Hi there everyone! :)
Well, I got given the privilege and pleasure of writing the very first Authors Note for Edge of Glory. This is foraworldundeserving, but you can call me Sarah :) next chapter, it'll be SquirrelzAttack writing this and we'll alternate our way through the story in this way.
So, about a week ago I approached Angela with the idea of doing a collaborative story and she loved it instantly ... and then we went crazy with ideas and stuff, as we do. Of course, in writing a collab, there's a whole lot more to sort out than when writing a story alone. On top of plot, dialogue and layout (and we argued over our layouts, trust me!), there's meshing it together, double editing, who writes what, making all of our ideas work together... you get the idea. But there's nobody else I'd rather write this with - J.K. Rowling and other famous authors excepted of course ;)
Now, this is how it's going to work. I (foraworldundeserving) am Kurt. Angela (SquirrelzAttack) is Blaine. The layout for most chapters will be that it is split into two parts, roughly half Kurt, half Blaine, and we'll each write our respective part and then put the two together. However, on the occasion when there's a lot of dialogue between Kurt and Blaine - like this chapter for one - we'll basically role-play it out to get the dialogue (think Cyberflirtations which, if you haven't read it, can be found on my page).
We'll be updating whenever we get the time to work together and get chapters done. Angela's going away soon and I'm moving back to Australia, so we're both fairly busy, with our own stories on top of that. But this will be seen through right to the end, we both solemnly swear! And this story can be found on both of our accounts. It should be updated at the same time when it is, but you never know what might happen. So if you follow one of us and there's a long gap between updating, check the page of the other :)
There is a language warning, but it will only be found in Blaine's POV. That said, there's a fair bit in this chapter so fair warning.
If you've come from my page, welcome :) if you like what you've read here, please go check out Angela's stories. If you're one of Angela's readers, it's nice to meet you (hypothetically) and I hope you enjoy the twist I bring to her work.
DISCLAIMER: This covers every chapter in this story so won't be repeated. All of our work is our own, and while we may be influenced by other stories we read, we don't steal work or ideas. We also don't own Glee, Kurt, Blaine, and, to our dismay, neither Telly Leung or Riker Lynch. The only thing we own is our combined craziness that made this.
It was the middle of exams and everybody was completely exhausted.
The Warblers milled around the choir room, taking advantage of Wes's unusual absence to chat, relax and sleep. The previous week had been jam-packed, with exams every day for nearly every boy. It had even gotten to the point where Wes had cancelled practice for the week, to the absolute shock of everybody. According to David, the last time a practice had been cancelled under Wes's reign was when he had been in hospital with a broken arm, but nobody was looking a gift horse in the mouth.
Unfortunately, he hadn't been so relaxed this week and practice was on to the dismay of most. Even though there were only a few exams, all of the students still had papers due on top of studying and keeping up with new work that some of their teachers were already introducing. And it was certainly taking its toll.
Kurt stifled a yawn as he examined the room. He had come from public school, for crying out loud! Being thrown head first into a new school environment where the work was suddenly much harder and teachers actually cared if homework was turned in, meant Kurt was feeling the pressure. On top of the fact that he was missing his McKinley friends like crazy - they were busy preparing for Nationals so Kurt didn't get much time to see them either - meant that Kurt was struggling to keep everything together. At times he felt like a rubber band being stretched far too tight, any further and he was liable to snap.
Luckily he had Blaine. Even though the two hadn't seen each other very much over the past few weeks - Blaine being just as busy as him - Kurt knew his boyfriend was at least always around, and could easily drop everything if Kurt needed him to. Speaking of which -
Blaine collapsed into the couch next to him, leaning over to kiss him quickly before slumping back. "I think I could easily sleep for a week." He tipped his head back, resting it against the back of the couch and Kurt chuckled.
"Same here. So, does that mean you're too tired to take me out to dinner tomorrow night?"
Blaine's smile froze in place. "Aw, crap. Kurt, I'm so sorry, but I have some charity work that I'm doing for the orphanage tomorrow night."
Kurt felt his own smile drop a little. "Orphanage? Since when?"
"For about a month now." Blaine looked away guiltily. "I'm sorry. Can I take you out the next night?"
Kurt could see that Blaine was genuinely apologetic, but he couldn't help the irritation that rose. "That's Friday, Blaine. You know my family does Friday night dinners. And you weren't at the orphanage last Thursday or anything." He knew they had been full-on busy with exams that week, but for some reason Kurt couldn't bring himself to care. He wanted Blaine to explain.
Blaine shifted uncomfortably in his seat. "Well, the exact day changes every week. Last week it was Saturday. I don't get to choose the date." He looked pleadingly at Kurt. "Can we reschedule for sometime this weekend?"
Kurt sighed. "Well, I suppose," he snarked back, well aware of how childish he was acting. "As long as that doesn't interfere with your busy schedule or anything. I'm used to waiting."
