That's what I'm Counting On - Chapter 1

I am well aware that there are other stories to finish. Hush. I don't care about them right now.

This is a Portal story (dur) but after playing Portal 2 for the first time, I was inspired to narrate my thoughts and responses to the events in the game into a story. Give it a bit more emotional depth.

I will only say this once, if you haven't played Portal and/or Portal 2, I highly recommend you not read this until after playing. Also, none of the characters are mine. Chell only seems OOC because I apply my own thoughts and responses and kinda twist the story with some tiny changes that shouldn't affect the Portal 2 plotline too much.

Alright, got it? Good, on with the show.

"Good morning. You have been in suspension for –fifty- days. In compliance with state and federal regulations…" It was then that I chose to start ignoring the robotic alarm system. This was the third time it woke me up from…I guess you could call it stasis. I have no other term for it. The first time I woke up to this voice was startling to say the least. The last thing I remember before this "stasis" was looking at the trees beyond the Aperture Science drive-in entry. I was free, free of turrets pointing their hair-thin lasers at me before greeting me in that creepy, childish robotic voice and riddling my body with suspiciously high caliber bullets. Free from these crazy "puzzles" that had pools of deadly…waste, I will assume, and puzzles ending in a pit of fire. Free from that maniacal GLaDOS and her sadistic tests. Free from all that…for all of 20 seconds. The last thing I saw…well, heard was a robotic voice thanking me for taking the "party escort submission position". If only I had the strength to at least hobble away.

BEEP

Oh right. The wellness exercises. I looked up at the ceiling and stretched, causing my back to pop and let some stiff muscles stretch and actually move for once. You know, I never did remember volunteering for anything Aperture.

BEEP

I looked down and reached to touch my booted toes. Booted? Oh, right. I remember. These boots were in my room the second time I woke up. The robotic voice explained that the boots would keep me from landing on my head and suffering serious, serious being the operative word, injuring in a fall exceeding 500 meters. What the limits were on these boots I almost didn't want to know. What poor schmuck would have to test that?

"-Please stand in front of it." The voice said. What was I supposed to do again? Ah yes, the art. I did look at it before and it vaguely reminded me of a well-known painter. Robert? No…Bobby…Bob! Bob Ross! I remember him now. It's too bad that most people only associate him with his "happy little trees". Well his "happy little trees" could probably kick all their trees to kingdom come. Who knows, maybe this was one of his or someone else's; in any case, it was nice to look at.

BEEP

I was staring at the art, wasn't I? Then they played a tiny snippet of classical music. I always liked the sound of a harpsichord; a tiny version of a piano with a big sound, very similar but with a tinny sound rather than the delicate pings of a baby grand.

BEEP

"Good. Now please return to your bed."

I sourly obeyed the voice: laid down in bed and pulled the sheets up to rest on my chest, but I wasn't going to fall asleep just yet. There wasn't much I could do in here…or out of here for that matter, and it bothered me so much. The first time I woke up, I panicked and tried to escape: one door led to a nice little bathroom and the other led to a railing. I was still terribly rebellious and took the chance to run along the railing, until I found out the only way down was to get past a hallway of turrets. Without the Portal Gun to shoot a way past and/or make the turrets go away, I was stuck. On my way back to my room, I noticed a huge multitude of rooms and despite the appearance of light outside the walls of my own room, the entire facility seemed dark. The glow of the turrets' sights and a few very scattered lamps seemed to be the only light, probably to save energy. It was a hard thing to accept, but I couldn't go anywhere or do anything about my predicament.

I was tempted to try out the long fall boots when I'd first gotten them, but thought twice when I noticed how high up I was. Was that a small bush down there or a massive tree? I couldn't tell I was so high up. That was my first episode of vertigo in this facility and I had no inclination of intentionally doing something like that unless my life depended on it. At this moment, there was no GLaDOS, no lasers or guns, no danger whatsoever. Before drifting off to another stasis sleep, I had an inkling in the back of my mind that something was off.

That's what had me on edge when I woke up the fourth time…

The tinny and garbled wake-up music eased me out of stasis.

"Good moorning. You have beeninsuspension foor nine nine nine nine nine ni-"

My eyes snapped open and darted around the uncharacteristically dark room and the voice that was, up until this point, composed and smooth was garbled and jammed with sped up and slowed down sounds and computer errors. This was not good. Not good at-

Knock knock knock knock

"Hello? Anyone in there?" An accented voice sounded from the door. I was cautious about other people. I hadn't seen one in…quite some time. Judging from the amount of times the computer said "nine", I haven't had any contact with anything in a very long time. A couple more knocks. "Helloooo?"

'Only way I'll get answers.' I surmised, heading towards the doorway. Before opening, I pressed my ear to the door to hear this person better.

