Yu-Gi-Oh is the intellectual property of Kazuki Takahashi and Konami, and is being used in this fanfiction for fan purposes only. No infringement or disrespect is intended by this fanfiction.

Description: Two CEOs, one bet: Can Pegasus and Kaiba handle working side-by-side in an ordinary job? For two weeks? Without killing each other? CHAPTER EIGHT: Home at last. The wager is settled, some loose ends are tied up, and Roland loses his cell phone.

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World's Worst, Chapter 8: A Return and a Departure
by Animom


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It was a perfect day. The sun, though shining down from a cloudless sky, was considerate, stopping just short of being too hot. The breeze swirling up from the ocean was cool enough to soothe, but not cold enough to chill. The local birds, having eaten every pesky insect on the island, were singing their gratitude just loud enough to be charming rather than annoying to the two men in Hawaiian shirts and swim trunks who sat in lounge chairs next to the enormous infinity pool.

"We'll finish this today," Croquet said, paging though the Bartender's Book he'd taken from the excessively well-stocked bar on the mansion's ocean-facing patio.

"Oh? How many are left?" Roland, whose speech could charitably be described as "somewhat slurred," had to try several times before his mouth connected to the straw in the large ceramic pineapple containing his drink.

"Six. Planter's Punch, Rum Runner, Sex on the Beach, Singapore Sling, Ward Eight, and Zombie."

"I can't decide which one is my favorite!" Roland said. "I love all of them! Daiquiri, and that tea, and the gin thing … "

Flipping back to the table of contents, Croquet read, "Bacardi Cocktail, Bahama Mama, Between the Sheets, Blue Hawaiian, Chi Chi, Daiquiri, French 75, Gin Fizz, Hurricane, Jack Rose, Long Island Iced Tea, Lynchburg Lemonade, Mai Tai, and Margarita." He counted. "Fourteen. Fifteen if you count the Piña Coladas we have now."

"Do you know," Roland asked, pushing up his sunglasses up for emphasis, "why Between the Sheets comes before Sex on the Beach?"

"Because they're listed alphabetically?" the other replied, half-listening.

"No, because otherwise you'd get sand in the bed!" Not seeing a response, he added very earnestly, "It's, you know, because you'd have sand on your feet from the," his voice dropped to a stage whisper, "beach sex, and it would rub off once you got between the sheets!" He nodded. "I think of these things. I'm a detail man."

"Maybe we'll just stop at Piña Colada," Croquet said primly, closing the book. "After all, we have tried more than two-thirds of the recipes."

"Awww!" Roland said. Deflated into silence, he noisily sipped his pineapple until it was empty, then – after peering into it to make sure that no alcohol was hiding – he set it down next to his lounge chair. "This has been really great, hasn't it?"

"Hm."

"I'm glad you let me stay here."

"It made the most sense." Croquet looked over at Roland. "I could have spent the time by myself, but the company of a friend supposedly makes a vacation more more enjoyable."

"Oh!" Roland made a sniffing sound. "Do you – do you truly think of me as your friend?"

"I don't see why I wouldn't. After all, we do have quite a number of things in common."

A second later Roland had flung himself across the space between them to half-strangle Croquet in an awkward bear hug. "Thank you."

"No need to get maudlin," Croquet said, attempting to disentangle himself.

"Hey!" Roland said. "You have little pieces of pineapple on your mustache." He realized a moment later that a) attempting to nibble fruit off Croquet's mustache bordered on over-familiarity and b) he was very very drunk. Far drunker than he'd ever been… ever. "I'd better sit down."

'That might be wise." A moment later Croquet clarified, "Over there. Not over here."

"Oh." Roland, abashed, wobbled his way back to his own chair.

"I'm going to make us some coffee," an equally flustered Croquet said, and then hurried inside.

Roland hugged himself once Croquet was out of sight. "Coffee is good."

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Some time later – after Croquet had brought out a tray of sandwiches and coffee and reluctantly returned the incompletely-explored Bartender's Book to the bar – Roland said, "Mokuba didn't call today, did he?"

"No," Croquet said, brushing sandwich crumbs from his mustache. "But I'd assume that he's making preparations for picking them up tomorrow."

"Tomorrow," Roland said, gratefully sipping his steaming cup of black coffee. "Back to business."

"The return of the status quo ante," Croquet said.

They both sat in silence for a moment, savoring their last day of freedom as the sun began to set, turning the placid blue infinity pool to black ink.

"I can't believe I'm looking forward to going back to work," Roland confessed. "Is it crazy, that I've started to miss it? All the running around trying to keep up with all his demands?"

"No, I feel the same," Croquet said. "It's gratifying to do something useful. To know you're necessary, even if it's not appreciated."

"Well, we'll be back to that same old same old tomorrow."

