-Durarara! (Genderbent Ver.)

-Somewhat Shizaya? If you're into that sort of thing... and by that sort of thing I mean Izaya pulling hair... and being a creeper...

Cut

"Nee! Nee! Shizuko-kun!" Shinra chirped loudly. She had always been quite boisterous, a constant source of noise in Shizuko's life. They had been good friends in grade school before Shinra left for a different Junior High. Then , when their high schools combined, they met again and had been fairly close ever since.

"What…?" she asked with a deadpan expression. Even though this was her neutral look, people often mistook it for anger. Shinra on the other hand, had always been a little off, and she had bounded right up to Shizuko even when everyone else was terrified of her.

"Nee, Shizuko-kun, why do you keep cutting all of your pretty hair off? You never wear it long anymore!" she pointed out. A flash of anger flashed across Shizuko's face, not directed toward Shinra herself, but anyone in their right mind would have put a few more steps between them… once again, Shinra wasn't exactly normal.

It was true, though. Every time Shizuko had let her hair grow out to even her shoulders, it would seem to disappear almost immediately. Back in the first couple of years of high school she had kept it long almost all the time. It was naturally a little wavy, and combining that with the blonde color she always liked to add to it, her hair had been the envy of girls everywhere. She loved her hair.

However, something had changed about halfway through their final year… Just thinking back on it, brought her nothing but rage.

It had been just after gym class when the girls had finished changing and were heading back to their homeroom. Shizuko didn't really have any friends beside Shinra and Kadota-san since everyone was too scared to talk to her. She was fairly tall for a girl and extremely intimidating. Today was no different. She walked back to her room in silence, apart from the rest of the group.

Instead of talking to anyone, she chose to glance out the school window. She noticed that a few punk girls (and even a couple of tough-looking guys) had crowded around the front gates. She frowned, realizing that the flea had probably been spreading rumors about her again. She would have to fight again after school…

Sighing, she turned back to the hallway, attempting to continue on when all of a sudden, her vision went dark and she stumbled back.

"Wha…?" she muttered, blinking a little bit as light started to come back to her. She hadn't felt anything, but obviously someone had hit her hard enough to knock her back. She heard her classmates gasping and running off, but she still couldn't see well enough to determine the cause of their distress.

She felt something being wrapped around her, binding her arms, so she looked down and vaguely made out the duct tape. Shizuko could easily break out of the bindings if she pleased, but she was still too confused and disoriented as she was shoved down onto the floor. As she sat there, trying to discern what was happening, a very familiar, very annoying voice filled her ears.

Looking up, she finally found the flea. She was laughing, holding a baseball bat in one hand and the roll of duct tape in the other.

"Hello, Shizu-chan~" she crooned sarcastically. The sound her voice sent Shizuko into a rage. "Comfortable?"

"Flea!"

She snickered, letting the bat hit the floor with a rattle and tossing the tape with it. Reaching into her shirt, she pulled out her much loved flick blade.

"You're always so loud!" she teased. "You're going to get us caught~"

"Don't care!"

"Aww~ No fun!"

"Let me go, flea!"

"Still can't think to save your life."

"What's that supposed to mean!"

"Protozoan."

"Arrrgh!"

The banter went on for a few minutes as always, Shizuko forgetting her own strength as Izaya tormented her.

There was only one person in the entire world that could actually get under Shizuko's skin that much and that just so happened to be the girl that now began to circle around her like a vulture. No matter how much she hated violence, no matter how much she hated being angry, she just couldn't help herself around this girl. She was infuriating and annoying and her face made Shizuko just want to punch things for no reason; preferably her face.

Izaya stopped circling, standing behind her as she held the knife carefully and ignoring whatever comments Shizuko was currently making.

"You know, Shizu-chan~ You have such pretty hair…" she said eyeing it. "I kinda want it."

"You have your own damn hair, flea!"

It was true, obviously. Izaya's hair was almost as nice as Shizuko's but even just that little difference made Izaya bitter.

"But I want yours." She grabbed a fistful of Shizuko's hair, tugging it up harshly with her free hand.

"What the hell!" she yelped in pain, eyes watering. She was immune to a lot of pain, but hair pulling was a bit of an exception.

Then she felt it… the back and forth sawing of a blade in her hair. She felt the tug get smaller and smaller as her hair fell back to her head, much lighter than it had been previously. Her eyes widened in shock, another fistful of hair falling victim to the flea's knife.

"IZAYA!"

Before she even knew it, most of her hair was already gone.

Finally snapping, the tape nearly exploding off of her, she shot up and whipped around to grab Izaya. She wasn't there anymore… Shizuko barely caught sight of her black hair flicking around the corner.

Looking down, she stared at the massive amount of blonde hair on the floor, reaching back to touch what was left on her head.

It was gone. Izaya had only left a few inches in all directions, leaving her with a choppy boy's cut.

Shrieking in rage just as a teacher came running down the hall to see what was happening, she nearly punched a hole in the wall. Izaya was already too far ahead however. Knowing she wouldn't be able to catch her at this point, Shizuko turned around and stomped back to class, ignoring the worried, and slightly frightened, teacher.

The student body had panicked after seeing her hair gone but that's not what had mattered to Shizuko. She had liked her long hair, but she really hadn't cared that everyone else did too. She hadn't even seen Izaya for weeks after that, figuring that she was waiting for everything to calm down before showing her ugly face again.

"And? What's your point, Shinra?" she growled.

"Well, it was always so beautiful! Why won't you let it get long again?"

"Because every time I try to grow it out, that damn flea cuts it all off again…"

OMAKE!

"Ahh~" Izaya sighed happily, holding the long tuft of blonde hair up to her cheek, nuzzling it gently. "Such soft hair…"

Namie looked up at her with a sickened expression, wondering why he even worked for the obsessive little girl. Quickly deciding that it was, once again, too much, he went back to filing the numerous folders of information, ignoring the girly sighs and moans that Izaya was making as she fawned over the hair again. He didn't know for sure who the owner of the hair was, but he had a pretty good idea.

There was already a drawer full of blonde hair in her desk, each separate tuft tied together with a black ribbon and labeled by year. The first of which was the longest…

Izaya sighed again, happily content with her collection.

Okay, so I was looking through my MASSIVE folder of Durarara! images and I came across a picture of Fem!Shizuo and Fem!Izaya where Izaya had her all tied up and was cutting off all her hair with scissors and I just HAD to write something with it. This idea makes me laugh so hard~

Why?

Because Izaya would TOTALLY do it if they really had been girls~

But wait... is this my first completed Durarara! fanfiction? Why yes, I think it is!

-DiGi