AN: So, here it is, the last chapter to this adventure. Thank-you all for you patience with the slow updates! I appreciate each and every review I've recieved!
The morning sun was rising in front of them as the jet carrying the three FBI profilers took to the skies. Though he had decided to wait for morning to head home, Rossi had chosen to leave at first light knowing they were all anxious to get back home, both for the normal reasons and because of the new arrival. JJ had finally given birth a couple of hours ago, and though the call came before his alarm went off he didn't mind receiving that news. He couldn't wait to get home to see the new baby and his new mama.
Looking around the cabin as the jet leveled off, David Rossi looked to see how his co-workers planned on passing the upcoming flight. Morgan apparently planned on catching up on sleep missed during the back to back cases, as the dark-skinned profiler was already stretched out on the bench seat with his eyes closed. The headphones covering his ears told Rossi that Morgan's tunes were the only thing he planned on hearing during the flight to the east coast. Letting his eyes drift from the apparently already sleeping agent, Rossi's gaze found the third member of their small group.
Reid had slid into one of the four seats surrounding the big table. His gaze was focused out the window, though Rossi found himself wondering if he was really seeing the view below them. He hadn't gotten a chance to talk to the younger man last night, given the time when everything had wrapped up and the fact that Reid had gotten back to the hotel later than Morgan and he had. It was as it should have been though, as the Reid family needed time to themselves following the information that this case had revealed. Spencer had probably gotten more answers than he had counted on but what remained to be seen is if those answers had made things worse or had helped.
For now, Rossi was willing to give Reid a little more time to process his thoughts. Leaning back against the comfortable chair, he withdrew the book he was currently from his go bag. He planned on using these next few hours on the plane to relax a bit as he knew there was paperwork awaiting him back in Quantico.
After reading several chapters, David Rossi placed his bookmark back in between the pages of the volume. Glancing up as he placed the book on the table, Rossi saw that Reid was still staring out the window. Deciding it was time to see if he could engage the younger man in a conversation, the veteran profiler got to his feet and headed toward the big table. Reid didn't even look his way as Rossi settled in the seat across from him.
"Must be a fascinating view to keep your attention for so long," Rossi commented, trying to break the ice.
"What?" Reid asked, looking from the window and across the table at Rossi. It was clear that the young genius hadn't heard the comment though the voice of his older colleague had caught his attention.
"It's not really important," Rossi replied, with a gentle smile. He had Spencer's attention and that was what he had been hoping to accomplish. "What is important, is how you're doing?"
Reid shrugged his shoulders and looked down at the table that separated the two of them, clearly trying to evade the question.
Not one to be put off so easily, Rossi chose to simply rephrase the question. "You came back to the hotel room late. Did you have a good visit with your parents?"
"I had an informative visit with my parents," Reid corrected, memories of the conversation he'd had with them following the case resurfacing as he reached up and started fiddling with the tie that he was wearing. "We discussed a lot of things and made some apologies. Not sure it brought us any closer but at least we cleared the air," the young genius admitted, even as he realized he was starting to count the stripes that were on his tie. As he was wearing it, and part of it was hidden, it didn't take him long to realize the futility of that task as there was no way of getting an accurate count without taking the article of clothing off. Letting the silk fall from his fingertips, Reid slowly looked up at his colleague. "How could I have been so off in my memories? I mean I have an eidetic memory. I should be able to trust the things I remember shouldn't I?"
"That's the funny thing about childhood, we tend to remember it the way we want to not necessarily the way it was," Rossi replied. "You were young when everything happened and you didn't have all the pieces of the puzzle. It's not surprising that your mind pieced what you did have, together wrong."
"Perhaps it would've been better to have listened to you and Morgan at the beginning and just let everything go. Turns out Riley's killer couldn't hurt anyone else and all I did was manage to disrupt other people's lives."
"But the truth wouldn't have been revealed. No mater what Gary Michaels did, he didn't deserve to die like he did and be buried in the desert. No matter what Lou Jenkins original intent was when he went to Michaels' house, the fact is he killed a man and covered it up. It isn't our place to decide whether that was right or wrong, but we do have the responsibility to get the truth out. That's what we did. Now it's up for the courts to decide on the punishment of all those involved."
Spencer Reid nodded, and sat back in his chair. He knew the logic and the truth to those words but that logic didn't extend to how he felt about everything. It wasn't so easy to look at things logically when the people involved included his own parents. The only thing he knew for sure was that his mother wouldn't be put through a trail. Her disease, and the fact that she had been suffering from it even then, would guarantee that. How the courts viewed his father's part in the events surrounding the murder of Gary Michaels was going to be a wait and see situation.