"I wouldn't be so sure of that," a familiar, arrogant voice countered from the patio.

"Kaiba-sama!" Roland, startled and still less than half-sober despite sandwiches and coffee, fell out of his lounge chair. His cell phone skittered across the deck and into the pool.

Croquet, much more sober, quickly stood. He was unable to stop himself from glancing guiltily at the empty drink pineapples under Roland's chair.

"You've been enjoying the libations, I see," Pegasus said sternly, folding his arms.

"Ah, well – " Croquet rapidly reached speechless incoherence.

Meanwhile, Roland, distraught, had escaped from his overturned lounge chair and jumped into the pool, diving to look for his phone.

"Roland!" Kaiba said furiously when he surfaced for the third time. "Get out of there!"

Chastised, a dripping Roland climbed out, hanging his head like a whipped dog and shuffling to Kaiba as if expecting to be hit with a newspaper. "Forgive me, Kaiba-sama."

"It's just a phone," Kaiba said gruffly. "Easily replaced."

"He's bleeding," Pegasus said, pointing to the pinkish rivulet squiggling down from Roland's elbow.

Kaiba pulled out his cell phone. "Call a – "

"There's a first aid kit on the bottom shelf of the bar," Croquet offered.

Pegasus went to the bar, rummaged the small box out, and then tossed it to Kaiba.

Kaiba, who at first handed the kit to Roland as if expecting him bandage himself, noticed Pegasus' smirk. "Hold the box," he said to Roland, then opened it and took out an alcohol wipe and a packet of gauze. As Roland stared in amazement Kaiba explained sternly, "Mokuba had frequent minor injuries when he was young. Because of that I learned proper treatment of wounds."

"I heard my name," Mokuba said as he stepped onto the patio. He stopped and goggled at the sight of his brother tending to Roland's elbow. "What the – ?"

"Never underestimate the power of competitive altruism," Pegasus murmured to him.

"Hey, big brother," Mokuba said.

"Hn." Kaiba turned from the stunned and blushing Roland. "I've waited long enough. Tell me how you've been tracking us."

"Tracking?" Pegasus asked, raising an eyebrow.

"You didn't think it was odd that he met us in Kodiak?" Kaiba asked him.

"It's where we flew to when we started. I assumed he'd just been waiting there."

Kaiba sighed noisily, as if trying to be patient. "Not for two – never mind." He turned to Mokuba. "Well? You said you couldn't answer in the plane because it was too loud. Is it now too quiet?"

"Nah." Mokuba clearly relished knowing something that his big brother did not. "When I saw this morning that you were on the move but hadn't called me, I figured that maybe you wanted your return to be a surprise. I was gonna hang back, until I heard some guys talking about a 'white-haired pirate' trying to buy 'no-questions asked' transportation from Kodiak to San Francisco. I figured you'd need help once you ran out of local options."

Kaiba eyed Pegasus. "For once your distinctiveness is an asset. Still, I suppose it is gratifying to know that someone with cash but no identification can't purchase a commercial airline ticket."

"Speaking of that," Mokuba said, hefting the small duffel he carried, "I grabbed the bag with your credit cards and cell phones and checkbooks. And your clothes, if you want to change."

"Oh, thank goodness," Pegasus said, reaching for the bag. "I've decided I hate wool and polyester equally. I can't wait to wear cotton and silk again."

"Perhaps later," Kaiba said, cutting Pegasus off from the bag. "You're not going to distract me so easily, Mokuba. You explained why you met us in Kodiak, but not how you pinpointed our location. We had neither cell phone nor transmitters. Have the KaibaCorp surveillance satellites been scanning for us?"

"Nope," Mokuba said. "But before I tell you, I'd like to know how long it took you to figure out that I was tracking you. And after that, you have to promise to tell me what happened on the fish boat, and what you were doing out in those woods last week – there isn't a town anywhere where near where you were."

"While those tales are spun," Pegasus said, "I think many tall glasses of refreshing, non-alcoholic beverages will be required." When he saw Croquet begin to move, he held up a hand. "Sit down, Croquet, I'll get this round. After all, I do know my way around a bar. Both sides of it."

"He does," Kaiba said, then said to Mokuba, "I knew it once The Faespun was sent to pick us up."

Pegasus gasped. "Sent? Really?"

"Of course," Kaiba said condescendingly. "Wasn't it obvious? You didn't think that 'coming across' our small boat in the middle of that zero-traffic area was too improbable for chance? What I don't know," he narrowed his eyes at Mokuba, "is how you pinpointed us without the transmitters." He stopped, frowning. "In fact, given the distances and currents involved, The Faespun must have set out shortly after we were put off The Stygian. I assume you were monitoring us from the Aleutians?"

Mokuba nodded.

"Did my transmitter signal get through after all? Or was there something in our clothing?"

