My Love

Chapter 1: My Partner

My love, leave yourself behind

"Good morning, Detective," Castle smiles lightly as he hands her a cup of coffee. Montgomery had forced the entire team to take a few days off after the events of her mother's case, and they were just now coming back to work.

"Hey, Castle," she sighs, taking a sip of coffee.

He sits down in his chair by her desk, "No bodies yet?"

"Nope."

"And you're… doing okay?" he has to ask even though he knows that she will probably not be truthful.

"It's still hard. I thought I had put it all behind me, but reopening the case has made those wounds surface again. Sometimes I wonder if it would just be easier to let it all go, to not care who's behind it."

"If you want to find these guys, Kate, I'll be right next to you. We'll find them and put them behind bars. If you just want to let it all go… then we will."

Beckett sets her coffee down and leans back in her chair, "I can't, Castle. She dedicated her life to finding the truth, and… I have to do this for her."

"Okay," he reaches for her hand. "We will. I mean, if you want me to be here to help you…"

"Yes, I need you here, Rick," she bites her lip, somewhat regretting her words after having said them.

"Then I'm not going anywhere."

"Thank you. You're a great friend."

"It's no problem, Kate."

Before she can reply, her cell phone rings. She doesn't recognize the number. "Beckett," she answers, glancing at Castle as he drinks his coffee.

"Kate? It's Martha, Richard's mother. Is Richard around?"

"Yeah," she starts, about to ask if she needs to talk to him, but the older woman cuts her off.

"I wanted to talk to you. In private, if you can. Or at least away from Richard," Martha says.

"I'll be back in a minute, Castle," the detective tells him before heading to the break room. "Is everything okay, Martha?"

"Oh, we're fine. It's just… Alexis and I want to talk to you, Kate."

"Okay…" she says, not sure what they could possibly want to say to her.

"Can you meet us during your lunch break?"

"As long as a case doesn't come in, I can be there."

"Would twelve-thirty be okay? How about that little Italian place around the corner from the precinct?"

"That should be fine."

"And you won't tell Richard about this? Or let him come with you?" Martha asks somewhat nervously.

"No, he can have lunch with Ryan and Esposito today."

"Thank you, Kate. We really appreciate this."

"I'll see you in a couple hours then," Kate hangs up and heads back into the bull pen.

The writer looks up at her, "I take it that wasn't a case?"

"No."

"Dr. Motorcycle Boy?"

"He doesn't come back from Africa for another week."

"Oh… who then?"

"It doesn't matter."

"Yes, it does," he prods, trying to get her to break. Suddenly it hits him, "It was someone with more information for you. Information about your mother."

"No. I have a feeling the only way I'm going to be contacted by any of these other conspirators is if they try to kill me. So you really have nothing to worry about."

"Nothing to worry about?" Castle practically shouts. Everyone's head turns towards them. He lowers his voice when he continues, "If they want to kill you, then I should be worried."

"I don't know that they want to kill me. But it's possible. Lockwood or whoever he is did before we caught him. I'm sure his boss probably wants me dead before I can get to him. But it wasn't anyone that you need to worry about," she tries to assure him, somewhat surprised by his outburst of emotion.

"Just tell me who it is. Please. I'd feel much better," he tries to give her the puppy dog eyes. They don't work. "Come on, Kate."

"No. I'm going out to lunch with them, Castle, and I promise you that I will shoot you if you even think about following me."

"Are you cheating on Josh?" he frowns at her.

"No."

"Because you said they and that would be totally -"

She makes a grab for his ear, but he jumps back just in time, "Castle."

"Okay, no affair. Are you completely sure they are safe? Because I've proven to be surprisingly helpful in life or death situations."

"You know them better than I do, Rick. And I'm sure you'd feel kind of insulted if I said they were dangerous."

"Hm… can't be fans then. They can be pretty dangerous. And you hate reporters. I don't see why Paula or Gina would want to meet with you… unless they're trying to get you to make me quit following you so I write more. Mother and Alexis… no idea what they would want to talk to you for, but they both said they had plans… My writer poker buddies might want to meet you so that they can steal my muse…" he trails off when he notices her glare.

"What did I tell you about calling me your muse?"

"That… I shouldn't?" She continues to glare, which makes him uncomfortable. "I'm sorry. Please don't hurt me. Just remember that you said I was a good friend ten minutes ago."

"You're off the hook this time, Castle, but I swear you are going to pay if you do it again."

He smiles his thanks, "I'd promise you that it wouldn't happen again, but I don't want to break my promise."

She rolls her eyes and shakes her head at him. "I have paperwork to get done. You don't have to stay here if you have writing to do. I'll call you if we catch a case."

"I like it here."

"Okay… but I don't want to hear any complaints when Gina and Paula start yelling at you for not having the next book done."

"The book will get done. And without me going to the Hamptons for the summer," he assures her. They had never really discussed the previous summer, but he knew that his departure had affected her even though she would never admit it.

"I'm not going to get mad at you for going to the Hamptons, Castle. Just call this time."

"Alexis and I will probably go this summer. But only for a week or two. You're welcome to come if you'd like. Dr. Motorcycle Boy can even come."

"Josh will not be going to the Hamptons."

"You want me to have you all to myself?" he smirks.

Another glare is directed at him. "Castle…"

"So why won't he come? Too busy with work? Or is he leaving you for Africa again?" he says somewhat spitefully.

Beckett glances at him, "Actually he doesn't really like you."

"Why? What's not to like about a rugged handsome mystery novelist?" he grins at her.

"I don't know, Castle. Maybe because you've written sex scenes about his girlfriend in your books."

"They're not real."

"But it obviously means you think about me that way."

"Not you, Kate. Nikki."

"Same thing."

"No," he frowns. "You and Nikki aren't the same."

She ignores him, "Plus I spend way more time with you than I do with him."

"Do you want me to back off, Kate? Because if it's what you want, I will."

She's taken aback by the seriousness in his eyes. "No," she says almost without thinking. "I mean… you're my partner, and Josh is going to have to deal with that."

Castle gives her a soft smile, which she returns after a moment of hesitation.

A/N: First, the song belongs to Sia. It's in Eclipse and I thought it was really pretty so I decided to use it. Not sure how crazy I am about the lyrics though. Anyway, this story will be 30 chapters I believe. I've only got like 23 written right now. Now sure how often I'll be updating. Maybe every three days. I kind of wanted to have it done before the finale but I don't think that will happen. So... hope you enjoyed it and please let me know your thoughts. Thanks.