Dance with the Devil

A Kuroshitsuji Fanfic

"I have completed my revenge. My life is in your hands."

I closed my eyes, waiting for the inevitable darkness I knew was about to take over. I had been through this scene many times in my mind, yet I still wondered how it would feel to have my soul slowly ripped away from me. I couldn't help myself as the words slipped out of my mouth.

"Make it as painful as you can."

I could almost feel his red eyes glowing as they focused intensely on me; I could imagine his lips curl into a knowing smile, but I didn't dare open my eyes; I didn't want to see more of the world I was leaving behind. Not that I had any regrets, not that I was afraid of dying. I had lived long enough to complete my revenge. It had been the sole purpose of my existence since that fateful day. For such purpose I had sold my soul to the devil that was now standing in front of me and now that it was over, I had nothing to live for. I felt complete and strangely peaceful.

I knew the day would come when I would be standing and waiting like I was now for my own death and I knew that there would be nothing beyond it.

Only darkness.

That was exactly what I wanted. I knew there would be no heaven or hell for me but I also knew I didn't want to see my family. I didn't want to see the people I had ruefully abandoned in my search for revenge. Darkness would be great; darkness would be the best. Just complete emptiness.

Forever and ever.

To be finally released from my storming, suffering mind. That was the best I could hope for. I knew I would never be forgiven for my sins, for having wasted away my soul for the purpose of revenge and sacrificing the lives of many people. I was able to bear that. I had always been.

And the pain? The pain would be a reminder of how I had lived: never forsaking the anger and the suffering I had felt. I wanted to feel the pain up until the last instant.

As I awaited the final blow, I felt a cold hand on mine. Inevitably, I opened my eyes to see that sly smile I had somehow grown to cherish. A most mischievous expression was placed on his eyes as he slowly put his other hand on my waist and guided me around the stone floor. I recognized the dance from the many lessons Sebastian had given me before.

Silently, gracefully, the demon waltzed while carrying me as well. I played along. I had nothing to lose. I saw his cunning smile give way to a seducing grin and his eyes glow dangerously as he now roamed his hands over my body, his face coming closer as if he wanted to whisper something in my ear. Instead, I felt his harsh tongue slide over my cheek. Suddenly I was steered into a spin and then I was pushed closer to his body. I shuddered as his hands were now slithering lusciously along my thighs. I could imagine the music change to a more spicy rhythm as he picked his pace.

Then he reached up to tug gently at my hair as he again leaned closer to my face. I tried not to look at him in the eye as I didn't want to be confronted with the predatory gaze I knew he now held. I could feel his warm breath mingling with mine as he brought his lips close to mine. Then he backed away again and continued to lead me in the dance.

Sebastian. Stop playing. As if he could read my thoughts, his smile grew even wider and he conducted the waltz to a brisker pace. My thoughts swirled in a mixture of feelings as I wondered what my life would have been like if I didn't have to die now. I knew I shouldn't but I couldn't stop questioning myself whether one day I would have been able to dance with someone this close, a dance of heat and passion and not one of death. I wondered if I would have ever been loved and treasured as I had once been; if it was possible that life didn't have to be the pit of darkness and despair I had always judged it to be. Then maybe I would have had friends and lovers, not servants and demons willing to put up a worthless façade.

But these thoughts were meaningless and I cursed Sebastian for giving me the time to have them, for I knew I would not be given that chance. I would not take it even if I could. I wasn't worth it. I had chosen to live my life in darkness and there was no way to go back now. I didn't even wish to. I kept my face stern and disapproving, I could never let him know what I was thinking. It was a game. Ever a game of pretense.

I wanted to tell Sebastian I had always seen through his empty lies. I wanted to tell him that I knew he was a demon and that he had never cared for me even for a moment. But he knew that. He knew I had never believed him when he was concerned about my safety. I knew there was just one thing he was after – my soul. Everything had been perfectly deliberated in order to get what he wanted. I just liked to pretend he had cared. I just liked to pretend someone had.

I knew the dance had come to an end when Sebastian gently lowered his head to mine one last time. The moment lingered for a long time like dewdrops suspended on leaves, anticipating their fall. I could feel his lustful gaze fixed on mine and I felt transfixed and strangely captivated as if I were not ominously waiting for my own end. Sebastian pressed his lips to mine in a searing kiss. His tongue demanded entrance and, as it struggled against mine, I could feel him slowly stealing my life away. My body felt light and insubstantial as if it were turning to dust, my vision blacking out. I felt a sharp pain deep inside me and then there was darkness.

A/N: A big thanks to xXxBloodDeathLovexXx for betaing this fic.

Inspired by a Breaking Benjamin song with the same title.

Please Review! I'd really like to hear your oppinion!