Fandom: Fairy Tail

Rating: K

Pairing: Maybe a dash of Jeral/Erza. A smidgen of Natsu & Erza friendship.

Summary: Erza needs some answers to fill up the void that he left, and Mystogan appears to be the only one that has any.

Disclaimer: Anything that you recognise does not belong to me. And anything that you don't recognise probably doesn't belong to me either.

Note: Takes place after the Fighting Festival arc. Some spoilers for the Edolas arc.

Hurry up, hurry up, hurry up.

Mystogan tapped his foot impatiently, quickly surveying the area before returning his focus to Master Makarov.

"… and that's fifty thousand jewels! Would you like me to re-count—"

"It's okay."

"Are you sure? It's always better to double-check, you know."

"Don't worry about it," Mystogan assured. "Thanks."

He quickly turned on his heel and practically sprinted out of Master's office, making a beeline to the stairs that led to the roof.

Thank God. Mystogan breathed a sigh of relief. Freedom. For a moment, he had been afraid that Natsu or Erza would have—

"Mystogan?"

Spoken too soon. Mystogan winced, recognising the voice that had called out his name and turned around slowly to see a very hesitant-looking Erza Scarlet.

She must have come to the rooftop for some peace and quiet, he thought, noticing the book she in her hand that she placed beside her before standing up.

"Don't—" she began harshly, seeing his hand move up to cast a sleep spell on her. "I just… I just want to talk."

She took a step towards him, and Mystogan quickly took a step back instinctively.

"I told you, I'm not who you think I am," he insisted. "You have to believe me."

"I don't quite know what to believe anymore," she said softly, her tone a stark contrast to the one she had initially taken with him. She took a few more steps towards him.

Mystogan froze as she approached him. His mind was telling him to run; knock Erza out and make his escape, but somehow the sad and confused look on her face was… something he had never seen before on the usually strong, stoic knight.

Before he knew it, Erza's hand was hovering over his face and, after a moment's hesitation, she slowly pulled down his mask.

She gasped. They were identical, right down to the last stroke of their facial tattoos.

"Who are you?" she whispered.

"Somebody," he replied quickly. "Nobody. I'm not him."

"Not who?"

"Not who you think I am."

"Please," Erza said, almost begging. "You don't understand—"

"Don't," Mystogan began, averting his gaze from her face, and then glancing back. The look on her face was heartbreaking. "Don't look at me like that. This is exactly why I wear a mask all the time. So you wouldn't have to see this face again."

"Then you know," she said, a bit more confidently. "You know who I think you are, and you know the history of me and—me and that person. Which is why you know why I have to know who you are. Please, Mystogan. I—You can't… you can't not tell me if you know."

"Listen, Erza, I'm sorry, but I can't—"

"You don't understand," she interrupted, her voice breaking. "You don't understand, he was—he was everything." She said it like that was all he needed to know to comprehend the gravity of the situation.

When Mystogan did nothing but look at her sadly, Erza continued, "He was everything to me. Everything and the only thing—the only person—that I—that I believed in, you know? I had so much faith in him, it was blinding. And then—and then I see him again, and everything's different and so, so messed up, and—and you're supposed to be dead, but you're standing here, and you're alive! You're so alive, and yet you're not attacking me, and you're not evil, and I just. I don't know anything anymore."

By this point, Erza was crying already, and Mystogan cursed what ever made him think the roof was always a safe escape route in the first place. He hated it when girls cried, especially Erza, because Erza was supposed to be strong, she was supposed to be composed and she was supposed to hold everything together, and, of all the Earthland counterparts he could have had, he just had to be the jackass that broke her heart and almost killed her and her friends.

"I'm not him," Mystogan said simply, not knowing what else to say.

"I know," she whispered, nodding sadly. "Jeral's got a scar on his neck that we got when we were kids. You don't have it," she explained, pointing to the right side of Mystogan's neck.

"You seem to know a lot about him."

"I used to think that I knew everything about him," Erza replied, a sad, little sardonic, smile appearing on her lips. "I was wrong it seems."

"I'm sorry."

"Don't be. Why should you be?" She laughed bitterly, and Mystogan had to suppress a shudder; he did not want to spend any more time with Erza being this unhinged.

"For reminding you of him. I didn't mean to."

Her smile slipped; the make-shift armor she had temporary put up in her eyes faltered, and she looked like she was on the verge of spilling more tears.

