Warning: Drama! Crack! IT IS ENDING! PREPARE YOURSELVES!

Chapter 17

AFTER THE WEDDING

The rest of the ceremony runs smoothly, Ronnie with tears in her eyes and even Alex though he wouldn't admit it. Afterwards, they take wedding photos, utilizing the club's gorgeous facilities. After maybe a hundred different pictures with a hundred different poses and Max criticizing everything, it's finally time for the reception. Champagne is uncorked. The wedding band kicks in. Damon and Kaylie share their first dance while everyone else is scattered around the room, reveling in the fact that they actually pulled it off.

Surrounded by music and people having a great time, Nicky and Austin are sitting at a table towards the back. It's evident they're both exhausted, just sitting there, barely able to move. With the way everyone around them is moving so fast and laughing so loud, it's making them feel even lazier.

"So do you hate me for the drugs and sending us all on a wild goose chase?" Austin asks. Nicky is staring out at the dance floor with his fingers loose around a glass of water. "And keep in mind that if I didn't roofie you then your inhibitions probably wouldn't've been that smashed and you probably wouldn't've married Kel or even got up the nerve to talk to her or gotten laid."

"Aus, my first instinct is always, always to be pissed at you, but I couldn't ever hate you," Nicky says. "And I guess you do have a point. Plus, I owe you an apology anyways. I said a lot of stupid things too…about your dad and about Damon."

"Truth is I said some or, well, a lot of stupid things too, about your dad and bringing up KP a ton just to piss you off. So I'm sorry for that," Austin admits. "And I'll try to act a little more grown up if you try to have a little more fun once in a while."

Nicky nods. "Deal."

Austin raises his beer bottle and Nicky taps it with his glass of water.

"Wow. I'm honestly surprised you boys actually made it here in one piece…"

Austin and Nicky both turn and see Kelly standing there with one hand propped up on her hip. Nicky's face lights up when it registers in his head that she's actually here with them and the change doesn't escape Austin who smirks and slaps him on the back.

"Parker, you look sexy as hell. I'd kiss you if I wasn't all gross. That's just asking for a KP beat down," Austin chuckles. He grabs his beer bottle and starts to stand. "Well, I'll leave you to…whatever married people do." Austin walks away and when Kelly's back is to him, Austin faces Nicky, giving his brother a big thumbs-up of encouragement. Nicky shakes his off and smiles as Kelly goes to fill Austin's chair.

"Hey, you made it," Nicky says. The softness to Kelly's face is undeniable and seeing her uncharacteristically coy, Nicky grins, scratching the back of his head. "Wow, for someone who stayed up all night, practically robbing a casino with a bunch of grown-up frat boys, you look gorgeous."

"Right. Unlike you." Kelly laughs to herself and reaches out to touch Nicky's messy hair. He tried to pat it down during the run from the lobby to where the ceremony was being held, but that didn't work out so well. "You just look like hell."

"How very kind of you, Mrs. Russo," Nicky says. He takes a sip of his water and stares out at the dance floor where Kaylie and Damon are dancing close. "But the important thing is that we made it. Damon and Kaylie are happily married."

"I noticed," Kelly says, looking out at the couple. "So I guess this means you didn't object and whisk Kaylie away to a cotton candy castle in the sky, riding out on a unicorn. I'm shocked."

"Didn't even cross my mind," Nicky assures her. "How did you get here so fast anyways?"

"Private jet."

"And why'd you go through all the trouble?"

Kelly shrugs. "After everything that happened this weekend I had to see how it ended. I swear, Nick, you better have put my name with yours on the wedding gift because I sure as hell didn't buy them anything." Nicky smiles. He did. "Plus, I figured I should give Max the ring back. I held it hostage, watched him suffer the entire weekend and made his worst nightmare come true by marrying into his family. I'd call that satisfied."

Nicky's lips pull to one side in a smile. "I wouldn't expect any less."

