ALL I WANT

© 2013

Summary

When Hotaru decided to go to Tokyo to study in the same school where her idol goes to, Mikan made a decision to follow her. On her trip, she met a lad. What she didn't know was that their short trip together would be the start of her grand adventure.

Disclaimer

GA characters, places, and etc. Those others I might mention in the future will be specified.

Formerly entitled, He's Mine, She's Mine

Chapter One – The First Meeting

I wouldn't.

That was what I would always respond whenever my parents, friends, or teacher—or just people in general—asked me if I'd like to study in the city. I liked it here. I liked being in my comfort zone with the home and people I grew up with. It's not much of a province here, but the air's good and living didn't ask too many requirements. In short, I led a simple life.

But probably, it's just because I'm scared of going out there. I guess I'm not that strong myself, despite how others thought of me as someone strong-willed. There are a lot of flaws in me, just like in every other people. Maybe I'm just better at hiding them.

There's this one person who didn't watch blindly, though. She saw through me. It's scary; most of the times, to have someone know you more than you do yourself. Unfortunately, she's not here. She ran away.

My crazy, evil best friend, Hotaru Imai, suddenly decided to study in Tokyo. Auntie Kyoko, her mother, rang me early this morning to tell me this news. She went to our house then and showed me the note that Hotaru left on their fridge.

Mom,

I'm going to Tokyo. Dad knows. Don't worry about me. I'll take care of myself.

Love, Hotaru

Hotaru's dad was somewhere in Washington, working in a big corporation as a chemical engineer. Now that Hotaru left, Auntie's alone with Subaru, Hotaru's younger brother.

"Do you know why she wants to study there?" Auntie Kyoko asked, her brows furrowed into a thin line.

"No," I shook my head. "She hardly mentions anything to me these past few days. It must be because of this."

"That child, really. What am I going to do now?"

Mom came in carrying a tray. She handed a glass of orange juice to Auntie and then sat beside me. "Have you tried calling her?"

I reached for my phone and speed dialed Hotaru's number. It was off. "I've tried many times. Calling her is a futile attempt."

Mom looked at me and I could see it swirling in her eyes. The unmistakable, tiniest of a grin hiding in the corner of her lips was waiting for me to say the words out loud.

Sighing, I turned to Auntie. "I can look for her, if that's alright with you."

"Oh, you don't have to do that Mikan. I cannot impose that on you," she replied.

"But if she's willing… you don't have to feel guilty about it, Kyoko. Mikan suggested it herself," mom said. She knew I didn't suggest it myself. She wanted me to. "Besides, it's a great chance for you, Mikan. If it's you, you will be able to change Hotaru's mind."

"I guess so," I said.

"You have a point. But what if Hotaru doesn't want to go home?"

Mom cocked her head to the side. "Well then, Mikan can study with Hotaru there. I'm sure Izumi wouldn't mind. If Mikan studies there, then he could have time with his daughter. He'll come home when he could. What do you say, Mikan?"

"You've already thought about it, mom. Whatever do I have to add?"

It was obvious that mom wanted me to try the life in the city. Now I couldn't say those same words anymore. It'd never be: I wouldn't. It had to be the opposite of it.

The ride from our town to Tokyo would take approximately five hours. That was what the pamphlet I was reading said.

Really, I couldn't understand mom. Just yesterday, she was all keyed-up about me going to Tokyo. After Auntie Kyoko left, she hurriedly opened my closet and took out my luggage bag. But right now, she's all teary.

"Do you have everything you need there? Money? ID? Clothes?" mom said, sniffling.

I nodded. "Yes, mom. Don't worry, I got it all covered. You're embarrassing me in front of these people."

"Right, of course, I don't wanna do that. It's just that I'm going to miss you," she added with a hiccup. She reached for me and hugged me tightly.

The ear-deafening sound of the train approached, and soon, it came into our view. I thought of the far-away Tokyo in its happiest state, but all I could think about was that I didn't feel anything for it. All I wanted was to bring Hotaru back and continue living in my hometown. Both of that were impossible, though. So as I boarded the train, I just thought of dad. He would pick me up on the other end of this metal road.

I found a seat in the corner and set myself beside the window. Outside, mom was waving and crying at the same time. Her hazel eyes were glassy and terribly wet. I didn't want to see her like that so I waved back at her. I could feel a certain pressure rising beneath my skin but I stopped it before it came out in the corners of my eyes.

The train started vibrating harder and the metals clunked against each other louder. The next thing I knew, it was already moving again, towards the open fields of green that bordered our town. Above them the sky was a color of luminous white and soft blue. I wonder if Hotaru gazed at the same view when she suddenly left for Tokyo, without any proper goodbyes to the people she lived and grew up with.

The truth was the first time I heard about her action, I didn't know what to feel. I was surprised. However, I didn't know if I was to feel happy or sad. I was happy because I thought that Hotaru finally did something she wanted to do. I was proud of her as a best friend. But then I also felt sad because she left me alone. Then angry, because she didn't tell me anything. I was left clueless. And after all that, I just wanted her to tell me why she did that. What was her reason?

