A/N: Yeah, yeah. I know I said I was going to update BR but... I felt like a depressing story atm... And sorry to say that this chapter might be a little depressing :P But isn't the story? :D Haha. I love you guys.

51/50 is a three day hold btw.

This chapter goes out to TracyCook.

Tawni

"Tawni." I heard a knock at the door to see a nurse who works at this hell hole looking at me, she was one of the only ones I talked to though. "It's time for your meds." She smiled at me, walking inside of my room. I nodded scooting down the bed to meet her at the end, she sat next to me and handed me two plastic cups. One with pills, one with water.

I looked at the big pills, cringing. I hated taking these things. I hate it so much. "Tracy?" I called her name, she looked at me moving her head to the side in questioning way. "Hmm?"

"How much longer do I have to be here?" I bit my lip, still staring at these stupid anti-depressions.

"I don't know." She rubbed my back, "How are you doing with the whole... thing?"

"Umm." I closed my eyes tight. "Good." I lied.

"Tawni Hart..." She said my name, almost forcing me to look at her. I didn't want to though. I felt to guilty.

"How long have I been here?" I asked trying to change the subject. "I thought I was on a 51/50. I thought that that was only a 3 day hold? I've been here for like... a year..."

She laughed besides me, pulling me closer to her,"You've been here 7 days. And it's because you keep messing up."

"Being here makes me sadder." I took the pills fast, and dry. Washing them down with water so they wouldn't get stuck in my throat. "I hate Chad for bringing me here. I want to be with my friends. I want my job, my car. My Yorkie." She laughed next to me, "I even want my mommy. I am a 20 year old grown woman and I want my mom." I felt tears start to stream down my face, "You know what I miss the most?"

I felt her nod, "Yeah, your ex."

I felt the tears start to roll down my face as I ducked closer to her, my head in the crock of her neck. "I miss Sonny so much. And I hate Chad for putting me here. I'm afraid of these people here. They scare the living shit out of me. I'm not that crazy am I?"

"No." She said, "But you did try and kill your self."

FLASH BACK

"Bye Tawn." Sonny walked out of our dressing room with James wearing a pink blouse that I got her for our first year anniversary... Our fucking first one! We celebrated being together for a year. It was the first time... It was the first time we told each other, "I love you." And the first time we made love... Like really really made love. We didn't have sex. We didn't fuck. Nope, we made love.

And now, it's ruined. Really ruined. That pink blouse won't be taken off by be tonight. It won't be taken off nicely either. Heck, I don't even know if it will be taken it off. But I didn't care.

I couldn't handle being like this. This unhappy. I couldn't handle knowing that Sonny doesn't even remember what that little pink fabric means. If we just broke up like normal people. I think I'd be fine. What makes me so mad is the fact that she doesn't remember all the good times together.

I started to freak out in the middle of the room. Was I going to do it? Yes. Did I want to? Yes. Did I care that I was going to hurt people that I love? A little.

I pulled out my phone to type a quick text

To: Chad

Going to have to cancel tonight. And every night for the rest of my life. I love you Chad.

~T. Hart.

I set down my phone and went to my vanity mirror, pulling out my drawers, searching for the new razor. The new shinny razor, I just bought. For this. I don't like feeling this way. No- I hate feeling this way.

I looked at the razor up close. It was so sharp. And perfect. I set it down on the floor and ran back to the bathroom to go through the cabnit. just to give it an extra boost. All I could find was a bottle of Aspirin.I groaned running back to the place I left my razor.

I poured the Aspirin out on the floor, counting how many were left. 10.

"Fuck."

I shrugged, tears starting to blur my vision as I took one at a time.

Did I really want to do this?

Yes... no?

I bit my lip as more tears started to fall, I held the razor in between my thumb and pointer finger, crying more as I pushed it deep into the skin of my right wrist. Dragging it across.

"Sonny..."

I looked down and saw my wrists and thought that I wasn't bleeding enough, so I cut until I couldn't see anymore.

END

And that was the last thing I remember before I woke up in this dumb hospital. Apparently I'd forgot to lock the doors and Chad freaked out after he had gotten the text I sent him. He came into the room finding me with blood all over me. He called 911 and had me sent here to this fucking Adult mental hospital.

I wanted to kill him.

I looked at Tracy, "he isn't visiting me tonight is he?"

She shrugged, "I don't know." She shrugged. "But what I do know is that you're getting a new roommate."

I cringed, looking over at the empty bed next to the one we were sitting in now. "Why?" I pouted.

She laughed, "girl, you make me laugh."

I smiled, "Well it is my job!" I snorted, "You know, So Random!"

She patted my back. "Yeah. I have to go though. Get ready for visiting hours. You okay?"

I nodded even though we both knew it was a lie.

Sonny

"How is she doing?" I asked Chad over the phone.

"Tawni... She isn't doing good Sonny. I just got off the phone with her doctor... he is putting her on more meds."

I couldn't help but tear up, "Oh my god. I'm so sorry." I told him. "Could... I'm going to see her tomorrow."