When she realizes how long she's been smiling at him, Kelly turns her attention back over to the others around the room. "So how was the ceremony?"

"Nice. Traditional, even if they improvised on the vows a bit," Nicky explains, not really knowing what else to say about it. A wedding is a wedding. "No theme. No costumes. No midget dressed as Yoda conducting the ceremony. Actually, it wasn't much fun at all."

"How lame."

"Exactly what I was thinking," Nicky agrees. "It paled in comparison to our wedding."

"Well, it isn't exactly fair comparing boring, normal people like Prince of Darkness Damon and Princess Kaylie Cruz to people as hot and badass as us," Kelly smirks, letting her hand rest on his arm.

"Sounds about right," Nicky nods. "So…Hawaii or the Bahamas?"

Kelly blinks. "What?"

"Our honeymoon," he answers in that low, sexy voice of his, leaning in closer.

Kelly pulls back before he can kiss her. "Nick…"

"Parks, there's no being scared of marriage anymore because we're already married," he says, sliding his hand over hers. "We've wasted years playing games or pretending we were over each other, but I can't anymore. Now, I love you and we're married and I'm not signing any damn papers until we give us a real shot. And…did I mention I love you?"

With an uncharacteristically shy smile, Kelly looks at their tangled fingers. "Rome. Because a beach isn't necessary and you'd probably get some weird sunburn. And nothing less than two weeks because I already know you're such a horny bastard we won't even get out of bed half that time. And if you ask me for permission to kiss me like you did with that hug I swear—"

And he kisses her.

…

Austin has the biggest smile on his face when he spots Nicky and Kelly all over each other. Lips on lips, her hands beneath his untucked shirt, his hand on her thigh, and it's all done so shamelessly, out in the open. The flower girls and ring bearer are giggling and pointing and Kaylie's grandmother ushers the kids away and does the sign of the cross. Austin couldn't be happier. Looks like Russo found his fun again.

"Um, when did that happen?"

Austin's smile gets even bigger when he finds Payson standing beside him. She looks significantly less stressed than she had when Austin first barged into the bride's suite. When he looks at her, Payson is staring across the way at where Nicky and Kelly have totally and completely reverted back to their college selves, a turn-off for most of the wedding attendees and not even giving a damn.

"Payson Keeler." Austin just opens his mouth and sings her name. He doesn't even mean to. It just happens. "Did you not hear? They got married. Introducing Mr. and Mrs. Russo."

Payson is confused, which is understandable, turning to Austin to search his face for any sign of deception. As proof, Austin fishes his wallet out of his back pocket to show off that wedding photo he is so freaking proud of. He hands it to Payson and watches as her expression goes from confused to disturbed in a matter of seconds.

"And when did all of this happen exactly?"

"Last Friday night," Austin explains.

"In Vegas?"

"Yep."

Payson looks up at him. "What?"

Austin laughs, shoving his wallet back into his pocket. "It's a, uh, long story, just more frat boy stories in fact. I don't know if you'd be interested…"

Payson folds her arms, biting at the bait he's throwing out. "Try me."

"How about we talk about it over dinner?" Austin asks. He teeters on his tiptoes, a little nervous despite how he commands himself to be cool. That's how he knows there's something special about this girl. She has the ability to second guess himself and make him nervous. Austin didn't know those existed anymore.

Laughing a little, Payson motions to the buffet table. "Need I remind you we already ate?"

"Hmm, true," Austin strokes his cheek. "Dinner tomorrow night then? What do you say? We can catch up and I can dazzle you with my storytelling abilities."

Payson looks at him hesitantly. "Like a date?"

Austin sighs playfully. "Well, I hear that's what real adults do. Real adults go on dates. You're going to have to go easy on me though. This responsible adult thing is new to me. Apparently I have to open doors for you and be engaged in conversation and pay for the meal at the end. Who knew people in our age bracket actually do things like this?"

"Oh, it's a mystery to me too." Payson laughs. "And sure. It sounds interesting."

