Note: All disclaimers will be posted at the end of the story.

The Most Perilous Game

Chapter One: Are you Game?

"Man, I'm bored," Remy sighed as he lay sprawled out on the couch in the recreation room while idly toying with a lock pick.

"I must admit so am I," Piotr said sitting in a lounge chair and absently doodling on a sketchpad.

"Me too," Pyro whined slumped over the far end of the couch. "I'm so bored I don't even wanna burn anything."

"Wow, you are bored," Piotr blinked. "Not that I am complaining..."

"Shut up you nitwits," Sabertooth growled as he crankily flipped through channels on the TV. "I'm bored too, but you don't hear me griping about it."

"Actually, you just did," Remy pointed out.

"Shut up Cajun," Sabertooth snapped.

"I'm soooooo boooooorrrred," Pyro let out a loud sigh. "Bored, bored, bored, bored, bor...wait a second!" He shot up and quickly ran out of the room. "I know what we can do! Be back in a minnie!"

"Uh oh," Piotr turned towards his teammates. "Do we even want to know what he is planning?"

"No, but we're probably going to be dragged into it anyway," Remy put away his lock pick. "Heck, I'm so bored I'd actually welcome a little chaos around here."

"Famous last words," Sabertooth snorted.

"I'm back!" Pyro reappeared with a long, compact wooden box tucked under his arm. He held it up for everyone to see. "Ta da!"

"A board game?" Remy gave him a skeptical look. "You want us to play a board game?"

"Why not? That's what you're supposed to do when you're bored," Pyro said and set the box down on the table.

"Yeah, but we've played 'em all already," Remy pointed out. "Multiple times."

"The ones that have survived anyway," Piotr noted.

"Come on mates," Pyro coaxed. "At least give it a try. Besides, this is a new game."

"It is? Well okay," Piotr set aside his sketchpad.

"I'm in. Anything to beat this boredom," Remy sighed getting up. "You game, Sabes?"

"Why not? Nothing worth watching anyway," Sabertooth grunted and turned off the TV.

"This is it?" Remy frowned as Pyro unfolded the top of the hinged wooden game box. The main playing board was relatively sparse with four blank paths winding about it. "I'm not impressed."

"It does look pretty basic," Piotr tapped on a dark round flat crystal set in the center of the board. All of the blank paths led to it. "I wonder what this does?"

"Where did you get this?" Remy felt along the sides of the ornately carved game box which was decorated with a jungle-like motif. "It looks pretty old."

"I swiped it from some sealed-up old basement while we were at the high school," Pyro explained. "You know, the time we pranked the whole place after infiltrating Xavier's?"

"Yeah, I remember," Remy nodded glancing at the central crystal. "So, what are the rules?"

"Oh, not much," Pyro read the instructions painted on the inside of the game box. "Roll dice to move tokens along the path, first player to reach the center wins, yada, yada, yada."

"Huh, like this is really going to be exciting," Sabertooth scoffed.

"Maybe it is better than it looks," Piotr said somewhat unconvincingly.

"Well, let's set things up," Pyro opened a small side compartment and held out four hand-carved stone animal tokens. "Who wants to be the elephant?"

Suddenly, the tokens flew out from Pyro's hand and placed themselves upright on the playing board. The whole game emitted a strange, mysterious drumming sound for a moment and then stopped.

The Acolytes stood frozen for a minute. "O-kay," Remy broke the silence. "That was unexpected."

"Wow, I didn't know it could do that," Pyro blinked in shock. "Maybe the board game is a mutant."

"Oh geeze, don't even start with us about that," Remy groaned.

"Maybe we should not play this game," Piotr ventured cautiously. "At least not without knowing more about it."

"Oh for crying out loud. Move over you sissies," Sabertooth grabbed the dice and rolled them. "There. Let's get on with it."

"Okay, you rolled a..." Pyro trailed off as Sabertooth's animal token moved the designated number of spaces by itself. "How does it do that?"

"Look," Piotr pointed as words began to appear in the center crystal. The Acolytes bent over the game to read them.