"Who are you?" she probed. "The two of you are identical—every lock of hair, every feature, every nuance… but you're not him."

"I can't tell you, I'm sorry," Mystogan repeated.

"Please," Erza said, trying again. She was not going to let this go. "Nothing makes sense. I used to think I had things under control, but then one disaster after another happened, and I just feel so damn helpless, and I haven't felt like that since…"

Since that day in the Tower of Heaven.

"I gave him everything," she croaked, her voice breaking again. Her mouth felt like the desert. She licked her lips and swallowed, trying to continue, "and he still has a part of me, and ever since—every since that day, I've felt nothing but this… this aching emptiness, and I hate it, and God, it just—it just. It hurts. There's very little that I wouldn't do just to get rid of it, just to fill up the void for one moment. Just to feel what it's like to be whole again. You—you have to understand. I have to know."

"I can't, Erza, really—"

"But I loved him!" she blurted, as if that was the magic answer. Like that would have made understand. "I loved him, and he was everything to me—the only steady thing I was sure would never change, and then he just… he just turned into something that I didn't understand anymore."

She seemed to realise how uncomfortable she was making him, so she quickly looked away, trying to regain some composure, to act more like Erza Scarlet, the Titania, rather than Erza Scarlet, the helpless child.

Now was his chance, Mystogan thought. While she was distracted, he could make his escape, but…

She just looked so lost. He could not stop looking at her face, his feet frozen to the ground. He could not just leave her like this.

Too many people had already abandoned her as it was.

"Don't cry," he mumbled, awkwardly patting her on the shoulder. He really did not know how to act around crying girls. "Please don't cry—I'm sorry I can't tell you who I am. Really. I'm sure you'll find out one day, then you'll know. You'll know why I couldn't tell you, and everything will make sense. But now… is too soon. You'll just have to trust me. I know it's hard, especially after… everything, but just—just trust me, okay?"

Erza gazed at him for a moment, and Mystogan shifted uncomfortably, feeling very exposed without his mask on. He was vaguely aware of the fact that this was the first time in years that someone had seen him—truly seen him. There was a hint of familiarity that sparked in Erza's eyes; he thought it may have been because of who he resembled, when he realised that she was seeing him, Mystogan, instead of Jeral for the first time.

That she recognised her comrade.

But before she could say anything else, they were interrupted with Natsu bursting through the doors, exclaiming, "Erza! Erza! You've gotta come down to the hall now, you'll never guess what Gray—"

Erza blinked, rubbing the sleep from her eyes. Her whole body ached like she had just come out of a fight, but…

She lifted her head up slightly and saw Natsu's sleeping form a few feet away. Suddenly, the previous events had come back to her, explaining why she had ended up on the floor.

After searching for Mystogan around her, and not finding him, Erza pursed her lips and tried to keep the flow of tears back. Jeral or no Jeral, Mystogan had a knack for leaving her just as cold and just as horribly unsure of everything that his lookalike did.

Erza turned on her side, not wanting to move just yet. Things had just started to get better, as well, and then she had to go and see his face again in that church…

Enough of that, she chastised herself. Thinking negative thoughts like that was not going to make anything better. It would not bring him back.

Nothing would. Life had to go on.

But…

Life could go on a bit later. In another hour or so, maybe. Erza slowly got up on her knees and crawling over to Natsu. She laid down next to the younger boy and curled up against him, thinking of how nice and warm he was, just like Jeral used to be.

Natsu twitched in his sleep, his hand jerking out and coming into contact with Erza's stomach. Instead of waking up, the boy murmured nonsense and readjusted himself, draping his arm over Erza's and unconsciously moving closer to her.

Erza smiled, her vision blurry. She closed her eyes and pretended that the stone floor beneath them was sand, and that the Natsu's pink hair was blue, and that the only thing she needed to worry about was how to survive till the next day and nothing more. That she was a child again, when everything was so much harder, yet so much simpler at the same time. When everything, as twisted as it was, made some sort of sense.

Nothing made sense anymore.

Yes, Erza decided, smiling and leaning into Natsu's embrace, she could stay like this for just a little bit longer.

A/N:

First shot at Fairy Tail! Very pointless, but it's just a something small to get me started. God knows how much I adore Jeral/Erza, they are like the romantic train-wreck that I hope myself to never experience.

And yes, I do have myself a soft-sport for a bit of Natsu/Erza friendship.

Concrit would be very much appreciated :)