Holy moly an update! What crazy times we are living in right? Might as well utilize the free time. Also MIDNIGHT SUN IS FINALLY BEING RELEASED! Old readers I suggest rereading as all chapters have been edited for content (I'm horrified at myself for all the typos, missing words, and continuity errors. Hopefully I caught them all.).

I started this story when I was 17! Now I'm 26, it's crazy to see how time flies.

Now we begin to get into the thick of things. Here's Rosalie's story. It's a long one.

*Possible Triggers: sexual assault/trauma and domestic violence. Discretion advised*

Chapter 16

At seventeen, I started to starve myself
I thought that love was a kind of emptiness
And at least I understood then the hunger I felt
And I didn't have to call it loneliness

~Hunger: Florence and the Machine

"You do realize you're going to have to give Edward back his jacket eventually." Phil starts as he pulls onto a long winding street leading to a small subdivision of houses.

"I know. He'll get it…eventually." I retort, snuggling closer into the much too large jacket. It had been a couple of days since we switched mentors and today was supposed to be my first one on one session with Rosalie. I was nervous about the entire situation but Edward assured me that it would be fine.

She lived on the outskirts of Port Angeles. It shocked me that she would make the nearly two-hour commute back and forth every day to Forks for work, but I guess it just showed how dedicated she was to her job. Apparently, Rosalie had some business to take care of in P.A, so Phil was dropping me off this morning, with Edward picking me up later this evening since he was coming from Seattle and would pass this way. School was canceled the next day for administrative meetings so lucky for me; I wouldn't have to worry about returning home at a late hour. Phil gives me another pointed look.

"Still it's not right to hold on to people's things without permission." I fought the urge not to laugh.

In all honesty, a part of me really didn't want to give Edward back his jacket. It was warm against the constant cold, wet Washington weather and it smelled like him. A scent that I was finding often eased the inklings of panic that threatened to overwhelm me every day. I know it was weird to be comforted by someone's scent but it worked…even if he did annoy me 90% of the time.

I startle slightly when Phil rests a hand on my shoulder. I hadn't realized we'd stopped; more like parked in front of a small but quaint little house at the end of the street. Pastel yellow painted with various flowers blooming from the yard, it was the picture-perfect "American" dream house, and perfect for Rosalie. Two cars sat in the driveway in front of us.

"You okay Bella?" Phil asks again. I nod my head. I reach in the backseat for my bag and get out just as the front door opens. I barely have the chance to close the car door before I'm bombarded by one of the largest dogs I've ever seen. I defensively place my hands in front of my face, which proves to be useless as it tackles me to the ground. The scream building in my throat turns into giggles as a rough tongue begins giving me wet sloppy kisses all over my face.

"Henry no! Oh I am so sorry. Henry come back now!" A soft voice I don't recognize commands. The dog is suddenly gone and I look up into the face of a pretty brunette with hazel eyes. Rosalie runs out of the house and comes over to my side to help me up while I try to wipe away the slobber on my face.

"I'm so sorry Bella, Henry means well, he's just a little rambunctious with new people." I get up and dust my backside off.

"No harm, no foul." I shrug off. I look over to see Phil hugging the pretty brunette, with the dog who I now know as Henry laying at their feet. Rosalie pulls me over to the two of them. The brunette smiles at the both of us as we approach.

"Vera, this is Bella, Phil's niece. Bella, this is my girlfriend Vera Wilson." Rosalie beams with a smile and I try to hold back my slight shock. No wonder Phil said she wasn't interested. Vera reaches out and pulls me into a warm hug.

"Nice to meet you Bella, I've heard so much about you. I'd like to apologize for Henry again. I let him out to do his business and had no idea he would jump you like that." I lean down to brush my hand against the dog's soft fur.

"It's fine. No biggie." I look over to see a few suitcases by the door.

"Going somewhere?" I question. Vera looks over and sighs. "Unfortunately yes. My boss has me doing some big account with one of our clients over in San Francisco for a couple of days so I need to go 'kiss' their asses so we can get it." She mocks in a deep voice causing Rosalie and Phil to laugh. "Your uncle is going to drop me off at the airport so you and Rose can have your time together." She finishes stepping over to Rosalie's side. Vera wraps an arm around her waist with a grin. Phil steps back.

"That reminds me…" He walks over to go gather her bags, Henry trailing behind him. I turn back to Rosalie and Vera.

"I hope you and Rose have a wonderful time this week, you can keep her busy so she doesn't miss me too much." Vera presses a kiss to her cheek. Rosalie rolls her eyes with a mischievous grin.

"Ignore her," she starts. "I for one, am going to be so relieved that I don't have to deal with her hogging the sheets at night." She mocks whispers, causing Vera to poke at her side. Rosalie pulls away with a squeal.

"I heard that!" She growls. I hear the sound of the trunk closing and Phil walks back over.

"You ready?" Vera nods her head and pulls Rosalie close into a tight hug. I can see her whispering something in Rosalie's ear that makes her teary-eyed and I walk away; not wanting to be an intrusion on such an intimate moment. After reassuring Phil that I would be fine and a few kisses from Rosalie to Vera, we both watch as they pull off down the street. Rosalie turns to face me.

