Disclaimer: I don't own South Park. If I did, there'd be waaaay more... uh, never mind that.

(*~*~*Kenny's POV*~*~*)

"Ken... Kenny, get up." A soft voice comes from my left.

The SUV lurches to a stop and Stan gently rocks me awake. In the front passenger seat, I yawn, open my eyes, and stretch my arms wide. "A-a-are we here?"

"Yeah, c'mon babe." He gets out of the driver's seat and opens my door for me. I've only been asleep for fifteen minutes, and I still need Stan's help to steady myself. See, kiddies, this is why you shouldn't be an alcoholic at age 16.

A moment of leaning against him stops the spinning in my head. I open my eyes and grab his hand. "I'm ready."

(*~x*~x*x~*x~*)

When I'm finally settled in my special dentist chair, I can't stop squirming.

You see, I've only been to the dentist once before.

My family could never afford medical insurance and all that jazz. When I started dating Stan earlier this year, I was reluctant to let him in on my helpless poor-boy situation.

But last month he made me go, and that Goddamned dentist found a ton of stuff that went wrong in my mouth. Now I've got to get it fixed. I. Fucking. Hate. This.

"Stan? It... it's not gonna hurt, is it?" I ask, eyes wide. My grip on his hand tightens.

"Nah, it's gonna be fine. I promise," Stan soothes me calmly.

"Right you are, Mr. Marsh," the dentist says as he walks into the room. "Now, Mr. McCormick, I'm going to give you some nitric oxide. That's gonna make you go to sleep, real nice. When you're asleep, I'm gonna fix your teeth. You've got a lot of nasty stuff up in that mouth of yours, so it's gonna take maybe an hour or two. Okay?"

"Uh... sure," I nod slowly, looking at Stan to my right, "Stan, will you stay with me?"

"The whole time, man," he grins encouragingly.

"Oh, and when you wake up, you may feel a little goofy. It'll go away quickly, but you might not remember some of it," the dentist smiles. "So are you ready now?"

With one quick glance at Stan, I nod. The dentist puts the mask over my face, and within seconds, I'm out cold.

(*~*~*Stan's POV*~*~*)

I have to tell you, it was nasty. His whole mouth was covered with blood and who knows what else. I've seen him die plenty of times, so I'm used to blood guts and gore, but it was still pretty gross.

"Okie dokie," the dentist says as he finishes cleaning up Kenny's mouth. "I'm all done. He's gonna be acting real weird, so don't let him drive or operate heavy machinery."

Giving him a strange look, I say, "Uh huh. Well, I'm driving him home, and I guess then I'll take care of him until it wears off."

"Good, good. I'll leave you to him then." He leaves the room, and Kenny starts to wake up.

I notice this and smile at him. "Hey beautiful. How was it?"

Immediately, he gets this serious expression. "I... I need to tell you something. It's realllllly imporrrrrrtant."

"Sure, okay. Shoot."

"Commmmme... closerrrrrrr..."

Obliging, I scoot up to his face. Up close, he looks just like he does when he's high. "Damn, dude. You're really high."

"Yeeeeaaah," Kenny starts giggling. "But I need to do something." Uncoordinatedly, he pulls me toward him and our lips meet in a slightly chaotic kiss.

"Mmmmhhhmmm... That's better..." he sighs and leans back. "So, can I have a purple chalupa?"

Grinning, I laugh, "Sure. Whatever the hell that is."

(*~x*~x*x~*x~*)

When we get to my house, I help Kenny in the house and onto the couch. I lay him down and sit next to him.

"Owwww... it hurts..." Kenny whines, still half asleep. I think the anesthetic is starting to wear off.

Sighing, I reply, "I know, babe, just... try not to concentrate on it." I begin to stroke his shiny blonde hair as he relaxes against my side.

"Ohhhkaaay... Love ya, Eric..." he murmurs into my shoulder.

"Love y-" Wait, what? Eric? As in Cartman?

AN: So, should I leave it like this? Or make another chapter and whatnot? Please please please review!