Title: I Don't Really Know How To Tell You This
Author: tatterdemalion
Characters: Canada, Prussia, England, France, and America / PruCan and minor FrUK
Rating: PG-13
Summary: AU / When you have two dads and one jerk of a brother who all live in a rundown English pub, "meet the family" nights are not just awkward - they're horrifying. Based on a prompt from the LJ community "52 flavors"

Prompt:"I'm not sure my parents will approve! And they run a bar!"

Note: Last part! Thanks for the feedback :)


Once the anger had dissipated, Matt sat shoved up against the corner of his bed and felt extremely stupid. He shouldn't have said those things, and he shouldn't have left Gilbert down there to deal with his family.

There was a knock on his door.

"Cher," Francis called. "Will you let me come in?"

"Yes." Matt said sulkily, and his papa entered the room, a bemused smile on his face.

"Mathieu, don't be too hard on your father." Francis began, taking a seat on his son's bed. "You know how he gets."

At this, Matt rolled his eyes. Francis chuckled. "Ah, mon fils, you know he cares for you. He is keeping me up every night with worries. He doesn't know what he will do once you and Alfred graduate. And if I know Arthur, he is very hurt that you think he does not care."

"I didn't...I didn't mean it." Matt grumbled into his knees. "I was mad." he lifted his face and added, "But it does always seem like you like Al more." Francis considered this, shifting to cross his legs.

"You and Alfred are completely different, so your father and I treat you differently. Your grades are good, so we never feel the need to talk to your teachers about you. Alfred's teachers sometimes feel the need to talk to us." Francis chuckled. "You see? It may seem like we don't pay you much attention, but it is because we do not coddle you. You are in secondary school and you are almost an adult so we give you that freedom. I am sure, if you wanted to act like a child to gain our attention, you will find you will quickly get it - however, it will not be the good sort of attention. Understand?"

Matt felt horrible. "I'm sorry." he muttered miserably. "I didn't mean it."

"I know." Francis sighed, and reached out to wrap his arm around Matt's shoulders.

"I do believe." he said after a while, running a hand through his son's silky hair. "That your dinner date is waiting for you downstairs."

Matt groaned. "He probably thinks I'm such a wimp."

Francis laughed. "He is probably too preoccupied with your father and brother, so shall we - ?"

Matt got to his feet. "Oh God!" he exclaimed. "Poor Gilbert!"

When Matt and Francis got downstairs, the three men were deep in discussion. They broke off and Alfred turned to stare at Matt, eyes wide.

"You're not in an anime club?" he demanded. Matt turned tiredly to Gilbert.

The albino shrugged. "That's all I said." he seemed to hesitate, then as Matt passed his chair he reached out to touch the blonde's hand. Matt smiled, and when he sat down he twined their fingers together. Gilbert's grin widened in triumph.

"Uhm. I was afraid to tell you guys about Gilbert and I." Matt explained. "Because of...well, because I was a lot of stuff. I was nervous. I wasn't sure if you'd approve. So I told Al I joined a club after school and then I'd go and meet Gilbert."

At Alfred's horror struck expression, and Gilbert's laughter, Matt hastened to add, "A - and we didn't do anything!"

Francis looked like the cat that swallowed the canary. "Papa!" Matt glowered half-heartedly at him. "I'm serious, we didn't."

"Pardonne-moi, of course I believe you." Francis teased.

Arthur was sitting throughout all this with an odd, almost nostalgic look on his face. "Well," he spoke up, "if you have nothing to do after school I don't want you hanging around the building after hours."

Matt deflated at his father's words, but nodded. Gilbert gave his hand a brief squeeze.

"If you are going to visit with Gilbert, then you might as well bring him here, and hang out at home." Arthur finished with a grumble. He turned red when Matt's whole face lit up and he began beaming stupidly.

Eventually Arthur scowled fondly at his son. "Don't give me that look," he growled. "I'm not a slavedriver. Now be a dear and help your papa with dessert."

"There's dessert?" Gilbert looked excited. "Awesome!"


The tension lessened. Matt felt like he could breathe again. He was extremely embarrassed when Arthur gave him a lecture at the table about Saying What You Mean And Not Lying To Your Parents About Your Whereabouts, but he figured he deserved it. Gilbert laughed at his pained expression and took seconds of the mousse Francis made.

Matt walked Gilbert out the door after dinner, to say goodbye. They stood outside the front door, Gilbert's bike visible, propped up against the side of the pub. The older boy turned to Matt with a cheeky look in his eyes.

"I'm really - " Matt started, but Gilbert talked over him:

"I think you over-exaggerated everything. Your old man's pretty cool, in the end."

Matt flushed. "I wasn't trying to over-exaggerate." he admitted. "It just sort of happens, when my family's around."

He was temporarily surprised when Gilbert stepped closer and settled his hands on Matt's hips.

"I had an awesome time." Gilbert assured him. "And does this mean you'll be my boyfriend, now?"

Matt fumed. "Why are you asking me this if you already told my family we were dating?" he asked.

Gilbert paused to consider this. "Good point." he grinned and prodded Matt's chest with his index finger. "You're my boyfriend, then."

"Thanks so much." Matt said dryly.

Gilbert cackled before running a thumb over Matt's collarbone. "You know I'm jokin', kiddo." he declared. "You're too cute so I like to tease you."

Matt heaved a sigh before getting on his tip toes to kiss Gilbert.

"Thanks for convincing me to do this." he said. "I'm sorry if you thought I was embarrassed of you because I wasn't, it's just - "

Gilbert kissed him again, sliding an arm around the younger boy's waist to pull him close. "I get it." he said bluntly. "Whatever. At least now I can give you a hickey?" his eyes were hopeful. Matt laughed.