"Yes and no and not exactly," Mokuba said, following Pegasus as he carried a tray with a pitcher and five glasses to the poolside table. Mokuba sat down, folding his arms behind his head, waiting until everyone else had taken their drinks and seated themselves before he continued.

"Now, don't get mad," Mokuba said, "but when Doctor Boscardi did the surgery on your shoulder he put a – "

"You had surgery?" Pegasus asked Kaiba, frowning with concern. "When was that? If I'd known about it I could have sent flowers. How did you get hurt?"

Kaiba looked at him sourly. "It was a trivial procedure. Debridement of the supraspinatus to remove frayed muscle fibers." He turned back to Mokuba. "A chip? I suspected as much at the time. Good thing I didn't have to go through standard airport security."

"Wouldn't have been a problem," Mokuba said. "It's tiny and non-metallic."

"Kaiba-boy, you're chipped?"

"Hn." Kaiba, an avid glint in his eye, was ignoring Pegasus. "What powers it? To send even a weak signal that far takes power."

"Experimental porous organic mesh battery," Mokuba said, matching his energy. "Uses the salinity of lymph – "

"Can we finish the rescue story first?" Pegasus asked. "Before the science talk takes over?"

"Oh, sure," Mokuba said sheepishly.

"Experimental?" Kaiba snuck in a last question before the subject changed. "Our patent?"

"Of course," Mokuba said.

"Please?" Pegasus pleaded.

"Sorry. Anyhow, yes, I had you chipped. Probably should have asked first, but we both figured you'd say no."

"We who?" Kaiba demanded, then caught the look that passed between Mokuba and Roland. "I see. So you had me tagged like a dog and never told me."

"If it makes any difference, I had myself done at the same time," Mokuba said with a grin. "I got that idea that year when I was kidnapped like, six times: Jounouchi said I needed a Lo-Jack. I've thought about that ever since." His expression became serious and he said, "And hey, if anyone ever takes you again, I want to be able to find you. Fast."

"Hn."

"Oh!" Pegasus said suddenly. "How ironic that you told Ted that I was chipped! I thought at the time you were quite clever and brave to make up that story to stop them from killing me."

Kaiba didn't say anything so Mokuba continued. "When the signal from the transmitters went one way, and the signal from your shoulder chip went the other … "

"Wait, Kaiba-boy has a chip in his shoulder?" Pegasus chuckled. "That's priceless."

" … way," Mokuba said, fighting laughter, "I knew something was wrong. So I sent Captain Nan out." The grin disappeared. "You have no idea how happy I was when she didn't radio me."

"Why?"

"Because she was only to radio if she didn't find anything at the specified location. To tell us to send out the dive teams. To look for your body." Mokuba's face pinched up suddenly, and he looked down.

"The Bear Rug," Pegasus said brightly. "Was that also part of the master plan?"

"The bare rug?" Mokuba said with a small sniffle, raising his head. "Captain Nan didn't say anything about a rug."

"Ah well, it's not important," Pegasus said soothingly.

Mokuba asked, "Okay, so that's my story. Now spill – what did you do after she brought you back to land? You obviously made enough in a week to have enough cash to buy flights back."

"Do you know how to contact Captain Nan?" Pegasus asked, once again to diverting the subject. "I'd like to keep in touch with her." At Kaiba's derisive snort, he added haughtily, "It's reasonable to feel a special bond with someone's who's saved your life."

"She's not interested in dating you," Kaiba said. "She called you dainty, remember?"

"Yes, and I also remember what she said about you. She indicated that she considered a rabid pit bull to be more cuddly."

"Your point?"

Mokuba punched a button on his cell phone. "Hello… This is Kaiba Mokuba… Yes, they did." He glanced up at Pegasus, who brightened. "He did? That's great! Yes, he's here now, do you want to talk to him?" He listened for a moment longer, nodded, then said, "I think so." He held the phone out to Pegasus.

"Is it really her?" Pegasus asked as he took the phone. "Hello, my dear," he said in his creamiest, most charming voice. "It's delightful to hear from you." As he listened, his face went from smug to surprised to delighted. "Absolutely! Shall I give you my address in San Francisco now? Oh, of course… You too! Goodbye."

"So she's planning to visit?" Kaiba asked.

"Yes," Pegasus replied with dignity. "She'll be swinging by at the end of – her honeymoon!" He gave a small-but-heartfelt fist-pump.

"Honeymoon?" Kaiba was confused. "A wedding honeymoon?"

Pegasus stood. "Hold up your glasses, everyone, and let them be re-filled so that all we can toast the impending nuptials of – the two Captains!"

When glasses had been refilled Pegasus held his aloft and said, "A toast to Romance, and the power of the Romance Novel! To Love, and Justice!"

