Berrynose felt the rise and fall of Mousewhisker's chest as he slept next to him. Mousewhisker's breathing was soft and slow, almost soothing to listen to. The familiarity of it made Berrynose want to sigh with relief.

No, he hadn't felt right since Honeyfern's death. But surely it wasn't taking away from his warrior skills, like Hazeltail suggested. He would be fine. He just needed time, which no one seemed to want to give him.

It was nighttime again. Lately Berrynose had been sleeping during the day and staying awake all night. He couldn't pinpoint exactly why; perhaps he felt closer to Honeyfern when he could see the stars, where she was supposed to be.

He'd been having dreams. They were muddled, foggy dreams, but they were still pretty bad nonetheless. They happened every time he went to sleep, day or night: just yowls, and shouts of terror, and agonizing shrieks of pain. He supposed that it was probably a cloudy portrayal of when Honeyfern was bitten by the snake, but it seemed different somehow.

Just another thing to dwell on.

Berrynose laid his head on Mousewhisker's shoulder and drifted off into an uneasy sleep.

Again, he had the dream. But this time, there was something else. He could hear Honeyfern's voice in it, beckoning him. Calling him. He knew he was probably being delusional, but yet he wanted to hear what her voice said.

Berrynose felt a sharp jab in his ribs, and he jolted awake, sputtering a few weak coughs.

Mousewhisker was standing over him, his fur sticking up in different directions and looking generally ruffled. "You were all over the place," he meowed, flicking his ears in annoyance. "You kept flailing your limbs and muttering in your sleep. I had to do something, or else I wouldn't get any sleep."

"Sorry," Berrynose mewed, feeling his pelt grow hot.

Mousewhisker huffed and settled back down in his nest. "Yeah, well, not all of us can sleep during the day like you can. Some of us have to go on patrols and catch food for the Clan, instead of pretending to do that and instead moping the whole way."

"I'm not so sorry anymore," Berrynose meowed, standing up briskly. "I'm taking a walk."

"Why don't you check the borders while you're at it?" Mousewhisker mumbled, his voice muffled by the moss in his nest.

"No," Berrynose meowed simply, and left. He padded quickly out of camp and down toward the lake. He needed to go somewhere that no cat would look for him, and since everyone knew he wasn't that into water, he supposed no one would look for him at the lake, at least for a little while.

The sky was perfectly reflected on the lake, and it appeared as though the sky simply extended across the ground to reach out and touch Berrynose's paws. He put his front paws into the lake, dipping them into the cool water and sighing.

No one would ever believe he was feeling like this. For most cats, he did play off pretty well, just keeping emotionless. Only Daisy, Hazeltail, Mousewhisker, and Honeyfern's parents and sisters really knew how he was feeling, and maybe some of them didn't. Who really knew?

Suddenly, he couldn't hold it in any longer. He yowled up to the sky, "Why, StarClan? Why did you do this to me? You took away the only cat I ever really cared about. What more do you want to take from me?"

Defeated, Berrynose turned his head back to the cold water lapping at his paws.

Then the unimaginable happened.

Berrynose saw a faint glow. Bemused, he looked up to the sky. One of the stars was noticeably brighter than the others.

He shrugged it off. Weird things always happened with the sky. He didn't really pay much attention anymore, especially after the sun disappeared that one time.

"Berrynose."

Berrynose sighed. "Shut up, Hazeltail. I'm coming back. I'm not a kit."

"Berrynose."

Berrynose flicked his tail. That wasn't Hazeltail's voice. "Poppyfrost. Cinderheart, maybe?"

"Berrynose, please."

Berrynose froze. He had heard that, so many times before. The sarcasm, in a melodious voice, with the hint of a laugh behind it.

Berrynose didn't want to believe it. So he gulped the big lump in his throat and meowed, "Okay, then Icepaw. That's my final answer."

"I don't have much time. Turn around. Please."

Berrynose couldn't make his limbs work. He stayed rooted to the spot.

"It's me! I need to see you. Turn around!"

Berrynose forced his limbs into turning him slowly around. He kept his eyes clamped shut firmly until he was facing the opposite direction. Then he squinted, holding his breath.

Tiny beads of light were floating in the air.

"This isn't happening," he murmured. "I'm still dreaming. Mousewhisker's going to claw my ears off in a moment to wake me up."

"I've missed you."

The beads of light flickered and fluttered around a faint outline. Glittering pawsteps appeared every time the figure moved forward.

Berrynose exhaled. "Honeyfern."

Honeyfern was right in front of him now. Her eyes stared up at him, and he looked down at her. It was strange, seeing her, but also being able to see the ground beneath her.

Honeyfern moved quickly, and suddenly she was pressed up against him. Berrynose shivered and gasped in shock. Her pelt was as cold as ice, and the little stars on her pelt were like sparks on his skin.

"Don't grieve for me," Honeyfern murmured. "I'm not worth it. You've got your whole life ahead of you. Your dreams of being leader. Your dreams of a family. I can't do anything for you now. You have to move on."

"No," Berrynose mewed quickly. "No. I can't do anything without you."

Honeyfern laughed. "How much you've changed. I wonder if you would have said that if I was still alive."

Berrynose didn't know how to respond.

Honeyfern sighed and tilted her head. "Sure, you loved me. But I guess you don't ever know what you have until it's gone."