"Well, I guess you can, can't you?"

Gilbert's smirk sent a shiver down Matt's spine. "Awesome." he declared, using his free hand to tilt Matt's head up so he could nuzzle his face into the younger boy's neck.

Matt let out something that could've been a very undignified squeak and pushed half-heartedly at Gilbert's shoulders as he felt the albino's tongue flick out to brush along his skin.

"Gil, we're outside my house!" he protested. Gilbert sighed, breath hot against his neck.

"C'moooooon!" he whined. "I've been waiting forever!"

"Not right now!" Matt wriggled from the older boy's grasp, flushed and hot. "Jeezus, Gil, my family's inside!"

"So...later, right?" Gilbert waggled his eyebrows. Matt couldn't help but give a fond groan.

"...Yes." he agreed reluctantly. "Later."

Gilbert pumped his fists in the air. "All right!" he crowed, then opened up his arms with a simpering look. "Give me a goodnight kiss, at least?"

Matt responded by stepping back into his arms and pressing his lips to Gilbert's.

It became apparent, however, that Gilbert was looking for more than a "sweet dreams" peck. The older boy's lips parted and his tongue darted out to probe questioningly at Matt's teeth. The blond started, then opened his mouth to his boyfriend, returning the sentiment with his own tongue with a little more hesitation.

Gilbert gave a dark, hungry groan and he clutched at Matt, fingers digging into his side. Matt twisted in the red-eyed boy's grip, fingers clenched in his jacket, other hand tangled in the older boy's hair. Gilbert shifted closer with an exhalation, tasting like sweat and something sweet, like the mousse and whipped cream they'd just had. Their teeth clicked.

"Gross."

Matt squeaked and tore himself from the kiss. Alfred was standing in the doorway with his arms crossed, looking all the world like an overprotective big brother. Matt was half-expecting to see a shotgun.

"Al." Matt said in exasperation. "Do you have to stand there?"

"Yup." Alfred answered, not taking his eyes off Gilbert for a second. Then he raised his index and middle finger, pointed them at his eyes, then pointed his index at Gilbert.

"I'm watching you, dude." he told him sternly. "Make any wrong moves and I'll show you how I can drop kick your head."

Gilbert looked unimpressed. "Yeah, yeah, that's really great." he dead-panned. "Now leave us alone, yeah?"

Alfred's frown settled deeper on his face. Sensing the tension, Matt turned to place a quick kiss against Gilbert's lips.

"Uh...is it okay if I phone you? Maybe tomorrow we could go see a movie?" he asked quietly, a little awkward now that his brother was watching them, intently.

Gilbert nodded. "Sounds good. Yeah, phone me whenever." In Gilbert speak that meant any time after noon- Matt knew the older boy didn't really like getting up early. Seeing Alfred watching, Gilbert took a giant step back, curtsied, and shook Matt's hand in mocking, exaggerated movements.

"Catch you later, Mattie. See ya, Al." he saluted as he sauntered over to his bike. The brothers watched him fit his helmet over his head, swing a leg over his motorcycle, and start it up. Neither of them spoke until Gilbert was off down the highway.

Then Alfred turned to Matt with that look in his eyes and Matt cracked up.

"Oh my God you look so much like Dad right now!" he giggled. Alfred's frown got even more disapproving and...English.

"Speaking of," Arthur joined them in the doorway. "If you're quite done outside, perhaps now is a good time to have a talk?"

His voice was pleasant enough but Matt could just tell when Arthur wanted to give someone the talk.

And that someone, it seemed, would be him.

"I love you very much Daddy?" he tried hesitantly. Arthur pointed into the pub.

"Nice try, dear." he said mildly. "Inside."

Alfred shot him a smug look. Matt muttered something in French that luckily his father did not catch.


Francis straightened up, letting the dishcloth fall back on the counter. The dishes from dinner were done - outside he could hear the murmur of the pub's patrons settling down for a Friday night drink. Matt and Alfred were upstairs, playing video games, and his prickly little Englishman was behind the bar, serving up drinks. Francis supposed he should go out and help sit people and take their orders.

Arthur shot him a sour look as he came traversing out of the back.

"There you are!" he muttered as the Frenchman passed. "We're packed today - there isn't time to fool around."

"Oh, mon chou, I never fool around~!" Francis called, tying his hair back and greeting people with a sunny smile. When Arthur went into the back to get more...well, whatever he was getting, it was a good opportunity for Francis to slip into the back a few seconds later.

Arthur looked surprised to see him until Francis backed him into a shelf - then those giant brows furrowed and he said dryly, "I'm a little busy, Francis."

"I know." Francis purred, hands on the shelf behind Arthur. "I just wanted to compliment you on your astounding parenting skills."

Arthur stared. "Wh - really?" he asked in disbelief. Francis nodded.

"Really. Your barbed outward appearance belies the fact that you, mon rosbif, are a softie."

"Am not." Arthur shot back with a scowl that was not all anger. Francis laughed.

"Are too." he hummed. "And I know it. And your children know it. So there's no point in hiding it anymore you uptight old Brit."

Arthur made a face at him. "It pleases me so, when I spend an evening listening to the sound of my husband berating me in cold storage." he quipped sarcastically. "Now, if there's anything else?"

Francis kissed him (sneaking in a grope, but the Englishman was surprisingly lenient). "Je t'aime, Arthur." he said when they parted.

Arthur's face was red. "...I love you too, you sod, now come on, this pub does not make money by itself."

Francis watched his short Englishman storm from cold storage in a huff, tawny hair mussed, the back of his neck flushed a flustered red.

He was starting to like this place.


Note: Thanks to everyone for reading! I love this pub AU, one of my favourites. More to come, of the AmeRus variety ;)