Disclaimer: Touhou is owned by ZUN in conjunction with Team Shanghai Alice.

A/N: Hi.

This story was inspired by "Gensokyo Archives: Death Files" snuff fic by Azure Xuchilbara. However, unlike that story this one is completely serious, offensive, unfunny, hateful and overall pretty fucked up. But then again, it is subjective. Maybe you'll find the story heartwarming, silly and not fucked up in the slightest. Your mileage may vary.

Let's begin.

Chapter 1: Uncommon cold

[… … … … … … … … … … … … …]

"Did you hear? It's Spring! Spring has come, everyone! Spring!"

Lily White glided through the human village, smiling broadly and declaring for gods know what time that indeed, spring has definitely come to Gensokyo and absolutely everyone must celebrate.

The villagers mostly groaned, putting fake smiles on their faces when the fairy flew nearby. And they had pretty good reason for that, because if Lily spotted someone who was looking unhappy, like for example a weary crate carrier after a hard day of work, she immediately announced to him the event of spring arrival by shooting a spray of bullets. The bullets stung, and sometimes left minor burns and bruises that took a few days to heal, so people tried to cheer along.

"Hey, everyone! You know what? Spring has come! It is here, the Spring! Spring!"

"Aw, shuddup!"

The cry came from a dirty and drunk man in torn clothes who was taking a nap in a broken barrel by the road. He crawled out and unevenly stood up, holding an empty bottle in his hand. Lily turned to him.

"You fuckin' stupid white fairy with yer spring, my buddy fuckin' froze to death three nights ago! So shut up!"

"But that was still winter!" Lily exclaimed, unfazed. "And now it's Spring! Come on, look around, grass is growing, birds are chirping and—"

"SHUT THE FUCK UP!"

The man clumsily threw the bottle and it flew threw the air, missing Lily and shattering on the house wall behind her. The fairy put her hand up, creating a small energy sphere. She was still smiling.

"Now now, don't be so upset, it's Spring after all! Cheer with me!"

The blast of danmaku hit the man in the chest, knocking him down. He shouted and tried to stand up when another blast hit him in the face. His scream was cut; he crumpled like a ragdoll and fell forward, sprawling facedown on the side of the road.

A family of three walked from around the corner of a nearby house. Apparently, the parents were distracted by their over-energetic daughter, because they missed the sizzling of energy and walked nearly right into battle. They stopped dead in their tracks when they saw what was happening of course, but it was too late. Lily had spotted them.

"Spring!" She announced, rotating in the air and creating another sphere.

"Spring!" The little girl shouted, spreading her arms wide and running forward. The energy sphere disappeared in a blast of festive sparks and Lily cheerfully circled around a genuinely happy girl, showering her with illusionary flowers.

They danced like that for a while, in their own little world where everything was bright and happy and nothing bad ever happened. They danced, and a shallow pool of blood slowly spread under the unmoving man at the side of the road. They danced until the terrified parents pulled their daughter away, plastic smiles on their faces.

Lily released a happy sigh. So many more to announce the coming of spring to, so little time. She flashed a smile to the family that was slowly backing away from her and continued down the village road, forgetting about the incident with a drunk nearly instantly.

Spring has come. That's all that mattered.

[… … … … … … … … … … … …]

Aya felt uneasy. True, it wasn't her first visit to Moriya shrine, but giant stone pillars that supported the main building and the shrine itself, built from roughly hewn grey stones were still a magnificent and foreboding sight to behold.

However, her uneasiness did not come from that, if anything the grandiose building piqued her professional instincts as a photographer. No, the residents of the shrine were the true cause of her uneasiness.

Not Suwako of course. The little girl goddess could be seen in the distance, chasing butterflies on the meadow far below. She radiated power, ancient, primordial power but that was exactly that – just power of nature, without shape or alignment. The power in front of her was different, it was oppressing her, weighting on her shoulders and ordering her to kneel.

"Shameimaru Aya," Kanako said, pronouncing tengu's full name slowly, as if savoring the taste. "It's early for your monthly report, is it not? And still you bother me."

Aya winced. The active goddess of the Moriya shrine didn't look one tiny bit like she was preoccupied with something important, reclining lazily on a mound of pillows near the shrine entrance, a chess board in front of her. Her dress was crumpled and there was a prominent wine stain on her blouse.

