Dave had hated the song for as long as he could remember. His mother used to put on oldies CDs whenever she cleaned on the weekends and there was nothing quite like being awoken to the sound of The Temptations or Marvin Gaye at six o'clock in the morning on a Saturday to make you hate the whole genre in its entirety.
But that song especially Dave had formed a special hatred for. It just rubbed him the wrong way like some songs do. Any time it'd come on the radio while he was driving he'd turn the whole system off. And on those few special Saturdays while his mother was cleaning he'd bury his head under his pillow and resist the urge to scream as she sang along to its familiar melody.
It wasn't until him, Kurt Hummel, that Dave realized perhaps why he hated the song so much. Well, more like once he realized why his heart beat picked up whenever the fashionista breezed past him in the hallways without so much as a sideways glance. Or how he had a tendency to drop things or stumble over his words whenever Kurt would look his way, even if it was usually with a look of disapproval in his general direction.
It was really all Az's fault. As his best friend gave Dave a lift home from football practice one night, Az had the oldies station cranked up, it secretly being his favorite genre of music despite whatever he told the rest of the team. Dave cursed his luck as he had to listen to song after song after song, all sung along to by his supposed best friend.
"Man, can't we listen to something else? I'm tired of this shit," Dave said wearily after a Drifters classic gave way to The Righteous Brothers. Azimio gave him a scandalized look and Dave rolled his eyes, averting his gaze back to the window.
"Dude, you ain't got no fuckin' taste in music. Shut up and listen. You might feel somethin'," Az chuckled as he nudged Dave while leaning over to crank up the volume. Dave groaned and slouched further in his seat as the stupid song came on.
"Wooooah, my love. My darling. I've hungered for your touch. A long, lonely time." Azimio sang obnoxiously. "C'mon, dude, even if you hate the oldies, you gotta love this song. Everybody loves this song."
"Yeah, well, I don't," Dave said gruffly.
"Aw man, you just ain't listenin' to it, then. C'mon, really listen to the lyrics," Az encouraged. He stopped singing along so they could both take in the message.
And time goes by so slowly. And time can do so much. Are you still mine? I need your love.
Dave shifted uncomfortably in his seat and tried to banish any thoughts of Kurt Hummel from his mind. The song ended and they rode the rest of the way to Dave's house in silence. Az chuckled at Dave's scowl as he hopped out of the truck and stalked up his driveway.
Later that night Dave was not looking up the lyrics to a certain song from earlier while he had it playing on YouTube in the background.
He sat and stared at the lyrics, reading them over and over again. Sometime around one am he crashed into his bed, the song now playing on a loop in his head. He drifted off to sleep and dreamed of Kurt that night.
He dreamed of Kurt standing at the top of a cliff of some sort. He was standing outside a lighthouse and waving down at Dave. His hand seemed to beckon Dave forward, but he couldn't see any way to get up to where Kurt was. He looked around for anything, a ladder or a rope, but found none. He walked across the shoreline, looking for ways to scale the jagged precipice without any assistance but found none.
He tried anyway, grabbing at the rocks and scrambling to find footing. He was barefoot, he realized, as the sharp rocks scratched his feet and made him bleed. He didn't care though; he needed to get to Kurt who with each minute that Dave remained down by the water looked more and more upset.
His hands were crimsoned with blood as he tried to hold on, but eventually his strength gave way and he fell for what seemed like a long time until he hit the sand with a thud. He quickly stood back up and walked back a few paces to try and see Kurt again. He was still there, only now there was another with him; that dapper kid from that prissy academy. He slid up behind Kurt and enveloped him in a loving embrace. Kurt threw Dave a sad look before turning in the prissy guy's arms and resting his head against the other boy's chest.
Dave tried to yell, call to Kurt to tell him that it wasn't his fault. He had tried, but he couldn't get to him. However, his voice didn't seem to want to work. No sound would come out of him other than a wheezing breath. He watched the pair walk away, the door of the lighthouse opening to welcome them inside. They stepped into the foyer and disappeared from sight, Kurt not even glancing back as the door slammed shut.
The light from the rotating beacon went out and Dave woke up.
oOo
It was finals week and Dave was actually glad for them for once. Now that he'd gotten his grades back on track, he had a feeling he'd do pretty well, but more importantly, the summer would come and that would mean he wouldn't have to see Kurt. At least not every day. There was still the possibility of running into him elsewhere, but he'd cross that bridge when he got there.