"A graceful neck above your head, can quickly turn violent instead." Sabertooth frowned at the words. "What the heck does that mean?"

"Uh, Sabes?" Remy pointed toward the ceiling, his eyes wide in shock.

"What?" Sabertooth looked up only to see a full grown bull giraffe looming over him. "Yahhhhhhhhh!"

"What the?" Piotr scrambled back from the table and gazed upward. "Where did that come from?"

"Cool! A giraffe!" Pyro chirped as the large animal ducked its head slightly to avoid scraping it against the ceiling. "Think Mags will let us keep it?"

"No way! This thing reeks like crazy!" Sabertooth held his nose and swiped at one of the giraffe's legs. "Go on! Get out of here you stink farm!"

"Uh, Sabes. I don't think you should have done that," Remy called out.

"Why not?" Sabertooth turned around only to see the large horned giraffe head swinging straight for him. "Oh boy..."

WHAM!

"Wow," Piotr blinked as Sabertooth was thrown across the room. "I did not know giraffes could do that."

"Oh yeah. Their necks are really flexible," Pyro said. "You'd be amazed at what they can do."

"Uh oh," Remy gulped as the giraffe began to snort and swing its neck around again. "I think Sabes made it angry!"

"AAANNNAAANNNAAANNNWWWWWW!"

"Look out!" Piotr shouted as the giraffe charged and made contact with the couch.

CRASH!

"Yikes!" Remy rolled to the side as the giraffe ran around and began to destroy everything in sight.

SMASH!

"Somebody stop that thing!" Remy yelled as the giraffe lashed out and drop kicked the TV.

CRASH!

"Don't hurt it!" Pyro shouted ducking out of the way. "He's just scared and confused!"

"He's scared?" Remy yelped while trying to avoid being hit. "What about us?"

"Ohhh, that stinking, spotted menace," Sabertooth growled as he picked himself up from the floor. "I'm gonna gut that thing and spill out its...huh?" Sabertooth blinked as a large, dark tongue wrapped around his outstretched arm. "What the...?"

WHOOOOOOSH!

WHAM!

"Ouch, that's gotta hurt," Pyro winced as the giraffe whipped its neck around and threw Sabertooth hard against a wall, leaving a large indentation.

"Get out of the way!" Piotr grabbed Pyro and pulled him aside as the giraffe charged past them kicking everything in its path.

CRUNCH!

"Well that's one way to make an exit," Remy stared at the ruined doorway, now significantly enlarged from the giraffe having ducked and muscled its way through.

"Where did that come from?" Piotr wondered as he helped Pyro up.

"Maybe it came from the game?" Pyro suggested. "The words did say something about a graceful neck."

"Ohhh," Sabertooth groaned and fell from his imprinted position on the wall.

"As Sabes painfully found out," Pyro added.

"The game," Remy made his way over to the table which had miraculously remained untouched. "I don't remember anything mentioning animals appearing out of nowhere. Hey, the crystal thing is dark now."

"Uh oh. Look at this," Piotr pointed to a large block of text labeled in dark red. "Warning. Do not begin a game unless you intend to finish. The exciting consequences will vanish only when an entire game has been concluded."

"See! I told you! The giraffe did come from the game!" Pyro squealed.

"But how is that possible?" Piotr frowned in concentration.

"I don't know, but I'm not taking any chances. This thing is gonna be mothballed and never played again," Remy picked up the dice and threw them in the side compartment. "Now let's go get that walking wrecking ball outta the base before it makes a mess."

"I suppose you are..." Piotr trailed off as he watched Remy's animal token move across the board. "Oh no. I think you just accidentally made a roll."

"What?" Remy looked at the board and saw more words appearing in the crystal. "To clear them you can slash and hack. Beware, for these green things fight back."

CRAAAAAACCCK!

SHUMP! SHUMP! SHUMP!

"What the...aaahhhhhh!" Sabertooth yelled as the floor developed several large cracks. Thick, green vine-like tendrils began to shoot up from them.

