Part 2

"Therefore I tell you, do not be anxious about your life,

what you shall eat or what you shall drink, nor about your

body, what you shall put on. Is not life more than food,

and the body more than clothing?"

- Saint Matthew, Matthew: 6:25

"See, I had been feeling a little off all day." Chuck started then paused. His hand shook as he poured himself a drink from Dean's bottle of Jack. He brought the glass to his lips and quickly downed the drink before pouring himself another. He quickly downed that one and cleared his throat as the liquor burned its way down his throat in a familiar way he hasn't felt for years. Dean and Cas quietly watched the prophet, impatiently waiting for their friend to begin. Chuck poured his third and Dean sighed loudly.

"Chuck?" Castiel prompted gently.

Chuck downed the third drink and slammed the table onto the table. He put his fingers on the bridge of his nose as he sighed loudly. "I thought it was just the mystery meat I'd eaten for lunch, but even after a bathroom break I'd been feeling weird still." He shook his head with a hysterical laugh. "I thought maybe I just needed some sleep….The next thing I know i'm getting this huge headache and I pass out!" He looked at both men with a huge smile. "I woke up with a bloody nose and a headache the size of Texas."

Dean was at the end of his patience. "The vision Chuck."

Chuck shook his head. "I need paper and something to write with." He said and Castiel was quick to comply with the demand.

Chuck sighed heavily as he began to write what looked like addresses. "The vision was a little fuzzy around the edges, but I got the gist of it." He explained as he continued to write. He wrote down seven addresses then drew a line underneath them and began to draw a seal.

Both Castiel and Dean moved closer to the prophet to see what he was drawing.

"I'm not the greatest artist." He babbled as he began to draw what seemed to be Enochian symbols inside the circular seal. "Whoever sent these images into my dome must've been in a hurry because this was all I got." He finished off the drawing and handed the paper to Dean.

Dean snatched the paper from Chuck's hands with a deep frown. He studied the symbol for along moment. "What the hell is this supposed to mean?" He asked.

"The Seven Rays." Castiel, who had been quiet for the most part, spoke up. "It's the seal of God."

Chuck's eyes widened and Dean stared at Castiel with a serious intensity that Cas hadn't seen for years.

Dean carefully placed down the piece of paper and glanced at Chuck. "Leave us alone will you." He ordered.

Chuck nodded and was out of his seat quickly. "I'll just take this." He said, grabbing Dean's bottle of whiskey. He moved around Dean and patted Cas on the shoulder as he went. He paused in the doorway to glance back at the two men. "I've never been happier to be brain raped in my entire life."

He shut the door with a quiet click on his way out leaving both men alone.

Castiel didn't understand why the words he wanted to speak suddenly felt balled in his throat and stuck there. The hopeful news he needed to share with Dean was temporarily lost as the man he had once called his best friend stared at him with an unreadable expression. He realized, he could not read the expression on Dean's face because there wasn't one. There was nothing, but an empty stare that made Cas's heart drop inside his stomach.

It was Dean who broke the spell first, speaking calmly. "I don't like this."

Castiel raised eyebrow in surprise. "What? Dean how can you-"

"Heaven doesn't exist anymore." Dean cut in sharply. "What if this is a trick? What if Lucifer is playing games with us?"

Castiel could understand Dean's doubts. He knew no amount words at this moment would help convince Dean as otherwise. Swallowing hard, he moved even closer, ignoring Dean's wary expression. Cas lifted his head as he evaded Dean's personal space. He could feel the small spark of grace his brother had pushed inside of him and he was almost cowed by it. Almost once against brought the tears by the small spark he felt rushing from deep within him toward his fingertips.

"Cas?" started with a deep frown. "What the f-" He trailed off as Cas placed his hand over the handprint burned into his shoulder. His eyes widened and he let out a loud gasp from the sudden rush of heat the rushed through his body. He pushed the former Angel's hand away and stumbled backward into the chair he had been sitting in. Even without Castiel touching him, his body trembled as he still felt the aftershocks from such a simple touch. The former angel merely stared at Dean, his eyes dark with something he'd set himself to ignore for the past few years. "Cas, are you.."

"I'm still human." Cas cut in. "That was just…" He trailed off as he tried to find the right words. "Absolution." He tilted his head. "Now will you listen to reason?"

88

'The first ray of God's will, power, strength, courage, protection and faith.' Castiel paced the small space of his cabin as he fought to remember his teachings on the seven rays. He ran a hand down his face, feeling frustrated that the knowledge didn't just come to him as it once did. His hands shook and his body trembled from a familiar need. His hands clenched as he fought the terrible urge to head into his stash. He could already taste the bitter pill on his tongue and if he closed his eyes he could feel the euphoric bliss of getting lost away from reality. It had been more than fourteen hours since his last pill and if he took just one he could organize his thoughts. He was already moving toward his stash, blindly picking up the bottle of amphetamines. He could take just one instead of the normal two and a half that he usually takes. He turned, bottle in hand, letting out an unmanly yelp as he came face to face with Dean.