He had chosen to take his studies to the Lima Bean since his parents were having company over that day and he really needed the time to study. He could have gone over to Az's he supposed, but things were a little shaky between them right now even if they weren't, Az wasn't very helpful to have around while you were trying to study.
Dave paid for another coffee and returned to his table. He put his History study guide away for the time being to get started on his major works data sheet for Macbeth. He was scribbling down the various symbols in the story and what they meant when he heard the bell over the door cling.
He lifted his head briefly to see who had answered and nearly spilled his coffee in his lap. He set the cup down shakily as he tried to scoot further into the shadows so that he wouldn't be seen as Kurt and that dapper kid walked in holding hands.
Kurt went over and grabbed them a table as that kid, what the hell was his name anyway? Bland? Something like that... Dave watched as Bland got their coffee order and joined him.
He wanted to pack up his books and leave, but he knew there was no way he could get out the door without being spotted by them. He'd have to wait for them to leave first. God, he hoped they just drank their coffee and left, but Kurt looked like he was getting comfortable.
Dave tried to focus on his work, but he kept catching snippets of their conversation. Something about New York and a competition. Singing on a Broadway stage. Broadway. Kurt wanted to go back to New York to be on Broadway. And that Bland kid was nodding his head furiously and saying something…he was saying he'd go with Kurt, just like they'd discussed.
Dave's heart plummeted to the bottom of his stomach. He knew that Kurt and that guy were dating, but he hadn't realized it was so…serious. That they were already making plans for together for after high school.
He felt tears sting his eyes as he realized that Blaine really was everything he could never be. He certainly wasn't chubby or sweaty and it would be a miracle if that kid ever ran out of hair. And more importantly, he was a performer just like Kurt who had big city dreams. Dave still didn't even know what he wanted to do with his life, not officially anyway. God, how stupid had he been to think he ever had a shot with Kurt? What had he been thinking?
And then, just when Dave thought the world couldn't possibly get any crueler, he heard it.
"I love you"
….
"I love you, too. You know when you stop and think about it… Kurt Hummel's had a pretty good year."
As he sat there, trying to keep the tears from falling onto his homework he tried to think of other things, but then the song playing overhead changed…
Ohhh my love. My darling. I've hungered, hungered for you touch. A long, lonely time…
Dave wanted to flip the table and flee from the establishment, maybe get in his truck and just drive until he couldn't feel anything anymore. Instead, he cursed under his breath, packed up his books, and bolted out of the coffee shop. He thought he heard his name being called after him, but he didn't turn to see who had said it. He just ran.
oOo
Dave approached school the next day as though nothing had happened. It was their last day and he just wanted to get through with it without incident so he could get on with his summer.
He was cleaning out his locker when a familiar form appeared next to his locker.
"What do you want, Santana?" Dave huffed as he shoved another notebook into his backpack.
"I need you to do me favor," she said in a bored tone.
"What?"
"I need you to walk Kurt to his classes today."
"What?" Dave said a little more loudly this time.
"Calm down, King Kong. I'll be finished with all my finals before lunch, so I'm gonna split with Britts, but Kurt needs someone to walk him to class. It's just one more day," she replied, rolling her eyes at him.
"No freaking way. You can hang around for a few hours, it won't kill you," Dave said, feeling himself getting dangerously close to hitting a locker.
"You're right, I guess I could hang around. Maybe I can find that Jacob kid and tell him all about how you plan on marching in a Pride parade this summer, hmm?" she shot back at him, pursing her lips and cocking and eyebrow.
"You're a bitch, you know that, right?" Dave said as he slammed his locker shut.
"Uh, duh. Got any other late breaking news you'd like to share with me? Like how we have a black president or that Sam's got a trouty mouth?"
"A trouty… Whatever. No, fine. God, I'll do it." Dave said wishing he hadn't resigned himself to be in such a shitty position in the first place.
"Great, thanks so much for your help, doll," Santana said in a mockingly sweet tone as she shoved his jacket, beret, and walkie talkie at him. Dave stared at the device and called after her retreating back, "Wait, why do I need this if you're not gonna be here?"
She didn't even turn around to face him, but called out, "Because it makes you look intimidating, sweetheart!"
Dave swore under his breath and set out to find Kurt.