"How about some tea?" I nod and follow behind her into the house, with Henry hot on our tails.

"Henry out!" Rosalie commands as she heads towards the kitchen. The dog, whose mix I'm still not sure of, whimpers and comes over to my side.

"Bella, make yourself at home. Feel free to look around. It'll only be a few minutes." She calls. I look around her living room, and it's just as I imagined. The room is large and open; the walls painted a light beige color. A large grey sofa is in the middle of the room with various pink, white, and grey pillows upon it. In front of it is a large steel coffee table with the same flowers from outside, artfully arranged in a black vase. It was girly, yet mature and reminded me of one of those model apartments you saw on TV. It was fitting considering Rosalie always looked as if she stepped off a runway.

What really caught my attention were the various pictures on the wall. There had to be close to forty in an artistic assortment that resembled a swirl. I looked closer at the pictures and recognized a few of the faces; some of the mentors from the program and some of Vera with people I assumed were her family and friends. I could hear Rosalie knocking away in the kitchen and was just about to sit down when I see a picture on the far end.

It was placed at the very end of the arrangement and nearly blocked by a side table and lamp against the wall. You would have honestly missed if you weren't looking for it. I step closer and see that it appeared to be a wedding photo of Rosalie and her parents. I'd forgotten at one point she had been married, although I wasn't sure why this photo would be out. Rosalie was in the middle looking immaculate in her flowing gown of white; her long blond tresses shown hanging over a shoulder. To her left, was an older blonde woman that appeared to have one too many visits with a Botox needle and to her right, was an older gentleman with salt and pepper hair, and reminded me a bit of Clark Gable.

While seemingly simplistic to the eyes, as one would assume a photo to be of a bride with her parents, it was the guy in the photo's possessive grasp on Rosalie's waist that was a little frightening. Maybe he wasn't her father after all. I note the forced smile on all of their faces and startle as I hear Rosalie settle something down on the table behind me. I jump and know she's caught me prodding. I turn around apologetic and she offers me a warm but knowing smile.

"Tea?"

…..

" I know you have a few questions so you might as well get them out the way." Rosalie starts. I sit down beside her on the sofa and she hands me a cup of freshly poured black tea and gestures to the condiments on the table. While she fixes her own drink, I add sugar and cream to mine and try to gather my thoughts.

"I don't know where to start." I breathe.

"I can see the big one you're itching to ask. Go ahead, everyone usually does." She laughs taking a sip of her own tea. I look down at my own and begin stirring.

"So, you and Vera…" I start, watching as Rosalie's eyes brighten at the thought.

"She and I have been together for the past three and a half years. She's the love of my life."

"That's great." It's all I manage to say dumbly and Rosalie smirks wryly.

"But unexpected right?" I hesitantly nod my head, afraid of her reaction. She pats my hand knowingly and smiles.

"I get it, really I do. I know how people see me. Pretty, blonde, and fit. All I need is a big burly man by my side and I'll be complete right?" Rosalie scoffs. "You should see the stares when Vera and I go out. Some men are fascinated, no doubt by the underlying fantasy and the women and bible thumpers horrified."

"I imagine that can be very difficult." I respond taking a sip. Rosalie nods her head.

"You try and ignore the stares and comments but it does get a little exhausting after a while. Lets be honest, I know I'm attractive, as vain as it is to say and at one point in my life, I've used my looks to my advantage. Sometimes for good, but more often bad. I know people stare at me and at one point it gave me a high, but as I got older, I wanted to be known for more than just my looks and valued for something other than material substance." Rosalie shakes her head.

"Look at me getting ahead of myself. Anyway like I said, I was the poster child of the "American dream", beautiful, a homemaker, docile, and subservient to the world's whims. All I needed was the husband."

"I see you found him." I gesture to the picture on the wall but she ignores me and keeps talking.

" I could have had it all at my fingertips but I went against these 'ideals' when I realized I liked girls at the age of thirteen. Imagine my horror of realizing while my friends crushed over Jonathan Taylor Thomas or River Phoenix, I was too busy being fascinated by Tracey Gold and Janet Jackson. My mother was absolutely horrified. My mother is from old money so anything outrageous that could make her different from her snooty country clubs fiends was out of the question. Imagine Alexis Colby from Dynasty but make her blonde. Damn, maybe that reference went over your head." She laughs and I shake my head.

"I get the reference. My mother loved to watch those cheesy soap operas." I reply. Rosalie grins and continues speaking.

"She copped it up to a phase and shoved me into anything that could serve as a distraction. She thought it worked, and maybe for a time it did, I mean I did get married after all. I was in love with the idea of love so I took what I could get, but sometimes, that isn't enough. After my divorce," she hesitates on the last word. " I was pretty sure that love was something not in the cards for me, and just when I gave up and thought that loneliness would become the norm, I met Vera.

"We met in one of the most cliché fashions ever. At a bar, with Emmett no less." Rosalie giggles. "I was just about to tell him off for being a 'cockblocker'…well, you know," she insinuates and I snort.

