tonight you told me

that you ache for something new

and some other woman is lookin' like something

that might be good for you

go on and hold her 'til the screaming is gone

go on believe her when she tell you nothing's wrong

but I'm the only one

who'll walk across the fire for you

I'm the only one

who'll drown in my desire for you

- Melissa Etheridge, "I'm the Only One"

...

Red. The world was a bright, bright red. Alex tried to close her eyes, only to realize that they were already closed. This surprised her enough that she opened them - and then immediately regretted having done that, as the sunlight streaming through the bedroom window and onto her face went right into them.

"Aaaahhhhhh..." Shading her eyes, she stood up out of the bed, stepped over to the window, and drew the curtain quickly across it. That dimmed the light to a tolerable level - which, unfortunately, was a much lower level than she had just been exposed to, and Alex found herself blinking in what, to her dazzled eyes, seemed a completely dark room.

I don't remember going to bed. Last thing I remember is falling asleep on top of Justin, and...

Now, there are some who would say that Alex Russo has no shame. This list actually includes some of her friends and family. These people would have been startled by the bright red flush that came to her cheeks as she recalled exactly what she had done on top of her brother before falling asleep the previous evening. Oh. Oh, God. She put a hand to her forehead and rubbed, realizing between her memory and the degree to which the morning sunlight had pained her that the few drinks she'd decided to have before she'd come home to console herself over her continued failure to find a part-time job had affected her more than she'd thought.

She opened the bedroom door, stepped out, and held her left hand up to shield her eyes from the glare coming through the picture window at the end of the living area as she ducked into the bathroom and closed the door - to keep out that same glare, since Justin would be long gone to take the exam he'd been studying for the night before.

Shading her eyes again, she flicked on the light, then slowly lifted her hand away and looked at herself in the mirror. Her hair was a mess, but she otherwise didn't look any worse for wear - no bloodshot eyes, no puffiness, and, of course, the old yellow robe wasn't anything she could mess up by sleeping in...

Alex stopped and looked at the robe in the mirror. She didn't ever wear that robe to sleep in. Ever. Which meant that she hadn't gotten to bed on her own. That Justin must have carried her into the bedroom and... and Alex bit her lip at the pulse that she felt between her legs from the thought. I'm surprised he didn't take this off me and dress me in pajamas, she thought with a little smirk. Wouldn't he have been surprised at what I wasn't wearing underneath.

As she was thinking this, Alex moved over to the bathtub and turned the water on, twisting the knob a little to the right as she did - Justin seemed to like his showers a bit hotter than she did. Something about hotter water being better for killing germs, although she suspected it was really just that he couldn't let himself do something that was purely enjoyable. That brought forth a sigh as she shrugged out of the robe and hung it from the end of the towel bar. He really needs to relax and take a night off. A weekend would be better, but there's no way I'm getting him to do that until the semester break. She put her foot under the spigot, found the water temperature good, pulled the shower curtain closed, then reached in at the side and turned the shower on. I should surprise him. Cook him something nice this weekend, give him another backrub. Maybe take him out somewhere. I'm sure Boston's got to have a comic store.

The water having run for a few seconds, Alex stepped into the shower and closed her eyes, letting it cascade over her in warm sheets, soaking in the feeling of it. Can't do that until this weekend, though. He was stressing like hell over that exam this morning. Wonder how it went. What time is it anyway? It couldn't be too late, she realized - the sun had been coming in the windows, so it was still morning. Probably no later than ten. I can go to campus and meet him for lunch, make him do something besides study for a few minutes. And some of his professors wanted to see Ricky anyway. Yeah...

As it turned out, Alex's shower was interrupted after about three minutes by Ricky, who decided just then that he needed to be changed. And then fed. And then just held for a few minutes. After accomplishing all of this, Alex was finally able to finish washing her hair - a somewhat extended process, with the volume that she had. Looking in the mirror after finishing up, though, she thought the effect was definitely worth it. I look like I should be in a commercial. Something talking about vitamins and oils and stuff. She smiled a little, not thinking at all about how much she knew Justin loved soft, shiny hair as she held up a few different hair decorations one by one to see how they went with her outfit.