The second the words were out of his mouth, he regretted them. What are you doing? You both agreed not to bring up the past against each other! But Kurt didn't apologize, simply waiting to see how Blaine would respond.
"Kurt." Blaine sighed. "I'm not trying to upset you, and I'm not trying to keep you waiting either. But I made a promise, and I keep my promises."
Kurt could see Blaine's 'keeping the peace' look and knew his boyfriend was starting to get irritated too. Without really knowing why, Kurt began to bait him. "Of course you do, Blaine. You wouldn't do anything less, would you? Hey, what was that you said to me when you finally got your act together and asked me out? Something about Kurt, I promise to do whatever I can to make you happy? Well, Blaine, being rescheduled like an unimportant meeting is not making me happy."
This is stupid! He berated himself inwardly. Why are you trying to hurt him? You love him! But Kurt had been on a tipping point for awhile now, he was just so frustrated with exams and missing his McKinley friends. He needed some way to vent his feelings, and unfortunately his boyfriend had been the one to do it.
Blaine's mouth fell open at his boyfriend's accusation. "Kurt, that's ridiculous! I don't think you're unimportant. You're the most important thing in my life right now. It's just that, with finals and everything, I have a busy schedule. And so do you! Don't blow this out of proportion. I love you. I thought I made that pretty clear when you stayed in my dorm the other night."
Kurt looked around quickly to make sure nobody was paying attention. "You can't just say stuff like that, idiot. People are going to get the wrong idea about us. And, excuse me, blowing it out of proportion? I wasn't aware I wasn't allowed to express my feelings now, Mr. Kurt-you-can-tell-me-anything-and-I-won't-judge-you."
"I'm not judging you!" Blaine said indignantly, frowning. "And I never said you're not allowed to express your feelings! It's just that sometimes you take things the wrong way. Like right now for instance."
The rational side of Kurt's brain was shouting at him to back down and agree, because Blaine was right after all and Kurt knew it. But instead he narrowed his eyes and shot Blaine his best glare, the one usually reserved for Finn when he put his foot in it. "Oh, and how am I meant to take it, Blaine? You're rejecting me right now, thank you very much!"
Kurt knew his voice had raised and a few Warblers were looking their way curiously, but before he could do anything about it, Blaine was responding.
"I'm not rejecting you, I love you! Why don't you understand that?" Blaine insisted, his voice rising slightly. He took a deep breath, clearly trying to keep his temper in check. "Stop taking everything I say and twisting it around!"
"Excuse me, I'm not the one at fault here! Why are you getting pissed at me, when all I wanted was for us to spend some time together? That makes me such a terrible boyfriend, doesn't it?" Kurt rolled his eyes, squashing down the feeling that told him to stop. Nobody was going to tell Kurt Hummel what to do, not even himself!
He was dimly aware of the sound of a gavel banging, and knew Wes must have finally arrived. Kurt briefly toyed with the idea of telling Wes exactly where he could stick his gavel, then ignored it, continuing to glare at a frustrated Blaine.
"I never said you were a terrible boyfriend!" Blaine shot back angrily. "I want to spend time with you too! Dammit Kurt, you're only hearing what you want to hear. Nothing I am saying appears to penetrating your skull. Why? Why are you insisting that we fight? Why can't you just accept the fact that we have conflicting schedules right now, and leave it at that?"
Kurt raised his eyebrow, knowing perfectly well it would only set Blaine off further. "You think I want to hear this, do you? You think I want to hear you screaming at me in front of everybody and telling me I'm stupid? And it takes two to fight, Blaine, just in case you haven't noticed. You're not exactly not fighting with me, are you? And I've accepted we have conflicting schedules for a long time now, Blaine. It seems like any time I want to spend time together, you're busy. But whenever you want to go on a date or make out or whatever, guess who's always there? Sometimes it's like I'm the only one who cares enough about this relationship to put any effort in!"
"How can you say that?" Blaine retorted, his mouth in a set line. "How can you even suggest that I don't care about our relationship? What about the multiple times you've called me in the middle of the freaking night because of a nightmare? How about when I ditched school and drove two and a half hours to help you confront that bitch Karofsky? Kurt, I have put you first in a lot of things during the time we've known each other. You know that. All I'm asking for is this one time where I can go and follow up on a promise I made. To an orphanage no less. I'm not going to blow those kids off because you're having issues!"
"Issues?" Kurt's voice had risen to the point where he was nearly shouting and his fists were clenching together. "You'd better not be saying that the things I've gone through aren't important. At least I've been honest about what's going on with me, Blaine. I tell you everything. You, on the other hand, I don't even find out the things like you working at an orphanage? What else are you not telling me, huh? What other interesting things am I going to find out the next time you blow me off for a date and I'm stuck here wondering where the hell my boyfriend is this time? You're a people pleaser, I get that, but you said I'd always come first."
Wow, bitch much? Kurt felt himself cooling off a little as he finished his rant, realizing just what he had said to Blaine over the course of their conversation. He was about to suggest they back down, maybe take some time apart before talking about things further, before it all blew up in his face.