"To say the least," Austin winks at her. "Now, can I buy you a drink?"

"Austin, they're free," Payson points out.

"Well, can I get you a free drink?" Austin asks. Payson nods her head. He offers her his arm and she takes it as they walk over to the bar. "So…any chance you're going to tell me what I said on that voicemail?"

"No," Payson laughs, probably at the very memory of it. "I think I'll save you the embarrassment."

Austin turns his eyes to the ceiling and groans. "Any chance you deleted it?"

Payson shakes her head. "Not a chance."

…

"I love my roomie! My roomie loves me! I love my roomie! My special cutie!" Arms wrapped tight around Ava Tucker, Faith sings her special little song, swaying slightly from side to side. She hums a few more bars to the same tune, disregarding the weird looks she's getting from the other guests.

"Faith, you should really cool it on the drinking," Ava says. By the look on the youngest Tucker's face, she's completely use to Faith being Faith. She pats Faith's head a couple times before Faith flings her arms off and protectively grabs her flute of champagne, taking a dainty sip.

Razor, sitting across from the girls, stares with his jaw dropped. "Faye, I cannot even comprehend how you're drinking after what happened over the course of this last weekend. Just watching you do it makes my brain want to explode."

"Someone's getting old," Faith teases. She looks around the reception for her wedding date and spots him talking to Payson by the bar. Seeing them, Faith gasps. "My wedding date ditched me. That's it. I know I have some leftover roofies somewhere…"

"So is everything cool with you and Austin?" Ava asks, ignoring Faith and eyeing Razor. "Faith updated me."

"Well, he did save my life by plowing a dude with his car. I think that warrants forgiveness. You girls should have seen it. Faith, you would have tripped out or gotten turned on…or both…simultaneously. LT, our bro is kind of a badass," Razor says just at the memory of Steve getting slammed by the front of the SUV.

Ava groans, running her fingers down the neck of her champagne flute. "That's good and all. Just don't let him hear that."

"Plus, we were just being friends," Razor says, settling down. "Friends call each other out on their shit. Like this," Razor spots Max across the way, snapping a picture of Alex and Kaylie sharing a dance. "Dude, your relationship with that camera is not natural! You should probably ask it to marry you!"

Faith stops searching through her purse and addresses Ava. "Have you talked to Ava yet?"

"No," she answers, "and I don't plan to."

"Well, prepare yourself, LT. He's heading this way," Faith announces.

"Dude, Razor, as if Kaylie and Damon's families don't already think we're total idiots," Max says once he reaches their table. Razor tugs him down into the empty seat next to him and Max complies. "Oh, Ava, hey."

Little Tuck doesn't say anything, just takes a gulp of her champagne and gives him a nod.

"So how are you and Maeve?" Faith asks, choosing not to notice the cloud of awkward hanging over their table. Max runs his hand over his new buzzcut and stares down at his camera.

"Oh, you know, the usual. She gave me the 'I'm not talking to you until you get tested' look so I've been steering clear," Max says offhandedly. "And for the record, all of you are going to want to molest my camera just as badly when I tell you that there are pictures from last night on here."

Razor and Faith exchange looks and then scramble over to Max's side as they look through them. Ava remains where she is, but is happy to have the distraction.

"Oh. My. God," Faith gasps, "So many topless strippers."

"So many pics with Austin wearing no pants…"

"So many of Nicky and Kelly eating each other's face."

Ava laughs. "And I'm so glad I didn't rush over to look at that."

"Aww, no this is a cute one of the happy couple," Razor says. Max clicks to the next picture. "Whoa, now that's straight up dirty! Well, I don't know what to tell you, Maxi. You better get used to it, bro. She's apart of your family now, like, she literally is your cousin-in-law now."

"And she's eating Nicky's face as we speak," Faith sings. "Ah, all is right in the world."