...

It was 11:27, and Justin was impatiently waiting for his World History class to end. Professor Li was reminding the class about the paper that was due on Friday, but Justin wasn't really listening to that. Neither did his tension have anything to do with getting to his next class, since it wasn't for two hours. The object of his attention was, in fact, nothing to do with academics at all.

Rather, it was a girl. Her name was Rebecca Ingram, she went by Becky, had beautiful dark brown hair and brown eyes, and she sat two seats in front of him and three to the left. He'd heard her the other day, talking to her friend Srina about having broken up with her boyfriend, and bemoaning the apparent lack of available guys who weren't assholes who just wanted one thing. Well, Justin was a guy, and was available, and while he certainly was wanting that particular thing, it wasn't all he wanted. And I'm pretty sure I'm not an asshole, he thought with a bit of a smile.

And then people were standing up, and Justin blinked as he realized that he'd somehow managed to miss the end of what Professor Li was saying. Becky was already moving toward the door, and Justin hurriedly stood up, lifting his backpack by one strap and slinging it onto his shoulder, already in motion as it smacked into his back.

He threaded past a couple of slower-moving classmates and got through the door only a couple of moments after Alice. A moment later, he caught up with her in the hall and managed to touch her on the shoulder. "Becky. Have you got a moment?"

She stopped and turned, then looked up at Justin with her brown eyes and smiled. "Sure. What's up?"

Even with her smiling at him - okay, especially with her smiling at him, Justin stammered a little. "Well, uh... I was just wondering if you'd like to do something non-class-related with me at some point. A movie, coffee, dinner...?" He trailed off, feeling extremely awkward, but somehow she was still smiling at him, and even nodding.

"That'd be -" she started, and then broke off suddenly, her eyes moving to something behind Justin.

"There you are!" He turned in surprise at Alex's voice, and then blinked as he took her in, an involuntary Wow going through his mind. She was wearing a white dress with small blue flowers on it, with slightly poofy shoulders and a skirt that stood out in folds, coming down to just above her knees. White stockings were under that, and even a single white feather in her hair. "I thought Ricky might like to have lunch with Daddy," Alex was continuing. "And I know I would." She stopped next to Justin, standing about as close as she possibly could without actually leaning against him, her head tilted just a little to the side and a slight smile on her face as she looked at him.

He was still trying to process this when Alex turned her attention to Becky. "Hi," she said, shifting Ricky a little to free her right hand, then pushing the diaper bag that was on that shoulder back with her elbow before extending the hand to the other girl. "I'm Alex Russo. It's nice to meet you."

Becky didn't take the offered hand. She didn't speak. She simply looked at Alex for about half a second, her eyes a shade wider than normal, her mouth open. Suddenly realizing what she must be thinking, Justin opened his mouth, trying to say something, anything, to let her know that the conclusion she must be reaching was not true. "Um, uh. You -"

And that was as far as he got. Becky turned her gaze on him, swiveling her head so quickly you could practically hear a snap, and Justin got the fleeting impression of a look of fury on her face, and the next thing he knew, he was on the floor curling up around the throbbing stream of pain that was radiating from the space between his thighs. His mouth was still gamely attempting to explain things, although the only audible result was a very quite sound that would have to be spelled something like 'aaaiiiiiiiiiiiaaaaaaiiiiiiiiiiiii'.

A few minutes later, once Justin was able to stand, make coherent speech, and walk, Alex was shepherding him into the women's bathroom, having first gone inside and made sure it was empty. He walked awkwardly over to the counter that held the bathroom's three sinks, then leaned forward and placed both hands flat on it, arms stiff to support his weight as he bent his head down and let out a low ohhh sound.

Alex watched him out of the corner of her eye as she unslung the diaper bag, unzipped it with one hand, pulled out a cream-colored blankie decorated with little cartoon ducks, then laid Ricky carefully onto it.

Standing back up, she turned and looked at Justin in the mirror. "Okay, pants down. Let's see how bad the damage is."

Justin's head jerked back upright and he looked back at her in the mirror. "What?"