He clutched the pill bottle tighter in his hands, feeling suddenly ashamed at being caught. A feeling he had long ago buried. "Dean…"

Dean eyed the pill bottle for a long moment before looking up at Castiel with an annoyed expression. "Rule number one for this little journey of ours," He snatched the pill bottle out of Cas's hands and tossed it onto the bed. "No pills."

Dean was looking at him with that look that says he was a waste of space and Castiel responded the way he always would. "Of course fearless leader."

Dean's eyes narrowed dangerously. "We're meeting in five." He said stiffly. He turned to go, but paused to glance over his shoulder.

Castiel tensed as he waited for Dean's cutting hateful words, but relaxed when none came. Dean merely shook his head once and left, flinging the beads to the side in annoyance.

88

"Why does it have to be just you two?" Risa asked and Castiel doesn't hide rolling his eyes.

He hated her. Just because she was the "lieutenant" here at the camp and happens to be fucking their fearless leader more often than not she thinks she's entitled to this important mission.

"Because it started with Dean and Cas and it has to end with them." Chuck answered and she glared at him.

"What about finding the colt? For all we know you could be walking into a trap."

"We have no leads on the colt." Dean answered. "I need you here at the camp Risa. You and Chuck will be in charge."

Dean was looking at her with a softness that had Castiel leaving in the middle of the meeting, ignoring Chuck's question of where he was going.

88

Cas stuffed the few books he thought would be helpful into his duffle bag before zipping it up. He glanced up as Chuck came through the door.

"Dean's waiting." Chuck said. He handed Cas an envelope. "I was told to give th1is to you. Don't open it until you're sure you should."

Castiel frowned as he turned the sealed envelope over. He glanced up at Chuck who shrugged. "Just doing what my noggin told me to do." He smiled a bit hesitantly before continuing. "I think I should tell you that I saw…." He trailed off with a nervous laugh. "Just stay close to each other huh? I know you guys aren't as close as you used to be, but maybe this journey will repair the relationship you…." He trailed off again as Cas turned and walked away from him. "Oh. Okay! Hey well be safe!"

Dean was waiting, truck loaded with weapons and supplies, he was talking to Risa who was standing close to his side as she handed him the keys to the truck.

"Don't die." She said gruffly.

Dean started the truck up. "Same to you." He said and glanced over at Cas. "You ready?"

Castiel tossed his bag into the back and climbed into the truck beside Dean. "Let's go."

88

"It's not so bad."

Cas, who was busy staring at his hands turned to look at Dean who was watching him. "What?"

Dean shrugged. "Being human." He moved to stand beside the former angel. "Sure some things suck ass, but there are some good things too."

Castiel closed his eyes. "Like what?" He asked.

Dean was quiet for a long moment before answering. "Like a cold beer." He said. He touched Cas's arm so that he was looking at him. "An awesome car."

Castiel's lips twitched as he stared at the man he considered his best friend. "Is that all?" He asked with slight amusement.

"There's getting laid.." Dean trailed off with a slight wince. "Uhh."

Castiel turned so that he was fully facing Dean, uncaring that he was breaking the appropriate space rule. "I am glad that you care Dean."

Dean shrugged. "Yeah well. World's turning to shit around her heads. Gotta stick together."

Castiel gave dean that creepy stare that always made Dean feel like the guy was staring through to his soul which sounded awfully girly.

"Cas, Man you.." He was cut off by Castiel's surprisingly soft lips. The kiss was a shock, but very brief. So brief Dean would think it never happened because one moment his lips were full against Castiel's fuller ones and the second later they weren't. He blinked at Cas who seemed surprised by his own actions.

Dean licked his lips and placed an arm around Castiel's shoulders. "Let's get out of here before Bobby calls out a search party."

Castiel was still frowning as they made their way through the junkyard toward Bobby's. "Dean, I'm-"

"I'm going to teach you how to really kiss." Dean interrupted softly.

888

Castiel's eyes slid open as the truck suddenly jerked to the left. He glanced over at Dean who was staring intently at the road ahead of him. Castiel watched him silently. He wanted to reach out. How easy it once was to just touch the man he had once called his best friend. He turned away and glanced out at the passing scenery as they drew closer to their destination of Smithfield, Virginia. He closed his eyes, rubbing the uncomfortable ache he felt growing inside his chest. Dean had barely acknowledged his presence and he wanted to laugh the fact that the fate of the world rested heavily on both of their shoulders.

TBC More soon