Just then Razor looks up to the door and sees the Samoan thugs from Vegas standing there, watching him. They look pissed. Trying to stay as calm as possible excuses himself from the table, ready to man-up and face the mess he's made. He steals the rest of Faith's champagne and knocks it back, leaving his friends who are still trying to make sense of the pictures from the weekend. As he's making his way to the door, Razor inhales, scared shitless.

"Okay, I'll go with you. Just don't ruin the wedding," Razor says. He holds out his wrists as if they're going to slap handcuffs on him. Mr. Smash walks out, then Razor and Mr. STFU last. They walk out to the lobby and there's Steve Tanner with a cast on his leg, sitting in a gold wheelchair. "Steve, I—"

"Don't speak," Steve says. "Did you really think you were just going to leave Vegas and everything just be over between us? Let me tell you, Razor, you're probably the easiest person I've ever had to track down. Ever."

He wheels towards Razor, who's already expecting the worst, when Steve just extends his hand for Razor to shake. Razor blinks and Steve smiles.

"I don't understand," Razor says slowly. "Is this some handshake of death or something?"

"We're good," Steve says. Now Razor is even more confused. "Your friend, or, well, your friend's wife, Kelly Parker-Russo, what a woman. She paid your marker. The full 200 grand, sprung for medical expenses too, which I thought was rather classy of her."

"Oh my God," Razor sighs in relief. "Oh My God! Oh My God! Oh My God!"

Steve chuckles. "When I asked her why she was bailing out a loser like you she said she could care less about your wellbeing, but she wouldn't want her husband to be with one less brother. You are one lucky bastard."

Razor shakes Steve's hand and then starts dancing around in his happiness.

"Ray, is there a problem here?" Austin asks. Nicky and Max accompany him. They stand tall, all aggressive, but Steve just rolls his eyes and starts wheeling away with his thugs following.

"Everything is fan-friggin'-tastic!" Razor shouts. He runs up to Nicky and gives him a big hug. "I'll tell you now, Russo, if you don't go down on your wife tonight I might have to!"

Max frowns. "That is so one of the things you keep to yourself…"

"Kelly Fucking Parker paid off Steve Tanner for meeee!" Razor, with his arms still around Nicky, starts jumping up and down with glee. "I mean, she didn't have to fly them out here and nearly give me a heart attack, but hey, I guess busting balls is the KP way. You've got yourself a quality woman, Russo."

Max looks confused. "Kelly Parker Satan incarnate actually went out on a limb to help you?"

"Yeah, she just told me about it. Apparently, your ex-stripper friend was hunting Vegas for us and ran into Kel. That's why she wasn't there to meet us when we finally found Damon. She was with LoTan or, Lauren, getting things cleared up," Nicky says. He then reaches into his pocket and pulls out a slip of paper. "Kelly also gave me this to give to you. From Lauren."

Razor unfolds the piece of paper and starts dancing around even more. "Her digits! Score!"

"Looks like the universe's initials are KP she hooked you up," Austin says proudly.

"Yeah, like friggin' Christmas!" Razor shouts. Max looks at the floor, being reminded of one specific Christmas all those years ago. "Best Weekend Ever!"

"Hey! I've been looking for you guys! You better come quick. Drama," Damon says. Like the faithful groomsmen they are, the gang races back to the ballroom with Damon leading them. Once they're in through the door he motions to where Kelly and Maeve are standing, facing off.

"Yes!" Razor shouts. "This wouldn't have been complete without a good ol' fashion catfight! My money is on KP! Who wants to start the betting pool?" Everyone gives Razor a pointed look and his enthusiasm quickly fades away. "…Or not."

"Tell me why the hell you have Max's grandma's wedding ring on your skanky finger!" Maeve demands. She's drawing attention to herself and doesn't even care that she's killing the festive mood in the room.

Kelly looks the least bit intimidated, bored even. An evil smile unfolds across her lips and she holds up her hang, shoving off the ring. "Oh, did Maxi not tell you? I got married this weekend."

Everyone who didn't already know looks on, stunned.

