CHAPTER 1- The mission and a pencil

Hello everyone

So here is me at 2 am getting a sudden urge to write another story. So basically I know the undercover bit is a classic but I'll try to spice it up a bit as the stories go on.

So yes I hope you enjoy it. Huge Simon Baker's fan here. I hope Lisbon and Jane will one day get together or at least that the show will offer more flirtatious funny scenes between them.

DISCLAIMER: I do not own The Mentalist. If I did Lisbon and Jane would already have gotten married by now :P

READ, ENJOY and Reviews are very much appreciated

Teresa Lisbon hated to be woken up at 7:30 every morning to go to work. However what Lisbon hated even more, was being woken up at 6:30 by the sound of her cell-phone.

'This better be worth it.' She mumbled as she picked up the buzzing phone.

'Lisbon.' She tried to say hiding her lack of sleep in her tone.

'This is Officer Murray. I am afraid we have a situation here regarding a certain Patrick Jane. He asked us to call you, I am afraid he needs you to bail him out.'

Lisbon closed her eyes in frustration. 'What did he do this time?'

[…]

'Do not punch him in the nose when you see him. Stay calm Lisbon, control your urges.' She told herself as she entered the police station.

'Hello I am here to post bail for Patrick Jane. An officer called me.'

'Oh yes thank god you are here to get him out of here. He has been nothing but trouble. How do you ever get him to shut up? Because dear god the man can't stop talking!'

'Oh believe me I know…' Lisbon sighed.

A few minutes later Lisbon could hear the sound of a voice she so well knew and so often irritated her to the point of having sudden urges for violence.

'Ah Lisbon how lovely of you to be here. Have you met Officer Murray over here? Lovely fellow. However didn't want to bring me a cup of tea when I was quite thirsty.'

'Oh Jane how tragic! Your life must be so difficult right now.' Lisbon responded, her voice dripping with sarcasm.

'I know Lisbon. That is why we should definitely go for tea afterwards. I am parched.'

'Here are all the papers. Let me just tell you I admire you as his wife. He must be quite a handful.'

Lisbon opened her mouth in protest but Jane was quicker as he grabbed her by the waist and smiled.

'Oh well you wouldn't believe it like this but this one is a fighter. And you will never find someone more stubborn than her. She's feisty. Aren't you darling?' He winked at her. As much as she wanted to kill him right now, she forced herself to smile.

'Sure sweetheart. Says the man who just got into prison for trespassing on private property.'

'In my defense I didn't know you couldn't go in a museum at night. Last I knew, museums were public places. Plus it's not like I actually entered the damn monument, I was just having a nice night stroll in the gardens, which were just lovely by the way, quite the romantic spot we should definitely go sometimes honey. This time I promise you, it will be in broad day light when it is legal to take a stroll there.'

'That sounds like such a wonderful idea. Well that is if you are alive until then because I am not sure you are going to survive much longer if I have to bail you out of prison again.'

'Watch your words dear. Death threats are actually serious in a police station. Therefore I ask you Officer Murray to be my first witness at the stand if she ever attempts murder.'

'Yes sure. Sign here and you are good to go.' Lisbon did so, mumbled a vague thank you at the officer and stepped out of the station followed by her consultant.

As soon as they were out she turned around to face him. Her eyes were sparkling with anger.

'Right now I am trying my best to not punch you in the nose.'

'Oh please Lisbon for the trespassing it was just atrocious, I mean the gate was open I didn't know it was closed at night.'

'Who goes for a walk at four in the morning?'

'I couldn't sleep. And secondly if you are mad about the whole husband and wife thing, let me say you are an excellent actress. Are you sure you haven't taken drama before?'

'Oh please Jane that was only for your own amusement.'

'Well it was entertaining nonetheless. And you loved it admit it.' He smirked at her.

'Oh please. I loved being married to you? Now that's impossible because you are the biggest pain in the ass I know.'

'But you find me charming.'

'I… I… no I don't! See arrogance and annoyance are usually not something I found charming in a man.'

'Oh Lisbon this could have been such a good comeback without the stammer and the hesitant pauses in between. Oh but it is okay you find me charming, I have been told that quite a few times.'

'Oh and modest, which is also part of your charm I'm guessing?'