"She walked in and I thought right then and there that was one of the most beautiful women I'd ever seen. Vera didn't notice me of course; trying to gauge women was a bit rough for me. It wasn't if I had this big sign that signaled if a woman was interested in me or not. Emmett had said something that pissed me off and I was just about to storm off when she approached us and said whenever I'm done with this 'lug head', she'd be more than willing to buy me a drink. After pushing Emmett away onto some girl, we spent the entire night talking and we've been together ever since.

"I know what you're thinking, who would have thought Rosalie Hale the lesbian? She finally finishes. I look back at my drink not realizing how cold it had gotten. I settle my drink back onto the table and shake my head.

"Actually no, I wasn't thinking that. It's beautiful really; like a fairytale. To have someone love you that much. Love is love. Who cares about gender?" I finish and Rosalie smiles at me with tears in her eyes.

"Yeah, well I wish my mot.., ahem some of my friends and hell, even the state of Washington thought as you did."

"One day it will happen." I say optimistically. Rosalie sighs distractedly before looking up and smirking at me.

"So your uncle told me how you thought we were a thing when we first met." I cover my face with my hands.

"I'm so embarrassed. I don't know what I thought. I just can't see why he's single for no other reason than me being a hindrance in his life." I admit. As if sensing my discomfort, Henry trots over and rests his head in my lap. I brush my hand against his furry head.

"I truly hope you don't believe that. Phil loves you. He would do anything for you." Rosalie pushes and I scoff. Rosalie grabs my hand.

"You just said it yourself Bella. You said that loving someone so much is a beautiful thing. Why won't you believe it when it applies to yourself huh?" I shake my head, not really believing her. I let out a deep breath. I knew I was a hypocrite. I look over at that picture on the wall again and know the next question I'm ready to ask.

I wanted to ask about her ex-husband but she shakes her head, seeing my line of thinking. She gets up and begins gathering all the items onto a tray. " Trust me, Bella, that is a story for another day, and one I will need at least a few bottles of wine and meditation to prepare for, but we will get there. Now come on, I have a few errands to run and you're going to join me.

…..

Rosalie has barely closed her front door before Edward begins his inquisition.

"How did things go with Rosalie today?" He asks as he pulls away from her driveway.

"You waste no time do you?" I groan. Edward rolls his eyes but continues his questioning.

"So?" he pushes.

"It was good. We talked for a little bit and then I went with her on a few errands. We stopped by a fabric store and got insane amounts of yarn for god knows what and then we stopped by a florist, the bank, and then Wal-Mart. Rosalie wanted to stop for food, but I wasn't hungry. Then you came to pick me up so yeah." I reply in a rush. Edward lets out a small growl under his breath.

"Aren't you eloquent?" He retorts. I watch as instead of heading towards the main road to get us home, he detours back off onto a side street.

"Um where are we going? This isn't the way home?"

"Just ride." He replies shortly.

"Edward!" I gasp exasperatedly.

"Bella!" he mimics but I am not amused. Edward rolls his eyes at me and taps the steering wheel.

"We're getting food."

"I told you I wasn't hungry. Turn around." I demand.

"Yeah, that was earlier and this is now. Besides, I'm hungry and I want to eat. If I'm getting something then so are you." He beams. My fingers twitch in annoyance.

"Ugh you're so frustrating! Take me home Edward, Phil is going to wonder where I am." I point to the time, signaling it was a quarter till nine.

"First, it's not like you have school tomorrow so chill, and…" he stops talking to me as he pulls out his phone and begins texting something. I fight the urge to tell him about the dangers of texting and driving but that argument is futile considering we're at a red light.

"Done!" Edward suddenly says. Throwing me his phone, I see he messaged Phil about stopping for food and that we'd be late coming home. I look at him incredulously just as his phone dings with Phil's reply 'to not rush and be safe.' I let out a deep breath.

Bastard: 1

Me: 0

Still holding onto his phone, I swipe through his contacts and I am not in the least shocked when I see that I'm listed as "Sweet cheeks". Rolling my eyes, I throw his phone back at him and growl when I see him pull up into the parking lot of some rustic looking diner that looked as if it had seen better days. Edward expertly parks and turns off the ignition. He looks at me and I cross my arms.

"I told you I'm not hungry."

"Fine, but I am and I'm going inside."

"You do that then." I retort.

"I'm sitting down to eat." Edward grunts as he opens his door and gets out.

"Whatever!" He nods and leans his head back in.

"Okay then. Just sit here, in the dark, and in the cold, where anybody can just walk up to you. Nothing wrong with a young, pretty, teenage girl sitting alone in the middle of the night." He finishes closing the door. I watch as he strides over to the front door. Edward looks back one more time with a smirk and disappears inside.

A part of my brain freezes on the fact Edward called me pretty while the other, more rational side, tries not to let his words rattle me, but a slight chill runs down my spine.

From the position of where we're parked, I can't see him at all. Maybe he was right about me being paranoid. Every little noise seems to unnerve me, and just when I think I'm going to prove him wrong, I hear a rustle and then a loud keening screech. I look around and don't see anything, figuring that it's just my nerves when I hear it again and this time, it's so loud, that I nearly scream. I nearly fall out of the car in my haste to pull my seatbelt off, I'm moving so quickly. I slam the door behind me and walk, no run towards the front door, nearly crashing into Edward, who was waiting in the seating area for me.

