouth.

She leant in towards him. "Paul," she said. It was the first time she had said his name. She took her hand away.

"Yeah?" he breathed.

"When can we do it again?" she asked.

"Again?" he repeated. He smiled and then he laughed out loud. He pulled her into him and he kissed her.

When he finally let her breathe, she asked, "So what are you doing here anyway?"

"Jake and Sam sent me," he confessed. "To apologise."

She laughed.

FF_2154210_ - 27/06/2011 06:27:00 PM