"To Nicky!" Max shouts, breaking through the crowd that formed. He bravely gets between the two girls, holding his arms out as if to separate them if one tries to start something. "She got married to Nicky this weekend!"

"You did?" Kaylie asks, walking over. "Congratulations!"

"TO NICKELLY!" Austin raises his beer bottle and everyone around them cheers and drinks. Nicky looks extremely embarrassed and Max is still panicking while Kelly and Maeve remain locked in a heated stare.

Maeve then turns an accusing glare on Max. "Max Spencer, what the hell is going on? I've been calling and calling and you don't answer! Now this hoe is wearing my ring!"

"Shut your whore mouth, Maeve! You're ruining the wedding!" Kelly shouts. She's about to charge over, but Nicky wraps his arm around her just in time to stop her and keep her in place at his side.

Max sighs. "Maeve, the truth is that I gave grandma's ring to Nicky to give to Kelly."

"You what?" everyone says in synchronized shock.

"Why would you do something so stupid?" Maeve asks, looking disgusted.

"To be honest, I was really drunk at the time," Max laughs, "but I've been thinking more about it and it was the right thing to do. I still think Kelly Parker is a soul-sucking demon that secretly eats babies…but Nicky loves her and if my cousin thinks she's good enough for him then she deserves grandma's ring."

"Wow. Really?" Kelly asks. To think she was about to give the family heirloom back. Fuck that. She's keeping it now.

"Really," Max nods. "Welcome to the family."

"Aww, Maxi-pad, how sweet," Kelly coos. Max visibly flinches and just to annoying him further (it's just how Kelly is) she goes over with open arms and hugs him. Max makes a face, afraid she's going to go postal and tear his ear off a la Mike Tyson. Kelly debates kissing his cheek just to make him totally freak out and piss off Maeve, but Kelly resists and goes back over to Nicky.

"Wait, what about me?" Maeve demands. "What about us?"

Max sighs and grabs Maeve's arm, saying they need to talk in private. As he's ushering her towards the back, most of the guests go back to the reception festivities while the rest of the wedding party stares off after their youngest brother and his hot model owner.

"Are we really going to let them talk in private?" Faith asks, a little bummed.

Austin looks like he's holding back. "Yes, Faith, because responsible adults don't eavesdrop."

Payson folds her arms and smiles at the anxious two. "Go ahead."

"Sweet!" Razor shouts. "But first," he pops over to Kelly, "thank you for everything. I mean that. Kelly Fucking Parker, you are my superhero, my savior with a shit ton of cash that I will pay you back even if it takes me my entire life and I need to go-go dance to do it."

"God, you're a weirdo. Whatever, Laser," Kelly says, but smiles.

After hugging her against her will, Razor dashes over to where Austin and Faith are right inside the ballroom doors, straining their ears to hear Max and Maeve's conversation happening right outside.

"Max, what's going on?"

"Maeve, are you happy with me?"

"Of course I'm happy with you," she says. "Honey, we've known each other since college and we've been official forever. Why? Are you not happy with me? Because that's just plain ridiculous if you say that."

"All I know is that I spent this entire weekend defending our relationship to those guys and I thought coming back here, being with you again would remind me why we're still together, but I don't know anymore," Max says. "I'm not happy right now, May, and I don't know if I want to break up, but I think if we're going to end up hating each other and I don't want to hate you."

Max looks at Maeve, sincere and honest.

"Are you fucking kidding me!" she screams.

Max shakes his head. "I can't do this right now. I haven't slept or showered and my hair is gone." Max throws his hands up in defeat. "I'm going to go in there and get wasted with my brothers all over again and maybe I'll call you on Monday and we can go get tested together."

Max lays his hand on her shoulder and gives it a little shake before he makes his way back into the ballroom. Maeve is so shocked she can't even speak, staring at Max's shaved head. When she finally finds her voice it's accompanied with heels stomping the floor.