My nerves are so bad, that I don't care that he's right. I can feel my heart pounding in my ears as I grab onto him tightly.

Edward's triumphant grin turns into that of concern when he realizes how badly I'm shaking. He pulls me closer to him and I grab onto the ends of his shirt.

"Hey, hey, hey, talk to me Bella. What's wrong?" He asks. When I don't answer, he grabs my face in his hands to steady me. I want to shake my head for being so silly. I was probably overreacting over nothing. Edward waits for me to respond.

"I heard a noise and I guess it scared me more than I realized. It's sounded like crashing metal. I shudder. I inhale a few deep breaths, letting Edward's intoxicating scent ease my panic.

"It's probably from the nearby railroad tracks. Usually you can hear them coming but sometimes you can hear them in the distance and combined with the air blowing it can make a scary sound, so your fear was warranted but it's okay I should have warned you. " He tries to reassure letting go of my face. I let go of his shirt, realizing how silly I'm being and try to flatten down the wrinkles. Edward grabs my hand in his and I take another step back.

"Maybe I should go back to the car." I try to leave and he grabs me again, pulling me in front of him and getting the attention of a waitress.

"Table for two please." He quietly asks. The waitress looks dazed as she stares at the both of us; no doubt in awe of the pretty face before her but nods her head and gestures for us to follow behind her.

"Edward, no..." I moan but reluctantly follow him. The waitress moves us over to a nearby booth by the window, giving us a perfect view of the nearby bars and night stragglers. I sit on one side with Edward across from me. She hands us both a menu although I make no move to open up mine. The waitress asks for our drinks and I reluctantly request a glass of ice water while Edward gets a root beer.

Edward sighs loudly and opens up his menu. I watch as he looks over the menu briefly and sets it down. He looks at me expectedly and I stare at him back defiantly. We continue to stare at each other when the waitress returns with our drinks. She turns to face me and asks for my order. I shake my head. "Nothing for me." I reply. Edward glares at me as the waitress turns to face him with a broad grin.

"Get me two specials with all the fixings". He replies nicely ignoring her obvious attempt at flirting. The waitress feeling dejected, scribbles his order down, and walks away after telling us it'll be about fifteen minutes.

"Now let's try this again, you want to tell me how your day with Rosalie went?" He inquired again, taking a sip from his drink. I watch as his throat bobs; his tongue peeking out and moving against the ring in his lip.

"Sorry, can you say that again?" I asked distractedly. Edward looks amused but repeats himself.

"Tell me about your day with Rosalie." He says slowly.

"I told you already. Tell me about your day with Jane."

"Now you know I can't do that." He gripes and I sigh, because I know he's right. Edward continues to stare at me pointedly and I know it's just easier to talk to him and get the conversation over with. He was just as stubborn as I was. I take a sip of my water.

"Rosalie and I had tea, she told me a bit about how she and Vera met and their relationship." He nods his head.

"Vera's a wonderful woman. She's perfect for Rose. Not many are. " Edward suddenly makes a sour face.

"What?" He lets out a little laugh.

"She can be difficult at times."

"Rosalie? She's so sweet"

"More like sour." He blanches. I wait for him to continue but he looks as if he's struggling with what to say next.

"Come on Edward, there's no way you can just say that without explaining."

"Rosalie and I are a bit like oil and water. Don't get me wrong we're good friends but we often butt heads. You have to be a special person to deal with her."

"Why do you guys not get along?" I question. Edward shakes his head.

"We just didn't see eye to eye on a few things when we first met. Likes? Dislikes? Choices I seem to make. Everything seemed to be a battle with her. Plus she wasn't that trusting of people, men especially." He can see I want him to explain further and he reluctantly tells me he can't.

"I know Rosalie probably hasn't told you yet. I'll let her tell you her story herself and then if you have any lingering questions afterward that you're afraid to ask her, then I'll try to clear some things up." He finishes just as the waitress returns with what looks like the largest burger possible with a load of fries covered in onions and gravy and a chocolate shake. I'm so in awe of the large meal that it escapes my attention that the waitress has placed a similar plate in front of me. She hands us a bunch of napkins before walking away. I glare at Edward for what feels like the millionth time tonight.

"Didn't I say I wasn't hungry?" I moan, trying to ignore the fact that my mouth had begun watering at the smell of the greasy food. Edward gives me a knowing look as he puts a few fries into his mouth.

"Sure you are." He grins through a mouthful.

"I'm not." Naturally in my fight against Edward, my stomach betrays me by growling loudly.

"Sure you aren't hungry Sweet Cheeks." He grabs a fry and waves it in front of my face. I growl and snatch it from his hands and stick the offending but delicious fry in my mouth. Edward beams at me triumphantly.

"Ugh, I hate you." I shove a few more fries in my mouth.

Bastard: 2

Me: 0

"No you don't." He says simply. I say nothing. Maybe I did at first, but now I'm not sure if I did anymore. My feelings towards Edward were often conflicting these days. One second I was annoyed by his very breathing and other moments, I wanted him close to me when things in my world started to get dark. He had been so accommodating to me as of late and seemed to take my mini tantrums in stride.