At least his father didn't blame him. In fact, Will Reid's last words to his son were that he was proud of his son for doing the job he had chosen to do, well despite difficult circumstances. The attorney accepted the responsibility for his actions and admitted he would do the same thing, misguided as it was, again to protect the woman he had loved. Will Reid didn't regret trying to cover up the murder of Gary Michaels to protect Diana.
"My Dad claims the only regret he has is walking out on my mom and me," Spencer said after a few moments of silence.
"Do you believe him?" Rossi asked, not sure how the conversation had made that jump and not really caring. The whole point of this talk was to let Spencer discuss his feelings instead of keeping them all jumbled up inside. Wherever the comment had come from, this was apparently what Spencer needed to discuss.
Spencer shrugged. "Does that really matter? The fact is that he did walk out on us. Nothing can change that, not even opening lines of communication with him now. Honestly, I don't think I want him back in my life. I made it this far without him. He chose to walk out of my life and as hard as it was, I made it without him. What do I owe him?"
"Absolutely nothing," Rossi replied without hesitation. Try as he may, he couldn't understand how William Reid could walk out on a child's life like that. He and Margaret might not have gotten along, but he could have never just broke off all communication with her knowing that Amber was involved. He loved his daughter. He might not have been able to be there for her as often as he should've been but he had tried his best and he'd like to believe that when it really counted he had been there for her. Will had missed twenty years of his son's life. Essentially, they were like strangers with no basis for a relationship. But he was still family.
"But there isn't just you to think about any longer," Rossi told him.
Spencer shot the older man a quizzical look, clearly not following him.
"You've got your unborn child to think about now. Perhaps you'll never have a close relationship with your father, and that's okay, but that child deserves to know who her grandfather is if at all possible. It's part of their family history."
"You're right, though what if he hurts them like he did me? What if he meets him or her and then wants nothing to do with them?"
"Then you give your child a hug, tell them how special they are, and move on with your lives. The bottom line is, you would have given him a chance. That's all that anyone can expect from you."
Spencer Reid nodded and then glanced back out the window. He couldn't see himself visiting his father like he did his mother, but perhaps a phone call now and then as he had requested wouldn't hurt anything.
"I'll do my part to keep in touch with him for that reason only. I've gotten by this long without him playing the role of father in my life, and I don't need him in that capacity now."
Rossi nodded. He had seen the hurt and anger Spencer felt toward his father when they had first gone to meet with William Reid. They were emotions that didn't fade away easily and Reid had a point. Spencer had figured out how to go on with his life without William Reid, and there was no reason he needed to change that.
"But . . . "
Spencer spoke the one word and then let it fade away, unsure of if he should actually speak the thought he was having out loud.
"Go on," Rossi encouraged, curious as to what Spencer was so hesitant to say.
"Well, it's just that, I haven't had a father in my life since I was eight but I have had father figures. Gideon and Hotch have both filled that role since I joined the bureau. And I know we had a rocky start, but, well, I do think of you in that capacity now too."
Rossi felt honored at the younger man's words. He and Spencer had been forming a closer relationship but he had still felt hesitancy from the younger man on that front. As he waited for Spencer to continue, he let himself hope that perhaps that was about to change.
"And well, I know it isn't official yet or anything but would you mind if I started calling you Dad?" Spencer asked, forcing himself not to duck his head away like he wanted to. "At least outside of work," he added quickly.
"I would be honored, son," Rossi said, smiling. He loved his daughter with all of his heart but gaining a son made him feel like his family was complete somehow. More than anything he wanted Spencer and Amber to have the happy marriage that he had never quite managed.
The house was quiet when Spencer Reid walked through the front door. While Morgan and Rossi had headed right for the hospital, Spencer had decided to stop by home first. Having been at the hospital with JJ all night, Amber had finally been persuaded to go home and get some rest. Before seeing JJ and her newborn son, Spencer wanted to check in on his fiance.
Closing the door softly behind him, Spencer made his way up the stairs. He didn't call out, not wanting to wake Amber if she was sleeping. Walking into the bedroom a few moments later, he found Amber curled up on the bed, eyes closed.
Quietly, he placed his luggage down on the floor near the closet and watched his fiance sleep for a while. Not having an idyllic childhood, Spencer wondered how he would be able to provide that for his own child. More than anything he wanted his child to grow up in a home with two parents and surrounded by love. It was something that neither he nor Amber had experienced but perhaps together they could figure out how to give their child what they hadn't had.
Spencer was about to quietly leave the room and head to the hospital when Amber stirred.