"Kanako-san… sama" Aya started, stumbling on an honorary suffix. The aura of the goddess intensified, jumping from uncomfortable to nearly crushing. Aya cleared her throat and shifted, trying to hide the slight trembling of her knees. "Kanako-sama, you asked me to report any significant unusual accidents. Yesterday…"

"I ordered you," Kanako corrected, looking Aya right in the eyes. "I do not ask. I give orders, and you obey. The fact that you receive money afterwards is in no way indication of your freedom."

She broke eye contact and the crushing presence lifted a little. Aya took an opportunity to inhale. Below, Suwako caught a butterfly and was now holding it in her hands, eyeing the insect with curiosity.

"Proceed," Kanako ordered.

"R-right." Aya produced a leather-bound package from her sash. She managed to control her voice, and spoke in a tone of a professional news reporter. "As I said, yesterday a terrible tragedy befell the human village farthest from the Hakurei shrine. Four people were killed and more than a dozen injured in a string of terrible danmaku accidents."

Kanako suddenly sat upright and leaned forward. Her face obtained almost predatory look. "Danmaku, you say?"

"Y-yes," Aya stumbled again, but again controlled herself and continued. "Apparently, the safe bursts of Lily White for some unknown reasons gained in power and became lethal to humans. This is particularly jarring considering the fact that last week another spell card related incident took lives of—"

"I know what happened last week," Kanako cut her off. "What of Reimu? Has she recovered from her illness?"

"No, Kanako-sama. In fact, her condition is rapidly worsening. She fainted in the shrine courtyard the day before yesterday and her coughing fits last longer and longer every day. I've got some photos here."

Aya stepped forward, no longer able to control her trembling. Thankfully, Kanako's attention was on the bundle she gave her, and Aya took the opportunity to quickly step back. Kanako didn't seem to notice, tearing into the leather and hungrily producing a thick bunch of photos.

She started flipping through them, her expression turning more and more bestial with every card. Then, she stopped on one photo and turned it back to show Aya. "Is this is what I'm thinking it is?"

"Uh… yes, she coughed out blood yesterday, just like before. Sorry, it's a bit overexposed and the focus is slightly off but I think I managed to capture the exact moment—"

She was cut off when Kanako suddenly burst into laughter and threw all the other photos up in the air. The wind latched onto them and they fluttered like leaves, falling to the ground. Naturally, some of them came to rest facing up and each and every one of them showed Reimu, a weak, ill and pale Reimu, coughing or lying under her futon with a wet cloth on her forehead.

Aya took a few steps back. She knew Kanako had her moods, but this was way too much. This laugh of hers… it was plainly evil, a laugh of a megalomaniacal lunatic. More than anything at that moment, Aya just wanted to get away and never to return.

Kanako stopped laughing and put the photo down. "And so, the time has come," she stated, looking somewhere in the distance.

"K-kanako-s-sama, I should really get going," Aya stuttered and instantly regretted it as the goddess turned her attention back to her. However, her menacing aura lifted and her expression softened.

"You did a good job, Shameimaru," Kanako said, and her voice had some warmth in it as well. "You deserve a bonus for your skill and discretion. I'll tell Sanae to give you double pay for this month."

"Thank you, Kanako-sama," Aya meekly said, bowing down. She wowed to herself that very moment to throw away any money she would receive from Kanako in the future. "So, till my monthly report then?"

"No," Kanako said evenly. "From this day onward, you are to report me every day. Your orders are to follow Marisa Kirisame, without her noticing you of course, and document any suspicious activity she may be partaking in."

Aya's throat went dry. Kanako's aura spread again, and became nearly unbearable.

"Understood," Aya said way too fast and backed away a few more steps. It didn't help, as Kanako leveled her gaze with her. Aya felt like she was being crushed under a heel.

"I am not finished yet. In addition, you will have to daily check on Reimu's condition and report any other important events. Use your subordinates for that."

"Understood," Aya said again. There was a pause, and Aya felt like her eyes were being slowly gouged out, such was the intensity of Kanako's gaze. She wanted to scream, and couldn't.

"Good," Kanako finally said, releasing her mental grip. "See you tomorrow."

Without thinking of an appropriate response, without even bowing formally Aya ran, taking off in the air and flying forward without picking direction, anywhere just to get away from the goddess of wind. She dared to look back as she flew down the mountain, past the meadow where Suwako was still playing around.