One could even say that maybe Edward and I were slowly but surely becoming friends.

I tell Edward a few more odds and ends about my day and before I know it, I have eaten all the fries, half the burger, and drunk a quarter of the shake. Edward has finished all his food. He pats his stomach with a contented sigh. He ignores my attempts of paying for my meal and throws a few bills down on the table.

He reaches out his hand for me to take and I calmly wrap mine around his.

"Come on, let's hit the road."

...WTF…

"This is hard!" I groan, trying to get the yarn to cooperate. Rosalie laughs as she expertly crosses the yarn into an intricate loop on one of the needles she's holding.

I look down at my fourth attempt at the tangled mass of yarn. "Yeah, this is not going well. I'm surprised I haven't stabbed myself by now. I should stop while I'm ahead." Rosalie looks down at the mess of knots I created and sighs.

"Well you started off good if that helps." She tries to reassure. I let out a small laugh.

"Let's face it, I suck, big time." Rosalie giggles and takes the needles from my hands and gestures to the assorted bags and female items strewn across her floor.

"Maybe you should just assemble the bags instead." She sits back down on the chair and continues knitting the pair of gloves she was showing me how to make. Her fingers flew in quick, practiced movements; making consecutive interlocking loops in less time than it took me to make one.

I look back at the ground at all the various items we'd purchased earlier in the week. Various travel-sized items including soap, shampoo/conditioner, toothpaste, a small toothbrush, and a comb. Along with the health and hygiene items, were the gloves she was knitting, her business card, non-perishable snacks, and oddly enough a few rolls of quarters?

I looked up at her for directions. I wasn't sure where to start. Rosalie stops knitting and instructs me to put one of each item in the bags along with a few quarters. I looked at her again, there had to be at least fifty of each. She shrugs her shoulders and without waiting for another response, I begin putting one of each item in the bag, adding a few quarters in the end. I grab a piece of ribbon and tie it off in a bow. Rosalie doesn't seem to object at my attempts and I manage to make three bags before she suddenly speaks.

"I'm sure you're wondering why we're making these bags, right?" She inquires. I nod my head.

"Well you know I work with students at the high school as a guidance counselor and as a mentor in Esme's program, but I also volunteer at a battered woman's shelter.

"May I ask why the women's shelter?" I continue grabbing items to put in the bags. Rosalie stops knitting and looks off with a faraway gleam in her eyes.

"It was the first place that opened its arms to me when I tried to get away from my husband. "

"I told you about my mother right?"

"The blonde Alexis Colby?" I repeat. Rosalie nods her head and lets out an un-humorless laugh.

"That's one way of describing it. My mother is…. was… my best friend, and at the time, I was impressionable and wanted nothing more than to make her proud, even at the cost of my own happiness. I was raised pretty much by my nanny, so attention from my mother was rare."

"My prim and proper mother was horrified at the prospect of her only daughter being a lesbian that she shoved me towards anything that would stop me from my 'repulsive' ways. That's how I met Royce King." Rosalie starts. I immediately think about the photo on the wall and she shakes her head as if she could see the questions I wanted to ask.

"This story is difficult for me, so if I may suggest, you let me get this all out at once, and then you can ask your questions." Rosalie looks back down at her lap and continues knitting.

"In an attempt to deflect me from my "gayness" as she put it, she entered me into beauty pageants."

"Wow…" I gasp. "Aren't they mostly female?" I can't help but ask. She rolls her eyes.

"Ironic right? My mother thought she was doing something by that, hoping the structure and competitiveness of pageants could benefit me and help me attract suitors. That's how I met Royce; he was one of the judges and he quickly became interested in little old me."

"That's kind of inappropriate."

"Yeah, well we can save the conversation about the sexual objectification of young girls by predatory men and narcissist women for another day. I thought nothing much of his interest in me, considering he was nearly twenty years older than me, and yet, my mother, ahem Evelyn, pushed me towards him any chance she could get. I thought she was putting him on as my coach, but I already had one. I would see him here and there until eventually he was constantly making appearances and was making personal visits to my home."

"He was always with my mother so I never really paid him any mind. I tried to avoid him at first, and while I knew deep down that I was attracted to women, Royce was a bit of a sweet talker, handsome too if you like that Richard Gere/George Clooney type and before I knew it, he somehow had me under his spell. I'm sorry for all these celebrity references but that's the easiest way to describe it. I was young, naïve, and a bit vulnerable with whom I was at the time, and they both preyed upon that insecurity. This led to me somehow growing to tolerate his company and before I knew it, I was eighteen with a giant ass engagement ring on my finger. An arranged marriage. Crazy right?"

I nod my head. Rosalie's lips quiver for a moment.

"It seems like such an archaic notion, but you'd be surprised at how common it is today. My mother had basically sold me off to the highest bidder and Royce was the winner."

" As for our wedding, I honestly can't remember a single detail of that day, except for the feeling of being claustrophobic and wishing that I could just disappear for one moment. I didn't have control over anything. She picked the colors, the food, even the people. All I had to do was show up and for some reason I did. You should have seen her, she was so proud of me that day and I never have seen her beam so big. All I wanted was her acceptance and that day I got it."

