Bonus Chapter: Optimus' side of the horrific Wendy's Frosty Spill of 84.

Spike hung his arm out the driver's window as they drove down the empty desert road. He surfed his hand in the wind, up and down as he enjoyed the drag. Optimus was relaxed too, his engine humming as they sped. Moments like this were nice to spend with a friend, but Optimus knew it could go bad all too easily. At least Spike was preoccupied with the wind at present, and wasn't moving around.

When they entered the last town before base, Spike pulled his hand inside. "Optimus, do you think we have time for me to get a bite?"

Optimus thought about it. He'd been having trouble getting the Autobots assembled for a meeting on time, and had given a speech on tardiness at the end of the last meeting. He felt like such a stickler when he had to lecture the bots, especially with Ratchet and Ironhide teasing the offenders. It would look very bad if he himself was late for the next meeting. But he'd never say no to his little friend Spike's needs. As much as he disliked what he was about to do, there was no escape.

"Of course, but you'll have to…" Optimus choked internally on the words. "You'll have to eat on the road."

"Really? You never let me do that! Okay," he looked at the passing restaurants, "Let's go to Wendy's."

A few minutes later Spike returned with a bag and a drink, jumping into the cab with a bounce in his step. His backside landed on Optimus' seat with a bounce too, causing the mech to shiver.

"Oops," the boy said, "I always forget you're sensitive. You must have some kind of robot skin condition, huh?"

"Perhaps," Optimus said with a grumble. At least Spike was outstandingly far off in his assumptions. It was better he thought the mech had a condition than to know he was sitting inside of Optimus' sweet spot.

Spike set the bag on the passenger seat, and Optimus felt the heat from the contents warming him. That felt excellent too.

"Um, Optimus?"

"Oh, my apologize. I was distracted."

Optimus pulled out of the four parking spaces he'd been taking up horizontally and left town. The next part of the journey was far less appealing. More shredded lettuce dropped onto his seat, cold and clammy against the leather. Crumbs fell here and there, and Optimus felt desperate to get into the shower room and power-wash his insides. Spike took a suck at the frosty he was drinking, a half-eaten burger in the other hand. Optimus had turned on the radio in an attempt to distract himself from the mess being made. And Primus bless the kid, he was trying so hard to be tidy.

"Mmm, I love this song!" Spike said, and he put his drink between his knees to free a hand. He reached for the dial on the stereo. The feel of his denim sliding forward, rough in comparison to Optimus' smooth red leather was unbearable. Optimus' whole alt-form shuddered as Spike took his volume knob between two fingers and turned it.

"Oh Primus," Optimus blurted out.

"Crap I forgot that bothers you!" Spike said, yanking his hand away from the radio.

"Ungh it's fine," Optimus tried to say to make the boy feel better. "Just let me know what you want and I'll do it for you."

"Yeah I guess hands-free radio is pretty sweet," Spike said positively. He began to sing along. "You got the touch, you got the power! When all hell's breakin' loose, you'll be riding the eye of the storm!" He reached into the bag on the passenger seat to pull out a few fries. The paper brushing against Optimus was excruciatingly good.

On the way to his mouth, a stray fry fell down and bounced on the floor. In an instant a series of monstrous events occurred. The fry fell. "Oops," Spike said, leaning forward to grab it. That's when the drink slipped from between his knees, the top-heavy cup swinging backward, the lid slipping open to dump ice-cold chocolate frosty all over the driver's seat and floor carpeting.

"Woh!" Optimus said, his alt-form jerking roughly from the icy sensation, like an ice cube down a human's shirt, as the prank went. From the hot bag to the icy drink, it was erotic torture.

"Oh my god I am so sorry!" Spike said, leaning over and pulling out a wad of napkins from the bag.

"N-no don't clean it," Optimus cringed, all of the sensations already unbearable. His engines were so hot; he drove faster hoping to suck in more air to cool him. He felt tremors far and few between, but slowly and steadily increasing, increasing somewhere he did not want to go with a human inside.

"Oh but I can't leave this mess," Spike said as he threw down half the napkins onto the floor carpeting.

"Don't," Optimus said, ecstasy creeping in the back of his vocals.

Spike began to wipe down the mess, each stroke sending Optimus swerving a different direction. "I know, I know, but I've almost got it," Spike said, trying to be sensitive to the bogus condition. Optimus did everything in his power to suppress the moans fighting to escape his muted vocals. He'd completely silenced them now, not trusting himself to speak normally.

"I'm almost done," Spike said as he wiped off his lap, then scooted back to wipe off the seat between his legs. He rubbed hard back and forth, quick jerks against the rosy leather. Optimus' sensors were hitting the top. Oh sweet Primus and all the sparks in the Allspark, please don't stop now…

Optimus saw stars as he overloaded, his engine roaring and screeching, his wheels tearing up the pavement as he rocketed down the highway. He slid off the road in a daze, came back quickly and braked as hard as he could. Desert dust blew up in a cloud behind them as they slid to a stop. Spike smacked back against the seat, his arms gripping the inside of the cab like he was preparing to die. There was a moment of silence before the air blew out of his lungs.

"Optimus, are you okay? Jesus you need to see Ratchet about this, this is serious…" and he yapped on and on as Optimus sat on the side of the road, unable to do anything but relish the bliss he was in. He couldn't speak, he couldn't move, he couldn't online his alt-optics. In a nanosecond he would recover and apologize and make excuses and rush to the meeting, but for this nanosecond, the crisis was his to enjoy.

Author's note:

Sorry! The delay was due to my inability to be satisfied with my bonus chapter. Then someone made a request that sparked this and voila!

I didn't expect such a turnout for my first transformers fic. I'm happy people approved. So many people offered good ideas for Optimus' kink, but I was set on finding a kink that was inhuman.

So thanks again, and don't forget to transform and review!