He then explained. His plot to get the two romance novel-loving Captains together had worked out better than he'd anticipated. Once Captain Lloyd heard Nan's information about the fate of "Paris and Kino" he'd whisked her off to the police, where warrants were quickly issued for Ted and Ski Mask. Ski Mask had been picked up within hours, boarding a new ship: he had immediately asked for immunity or a lessening of the drug-smuggling and attempted murder charges in exchange for testifying against Ted. He had also volunteered information about the fate of several missing scientific teams – one of which had included Nan's missing friend.

Nan was so grateful to finally have closure that she offered to buy Lloyd dinner. The two had hit it off – one bonding point being, as Pegasus had hoped, their mutual guilty pleasure of trashy melodrama. Things had progressed quickly: when Lloyd had proposed, Nan had, as she put it, "said yes to the big, fiery, hairy, loosome eejit."

At the end of this story, even Kaiba was seen to have a faint smile.

"So… " Mokuba said, "at the risk of stomping on the warm glow, I gotta know – who won the bet?"

"Oh, that's right," Pegasus said. "The bet."

He and Kaiba both reached for the duffel bag at the same time.

"What are you doing?" they asked in unison.

"Getting my checkbook," each replied.

After everyone was done being surprised, both Pegasus and Kaiba wrote out checks.

"Before I give this to you," Kaiba said to Croquet in his I Am Now Making a Pronouncement voice, "I will tell you that you don't know your employer half as well as you think you do."

"I ate scrambled eggs. And ribs with barbeque sauce," Pegasus added. "Just like a regular guy."

Kaiba jabbed the check at an amazed Croquet.

"I mirror what Kaiba-boy said," Pegasus said, as with a flourish he tore out the check he'd written and held it out to Roland. "Though he loves his toys, he's not a machine."

Kaiba scowled.

As a disbelieving Roland took the check, Pegasus bowed deeply. "Now," he said. "I hope you won't mind if I abandon you, but I'm going to take a long, hot, bubble bath. Or perhaps a shower followed by a bath. At any rate, I'm sure I'll be in there for hours."

Croquet started to get up. "Do you need me to prepare ... " he started to say.

"No," Pegasus said with a wave of his hand. "You're still on vacation as far as I'm concerned. At least for today. Stay there, drink your drink. I know how to draw a bath, and I've already got a book to read."

"I suppose we should be going then," Mokuba said to Pegasus.

Pegasus nodded. "I wish I could seduce you and your brother into staying ... overnight," he said suggestively. "But I know how eager he is to escape my clutches and get back to Japan and his beloved KaibaCorp computers. There probably are a dozen disasters that need his loving attention more than I do."

"I'm sure Mokuba and Roland have taken good care of everything in my absence," Kaiba said dismissively, rummaging in the duffel for his coat. "But I do prefer to be in familiar surroundings."

"I could surround you with something familiar," Pegasus said with a wink.

Roland sputtered.

"Goodbye Mister Paris," Kaiba said, removing Pegasus' clothes and jewelry from the duffel and dropping them on an empty chair. "Enjoy your bubble bath. Since you're the creative genius, figure out how to explain your deception to Roslyn. She's likely to be at the wedding ceremony."

"Oh," Pegasus said faintly. "I hadn't thought of that."

"Of course you didn't." Kaiba briefly raised a hand in farewell, then began to walk toward the patio. "Let's go!" he said, and Roland hurried after.

"Did something happen?" Mokuba asked once they were inside and out of earshot. "You seem different."

"No," Kaiba said firmly. "It's only that I now understand why he says and does such annoying things. Since he considers an angry reaction from me to be a win, if I don't react, I win."

They made their way through the mansion, across the foyer and out the grand entranceway, to the Blue Eyes hover-jet parked on Pegasus' front lawn.

"What do you want to start with when we get home?" Mokuba asked. "Roland got all the weekly status reports printed out and prioritized your emails."

"Good," Kaiba said, starting the engines. "but first we're going to go to Mutou's shop and pick up a some cards. Spell Absorption, De-Spell, Spell-binding Circle…"

"Why?" Mokuba asked. "Are you planning to start dueling professionally again?"

"No," Kaiba said as the jet flapped its wings and lifted off the grass. "I was thinking of putting together a deck in case there's ever an opportunity to duel with friends."

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~ The end ~

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Author's Notes: At last, the final chapter!

I am very grateful to Dark Rabbit for being such a fantastic (i.e., responsive and articulate) beta for this story. Thanks also to Shirgane777 for inadvertently giving me the idea for the resolution concerning Captain Lloyd. ~ More author's notes will be posted at my LiveJournal and DreamWidth (links in my profile).

I hope you all have enjoyed reading as much as I've enjoyed writing.

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(05) 19 Aug 2011 ~ Minor edits to close a few small holes.