"It was one of the biggest spectacles in the city at the time. You should have seen the announcement in the newspapers. 'Socialite Evelyn Hale, the mother of the bride, is pleased to announce her beautiful daughter's upcoming marriage to one of the most prominent men in Rochester, New York, finance analyst Royce King'. Not one mention of my name nor my young age, but a focus on the fact that I was a beauty meant to do nothing but be a trophy wife. Realizing it now, my wedding was more for her than for me. Nevertheless, I tried to go into this relationship with being open-minded."

"We were married for less than three days when he first struck me." My breath suddenly catches in my throat. Rosalie stops knitting and looks over at the wall, her blue eyes drifting slowly towards that picture at the end.

"We'd been on our honeymoon; up at some clubhouse up in the Hamptons where we met up with a group of his associates and their wives. When he wasn't supervising prepubescent girls, he was well known amongst the elite social circles, as a bit of a playboy, but also someone who liked structure and hated when things didn't go his way. I found out about the latter, the hard way. Royce and one of his friends were talking about something business-related and I'd merely corrected him on the pronunciation of a word when he struck his hand out and slapped me. He had hit me so hard that I fell against one of the nearby tables and shattered a few of the wine glasses."

" I was in complete and utter shock. I will forever remember how quickly my mouth filled with blood and fighting the urge to gag as my face throbbed. I also vividly remember how no one did anything. Everyone kept drinking and talking as if nothing were out of the ordinary. Royce just laughed and told me to go clean myself up."

" You should have seen how fast I scurried away to the restroom. I was horrified, he had struck me. I'd cleaned myself up to the best of my ability, ignoring the angry red welt on the side of my face and busted lip. I decided not to go back to the party and went back to the house we were staying at. I'd planned on leaving that night, and returning home to my mother; hoping I would never see him again."

"I had managed to pack most of my belongings when Royce caught up to me. I wanted to scream and throw things at him. I think I did, but as I said, Royce was a smooth talker. He came in that night crying and apologetic, owning his actions up to alcohol and the fear of scrutiny from his peers. He begged on his hands and knees that he would never do that to me again and like a dummy, I forgave him. Up until that point, he had never given me any indication of being abusive. I knew his job brought on stress so I tried to rationalize his actions. As his wife, I was supposed to support him not embarrass him."

"Royce wasn't aggressive or nasty to me for the remainder of our honeymoon so maybe it was a fluke? I wasn't sure, but then again I was on edge most of the time trying not to set him off. I even tried telling my mother what happened but she just shrugged it off as something to be expected, as if it were my fault Royce has struck me."

"All I could think was, wasn't your husband supposed to honor, love, and protect you?"

"This would continue on and off and eventually, it became a vicious cycle. He'd hit me and I'd run away, promising myself that I wouldn't let him toss me around anymore. Royce would find me and I would forgive him. We'd return home and everything would be going well or so I thought until he would hit me again."

"Royce liked to drink and boy did he drink. He would come home at late hours of the night, and I'd try to be the dutiful wife to him. I'd run his bath, have dinner on the table, but he always found something to complain about. The water is too hot, his food, not hot enough."

"It was always something with him and at that point in our marriage, I wasn't good for anything…well, maybe sex. He didn't care about my wants or needs, it was only about his own satisfaction. I would scream and plead for him to stop but he would just continue. I won't go into many details about that, as you're minor, but let me tell you this Bella." She leans over and grabs my hand.

"Married or not, if you do not give your consent, that is rape. Husband or boyfriend be damned. I wished I knew that sooner rather than later but I was naïve and afraid of being lonely. Ironic that I felt more alone than ever being married than I did when I was alone.

The alcohol brought on mood swings but also the truth. Many nights of his drunken ramblings revealed that he was laundering money in some big Ponzi scheme with some other investors. I knew it was only a matter of time before it caught up to him and he knew it too. Every time Royce tried to hurt me, I knew I could hurt him too with the information I knew. I would once again convince myself to leave and he would lure me into a false sense of security where I didn't."

"It was after one horrific night, where he left me nearly dead that I called the cops. He'd realized I knew about his laundering scheme and accused me of snooping around and even worse, cheating on him with one of colleagues for information. Royce beat me to the point that it felt like blinking was a hassle. I don't remember all I said that day on the phone, I just remember waking up in the hospital with him at my side. He'd lied and told the cops that there was a break-in and I had been caught in the line of fire."

"I wondered how the cops and doctors could believe him when they had all the evidence in front of them, but Royce had his ways and the money to back it up. I'd barely been discharged when I ran and hid out at one of the women's shelters in the city. They never asked questions but were always there to offer me a helping hand, even when I didn't understand why I needed it. They even helped me file a report against him in another precinct. I called my mother begging and pleading for help like a little girl but she just ignored me. I had never felt so alone. She of course called Royce to come get me and when he did, I dumbly forgave him. I ended up dropping the charges." Rosalie mumbles quietly and her lips quiver.

"Why?" I gasped. She couldn't be serious. After all that? Rosalie lets out a deep breath.