"Are you going to open the door? At any time?" Figuring the kindly voice wasn't going to kill me the moment I opened the door, I stepped back and grabbed the handle, pulling it open with surprising ease. When the person on the other side shouted in surprise I stepped back and stared up at…a personality core? "Ha! I knew someone was alive in here." The robotic orb said. Wait, alive? "Oh. My. God. You look terri- ummm…good. Looking good, actually." I paused and stared as the orb slid along a rail in the ceiling…did it just almost say I looked terrible? Well, it has been some time since I looked in a mirror. "Are you okay? Are you – Don't answer that. I'm absolutely sure you're fine. There's plenty of time for you to recover. Just take it slow."

"Please prepare for emergency evacuation." Oh dear, something happened while I was out.

"Stay calm! St-stay calm!" The orb stuttered, "'Prepare' - that's all they're saying. 'Prepare.' It's all fine. Alright? Don't move. I'm gonna get us out of here." This guy…orb, seemed like he meant well. He sounded nice enough, but then again GLaDOS sounded nice enough the first time I tested. Until she started introducing deadly force to "test" my abilities. "Oh. You MIGHT want to hang on to something. Word of advice, up to you."

'I'd better be cautious,' I thought, 'this thing could be a minion of hers or something.' But then again, hanging on was always a decent idea, even when GLaDOS wasn't involved. So, bolstering myself in the corner of the closet, I shifted my gaze around the room. That was when I noticed the massive person-shaped dent I'd left in the mattress. 'How long was I out?' I started to seriously consider what was wrong. I'd never heard of this orb before the personality cores that GLaDOS had and not even she had the capability to speak smooth human speech; hers was always broken and stilted. Maybe technology had made huge advancements while I was out. I wouldn't be surprised. The room then started to rattle and rock, causing the fridge door to fly open and the chair at the desk to flip onto its side.

"You alright down there? Can you hear me? Hello?" The orb asked.

"Yes." I croaked. Dear God, my throat was dry. Swallowing some saliva, I tried again, a little smoother and louder. "Yes…I…good." Stilted child-like speaking? That was bad news. I was rubbing my arms worriedly when the orb reappeared.

"Most test subjects do experience some cognitive deterioration after a few months in suspension." It said awkwardly; emoting his discomfort, "Now you've been under for…quite a lot longer, and it's not out of the question that you might have a very minor case of serious brain damage." Uh-oh.

"Bad." I said looking troubled up at the sphere. It paused in the middle of its sentence, something about being worried about brain damage, and answered.

"Wha-? Um yes…it is a little bad, but! But, it can be fixed!" The robot nodded enthusiastically, wiggling its handles, opening and closing the panels that made its optic lids. It was very emotive for a robot. What had Aperture been up to while I was out? "Now then, why don't you try saying 'yes' for starters?"

"Y-yes." I stuttered. It was remarkably hard to speak. I knew I knew how to speak, it was just making my mouth, larynx and lungs cooperate that was the trouble.

"Very good, very good! Now, uh try…jumping a little bit." I furrowed my brows and glanced at the contraptions on my legs. I haven't tried jumping in these boots yet. I crouched down and pushed myself up, surprisingly so my fingertips could graze the ceiling. I couldn't jump that high before, even with the braces from the last round of testing, and I was proud of my success to not make a fool of myself in front of a giant, robotic eye. "Nice. Now then, say 'apple'. 'Aaaapple.'" I felt like a kindergartener in front of this guy…thing. I don't know what to call it yet.

"Aa…aap-pull." Close, but not quite. I cleared my throat and prepared to try again when an alarm went off and the orb began to glance around.

"Okay, you know what? That's close enough. Just hold on tight." It said and started retreating back into the ceiling. I took cover in my closet again and braced myself as another warning was issued.

"All reactor core safeguards are now non-functional. Please prepare for reactor core meltdown." This place was powered with a reactor core? And it's melting down? The automated system sure picked a fine time to wake me up. I heard the hiss and grind of an engine and we started moving, the room tilting and rattling as the clumsy robot crashed my crate-room into what I assumed were other crate-rooms.

"Alright, I wasn't going to mention this to you, but I am in PRETTY HOT WATER here." The robot shouted above the crashing. Dear God! The wall's broken in! "How you doing down there? You still holding on?"

'Yes, I am still holding on while my room falls to pieces in front of me. Thanks for asking.' I thought angrily. Was this robot trying to kill me in the most awkwardly helpful way possible? Well…it IS Aperture Science.

"The reserve power ran out, so of course the whole relaxation center stops waking up the bloody test subjects." The robot said in an angry tone. Well, that would explain why I was out for 'nine nine nine' amount of time. Goodness, that's a lot of crates out there. "Hold on! This is a bit tricky!" You don't need to tell me twice. Thank heavens the closet has so far been left untouched. "And of course," the robot continues, "nobody tells ME anything. Noooo. Why should they tell me anything? Why should I be kept informed about the life functions of the ten thousand bloody test subjects I'm supposed to be in charge of?" Ten thousand? That explains the sheer volume of the crate-rooms. As the room was jostled some more, I stared out and recalled how dark it had been when I last left the room and how bright it looked now. This place looked to be lit by natural light, not the synthetic fluorescent or false "day-time" lights, but actual sunlight. Goodness I missed the sun. "Oi, it's close…" the robot said apprehensively, "Can you see? Am I gonna make it through? Have I got enough space?" I looked out of both opened sides as best I could. Neither path looked promising.