"You heard me, mister," she said, adopting the same tone their mother used when she was not going to take any arguments. "Unless you're a whole lot more flexible than I think you are, there's no way you can get a good look at everything. So drop your pants and turn around."

In the mirror, Justin's expression had become a disbelieving stare. "Uh..." He grimaced, then shook his head, continuing in strained tones. "Alex, I - ahhh - really don't -"

Stepping forward, Alex put her right hand on his upper arm. "Stop. Listen to yourself. You can't even get half a sentence out. So quit arguing about it. Besides, Ricky isn't going to tolerate being set down while he's awake for long, so we need to hurry this up."

She applied pressure, pulling on his arm to get him to turn around, and Justin followed even as he continued to argue. "But - aiii - " Alex pushed firmly against his chest, and he had to lean back against the counter, his eyes closing in pain as he did.

It took only a moment for Alex to undo Justin's belt, unbutton and unzip his pants, and then pull down. Automatically, Justin moved a hand in front of his crotch, even covered as it was in his boxers, and Alex rolled her eyes again and moved it back out of the way. "Look. I'm opening Ricky's diaper and cleaning his thing practically a dozen times a day. It's not like you're showing me anything I haven't seen before."

Even as she said that, she squatted down in front of him, put her hands on the waistband of his boxers, and pulled down. Justin gritted his teeth and tilted his head back, locking his eyes onto the ceiling, doing his best to not see Alex down in front of him like that. Well, she's seen it now. Can't exactly make her unsee it, he thought. And she's right. It does need to be looked at, and the medical center is halfway across campus. We can't exactly ask some random stranger to check me out. So just grit your teeth and try not to look at her or think of anything -

And then Justin jumped a little as his train of thought completely derailed. "What are you doing?!" he got out, although it was very fast and somewhat squeaky, more along the lines of "WatreyudoING?"

"I need to make sure your equipment didn't get crushed. I can't exactly do that without touching anything."

Justin's eyes were wide now, his face reddening quickly, and it felt like his heart was hammering at about four hundred beats per second. He put his hands on the counter to either side of him, suddenly afraid that his knees might buckle, and tried as hard as he could to think of things that were not sexy at all. Baseball. They always say to think about baseball. Unfortunately, for Justin, the thought of baseball immediately brought to mind Kari Snodgrass, the baseball-crazy blonde he'd briefly tried to date in high school. The extremely cute baseball-crazy blonde, and -

And then there was a gasp and a shocked Oh of surprise, and Justin pulled his gaze from the ceiling to see two girls, one of whom had her eyes wide open and her hand to her mouth, while the other was smirking. Then he looked down, to see that Alex had not noticed at all, and was still inspecting him, her head close to his crotch, and in such a position that from the two girls' vantage -

"This, uh - ahhh - this isn't what it - aiiiii -"

The one girl's smirk grew. "Oh, well, in that case -"

At this point Alex, realizing someone else was now there, pulled back a little and turned her head to look as well. She blushed hotly (which would have surprised Justin, had he been in a position to see it), and then said the first thing that came into her head. Unfortunately, that was "It's okay - we have a baby!" As she said this, she gestured toward Ricky, who chose that moment to begin fussing.

The smirking girl broke out into actual laughter at that. "I get it! You're doing this so you don't have another, huh?!"

"Yasondra!" the more embarrassed of the pair let out in a completely scandalized tone. She was also grabbing the laughing girl's arm at this point, trying to drag her backwards while casting an oddly apologetic look at Justin and Alex. The two of them disappeared around the corner, and Alex sat looking that way for a moment, and then brought a hand up and clapped it hard onto her mouth. Her body started to shake a little, and Justin rolled his eyes and sighed.

"Go ahead, laugh. We both know you want to," he said, reaching down and tucking himself in, then zipping up his pants hurriedly - though not without a slight wince. Alex shook her head, keeping her hand on her mouth for another couple of seconds, while Justin moved over to Ricky with exaggerated care, then picked him up.

Before he even had Ricky lifted all the way up, though, Alex was there. "You're hurt. I'll get him. You just... I guess go outside and wait. We'll be out in just a minute."