"Stupid right? I was weak and with an even more fragile mindset with no one to turn to. My mother was no help, and my friends had all but deserted me. All I had was Royce. Even though he was hurting me, I was more in fear of being alone. I know what you're thinking. I have to be the dumbest woman in the world for returning back to him, but he was all I knew."

"Before I knew it, three years of my life had passed by."

"Royce controlled every facet of my life. What I wore, what I dressed like. I was already a shell of my former self, but now I simply existed, just trying to make it through the next minute, then an hour, and eventually a day. It was on another one of Royce's 'business trips' that I met Esme."

"She and Carlisle were visiting for some conference in the city and she was visiting one of the private bistros we were at, to grab lunch for the both of them. She witnessed Royce belittling me over some stupid comment I made and had roughly shoved me into a seat by pulling my hair. Shortly afterward, he and some of his men went off to smoke leaving me alone, and that's when she approached me. She saw the bruises that I was barely trying to conceal with makeup and my near too-thin frame."

"I was of course afraid and at a loss of what to do, as Royce didn't like me talking to people who he didn't know. I was terrified to even tell her my name, that's how brainwashed I was. Esme in her calming demeanor didn't do anything but grab my hand and sit with me. I don't know what it was about her, but for the first time in several years I felt comfort from someone other than myself. When her food came, she gave me a meaningful look and gave me the sweetest hug. I can still remember the words she whispered to me right before Royce returned.

"Don't be afraid to run, be afraid to stay." She'd left me her card and told me to call her if I ever needed anything. Little did I know that I'd be contacting her sooner rather than later."

"The final straw or what I like to call the last night of my life with Royce was when he once again came in drunk and belligerent, but this time he wasn't alone. He'd brought one of his friends back and I could tell that the both of them were high off god knows what. Royce once again got mad at some nonexistent thing that I did before and attacked me, eventually raping me afterward. His friend was off in the corner jerking off and I knew then, that if I didn't stop it right then and there, his friend would no doubt hurt me too. I don't know what strength I found in myself that day, but I wasn't going to let him hurt me anymore. I can't remember what I grabbed; all I knew was that one-second he was on top of me and the next, he was slumped on the ground. I didn't care if he was dead or alive and his friend was passed out in a chair, not even bothering to close his pants."

"I ran that night, ignoring the bruises and pain I felt throughout my body. I didn't care about my stuff; the clothes, jewelry, anything. I ran with the clothes on my back and grabbed the first taxi I could to get myself out of the city, ignoring the cabbie's protests to take me to a hospital. I knew I couldn't go to my mother, she would just rat me out, and nowhere in the city would be safe since Royce had so many connections."

I was frantic, trying to think of my next move when I remembered the amazing woman who did nothing but offer me some comfort. I called and the relief that spread through my body when she answered is something I'll never forget. I told Esme what happened and she and Carlisle immediately wanted me to go to a hospital, but I couldn't. My insurance was under him and I knew Royce would find me. I also knew that if he caught up to me this time, he would never let me leave him again.

"Ignoring almost everything ethically possible, Esme and Carlisle bought me a plane ticket that very night and before I knew it, I was across the country in a small town in Washington. When I arrived at the airport, Esme didn't ask questions…I mean I wasn't sure that I could give her the answers if she did, but despite it all, she offered me her kindness and eventually her home. Carlisle looked me over at his home office, looking over the superficial bruises and revealed to me some of the most shocking news. I was pregnant." Rosalie lets out a deep breath.

"As you can see, there's no baby. I never thought of myself much as a mother, having resenting my own for her overbearing ways, but I wanted that baby. I wanted it so bad, so that I could subject it to a life full of love and that no matter what he or she decided to do in their life, I would be behind them 100% of the way. It didn't matter that it was a part of Royce, it was also a part of me; and that made all the difference."

"Weeks went on in my pregnancy and for once, I thought something good could come from this. Unfortunately for me, my body had other ideas. Years of sexual and physical abuse from my husband had done a number on me. Old fractures that never really healed. I miscarried less than a week into my second trimester. I blamed myself."

"It is not your fault." I reply incredulously.

"I know that now. This could have happened to any woman, but for me, I took it as a personal attack of not being stronger to leave my husband the first time he hurt me. A few weeks turned into months and I was still physically and mentally drained; this time at my own hands. I was terrified of every little noise I heard, even more, terrified being around men I didn't know. There were days where Esme had to physically pull me out of the bed just so I could bathe or eat. Getting up seemed to be a hassle and to me, it seemed like what was the point? Why go through another day if it was going to cause me pain?"

"So what changed? What made you decide to keep going?" I question.

" I woke up one day and told myself that I was still letting Royce win. The control he had over me was still hindering my life, even though I had gotten away from him. I needed to take my life back for myself, and put my own wants and needs first. Don't get me wrong, it wasn't easy. It took many years of therapy and finding people who truly love me for me, to realize that I would be okay. Hell, I'm still working on being completely comfortable with myself. Rome, wasn't built in a day." She finishes just as I tie off the last bag.

"What about that photo? Why is it on the wall?" I question. Rosalie looks over and frowns.