If I were the one who ran away, Hotaru would have probably known already why I did that. But she was the one who did it, and I had no idea why.

"Excuse me."

"Huh?" I turned my head to a lad standing beside the empty chair across me. He was wearing a darkly polarized shades and cap.

"Do you mind if I can sit here?" he asked. He had that kind of deep voice that I couldn't describe properly.

He looked like a dangerous person, but there was just something different that I couldn't pinpoint now that told me he'd never try anything rash.

I shrugged, nonchalantly. "It's okay."

He nodded at me and then looked around before he sat. He must've noticed that I was looking at him, because he pulled his cap down and pulled out a manga from his duffel bag and read. I averted my eyes away and decided to keep to myself.

I guess I fell asleep because I awoke with a jolt when the train halted. When I opened my eyes, he was staring at me. Or at least I think he was. He had his eyes concealed after all.

"The train broke down or something. They advised the passengers to go down first," he told me with a hesitant and a bit of irritated voice.

"Oh… okay," I replied. He had already left by the time I gathered my backpack and got up.

We were kilometers away from my hometown now. Although the area we stopped weren't that different from my hometown, it was still different. The air smelled a bit sweet. There could be sugar farms somewhere near.

The passengers were scattered outside. Most of them were going inside the shops and restaurants. These must be a common train stop.

Feeling a bit hungry myself, I went inside a small restaurant and ordered a sandwich and milk. I chose a seat near the door so that if ever the train's about to leave, I'd know immediately.

The chimes hanging by the door of the restaurant tinkled when the door opened. The guy before came in and bought a can of soda. He walked towards me and pulled the chair on the other side of my table.

"You don't mind, do you?" he asked. Now his tone was certain.

"I don't," I took a bite of my sandwich.

"I'm a complete stranger to you," he stated in a matter of fact. He opened his can and a 'pop' sound came when the lock was off.

Now I'm the one confused. "I'm pretty sure I don't know you."

He removed his shades and drank his soda. His eyes were still concealed by his long raven bangs but I could see the color of fire looking at me. "I don't know you either," he said.

"Why should you want to know me?" I asked.

He shrugged. "I didn't say that."

I sipped my milk from its straw before speaking again. "But you do. That's why you're playing this game."

He let out a deep, amused laugh. "Maybe I'm a killer or a criminal?"

I drank again. "Don't worry. I'm sure you aren't. And it's Mikan."

"How are you sure?" he asked, smiling.

"I just get that feeling," I said.

"You're good," he nodded. "I'm Natsume. Nice to meet you, Mikan," he held out a hand.

His hand, when I touched it, was warm and felt nice.

"So do you travel a lot?" Natsume asked once we were back to the train.

I was still a bit of uncertain, but I guess it wouldn't hurt to talk to someone I deemed not dangerous or anything close to that. My mom said not to talk to strangers, but I knew his name and he knew mine, too, so we're not really strangers to each other.

"Not really. Not alone, either," I said.

"You don't look like it, anyway. Your face says it. Like right now, you're frowning."

I didn't know I was frowning or anything. I thought I'm keeping everything cool. From a glance on the window, the scenery changed into a field of blooming daisies.

"Where are you headed to?" he asked.

"Tokyo," I answered shortly.

"I mean, where exactly?"

"I'm not sure. I'm supposed to find someone, but…"

Natsume blinked before he squinted at me. "But what?"

I took in a deep breath. "Do you ever get that feeling, like, you have this urge to never get off your bus or train and you just join the ride until it stops? It doesn't matter whether you enjoy it or not, you just stay there because it's the only thing that gives you peace."

Natsume didn't say anything. He just sat there, with his ripped denim jacket and cap, looking through me.

"Do you feel at peace?" he finally spoke up, breaking the bed of silence between us. "If you do, then you can stay put. But remember that while you're at it, the world does not stop revolving. And when the ride ends, you have to get off, and you'll be shocked at how everybody has changed. You'll find yourself behind and alone, and nothing's changed."

"Are you at peace?" I asked him back.

Natsume shook his head, but half-way, he paused and smiled a little. I couldn't understand why I felt anxious over that. "I'm fifty percent at peace, or so."

"I see."

He stood up and took the seat beside me. He was just about to open his lips when I cut him off.

"I don't mind," I said, giving him space.

"I'll keep you company. So don't worry, I'll wake you up and we'll leave the train together," he said.

I kept my head down to hide the faint blush forming on my cheeks. Hearing him say this and close to me was something else.

"You're really good at this, aren't you?" I asked, biting the inside of my gums. "You must have flirted with a lot of girls before."

Natsume laughed lowly. "I appreciate the thought. But for now," he added, "just relax and let the world move."

A/n: Hello, I am back again. I know many of you are disappointed that I am changing the story, but I feel happy with what I am doing and coming back in Ffn. As you can see, I changed the title as well. In short, I am giving this story a make-over. I hope you will support me and still like this story after the changes I've made. This is the pilot chapter and I pray that you'll like it. :)