This is a one-shot, written for Eleanor, because she needed a fluffy remedy to A Moonless Sky, and because I adore her.

Here Comes the Bride

As she looked out upon the torrent of heavy rain outside her bedroom window, Tonks found herself hoping that there was a saying that went: the more awkward and disastrous the wedding, the better the marriage. It was certainly shaping up to be a winner; the rain was the type that came in lashing, vertical waves, and Molly had organised the ceremony to be held in a large tent. She had thought, in the days prior, that the bright and sunny weather of August would keep them safe, but looking out now, she found herself wondering just how loyal her guests would be.

The pale yellow dress hung on a hook next to the window, and Tonks played with the silky fabric idly, wondering whether it would turn translucent when soaked. She couldn't imagine saying her vows through chattering teeth, trying to blink away idle raindrops that escaped from her hair down into her eyes. She tried to imagine Remus, soaked through, professing his love and devotion to her, but found herself rather lacking in inspiration. She simply couldn't imagine it.

The rain would have no longer than two hours to clear. Because she was marrying Remus and that was the end of it.

In her childhood bedroom, she had lain out the essentials; shoes, earrings, and a small flower to pin to her hair. She was determined this time to overcome her terminal lateness. Merlin knew that if she gave him enough time, Remus would probably try and do a runner, mumbling to himself that he was too old, too poor, too much of an arse, and find a conveniently placed wall to bang his head on repeatedly in a fit of self-depreciation. In fact, she was more than convinced that he was staring out of his own window in the spare bedroom and pondering how the rain was an omen for his own unworthy soul.

But she loved him; more than she could possibly say.

The night apart had been almost unbearable. Suddenly the short corridor between them in her parents' house seemed so short; short enough to dash down and crawl into the spare bed. But still, when she had lay amongst the memories of her childhood, the sound of his breathing through many walls seemed miles away. She wondered if he'd slept; she could imagine him tossing and turning for hours.

The truth was though, that if they had been in the same bed, both in such a restless state, Tonks would not have been able to avoid the embarrassing conversation the next morning when her parents complained about keeping the noise down and waiting until the honeymoon...

Tonks felt her face flush.

She focused her energy on morphing her hair; the mousy brown had made an appearance after a night of restless sleep, and she scrunched her nose up. As hard as she tried, the only colour she could manage was her well-practiced pink, which would clash horribly with her dress. She tried again, and found herself stuck with the vibrant colour that she usually loved. The stress had clearly gotten to her.

"Nymphadora..."

Andromeda had made an appearance, wrapped in a flannel robe. She frowned at her daughters pink hair.

"Really, Nymphadora, for your wedding day?"

Tonks sighed in exasperation and tried again, succeeding only in muting some of the florescent intensity. She thought back to when she had sat her N.E.; her hair had remained in bright orange curls for weeks, and she had been unable to do anything about it. Snape had reported her to Dumbledore, claiming that her bright coif would distract others in the examinations.

"I'm trying, Mum, but it won't shift," Tonks sighed, and fiddled shakily with a lipstick on her dresser.

Andromeda did the best with the little that she had, fixing Tonks' lurid hair with the small white flower and fluffing the short mess until it looked vaguely presentable. Tonks muttered and winced when the primping tugged at her scalp and made faces of disapproval into the mirror. For Andromeda's part, she managed to ignore her daughter's grumblings.

"Mum...I was thinking..." Tonks began, her eyes flickering over to the small, unsteady looking heels that had been assigned to her unlucky feet. "Maybe I shouldn't wear those shoes? I mean...I don't think that my work boots would look amiss."

"Absolutely not," Andromeda said through gritted teeth, sliding a clip into Tonks' hair. "I married your father in my work robes and I've regretted it ever since. We don't have any nice photographs. I didn't even have time to do anything to my hair. I'm not going to have that for you."

"But if it carries on raining like this then my feet will get soaked..."

"You'll be under the tent," Andromeda insisted, and Tonks saw her glance uneasily out of the window.

The hours passed too quickly, and before she knew it Tonks was pulling herself into the gentle silk embrace of her dress. It was cool and fluttered around her calves, and she loved it...but her hair did clash horribly...

She had intended to be blonde.

Andromeda was muttering, and Tonks wondered who she was trying to reassure. She straightened her daughters dress, and scurried off to change into her own, leaving Tonks to gaze into the mirror and sulk. The flower hung limply against her head, and as she slid her feet into the stupid little shoes, she pondered she felt her feet begin to wobble.

She heard the door click open, and turned, expecting to see her mother. Instead, Remus was leaning against the doorway, his hair neatly brushed, wearing an amused smile.