"Oh...kay." Justin gave Alex a curious look, which she didn't notice, as she was checking Ricky's diaper. "Uh... I take it things felt okay?"

"Hmm?" Alex looked up at Justin, but too late to catch the look he'd been giving her. "Oh, right. Yeah, it all felt good." She blushed slightly immediately after saying that, surprising Justin. "I mean, your equipment is good - uh..."

"I get it," Justin replied, suppressing a smile at actually seeing Alex a little flustered. "I'll see you in a minute."

The two girls from before were nowhere in evidence, a fact for which Justin was quite grateful. He tried to squat down to sit on the floor, then stopped with a gasp as the motion tightened his jeans on his crotch. Slowly, he stood back up all the way, then turned and leaned against the wall, taking a few slow, deep breaths here where Alex wasn't watching.

Well, that went great. Is there any other way today can get screwed up? That's just a rhetorical question, God. You don't have to show me that there is. The throbbing pain was slowly receding and, after checking to make sure no one was in the hallway, Justin took a moment to do his own inspection. Touching things was painful, but it did indeed seem that nothing was actually ruptured or crushed, just bruised. Well, nothing was crushed except his hopes of getting Becky to go out with him. Doubt she'll even let me try to explain, after that. And I wouldn't be surprised if she tells other girls all about how I was hitting on her when I'm married and have a baby. Crap.

He squeezed the bridge of his nose, then massaged it lightly. He'd have to find some other way to get a date. And soon. Even in pain as he was, he'd felt things stirring a bit when Alex had touched him, and... And that was a thought that Justin was not going to continue with. He let out a slow sigh just as she emerged from the bathroom, carrying a calmed Ricky.

"So, what was that about anyway? I mean, I can understand someone enjoying inflicting pain on you, but that's kind of a more personal way to go about it." Alex took his right hand in her left as she spoke and started down the hallway, Justin following automatically.

"It - " Justin felt a sudden surge of anger, fueled by pain and disappointment, and he stopped, pulling his hand out of Alex's. "Gee, I don't know. I had just asked her out," he ground out, "when someone walked up carrying my son and introducing herself with the same last name as mine. It's only a guess, but I think she might have gotten the impression that that person was my wife."

Alex's eyes opened wide, and her hand went up to her mouth. "Oh. Oh, wow. So she thought you were married with a new baby, and hitting on her... she must think you're total slime."

"You think so? I don't know Alex, maybe you should go find her and ask her. I mean, maybe she just accidentally kneed me and stormed off. Or, you know, maybe she spotted a mosquito on my pants, killed it, and then had to immediately run off. We could go back down to the the room and see if maybe she's come back to explain how it's all just a misunderstanding."

The first thing that popped into Alex's head was 'Well, sure, if that's what you want to do. You're the one on a schedule, after all.' But she saw the look on Justin's face, the anger and frustration there, and Alex Russo bit her tongue for a moment, swallowed the impulse and instead stepped forward and put her left arm around him, hugging him as well as she could with Ricky in her other arm. "I'm so sorry. Justin... I..."

I didn't mean to do that was what Alex wanted to say. But she realized then that she had meant to. She'd come into the hallway, seen Justin talking to that girl, heard him ask her out. And I was jealous. I was jealous of her, because -

"I'm sorry," she said again, trying to gain time, and then she swallowed hard and turned her head away from Justin, squeezing her eyes hard shut. "If... if you want, I'll go find her and explain. I'm sure once she knows I'm not your wife, she'll..." She stopped then, forced to by the sudden lump in her throat. How the hell am I going to do that? Especially hauling Ricky around with me? I guess I'll have to -

"No. No, you don't have to do that. I'm sorry I snapped at you. I..." He shook his head. "I shouldn't be worrying about this anyway. It's not like I've got time to go on dates right now, with Ricky and school and work. Just let it go."

Alex opened her eyes, surprised, then turned to look at Justin again. "Are you sure? I really will -"

"I'm sure," Justin answered, and gave her a squeeze around the waist. "Now let's go get lunch, okay?"

"Okay," Alex said, doing her best to hold back the smile she was feeling, lest Justin ask what she was smiling about.