"Oh my," Piotr gasped as other vines broke through the walls, spread and rapidly grew out.

"Yikes!" Pyro jumped aside as a huge pitcher plant rose up and unfolded exactly where he had been standing.

"Oh no," Remy looked around at the newly developed vegetation. The large, intimidating plants had completely overgrown the recreation room. "Mags is gonna have a fit when he sees this!"

"I dunno, I think they add a little color around here...yahhhhhh!" Pyro screamed as a tendril from the pitcher plant grabbed him and pulled him towards its digestive cavity. "AAAHHHHHH! SOMEBODY HELP ME!"

"Hold on. I will...uggghhh!" Piotr shouted as he was set upon by several dozen vines. "Hey, get off!"

"ROOOAAARRR!" Sabertooth dove into a swath of razor sharp long grass and proceeded to tear it apart. "TAKE THIS YOU OVERGROWN ASTROTURF! YEEEOOOWWW! THOSE BLADE EDGES HURT!"

"Let's get outta here!" Remy grabbed the game box and ran for the exit while using several charged cards to clear a path.

"Right behind you!" Piotr armored up and tore free from the vines. He rushed over and freed Pyro right as he was about to be digested.

"THEY'RE COMING AFTER US! RUN AWAY! RUN AWAY!" Pyro yelled breaking out his lighter and helped Remy make a path. The Acolytes fiercely fought their way out of the room and regrouped down the hallway.

"Gahhhhhh," Sabertooth gasped as he recovered from his wounds. "Man, those things are tough!"

"Look, they are still coming out," Piotr pointed as the vines began to creep into the hallway.

"How are we gonna stop 'em?" Pyro asked. "For every one I burn down, three more grow up."

"I think we're going to have to play the game," Remy sighed. "If we finish it they'll all go away. At least I hope they will."

"Are you out of your mind?" Sabertooth snapped. "The game is the one who made all this stuff appear in the first place! I can't believe I just said that."

"Look, I know it's ridiculous but I don't think we have a choice," Remy shot back. "Unless you wanna go and shred weeds for the rest of your life."

"Fine," Sabertooth grunted.

"Great," Remy unfolded the game box and set it on the floor. "Who wants to go next?"

"I will," Pyro grabbed the dice and rolled them. More ominous drumming came from the game as new words appeared in the crystal. "Moving to a new location is the goal of each migration."

"HOOONNNNNNK!"

"Oh no," Piotr gulped as the air around them began to shift. "I do not like the sound of that."

"SQUAAAAAAKKKKKK!"

"AAARRRGGGHHH!" Sabertooth yelled as an enormous flock of birds flew around the corner and knocked him off his feet.

"Hit the deck!" Remy, Piotr and Pyro dove to the floor as a seemingly endless stream of herons, ibises, flamingos, spoonbills, pelicans, geese and cranes flew and rushed above their heads.

"Let's hope none of them decide to have target practice while we're down here!" Pyro yelled and threw his arms around his head.

"If they do I'm gonna have roast bird for dinner...yaaahhhhhh!" Sabertooth shouted as the birds moved on and a massive swarm of dragonflies, beetles, butterflies and other winged insects followed in their wake.

"YEEEOOOWWWWWW!" Pyro yelped as several beetles landed on him, some of them as big as dinner plates. "AAAHHHHHH! GET 'EM OFF ME! GET 'EM OFF ME!"

"GAAAGGGHHHHHH!" Remy spotted a dark column of very large army ants and quickly leapt to his feet. "RUN! RUN!"

"I'M RUNNING! I'M RUNNING!" Pyro screamed as the Acolytes tore like mad down the insect infested hallway.

"In here!" Piotr reached the entrance to the laundry room, his armored form keeping the mass of insects at bay.

"AAAHHHHHHHHH!" Remy, Pyro and Sabertooth frantically spirited and dove into the room.

Piotr quickly slammed the door shut and stuffed several thick towels underneath it. "There, that should keep everything out."

"Ohhh," Sabertooth groaned while covered in multiple red bite marks. "I really hate those things."

