Disclaimer: I don't own the Teen Titans.

Would You Shut The-

"Hurry up Raven," the young alien giggled and ducked behind the couch.

A phase of black shimmered in the corner of the room and the alien giggled again.

"Shut the f-"

"FRIEND RAVEN!"

"What?" she snapped. Honestly people jumped to the worst conclusions.

"Friend Robin says to never do of the cursing in which is the bad,"

Silence greeted the alien girl. She giggled and reached out to the swirling spot of powers her friend had created. She reached into the portal unafraid and grasped her friend and with a mighty tug pulled her into the room.

"I wasn't going to use profanity. I was just telling you to shut the f-"

Starfire clasped her hand tightly over the empath's mouth. She glared daggers at her friend but fell silent as she heard the approaching footsteps.

"Ugh, Star. See what I mean? Now it's going to be ruined-"

"Friend Raven would you kindly do the shutting the-"

This time Raven slammed her hand over the alien's mouth in return knowing that the words that would have slipped from her mouth would have been anything but innocent. They crouched in silence behind the couch as the male members of the team wandered into random places around the living room. Without a sound Raven enveloped herself and Starfire into her soul self and teleported them outside the hallway door.

The girls grinned at each other before walking into the main room. Raven glanced at the door worriedly as she walked calmly into the kitchen to make herself some tea. The plan wouldn't be complete until she could activate it. If only Starfire hadn't over reacted right before the boys had gotten home…

Careful to avoid any unwanted interest Raven scooted to the edge of the kitchen. With a gentle flick of her wrist she levitated a bucket full of some sort of goop to rest on the edge of the door. Raven was involving herself in a typical prank that was intended for Beast Boy for switching Raven and Starfire's shampoo earlier in the week. It seemed childish and she grimaced at the thought of stooping to his level but the kid needed to learn.

Besides it was a little fun planning all these details out with Starfire, even if it was childish.

Raven face palmed herself and her powers wavered slightly causing the bucket to roll and slosh quietly. She inhaled sharply and peered about the room, no one had noticed. Now was not the time to think of consequences and reactions. Now was the time to finally get on the score board of Beast Boy's never ending parade of pranks.

How ridiculously childish was this? The bucket had reached its destination. With a gentle nudge of her powers it was secured in place.

"So what are you doing Raven?" Robin's voice was surprisingly close to her and caused her to jump in reaction.

"I'm making tea," she responded coolly. Holding up her empty mug for his inspection and looking pointedly over his should for the tea kettle… The tea kettle that was still hidden away in its place under the cabinet.

Without even looking over his shoulder and keeping his gaze locked with hers he raised an eye brow and questioned, "Where's the water?"

Of course Mr. Side-Kick-to-the-Famous-World-Renowned-Detective would notice the missing kettle.

"I was just getting it," she brushed past him as she strode to the kettle's resting place.

"You've been in the kitchen an awfully long time to be sitting there holding an empty mug," his voice was laced with mischief and curiosity.

"I didn't know I had a time limit to every activity I did,"

"Of course you do. If this was out in battle we would need you to left an object a lot heavier than a bucket and discreetly knock out an enemy from behind," his eye brow quirked higher on his scalp showing his interest.

"To be honest your technique could use a bit of work,"

Raven bit back a response and focused on pulling the kettle out leisurely from its proper place. She continued ignoring him as he paced closer to her as she filled it with water from the sink. He wasn't going to say anything; the prank wasn't even aimed at him. She could feel his gaze on her back as she reached over the stove to click it on. Through their bond she could feel his judgment of her childish behavior. She rolled her shoulders in annoyance. Was she not allowed to pull a simple prank?

"Ignoring me isn't going to stop me from revealing this,"

She turned to glare at him.

"You have never stopped Beast Boy,"

He gapped at her.

"Of course I have. Just last week I kept him from replacing all your favorite tea with bags full of pepper,"

"I would have noticed that,"

He smiled sheepishly, his cheeks tinged pink. He rubbed the back of his neck trying to think of a response.

"You boys are all in league with each other and you let Beast Boy take the blame for all the pranks and since you are my boyfriend you are like a double agent. That's why you stop some pranks but play obvious to others,"

She felt surprisingly calm as she saw him tense at her statement, all the affirmation she needed to know. She needed to act quickly if she wanted to retaliate now. This was the start of a war. Starting with Beast Boy, she would get revenge on the other two some other time.

"Hey BB get in here,"

She heard him in the main room scuffle quickly to the kitchen, his face white with dread.

"I think I left some things in the car will you go grab them?"

He nodded a look of pure relief on his face.

"What are you planning Rae," Robin asked.

"I thought it was obvious," she responded nonchalantly. She knew Robin knew and smirked at him hoping to cause dread for what she had in store for him now. He had told her he had seen the bucket. This was just a pretense of the leader having a blind eye. Later he could claim he had no idea what was going on. Robin was fraternizing with the enemy. Robin was dating the enemy. She would have to get harsh revenge on him later.

The tea kettle began to whistle loudly giving Raven a chance to turn her back to Robin.

Rule Number One. In war you never turn your back on the enemy. Suddenly she found herself pinned with dangerously hot water held tightly in her hand unable to move in fear of scalding herself. She felt Robin's hot breath blow against her ear.

"Looks like I should get some sort of thanks for letting you do this…" his voice trailed off suggestively.

"For doing what?" she asked innocently.

He responded by grabbing her hip and spinning her around to face him, pulling the hot kettle from her hands and placing it back on the stove. He tilted her chin up pausing.

"You are playing the traitor Robin," she gritted. Wanting desperately to lean up and steal a kiss.

"Oh I know. It's worth it," He sealed their lips together tentatively at first and then with a growing passion.

"Ravennnnnn. I can't find it!"

She pulled away from Robin and winked.

"That's fine… Oh and Hey Beast Boy,"

"Yeah?"

"Would you Shut the… Front Door,"

She heard Starfire gasp from the other room and smiled to herself. Knowing the alien girl thought that was the profane language.

Three seconds later the tower was filled with the anguished cry of Beast Boy.

"I LOOK LIKE A SMURF… OH GROSS THIS CRAP WON'T COME OFF,"

Robin's face paled lightly as he glanced down at his girlfriend who rolled on the floor unable to hold in her laughter.

"You think that's bad… just wait… you're … next," still laughing uncontrollably she rose from the floor and placed a chaste kiss on his cheek before exiting the room.

This was the start of war.

AN: My attempt at humor... Let me know if that completely failed or not...