"Spencer is that you?" Amber asked sleepily from the bed, opening her eyes despite not moving from her curled up position.
"Yeah. I didn't mean to wake you. I just got in."
"Have you seen JJ and Henry yet?"
"No. I wanted to check on you first," Spencer told her, walking over to the bed and perching on the edge.
"He's a beautiful baby. I hope our baby is just as healthy and beautiful as JJ and Will's child is."
"They will be. They've got such a beautiful mother, after all."
"You're not to shabby yourself, Dr. Reid," Amber joked softly, a smile coming to her face. It faded a moment later as she recalled the case her fiance was coming home from. "How are you doing?" she asked.
"I'm okay," Spencer replied without hesitation. "I spoke with your father on the trip home. He helped me put things in perspective."
"Yeah, he does have a knack for being able to do that."
"You and I will talk tonight," Spencer assured her. "Right now, get some sleep. You and the baby need it," he told her, leaning over and kissing Amber's forehead. "I'm going to go visit JJ and come home and make dinner for us."
"I like that plan," Amber said, snuggling into her pillow a little more as she closed her eyes. "I love you, Stecchino," she whispered.
"I love you, too, Heliades," Spencer told her, giving her forehead another kiss before standing up and leaving the room.
"What is it?"* Spencer asked, unable to imagine what it was that JJ could possibly want to ask him.
"Will and I were talking and we want you to be Henry's godfather,"* JJ said, looking up at Spencer with a hopeful smile on her face.
Godfather? Spencer hadn't been expecting that. He wasn't even sure he was ready to be a father yet, and here JJ was asking him to accept this responsibility. Surely there were other people in her life that could do a better job than him. Hotch for example. Hotch was doing a wonderful job with Jack.
"I don't even know . . . I don't know . . . " *he stammered.
"Do you want to hold him?"* JJ asked, surprising her already flustered friend again.
"Um," * Spencer stammered, having never held a child before.
But JJ was already holding Henry out to him. "It's okay. Here you go,"* she said, clearly not planning on taking no for an answer.
Spencer took the child from her, staring down at the tiny life that he held in his hand. Just holding the child seemed like a huge responsibility.
"Hi. Hello Henry," * Spencer said, not sure what possessed him to talk to the child but knowing that it felt natural.
"If anything should happen to us, it's up to you and Garcia to make sure this boy gets into Yale,"* JJ said, making it clear that as far as she was concerned Spencer had already accepted the title of godfather.
Looking down at the tiny face of Henry, Spencer knew he couldn't have said no to the request. Though he hoped it was a role that he never had to fulfill, if it came to that he knew he would do his best to make sure Henry had somebody in his life that loved him and would know that his parents had loved him too.
"Oooo, Yale. Yale. You want to go to Yale, Henry? That was your godfather's safety school," Spencer told the infant, speaking out loud the silent commitment that had already been expressed between the two friends. "Don't worry, I can get you into Cal Tech with one phone call,"* he added.
Spencer Reid couldn't help but smile. Despite the awesome responsibility that had just been bestowed upon him, he had fallen in love with this boy the moment that JJ had placed him in his arms. He was going to be special and as JJ and Will were a part of his life, he knew that he would be watching his godson grow up over the years.
Spencer also realized that in a matter of months he would be holding another newborn in his arms. He didn't know who they were at this point. Didn't even know if it would be a boy or a girl but one thing he did know was that he was already in love with that child. For the first time since Amber had told him the news, he felt a connection to his unborn child.
Was he ready for fatherhood? Spencer still couldn't answer that question but as both Hotch, Will and Dave had assured him that it was something that all new fathers went through, he figured the answer to that question didn't matter. He and Amber would learn how to be parents together. They would try not to repeat the mistakes their own parents had made and learn from the mistakes that they were sure to make.
Holding Henry in his arms, the one thing Spencer did know for sure was that he wanted this child. He and Amber loved one another and their child would be a testament to that love just as Henry was a testament to the love that JJ and Will shared. Whether he was ready for childhood or not, it was coming and he owed it to his child to do the best job he could. One thing he knew for sure, he would not voluntarily walk away from his kid like his own father had done to him and maybe knowing that was enough for now.
"Are you okay, Spence?" JJ asked softly.
Reid looked away from Henry and down at JJ. "Yeah, I'm fine. Everything is going to be okay," he told her, knowing that she didn't have access to his thoughts. The smile that JJ gave him though told him that she understood.
For him and Amber, the impending birth of their child and the upcoming wedding were signs of the life they were going to share together.
*Dialogue from the episode "Mermoriam"