"Max! Maxwell Spencer! Don't you dare walk away from me! Get back here this second!" Maeve shouts. Max stops for a good five seconds and reconsiders, but ends up continuing on his way away from her. "Max! You stupid little clown, I own you!"

Max walks into the ballroom and Austin shuts the door on Maeve. Austin gives him a pat on the back and offers him his beer, but Max waves it off and they go over to the bar to get new bottles where they can watch the bartender uncap it as if to be sure it isn't tampered with. After grabbing a fresh beer, Max spots Ava talking to Payson and goes right over, not one bit concerned about Austin's reaction.

"Ava hey," he says nervously.

She eyes him like he's the main attraction in a freak show. "Max, hey, again."

"I just wanted to tell you that I'm sorry for being a jerk to you…for as long as we've known each other and especially during the Sigma days. I was a dumb kid and I never really thought about what I was doing and I get how that's wrong now. It took me long enough, but I do. So if I ever upset you in any way, I really am sorry and apologize for it. I know better now," Max rambles. "Oh, and it's really nice to see you see."

Ava looks like she really wants to stay annoyed and angry, but can't. "Wow, Max, that's scary mature of you."

"So can we call this an apology accepted?" Max asks hopefully.

Ava nods. "Apology accepted."

Max gives her a smile and tips his beer to her before being dragged away by Austin, calling a Sigmas only meeting. Austin grills him about what he just said to his sister, but Max just smiles and shakes his head, refusing. The two then go over to a table where Razor, Nicky and Damon are sitting, gazing across the room at where the girls are inspecting Kelly's ring.

"Jesus, I am beat," Damon says. He feels like this is the first time he's sat down since they got to the hotel this morning. The exhaustion is evident all around the table, but so is how content and downright giddy they all are. "So what exactly happened this weekend?"

"Well," Nicky says, "I got married to Kelly, Austin drugged all of us and locked you on a roof in hundred-degree weather, Max got two new haircuts and finally earned his balls back from Maeve, smoothed this over with Ava and Razor got into some trouble with some thugs, scored a ex-stripper's number and hopefully learned his lesson."

"I did learn something. When in need, call KP," Razor says. He laughs at Damon's confused expression. "We'll tell you the whole story when you get back from your honeymoon."

"And I want you to know that I really am sorry," Austin says. He looks too tired to put up a front and is completely and utterly sincere. Damon gives him a nod, acceptance, and so Austin raises his glass. "To Damon and Kaylie!"

"To Damon and Kaylie!" the others echo.

"To me and Kaylie," Damon says, lazily lifting his glass. "And to being here with my four former best friends in the entire world."

The guys all laugh, nearly chocking on their individual drinks.

"Friends or former friends, we're always going to be brothers so you can't get rid of us as easily as you might thing, Dae," Max points out, clinking his glass against Damon's.

"True. And I've long accepted that. Honestly, there's nowhere else I'd rather be right now," Damon says. They all take a moment to sip their drinks and let it all sink in. Damon clears his throat. "That being said, let's not get too stupid tonight, okay? I'm going on my honeymoon in a little more than twenty-four hours…"

"Of course not," Nicky scoffs at the very idea.

"Yeah, we totally learned our lesson," Razor says, trying to be very serious.

"Totally," Max agrees.

They all clink their glasses again and eye each other out with mischief before they all chug the rest of whatever they were drinking. Austin is the first to slam the butt of his empty beer against the table and the other guys do the same, right on his tail.

Austin has that mischievous glint in his eyes and smirks as he mutters, "We're so fucked."

THE END

A/N: TEARS IN MY EYES. Okay, I'm not actually crying, but I do feel the void. I'm going to miss this story. Oh well. The show must go on and that show is named LLD2! It has been a pleasure writing this crazy, nonsense crack fic for all you lovely people. I appreciate you and hope you loved this insane OOC ride. Do me a fav? Review one last time? Loves yous guys! Always. Until next fic!

xoxo