"At least we made it through without being bit," Pyro said to Remy.

"Lucky you," Sabertooth hissed.

"Let's hope we manage to live long enough to end this," Remy sighed. "Whose turn is it?"

"Mine," Piotr unfolded the game box, having picked it up in the hallway and dutifully rolled the dice. He carefully read the new message. "Earth and water, silt and sand. Mix to overrun the land."

RUMMMMMMBBBLEEE!

"Oh no," Remy moaned as the washing machine began to shake. "What now?"

UUURRRPPPPPPPPP!

"Huh?" Piotr blinked as the washer tipped over and a torrent of dark, viscous mud began to pour out. Several of the laundry room's pipes burst open and started to emit mud as well.

"Uh oh," Pyro gulped as the pool of mud rapidly filled the room. "We gotta get outta here!"

"Let's go!" Sabertooth headed for the door, but slipped and fell face first into the mud. "Gluuub!"

"Where's the game?" Remy shouted as the mud level reached his waist and threatened to overwhelm him. "We can't finish without it!"

"I have it!" Piotr held the folded game box above his head with one hand while holding Pyro above the mud with the other. "We need to go!"

"How? The mud's everywhere!" Pyro yelped as he tried to stand on Piotr's armored shoulders.

"Must...reach...it!" Remy paddled and stretched out his hand, managing to charge the door just as the mud level rose over his head.

BOOM!

GLUUUUUUOOOOOOPPP!

"AAAAAAHHHHHHHHH!" The Acolytes screamed as the torrent of mud poured out of the laundry room and swept them down the hallway.

"GAAARRRGGGGGGHHH!" Sabertooth gagged as he accidentally swallowed a large mouthful of mud.

"THIS IS NOT A FIRE FRIENDLY ENVIRONMENT!" Pyro shouted as he somehow managed to bodysurf on top of the mud wave. "BUT THIS IS SO COOL!"

"Blop! Blop!" Several large mud turtles popped up and floated alongside him.

OOOOOOSSSSSSHHHHHH!

The mudslide finally petered out and left the four mucky mutants washed up just outside the bathroom. "Well, that was invigorating," Remy coughed and wiped the mud from his eyes.

"That was fun!" Pyro smiled happily while covered head to toe in mud. "Can we do that again?"

"NO!" Everyone yelled at him.

"Awww," Pyro pouted.

"There you are," Piotr set the mud turtles down from where they had perched on his head and gave them a little push. "Off you go."

"Aaarrrggghhhhhh!" Sabertooth roared and spat out a mouthful of mud. "That's it! I've had it!" He grabbed the game box from Piotr's hand. "I'm putting an end to this nonsense right now!"

"Wait! What are you doing?" Pyro asked worriedly.

"This!" Sabertooth unfolded the game and ripped it to pieces. The central playing board hit the floor where Sabertooth smashed it with his boot, cracking the crystal. "There!" He threw the two broken folding wings on top of it and kicked the wrecked game into the bathroom in triumph. "That's the way to end it!"

"Oh boy. Do you think this will affect anything...?" Remy trailed off as the dismantled game shook and to his amazement began to repair itself. "Uh, Sabes?"

"What?" Sabertooth glanced down and saw the three separated game sections perfectly reattach themselves. "No way! You gotta be kidding me!"

"Nope," Pyro gulped as the fractured crystal healed and began to glow dangerously. "In fact I think you made it angry!"

"Oh dear," Piotr watched as a new message appeared in the now flawless crystal. "Inward you'll go, your nature turned. Until a lesson has been learned."

"Huh? What the heck is that supposed to mean...aaahhhhhh!" Sabertooth yelled as a strange cyclone emerged from the crystal and began to suck him up.

"Oh my gaaaaaahhhhhhhhh!" Remy screamed as his body twisted and seemingly turned to smoke. Piotr and Pyro yelped as the same thing happened to them. The cyclone reeled, whirling them round and round before sucking them all into the game, leaving nothing behind but a muddy bathroom and the steady sound of deep, ominous drumming.