"I'm not suggesting anything you've gone through isn't important!" Kurt could see the look on Blaine's face and knew he was losing his temper fast. "Why would I have even bothered to help you through those things if, god forbid, I thought they weren't important? And how could you even insinuate that I'm not honest with you? I've told you things that even Wes and David don't know about me!" His hazel eyes narrowed angrily. "Stop making yourself out as the only victim here. You could try being a little selfless once in a while!"
That did it.
Kurt found himself on his feet before realizing he had moved, glaring down at his surprised boyfriend. "That's it! You listen here, Anderson, I've had it with your crap! I refuse to sit here and let you tell me I should be selfless! After everything I went through, after I stayed silent for so long when someone wanted to kill me," he heard gasps from the other occupants of the room but his ire was firmly focused on Blaine, "and only came here because my Dad pretty much insisted on it. After I sat there consoling you through the Rachel and Jeremiah fiascos and waited, just waited, for you to hopefully change your mind, and now you dare to tell me I'm selfish!"
He felt the tears building in his eyes and cursed his oversensitive tear ducts. Kurt was a crier - no matter what the emotion was, if it got too strong then he couldn't stop the tears from coming. "Well, I've got news for you, maybe it's time I should be selfish! Because you are being a petulant bitch right now and I'm starting to wonder why I ever settled for you, let alone waited for you. I thought you knew me, Blaine, I guess I was wrong after all."
Grabbing his bag, Kurt shouldered it and directed one last comment at the boy. "So, thanks so very much for this lovely conversation." The sarcasm was dripping off his words as the tears began to fall. "But I think I'll be on my way to find someone better to talk to."
And with that, Kurt turned and walked out of the room, refusing to look at any of the other Warblers. He knew he looked a sight - his face red, tears streaming down his cheeks and glaring at anything and everything. Jeff reached out as if to stop him but Kurt brushed his arm away, walking out the door.
Kurt.
Kurt strode down the hallway, ignoring the startled faces of students he passed. A teacher tried to stop him and he literally growled, causing the teacher to step back rather hurriedly. But it seemed to work, and his path cleared quickly.
Statements from their fight continued to play through in his head. Take things the wrong way... you're having issues... only one who cares about this relationship... try being a little selfless... wonder why I ever settled for you... find someone better...
The enormity of what had truly happened hit Kurt as he was halfway across the grounds, the shock sinking him to his knees on the damp ground.
"I just broke up with Blaine," he whispered. And with those words, all the fire left him to be replaced with an aching numbness and a gaping hole in his chest where he had just reached in and ripped out his own heart.
Kurt began to sob, completely losing control of his emotions. He was in plain sight - anybody could walk by on the street and see him here, but that was the last thing on Kurt's mind as it caught up with his emotions, with only one question left for him to consider.
"Oh my god, what the hell have I done?"
Blaine.
Blaine didn't even realize he was on his feet until he was halfway to the door. "Kurt! KURT!"
He had half a mind to follow the diva countertenor, but the logical part of his brain stopped his feet. What the hell had just happened?
"DAMMIT!" He yelled, forgetting that he was in a room full of Warblers. "God dammit. Fuck! This is total crap! Ugh! Fuck!"
Without thinking, Blaine swung around and slammed his fist into the wall, making the thin material shake. There was a dent where his fist had collided with it, but really, he just didn't give a crap right now. He pulled back and smashed his fist into the wall again. The skin on his knuckles scraped off and started to bleed, but he didn't feel the pain.
Kurt just broke up with me. The words kept flashing through Blaine's mind, etching themselves into his memory. Kurt just broke up with me. Tears formed in his eyes. He leaned forward and pressed his forehead against the wall, trying not to start sobbing
"Shit." He muttered through his gritted teeth.
"SHIT!" His scream echoed through the room, and he once again hit the wall, pounding it with unnecessary force, tears now beginning to course down his cheeks.
Blaine turned back around to find all of the Warblers frozen in place, all staring at him incredulously. No one had ever seen him completely lose control. He was Blaine Anderson, the calm, collected, smooth, suave, dapper soloist who was always pleasant and never got into a fight with anybody. Now here he was, throwing punches at walls and crying in front of everybody. For some reason, the fact that they were all just staring at him like big dopes infuriated him even more.
"What the fuck are you all staring at?" Blaine shouted angrily, completely letting his temper go. Not waiting for a response, he strode out and slammed the door behind him, still fuming.
Kurt just broke up with me.
This wasn't real. It couldn't be real.
"Oh god…" Blaine muttered, his face in his hands. It was all so damn confusing. The realization of what had happened and what it meant really sank in, filling him up with dread. He didn't know what to do. All he knew was that Kurt had broken up with him, and it really, really sucked.
Well, I hope you've enjoyed it! :) I'll see you all again in Chapter Three.
Love Sarah