"Well, I normally don't have it out, it's more so of what it symbolizes. On one hand, it serves as a reminder of how far I've come and on the other; it reminds me of the person I never want to be again. It shows you how appearances can be deceiving and that sometimes you have to look a little deeper."

"So what happened to Royce? If you don't mind me asking."

"You can ask. Carlisle set me up with one of his attorneys, a Mr. Jenks I think was his name. Anyway, he had done some work for Esme with Edward and…."

"Wait did you say Edward?" I interrupt. Rosalie smirks.

"Yes I did and if you're trying to fish out information, I'm sorry to tell you, you won't find it here."

"Ugh, he said the same about you. I'm sorry." I apologize. She giggles and rolls her eyes.

"Edward aside," she gives me a pointed look. " Jenks did some stuff for them and was more than willing to help me with my situation. Apparently law enforcement had been trying to take Royce down for a long time. Since he had the local P.D in his back pocket, many of his crimes often got pushed aside. Fortunately for us, the case against him had been building for a long time. The best part was that one of his so-called associates was actually an undercover cop who had been gathering evidence on Royce and his men for almost two years. All the evidence was there, they just needed witnesses."

"I didn't want to ever see him again, but I knew I had to do something so that he could never hurt another soul again. That asshole hadn't even told anyone that I had left him, instead telling everyone that I had ran off after he'd caught me cheating. My reputation was in tatters back home, but I didn't care. I wish I had been smarter and kept record of all the injuries he gave me, but Jenks assured me that there was enough material to put him away for a while. I offered my testimony with all the information I knew and along with the evidence they gathered, it was enough to put him and all those involved behind bars.

"How long did he get?"

"130 years" She smirks.

"Holy shit!" I gasp and I cover my mouth with my hands. "I'm sorry"

"It's fine. I think he deserved more than that, but I find comfort in knowing he will never see the light of day again. As I was still his wife at the time, they tried giving me his assets that weren't repossessed by the government but I didn't want them."

"So what did you do?"

"Sold them off and donated the funds to various charities. I didn't want that blood money on my hands. I did keep the ring though…well for a little bit but I pawned it off." Rosalie looks at her ring finger and wiggles it.

"This was back when I was pregnant. I was going to put the money aside for them to inherit one day but you know how that turned out. Turns out Royce had expensive taste. The diamond alone was worth a quarter of a million dollars." My jaw drops dramatically.

"That was my reaction too. Unlike the money before, I decided to keep it, although I don't use that money for my own personal gain." Rosalie gestures to the ball of yarn and bags on the floor. "The stuff you see here is what I spend it on. The same money he used to steal and hurt me is now going to help others."

"And what about your mother, do you still speak to her?"

"Occasionally. I get a call every now and then. She's still self-centered as ever, but that's to be expected. Some people just aren't meant to be parents and I've accepted that."

"But can you forgive her? I mean, for pushing you onto Royce?" My mouth becomes dry as I finish my question. Rosalie gives me a pointed look and sets down her knitting.

"I do forgive her. Bella, despite it all, I love my mother, but I can never forget what the hurt she caused me. For years I blamed myself for her actions; maybe if I were a more "normal" daughter and not some "freak" that liked girls, maybe she would have been around more or wouldn't have pushed so hard for me to like Royce. It took me a very long time to realize, that I was not responsible for her actions. I didn't make my mother or even Royce the bad guy, they did it themselves." I look at her in disbelief.

"Yes I forgave my mother and even Royce, but that was more for myself than her. Don't get me wrong it wasn't easy. Royce is a piece of crap and my mother is the poster child of egotism and she knows it, but I don't want to be like them. I don't want to hold onto the hate forever; it'll just repeat the cycle."

"I don't think I can forgive my mother… or my father. " I quietly whisper.

"And no one is asking you to. If you do, then great, and if you don't, then that's okay too. Getting better is not contingent upon it."

"No it isn't great. I hate my mother. I hate my father and it is my fault." I gasp, feeling panicky. Rosalie grabs both of my hands.

" You are not responsible for your mother and father's actions. Look if you want to talk about that night then…" I snatch my hands from her grasp and get up.

"I don't want to talk about it."

"You need to eventually, otherwise all that hate is going to build up inside and…"

"I said no! In fact, I think I'm ready to go home, can you call my uncle please." Seeing that I am officially over this conversation, Rosalie sighs and helps me begin gathering the bags from the floor.

"I'm sorry if I pushed you, that wasn't my attention. Sometimes I can get a little pushy. I really have enjoyed our time so far together this week. If anything, I hope you learned one thing from my story."

"What? That there's always a way out? That didn't exactly end well for my parents."

"No Bella, even if you may not understand it now, I hope you learned that it's not the trauma that defines us, its how we choose to react act to it and how we choose to move on."

"I changed my ending, and so can you."

And it's Friday night and it's kicking in
And I can't dress, they're gonna crucify me
Oh, you and all your vibrant youth
How could anything bad ever happen to you?
You make a fool of death with your beauty, and for a moment
I forget to worry

Boy that was a long one! I hope you enjoyed it. Next chapter we get a little more Rosalie, a lot more Edward, and a new mentor.

(I promise it won't take 3 years this time)

Thoughts? Leave it in a review!

Xoxo

Sylvia Cullen