He found the pale skinned boy outside his Algebra class talking to that girl Azimio had a crush on.
"Um, hey Kurt" he said awkwardly as he approached him. Kurt turned and flashed him a look he couldn't read. He whispered something to Mercedes and she gave Dave a small smile before walking away.
"Hello, David" Kurt greeted him icily.
"Uh, hey."
"You said that," Kurt pointed out. God, why was he being such a bitch? Dave thought angrily.
"Uhhh, right. Well, um, I'm here to walk you to class, so…" he trailed off.
"I see," Kurt said, his eyes scanning down to take in Dave's shiny Bully Whips jacket. "Well, we'd better get going, then."
They walked in silence, Dave checking over his shoulder every so often to make sure no one was approaching the pair with a slushie. No one seemed to be paying them any attention, though, as they were all busy exchanging phone number and hugs by lockers, some signing year books and talking loudly of their plans for the summer.
Dave led the way to Kurt's French class for the last time and couldn't help but feel a little sad for it.
"Well, uh, here we are. Good luck with your final and everything. I'll come get you after I'm done with my Calculus one." Dave started to walk away, but a hand on his shoulder stopped him.
He turned to find the hand belong to Kurt. He quickly drew his hand away, but continued to look at Dave as though he were examining him.
"What?" Dave spat. He really needed to get to class or else he'd miss his final.
"The first meeting for PFLAG is today after school. You're coming, right?"
"Aw shit, we're still doing that?" Dave asked exasperatedly.
"Yes, David, we're still doing that. I was serious about that. You need to be educated."
"I don't see why it matters…" Dave mumbled.
"Of course it matters. Why would it not matter?" Kurt asked in a scandalized tone.
"Because, I'll be alone no matter what I do, so why bother?" Dave answered gruffly. He hated admitting that, especially to Kurt, but it was true. He could either stay in the closet and barely have any real friends and definitely no significant other, one that wasn't a beard anyway, or he could come out and potentially lose all of his friends and still be left with no chance for a boyfriend, because the only two other gay guys he knew were both taken. By each other.
Kurt started at Dave for a minute, clearly trying to think of a stinging counterpoint. It was clear he hadn't been expecting that answer out of Dave.
"Listen Dave, I'm tired" he relented. "I was up almost all night last night, I forgot to do my nightly moisturizing routine, and I still don't know if I have a boyfriend anymore or not, so could you please, for lack of a better term, cut the shit and just say you'll go?" Kurt pleaded.
Now it was Dave's turn to scramble to words. Did he just say that he and that Bland kid split up? How was that possible? They had just been exchanging "I love yous" the other day and now… But when Dave thought about it, there had been something in Kurt's voice that sounded… disappointed? Unsure? Whatever it was, it didn't sound good to Dave, but he'd brushed it away, certain that night as he'd cried himself to sleep that Kurt and Bland would leave Lima and head for the big lights together and he'd end up a Lima loser who probably worked at a gas station or Wal-Mart.
"I…alright. Fine. I'll go to the damn meeting," Dave grunted.
"Good," Kurt said, a look of relief passing over his face. "I'll meet you in the choir room, okay? Wait for me," Kurt said simply and then he was slipping into his classroom, closing the door behind him. He smiled at Dave through the window pane and then disappeared to find his seat.
oOo
That night, when Dave went home after a rather…interesting day. He sat heavily on his bed and tried to process all that had happened.
He had attended his first PFLAG meeting and had actually managed to make Kurt laugh in a way that wasn't full of menace towards him. Kurt had put a hand on his arm at the end of the meeting and said he was proud of him for coming. He said he looked forward to seeing him next Tuesday and then had left, but not before shooting Dave an encouraging smile.
Dave smiled to himself as he replayed the moment over and over again in his mind. Maybe this summer wouldn't be so bad after all.
Dave leaned over to his iPod docking station and turned it on, pressing play as he settled back onto his bed. He reached underneath where a small shoe box was resting and pulled out a tiny trinket from its inside. He held it gingerly in his hand, running his thumb over the spots where the paint had chipped some.
He closed his eyes and let the music wash over him as he clutched the cake topper to his chest and dared to dream of Kurt once more. If he had been singing along softly, only his walls would know and they certainly weren't going to tell anyone.
Lonely rivers sigh, "Wait for me, wait for me. I'll be coming home, wait for me."