Suwako waved her goodbye, and with her keen eyesight Aya saw to the meticulous detail two colorful butterfly wings sticking out of Suwako's mouth.

Somehow, Aya felt she was exactly in the same situation that unfortunate butterfly was.

In the maw of a god, ready to be swallowed.

[… … … … … … … … … … …]

Reimu coughed. It was yet another coughing fit, dry, exhausting and painful. The pain appeared last week, first nearly insensible, but grew in intensity every day. It was bearable and disappeared shortly after the coughing stopped, but still Reimu awaited each new episode with a growing feeling of dread.

And became harder and harder to hide her condition from the visitors and Marisa.

She stopped coughing and rolled on her side. Lately she spent most of the time in her room, slipping into her futon at first opportunity, and it was not because of laziness. Mundane tasks like sweeping the shrine courtyard and doing laundry became harder and harder to perform with each passing day, like her strength was actively being sucked out by some unseen leech.

"Stupid spring cold," she muttered, turning to the other side. She never heard of a cold that caused the afflicted to cough up blood, but she blamed it on all chest injuries she received in the last couple of years. Yes, that had to be that.

Time ticked slowly and the sun was setting in front of the shrine, painting the room first in gold, then crimson hues. Reimu felt relieved. At least there won't be any more visitors today and she would be able to cough at her leisure, not fearing that someone would go spreading the false rumors that the one and only defender of Gensokyo has gone ill and weak.

She wouldn't have such luck that day, as a high-pitched sound of an airborne projectile announced the arrival of Marisa Kirisame long before the broom-mounted witch became visible from behind the bamboo forest surrounding the shrine. It gave Reimu an opportunity to crawl out of the futon and straighten her clothes a little. She made her way out to the courtyard and leaned on the donation box, looking busy.

Marisa appeared in view and veered for the shrine. She made a circle in the air, leaving a fading trail of stars behind her before dropping altitude and landing at the center of the courtyard.

"Oi!" she called out, waving to Reimu. "How is our favorite ten thousand yen miko doing today?"

"I told you not to call me that!" Reimu protested but Marisa didn't care, coming closer and smiling, her free hand behind her back. Reimu nervously smiled back. She felt a desire to cough, and suppressed it. Marisa must not know.

"Marisa, that better be a ten thousand yen bill you are about to surprise me with," she said evenly.

"It's better, ze~!" Marisa exclaimed and nearly shoved a dirty, burnt and limp tulip into Reimu's face. "It's the first flower of spring, which I personally wrestled away from Lily White in a heated danmaku battle!"

"Ugh…" Reimu uttered, a bit at loss for words. "Thanks, I guess."

She took the flower from Marisa's outstretched hand and started walking towards the kitchen side entrance, waving for the witch to follow. Marisa happily tagged along.

"So, did you fight Lily just for the flower or did she cause some trouble?"

Marisa didn't answer, and Reimu turned to her, a bit puzzled at her silence. Marisa was looking down, and the shade from her hat covered her face. "Yeah, you can definitely say that was trouble," she muttered, then snapped back and smiled. "But I sorted it all out, and it's all fine again, ehehe…"

"Kirisame Marisa, are you hiding something?" Reimu asked with mock harshness.

"Maybe, maybe not, ze~. And as for you, Hakurei Reimu, do you have something to hide as well? A new diet, perhaps?" Marisa said back with a smile, playing along.

Reimu stopped. There was a feeling in her chest, a dry and raspy desire to cough. She suppressed it again.

"Uh, Reimu, you look a bit pale. I everything—"

Reimu suddenly doubled over, coughing and wheezing, her breath raspy and choking. Marisa was momentarily taken aback in surprise, then rushed forward, supporting Reimu's weight.

"Hey, what's wrong? Reimu? Reimu, talk to me!"

"I'm fine… it's just common cold," Reimu choked out between coughs. She wiped her mouth with a back of her hand and straightened up. She felt dizzy, and the world around seemed to have lost its color.

Marisa's eyes went wide. "Reimu? Th-there is b-blood on you hand…"

Reimu looked down, and suddenly the world spun around. Her legs buckled and she fell down, spinning into a downward spiral of darkness, vain cries for her name fading behind.

And in that last moments she thought that maybe it was not just a common cold after all.

[… … … … … … … … … …]