"No!" I croaked, "No space! Stop!" Apparently I still knew the words, thank goodness, but the robot either couldn't hear what I said or chose to ignore it.

"Augh, just…I just gotta get it through here…" Oh if only I could wake up and find this whole Aperture thing was just a long, bad dream. That I'd be at home, suddenly jump out of bed and have my father reassure me that it was all a bad dream and then have mother's special rhubarb pancakes and pet my best companion, a dog named Cubie. Unfortunately, I don't think I had my own bed since I was a kid, besides the one with the human-sized dent in it, and GLaDOS said I was an orphan, not that I believe a word she tells me anymore, but it isn't out of the question that I could be an orphan. Especially now that I've been asleep for heaven knows how long. The room crashed and banged around again, knocking me to my side inside the closet and snapping me back to the events at hand.

'Right, my room is falling apart and a spherical robot who says he's trying to help me could actually be conspiring to shake me around the room like a four year old with a goldfish in a bag of water. Perfect.' I cringed at the possibility and braced myself as we crashed again and again.

"And whose fault do you think it's going to be when the management comes down here and finds ten thousand flipping vegetables?" The robot shouted, frustrated and understandably angry at the turn of events. I do wish he'd take it easy though, if I'm guessing right, I'm one of the very few who survived being asleep for as long as I had and retaining most of my brain functions. You'd think he'd be a little gentler with a one in ten thousand chance survivor. We again crashed into another crate and this time I could see almost everything outside my room as the aesthetics crumbled away. "Aggh, see, now I hit that one, I hit that one…" He almost sounded like he was scolding himself, "Okay, listen, we should get our stories straight, alright? If anyone asks - and no one's gonna ask, don't worry - but if anyone asks, tell them as far as you know, the last time you checked, everyone looked pretty much alive. Alright? Not dead."

'Sure, you crazy bot. Who's going to ask me anyway?' I thought as we swung around and banged into a few more crates. Oh my God! That one's falling into the bottomless abyss! When am I getting off this crazy ride? We started the first smooth sailing since the crate revved into life and started moving. Sure, the room was rocking side to side, but it was smooth.

"Okay, almost there." the robot, I'm just going to call it a 'he' from now on, said reassuringly, "On the other side of that wall is one of the old testing tracks. There's a piece of equipment in there we're gonna need to get out of here." I think I know where he's going with this. "I think this is a docking station. Get ready…"

"Wait!" I shouted hoarsely, "Not a-!" But I couldn't finish my warning as he violently rammed the room into the wall. Thank goodness I was holding on; if I wasn't, I would've been flung out of the room and into the feasibly bottomless pit.

"Good news: that is NOT a docking station. So there's one mystery solved. I'm going to attempt a manual override on this wall. Could get a bit technical! Hold on!" My eyes widened drastically. Is he going to-yes, yes he is! I grabbed a pillow off of the bed, ducked into the closet and wrapped the pillow protectively around my head. It was dirty and by no means a helmet, but it this situation I had no choice. The second time he, the robot, crashed the room into the wall, it seemed harder than the first time and my body thudded heavily against the door. I hoped it was over, but once again the room rocked back.

'Not again! Please let this be a dream!' I watched with wide, scared eyes as we hurtled towards the wall again.

"Almost there! Remember: you're looking for a gun that makes holes. Not bullet holes, but - well, you'll figure it out. Really do hold on this time!" Again the room rocked far back and sped towards the wall at frightening speed. I ducked as far into the closet as I could and BANG! The room made one last violent crash into the wall and the sound of rubble falling, though faint, and the engine shutting down let me know that he was done tossing me around the facility. "Whew. There we go! Now I'll…where'd you go?" The device asked, apparently it came down from the ceiling. I got out of the closet and stared angrily at the sphere.

"Why do that?" I asked, doing my best to make sense and waving my arm in the direction of the opening in the wall he created.

"Ah, yes. Brilliant idea hiding in the closet there. Why…isn't really important. Now uh…" he said, dodging the question entirely, "I'll be honest, you are probably in no fit state to run this particular type of cognitive gauntlet. But…um…at least you're a good jumper and you can speak…a little. So…you've got that." I sighed as the orb rambled; it was clear a straight answer was difficult to come by with this…thing. "Just do your best, and I'll meet you up ahead." I nodded and walked to the edge of my room. The broken glass below me certainly couldn't hold my weight. I just hope I don't get trapped in that tiny room.

'If things go smoothly,' I thought, 'I should have the portal device and be free of this place in no time.' I jumped onto the glass and, as predicted, it shattered once I landed on it. I was then in a small, very familiar room; it was the same one I started my tests in at the beginning of this crazy Aperture adventure. The only difference from then is that there is no cryo bed and the radio isn't playing that obnoxious, if not familiar, tune. "Here I go." I said as the automated voice announced the starting procedure and an orange portal opened in front of me.

He may be on my side, he may be an enemy, but for now, this robot is the only thing I can count on.

Please review. I do so very much enjoy getting your opinions.