"No you're not!" Chad's voice elevated through the phone, "You'll just make things worse."

That was an hour ago. Why would I make things worse? I wanted to be there for my friend. I really did. I miss her. I want her to feel better. But Chad wasn't making me feel better. So I went to James... Well... James came over. With some beers.

I needed a distraction. And he as the only thing I had right now.

We were making out, with out clothing on as a mater of fact. Hehe. We haven't gone all the way yet. But I'm pretty sure tonight is the night. He is just so perfect. He is everything I have ever wanted-

"I lied." He interrupted my thoughts, I looked up at him as he was pulling my bra off of my body. I looked at him funny, "What?" I wrapped my arms around his neck pulling his lips closer to mine, I could taste the Corona on his lips. He pulled back slightly, looking into my eyes.

"I led." He repeated. His hands moving under our bodies, his lips attacking my neck making me giggle. I felt cool air in my nether regions a blush crept on my face as I felt his hand wiggle and pleasure me. "And what is that Mr. Conroy?" I gasped and scrapped his back.

His lips pressed against mine, his hand pulled back and went to mine. I felt him at my entrance and we began to rock together, "Oh James. I love you."

"You shouldn't say that babe." He went on his elbows so he could look at me better, "I'm a liar."

All kinds of pleasure ran through my body I was to distracted to hear what he was saying, "W-what?"

He started to laugh and grunt as he got faster, "I have been wanting to do this since the day I saw you, do you know that?"

I blushed, "I-I, oh, god, fuck. James."

"Yeah that's right baby." He sat up straight still pounding into me, "Wonna know a secret?" He picked up my hand kissing each on of my knuckles. "I don't love you."

My eyes opened almost automatically, "You're joking..." I gulped, "R-r-ight?"

"Nope." He moved faster. "I lied about us being together just so I could get laid. With you. That's right enjoy it."

My eyes started to water, "So this whole time you've been fake?" I tried to push him off of me, but the pleasure my body was receiving made it hard to move. "Was I ever with Chad?"

"Don't cry..." He wiped my tears away, "Com'on, just enjoy it and cum." He huffed as he started to huff and moan loader, "Oh my god. Not getting dick for 3 years really helped you. You're so fucking tight. I need to get with more lesbians."

"What?" I couldn't see anymore. I couldn't feel anymore. "So, so I was..." He groaned one last time before falling on top of me. "Get off of me!"

"Are you sure you don't want more?"

"Get out James! Now! I pushed him off of my, and on the floor. Why would you lie to me!" I cried throwing things at him."I knew something was off when we were together!" I wanted to puke.

"Well, duh... You hate my guts. It was the only was I could get in your pants."

"Why me?" I cried.

He shrugged again, "It was a bet for 20$ that I couldn't get with a lesbian."

"I was a 20$ fucking bet!" I couldn't stop the tears. I just stopped moving. I watched James move around my house and grab his things, he placed the last two beers in front of me and kissed the top of my head, "You'll never see me again."

I cried my self to sleep after I drank the beer. My body was sore.

I thought about only Tawni that night.

Tawni

"Tawni!" I heard my name being called as I looked at my face in the mirror, brushing my teeth.

"Yes Sam?" I called out to my roommate who sat on the other side of the door. She was here because her daughter thought she was going to kill her self. When in reality she took to many aspirin and didn't mean too. She was only 30 and had a 15 year old daughter and a 12 year old son. She has been with the same man since she was 14. I call that true love right there. She and I have been bunking together in this crazy house for like 4 days.

I've been here for 12 days.

"I need to pee! And also Tracy needs you." I laughed before stepping out of the door and letting her in. I walked out and into the hall to find Tracy sitting next to our door with a cup of coffee and a pack of gum. I slid down the wall with her and patted her knee.

"Why are you so nice to me Tracy Cook?" I looked into her eyes.

"Why?" She laughed taking a sip of her coffee, "Because you're nice."

I looked down, "It's not because I'm "Tawni Hart" is it?" I put quotations around my name, flipped my hair and and smiled my fake smile.

She laughed, "No." She handed me a piece of gum. "I didn't even know you were on a show until you told me." She paused. "No that's a lie. I didn't know you were on a show until I looked it up to see if you were lying or not."

I looked at her confused, "Why would I lie?"

"Look where you're at." She gesstered to the people walking back and forth talking to each other, themselves, or inanimate objects.

"Oh, yeah." I stuck the gum in my mouth and smiled, "thank you."

"No problem," She wrapped her arm around me, "So we got this call from a Allison... Do you know one? It was for you. They are coming to see you tomorrow."

My heart went up into my throat, I pressed my face into my knees, "Yeah I know her."

"Is she...?" Tracy started to ask.

"Yeah... she's Sonny..."

A/N: So what you guys think? kinda crazy huh? :D Review please I'll update pretty soon, I nly have 2 more chapters left... so... yeah :D Thank you so much guys!

James is a jack ass, fuck him :P I feel bad for bad Sonny. And Tawni, mental hospitals sssssssssuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuck.

Love, love.

firelady101~

I'll update asap if I get reviews! :D