I'm Sorry. I fell in love with you.
In the past, I've always did what my mother wanted, thinking that. She'll love me back when I've completed what she wanted. But in the end she never truly loved me. After all who would love a person like me? I'm just a failed clone who could not do anything her creator wanted. I'm just a hateful vessel that holds the memories of someone close to her.
Then you came extending your hands towards me. You saved me from the everlasting torture that is I. You told me that I was not just a clone, a vessel that holds someone else's memories and that I am who I am. I ended up grabbing hold of your hands and a future was made for me.
Thanks to you I was able to have a family. One's that I could truly come to call 'Family'. They were the first person who truly made me feel like I was not someone else and that love for a family member could be truly comfortable and great. However I still knew deep within me that this are moments that would not last long and that it would be broken because of me.
That is why I have always made sure that I was not fully connected to them yet still there to participate in a position that they would not feel truly left out. However even that was wrong and you pointed that out to me. You told me that I could trust them that they are not like 'Mother'. That they truly loved me and that no matter what happen they would love me for me.
I ended up listening to what you said and you were right. They did love me like how you said they did and that broke through the wall I put for them to cross. But then something else started to blossom after that.
I did not know if it was infatuation or respect that started it but I knew that it started growing after you helped me broke the wall. You worm yourself inside my heart and before I knew it I could not face or look straight into your eyes anymore. Just the thought of you nearby give me this warm yet frightening felling of comfort and my heart would start to beat crazily that it hurt's.
I then made my choice to avoid you for the duration that I thought would calm the craze in my heart but it backfired. The longer I tried to avoid you the stronger the pain grew in my heart. So I acted like I didn't even tried to avoid you. I could see the worry in your eyes but I decided to ignore it, just like how I ignored the pain in my heart.
Then my heart got ripped apart when you suddenly told me you were dating someone. It hurt's. It truly really hurt but I couldn't show you that, not when I know you'll get hurt too. So I decided once more to keep it in and congratulate you. You smiled. Oh how I love it when you smile even now when I know that your smile won't be cause by me.
Each day that pass by you were practically radiating with a smile on your face. I'm happy at least that's what I told myself I was. I started to drift away from you for I could not hold the yearning in. Even though I know your happy this yearning in me still keeps on growing and once more I decided to give way.
It happened on that night. I wonder if you could still remember that night. It was the night I kill 'Fate' who was your bestfriend. The night you were captured by my overflowing feelings. The very night that you lost your innocence's to the devil which is I. And the night when I disappeared from your sight.
I wonder. I know that you hated me now. I couldn't even feel the guilt as I saw you squirm under me, as you cry out for me to stop. All I remember was that you were in my arms and you will forever bear the mark of my touch on your body. I could still remember as well your tear filled face when I left you not that you could remember for by then you have already fainted from my ministration.
I could look back at that memory and cry myself to exhaustion. I'm a monster for what I have done to you. I accepted the fact then that I was truly a monster. For you who had saved my life and showed me a future to be tormented in my hands would you say that I am not a monster yourself? Hearing it coming from you would surely be a relief if ever.
I wonder. It's that time of year again. I truly wonder if you'd remember but the day when I first called out your name. The day we became friends but who am I kidding? You hate a monster like me for sure so why remember the day you would consider the day you made the greatest mistake of your life the day we you accepted me as a friend. So safe to say you would not visit the places that would remind you of someone like me a monster.
So it would be safe to visit those places wouldn't it? Just to remind me of the good times before I committed that horrible sin. Surely you would not come to those places anymore. So it would be safe for me to visit without you seeing me.
Ah so nostalgic, right now I'm on that bridge where we first became friends. Nothing seems to have change here. I looked out toward the sea. I could hear the waves hitting the side of the bridge. It relaxes me so much that I almost forgot that this is the last place, I'll be seeing before I truly disappear on your life as well as the others.
As I remember the good times for this might be the last. I failed to sense someone approaching. Heck this is a free bridge anyone could pass by and maybe I'm confident that the person I once love who might hate me like no tomorrow would definitely not go here today of all day for short I let my guard completely down.
Before I realizes someone was hugging me from behind. Shit someone caught me. I tried to struggle from the one who was hugging me only to freeze up when the girl called my name. How could this be happening to me? Of all the person who could have caught me why does it have to be her? Why did she even come here on the first place? Why?
Then suddenly I felt something wetting my back. She's crying? Why is she crying for someone like me? She should be loathing me? She should me angry at me so why is she crying on my back? Is this some kind of new torture for me? Once more I tried to struggle but she just keeps on hugging me like she doesn't want me to leave. What the hell is wrong here?
She keep on mentioning my name as I struggle to let lose. If this was before I could have love this feeling. After all Nanoha was hugging me like there's no tomorrow. The sad thing is this is not like before because now I'm nothing but a monstrous being. I don't deserve this person who is holding on to me. I must run away. I stop struggling for a minute and call out her name. I know I don't have the right to call her name anymore after what I've done to her but this is the only way. As soon as she heard me call out her name she momentarily loosens her hold on me and I took that chance to run away.
