Title: Wedded Bliss

Summary: Cid just wanted a nice wedding with his mousy bride and all of his friends to be there. When that does not work in his favor, the blonde is more than willing to end it, but...he was beaten to the punch.

Warnings: OOC-ness, swearing, smoking, drinking, groping, man-on-man rubbing... Heh, yeah, I went there...

Disclaimer: I own nothing! ...Well, I own mental problems; sue me and you are free to take them away!

Side Note: This is a birthday gift to the wonderful Aeriths-Rain (hope I spelled that right, Jennie), whose birthday is tomorrow; and the wonderful mizperceived (pretty sure I'm spelling that wrong, boss-lady), whose birthday was yesterday.

Peering out into the seated group of people, the blonde pilot sucked harder on the filter to his cigarette, hoping to calm his nerves. "He ain't fuckin' there," he hissed before turning to the wedding planner. "Some fat bitch is sittin' in his goddamn seat!" Nodding meekly, the woman flipped through the paperwork on her chart, before showing it to the irate pilot.

"That's Miss Shera's mother," she said nervously as the pilot's blue eyes roamed over the names that were strategically placed in the pews.

"...Why the fuck ain't his name there?" the blonde growled darkly as he turned bright blue eyes onto the woman. Honestly, she had seen many bitchy bridezillas in her day but she had never seen a groom that had such a temper over the seating arrangements. How the meek woman that was the bride was supposed to put up with this dragon of a man was beyond her.

"I-I'm sorry but Miss Shera never put his name on the list and she verified the seating charts." The woman jumped as the stream of expletives that came from the short blonde as he stormed out of the room, leaving the woman trembling there before she moved to sit in a nearby chair. God, he truly was a scary man!

Snarling, the blonde tore off his tie as he stormed over to the reception, stubbing out his cigarette on the white linen that covered the table before having the bartender pour him a glass of whiskey. Downing the drink, the pilot tipped the bartender before heading past the members of Avalanche that were apparently invited to the wedding and making his way to the dressing room. He was about to knock on the door; or break it down, perhaps; when the priest came over and wrapped his arm around the blonde's arm before leading the man out to the altar, the music beginning to play as he smiled at Cid.

So, she was playing him for an idiot, huh? All of her fucking family was there, smiling sweetly like fucking mannequins that could not believe that their precious girl was getting married. The fucking cows. The blonde sneered as he looked at the faces that he did not know. Hell, he only wanted nine fuckers to come to his goddamn wedding: Vincent, Cloud, Tifa, Marlene, Denzel, Nanaki, Yuffie, Barret, and Reeve, who would, without a doubt, bring a gaggle of Cait Siths with him. But, it was Shera's goddamn day and he wanted to have the day be perfect for her. Now, he was truly regretting that fucked up decision. Only eight of his nine guests, excluding the grouping on robotic moogles that sat on Reeve's lap and chattered aimlessly, actually came. He was certain that Vincent would have popped up by now. But, Lady Luck was either menstrual or feeling very bitchy today. He really did not expect something so underhanded and sneaky of the mousy little bitch that he had proposed to. Granted, he was drunk off of his ass and he got the ring from a fucking gumball machine, but it was the principle, damn it!

She fucking did not invite his goddamn best friend!

The bitch invited all of her goddamn distance relatives, her bitch of a mother, and leering aunts, but not the one person he really wanted to come to his goddamn wedding! Hell, he managed to not only get the elusive fucker a phone, but also get him to answer the fucking thing when he called; by using a very devious ringtone, at that; and now she went and undid fucking years of work! Years so slowly prying open the brunette's shell just to catch a glimpse of the fucking pearl hidden underneath before the bastard could clam up on him. Now, now it was like the damn shell had snapped shut and nearly lopped of his goddamn fingers!

Oh, Shera would pay for that shit. There was no fucking way in hell she was going to fuck with Cid Highwind on his goddamn wedding day. He paid for all of that shit and he could tear the fucking carpet out from under her!

Cruel? Perhaps. Mean? Oh, definitely. Worth it? Of course!

He looked over as Shera and her father walked down the aisle, his wife-to-be flashing him a meek and happy smile. The nerve of that bitch. He was tempted to haul off and punch her in the goddamn mouth, break the pretty smile into a million pieces...

"Before we begin," the priest said as he smiled at the happy faces in the church. "Is there anyone here who has a lawful objection as to why these two should not be wedded under the Lord on this day? Let him speak now or forever hold his peace."

"Yeah," Cid said as a dark smirk unfurled across his face. "I got a fuckin' reason."

He rolled his eyes at the dramatic gasps that came from her entire family, and a good portion of Avalanche, even though Yuffie shouted "I knew it! You owe me fifty gil, Reeve!" over them all.

"Shera, yer a beautiful woman, don't get me wrong," he said as he took her hand. "But yer a shifty little bitch an' I ain't marryin' ya. Would rather spoon with Reno of the fuckin' Turks every night of my goddamn life then spend the rest of my days with ya."

"...That is cruel," a voice commented from the left of the pilot.

"Ain't fuckin' talkin' to ya, pal," Cid snapped as he waved his hand in dismissal at the voice.

"Matters not, Chief," the voice replied smugly. "Besides, I do not believe that the groom can object to the wedding. An outsider, however..." as the voice trailed off, the blonde spun around to grin at the sight of the leather-clad and cloaked gunner that painfully stood out amongst the rows of people dressed formally.

"Speak of the devil," the blonde said before quickly making his way to the brunette and clapping him on the back. "How ya been?"

"...Apparently, a lot better than you," the ex-Turk teased before he was pulled into a tight hug, breathing deeply as he took in the scent of the pilot's cologne and the feel of his warm muscles flush against his own. Looking to the priest that stared at them in bewilderment, the brunette pierced him with his dark red eyes, "...Needless to say, I firmly object to this wedding, father." He smirked at how the priest nodded before scrambling away from the altar. "...You did not invite me, Chief."

"Thought ya were already fuckin' invited," the blonde countered, grunting when his crotch was firmly grabbed.

"...Mm, I do believe you owe me one..."

"Heh, fer gettin' ya to save me from a drunken mistake of a weddin' or fer not savin' ya a front row seat at it?" the blonde teased.

Leaning down, the brunette murmured darkly in his ear as his gloved fingers massaged the blonde's cock through the fabric of his tuxedo, "Come Hell or high water, Chief, I will always be ready to help you out."

Cid moaned softly as he wrapped his arm around the brunette's waist, making the ex-Turk chuckled darkly in amusement and lust at his next words, "I fuckin' choose cum over Hell an' high water, Val."

Review to let me know what you thought. Also, should I add a smut-filled second chapter or leave it as a short one-shot?