Tonks sniffed, and covered herself with her robe. "That's bad luck, Lupin. And what are you smirking at?"

"I overheard you mother talking about how you couldn't change your hair."

"Well, bully for you," Tonks muttered grumpily, running a self-conscious hand through her coif.

"You're perfect," he told her, and Tonks looked up into his honest eyes. He was staring at her as though he'd come home; as though he saw nothing else, and Tonks felt her face flush. And then he was gone, and the door had closed behind him with a little chink.

"Dad, can you carry me?"

Tonks felt her heartbeat pick up in the howling wind. Her legs were trembling with cold and nerves, and Ted Tonks patted her hand soothingly where it lay in the crook of his elbow. They stood in the back yard of Shell Cottage, the small marquee sheltering them. She could hear the gentle hum of conversation from their half a dozen guests

"You'll be fine, Dora," Ted reassured, his voice low as everyone went silent. He signalled that she should start walking, and she did, feeling the damp squelch of her shoes as they hit the sodden carpet that had been rained on for a good half an hour.

Remus stood at the top of the very short aisle, looking every inch the conflicted groom. His dress robes looked a little worn, but his eyes were bright as they willed her forwards. She almost forgot about her hair, and her dress...and her feet.

"Ouch!"

She saw him wince in sympathy for her as her thin heel gave way under her foot, and her ankle was forced to the side. Molly gasped and rose from her garden chair, but Tonks gave her a brave smile and carried on, limping the last few steps. Her father seemed reluctant to let her go, but Remus gave her a weak smile and urged her to lean heavily against his arm.

They said their vows, and thankfully, they went without a hitch. The man who married them was an ex-Ministry official, and while their joining would not appear on the Ministry records, the ceremony had still been performed, and their hands had still been bound. Tonks struggled a little with the ring, and pondered over when his finger had gotten so bloody big.

"I now declare you man and wife..."

Tonks laughed triumphantly and shifted herself up to kiss him, her arms winding around his neck for support. Everyone cheered, but then Tonks became increasingly aware of the fact that the kiss was far wetter than was really normal...in fact, her hair seemed to be getting wet...

She looked up in time to see the small rip in the roof of the tent give way under the relentless rain, and promptly received a face full of rainwater.

They managed to manoeuvre themselves out of the way of the leak, and they shared a proper kiss, laughing into each other's mouths and endeavouring to keep weight off Tonks' twisted ankle.

They had been promised a room at the Three Broomsticks, but when they arrived in Hogsmeade they found the little pub closed and dark. Tonks shivered in her cloak and huddled closer to Remus, who was leading her steadily down the road towards the Hogs Head.

"Really, Remus? Can't we just go back to Mum and Dad's?"

Remus leant down to nuzzle at her ear. "I've spent three nights away from you," he explained in a low voice. "I would rather pollute the Hogs Head with noise than face having to look your father in the eye tomorrow morning. Come on, it's not like the bed is going to collapse."

"I'm more concerned with what will be in the bed with us," she muttered.

"It's our wedding night," he protested gently, and pushed open the door for her. "We can make the best of it. Besides, today can't really be topped in terms of...unfortunate events."

They paid Aberforth for a night in a room upstairs. And were soon alone. Tonks sighed against his mouth as he gently pressed her against the closed door, enjoying her as his wife. The room wasn't lit, and Tonks wondered whether it would ever be, as Remus certainly seemed to have a one-track mind that wouldn't be deterred. She ran her fingernails up his arms, shed him of his sodden cloak and soon he was pushing her onto the bed.

She didn't have time to think about pink hair or rain or wilting flowers, and even her twisted ankle seemed dulled as he shimmied her out of her dress and flung it out of sight. Her underwear followed, and she moaned as he stroked her into frenzy, his skin cool in contrast to the wedding band that grazed her skin.

It didn't take long before he was upon her, sliding within her and making her moan with the long awaited release of their union. She made love to her husband, her cries vocal. In fact the whole room seemed to be vocal; the echoes of their moans and the adjoining moan of the bed...

The bed which collapsed under them with an almighty crash. Tonks yelled out in shock, and surveyed Remus from a cloud of dust. He stared at her in pure shock, his hair rumpled.

"Remus...are you a seer?"

Their laughs soon dissipated the stunned silence; huge, belly-aching laughs which echoed through their hearts. The absurdity of the day tickled them mercilessly, and Tonks didn't mind that nothing had gone to plan, because when had they ever been conventional?

It was perfect, and Remus soon carried on making love to her, mindful of the wood splinters that now lay around the squeaky of mattress.

They were going to be just fine.

This is very loosely inspired by Charlotte's wedding to Harry in Sex and the City. Please leave a review.