'Well Lisbon you are coming around to it. I am proud you have finally accepted your attraction towards me.'

Lisbon stopped to face him. Anger once again took over her self-controlled rationalism.

'Stop flattering yourself! I do not hold any attraction towards you! I'll admit you are charming, for those who find being pompous charming but that stops there!'

'I believe you've just jumped from denial to anger.' He retorted wittingly.

'Just get in the car Jane!'

'Only if you admit you're attracted to me.'

'Fine then stay here. I don't care.' She got into the car but before she could start the engine, Jane opened the door and got in.

She looked at him, raising one eyebrow and trying her best not to smile.

'I want tea and for that I need to go back to the office.'

'Yes right. Tea not defeat.' Lisbon responded.

'Who said I was defeated? Even if you didn't admit it out loud yet doesn't be your attraction for me isn't true.' He wiggled his eyebrows as she just sighed desperately.

[…]

They had been in the office for a few hours now and Lisbon had ignored him since she had stepped in her own office. Jane was getting bored when Van Pelt approached him.

'Hightower wants to see you and Lisbon in her office. She said it was urgent.'

'Thank you Van Pelt. I'll get Lisbon.' He said a little too joyfully which worried the red head who couldn't imagine what he was up to. He noticed Lisbon's frustration towards him since this morning but she knew he would just continue to tease her nevertheless.

Jane approached Lisbon's office and leaned against the doorframe, watching her. She suddenly noticed his presence but merely gave him a glance and focused back to the files lying on her table. Jane simply smirked.

'Lisbon I came to ask you a very important question.'

Lisbon raised her head as he approached her slowly, making the scene dramatic. He looked at her deep in her eyes and uttered slowly :

'Teresa Lisbon, will you marry me?'

'Whaaat?' she blurted out, opening her eyes in shock.

Jane couldn't help but laugh. 'You should see your face right now. Priceless is a bit of an understatement.'

'Jane what do you want? Before I actually throw a stapler in you face!'

'Let's not get feisty shall we. Hightower wants to see us.'

She mumbled a few curses and they both walked to their boss's office.

'Jane, Lisbon come quickly. I have a mission for the both of you.'

'We are here Boss.' Lisbon responded as they both sat in front of her.

'Are you familiar with the name Lorenzo Van Miletto?'

'Billionaire. Owns like half of Los Angeles. Banker I believe.' Jane suddenly responded as Lisbon gave him an intrigued look for this surprising knowledge as he usually hated rich people.

'Well he was killed a few days ago. However we believe one of his partners did it. But as you might have guessed the world Mr. Van Miletto lived in is quite impenetrable and without actually being on the inside we will never know the truth. When a killer has resources, it is impossible to catch him.'

'And what can we do to help then?' Lisbon asked as Jane only smiled, knowing very well what was coming.

'Well I believe our dear boss wants the both of us to go undercover.'

'Undercover? But as what…?' she asked a tad confused.

'Well you and Mr. Jane here will be portraying a rich couple and will infiltrate the world of Mr. Van Miletto.'

Lisbon opened her eyes flabbergasted. 'I'm sorry what? Me? Him? Couple? Oh no, no, no, no, no,no and no.'

'Seriously Lisbon seven no's? Now that is just hurtful.' Jane teased.

'Don't worry Lisbon it won't be for long.'

'Why can't Van Pelt do it?'

'Because Van pelt isn't as experienced as you are and Jane is an excellent actor. He will be very useful and you will be there in case anything happens.'

Lisbon looked at her feet. Why me? She thought.

'Well Agent, Jane, I will give you all the information tomorrow as your mission will start in two days. And do not worry Lisbon it won't be for a long time.'

Lisbon nodded and they both stepped out of the office.

'Come on Lisbon it won't be so bad. You did admit you find me charming.'

'Oh please Jane! This is the worse mission ever! I have not only to spend most of my time with you, but I also have to spend that time actually playing your girlfriend!'

'Well think of it that way: maybe after that you will start to embrace your attraction towards and truly…' He didn't finish his sentence as she threw a pencil at his chest which she grabbed from Rigby's table.

'See now that's the spirit! But it kinda hurt though. Let's try it with less enthusiasm shall we?'

Lisbon only shut the door to her office. God this was going to be a long week…