But before I could run away I heard her call out my name. It was choked, broken and desperate that I could not help but look back. She was sitting on the cemented floor of the bridge. Her eyes were full of tears making her once clear sapphire blue eyes cloudy. Once more my heart was torn. Why does she cry for me like this? I'm a monster doesn't she understand that. She should be loathing in anger in my presence not crying like this?
She continued to call my name in desperation all the while telling me not to leave. I watch her cry from my position not able to neither run away nor come near her. After what seems like years she stood up. I was stack in my position permanently. I watch her walk towards me tears still falling from her eyes making them redden.
When she was near me she hugged me. She continued to cry as she calls me stupid. I continue to act like a statue as she starts hitting my chest.
"Stupid, stupid, stupid Fate-chan. Why did you suddenly leave me like that? I thought I'd never see you again. Did you know how much I worried when you suddenly disappeared like that?" she said as she continues to cry on my chest.
I then called out her name shakily. She looked up at me and she gasped. I guess she saw the fear in my eyes as well as my other untold emotion. I know because she knows me better than I know myself.
"Fate-chan are you afraid I'd be angry about 'that'." She said as she continues to look me in the eyes.
I felt my throat constrict making me unable to speak so I nodded instead. She then hugged me harder and she continued to whisper Stupid.
"I don't care about that anymore because when I thought I'd never see you again I felt worse than dying. Ne Fate-chan you probably won't believe me but… I love you."
Those words that I've longed to hear from her made me unable to hold back anymore. I hugged her tight and I cried. I cried like I've never cried before. She was startled by my sudden outburst I just knew it. But after her initial shock subsided she started to slowly pat my back while telling me everything would be fine.
I continued to cry for a few more second. Then I looked at her and I told her what I've never been able to tell her before.
"I love you."
I poured all my feelings in that one sentence as I look her in the eye. Her eyes were once more tearful but the expression that I could read in her eyes told me that she was not sad instead she was glad. Her eyes sparkled even though there slightly teary. I couldn't help but smile. For someone like me to be loved by an angel like her is nothing more than a miracle to me.
"I love you, Fate"
"I love you too, Nanoha"
And with that we seal our love with each other with a kiss.
~0~
Omake
Raven: Don't you think I've done a wonderful job on this one Hime.
Hime: Yeah right.
Narrator: The door suddenly opens and in came a fuming Nanoha while on her back was a crying Fate.
Nanoha: How dare you make my Fate chan a villain?
Fate: (grabbing Nanoha on the back) I'm sorry Nanoha. I'm so sorry.
Nanoha: See what you'd done to My Fate-chan. Raging Heart
RH: Stand By, Ready, Set up. Shooting mode, Condition all green. I can be shot, My master.
Nanoha: Starlight…..
Hime: Why do I have to get blasted with you again? I just knew you'd be the cause of my death someday.
Raven: What you agreed with it? At least we get to go down together.
Nanoha: BREAKER….
Narrator: Raven and Hime were once more blown by a Starlight breaker making them fly away with the explosion.
Nanoha: There, There Fate-chan the bad guys are all gone now.(patting the back of the crying Fate)
Fate: (looking at Nanoha with a cute teary eyed expression) Really?
…..
Narrator: A blushing Nanoha drags a confuse Fate by the hand towards their shared room. As for the rest it's history. (Due to the fact that I don't want to die. I've decided not to narrate what happened behind closed doors.)
Behind close door
Fate: Nanoha wha..what are you doing?
Nanoha: Nyahaha
Fate: aaahhhnnnnnnn
Narrator: (sweat drops) My ears! My poor virgin Earrrrssss!
Raven and Hime from where they fell after the devastating Starlight breaker attack.
Raven: Remind me never to make Fate the emo villain on my next fanfic okay….
Hime: Remind me to never ever come with you the next time you right an angsty fic okay…
Narrator: And the two lost consciousness in the crater were they fell….
Somewhere on the Roof of a building a certain short haired brunette giggles.
Hayate: Those amateur never did learn. Hehehehe I'm so gonna get reach for this…
Suddenly from a certain window a starlight breaker was fired..
Hayate: Shot they found me…. (jumping of the building while setting up her barrier jacket)
Nanoha: I knew she'd be spying again. I was shock when I saw that picture she took last time. This time I was prepared..Nyahahaha
Fate: Na…no…ha
The brunette looked at the out of breath Fate for a sec before jumping the blonde..
Fate: Aaahhhnnnn
~0~
I hope you enjoy this small tribute. I apologize for not being able to update sooner.
I don't own any of the MGLN character and this fic is purely for entertainment purpose only. I don't earn money for it.
Please keep on reading my stories and please leave some review just so I'd be more inspired to write.
Thanks
