I wrote this while writing Extracted just to get it out of my head. Some of you may remember the chapter that dealt with this possiblity. Anyway. I just found it on my zip drive and was feeling daring.. Hope some of you enjoy!

Lori

...

"Sam?" The person on the other end of the phone spoke softly.

He rubbed his eyes and looked at the alarm clock. It was three am. This couldn't be good.

"What's wrong, Fi?" He asked somewhat urgently.

"We need you to come by the loft." Her voice had a strange edge. He recognized it, but couldn't quite place it. "You should bring your medical supplies."

"Everybody okay?" Axe yelped, jumping out of bed and yanking on his pants.

"Um.. Yes?" She grunted uncomfortably. "Just bring the bag."

"On my way Fi."

…...

Fiona gave Michael a quick glance before opening the door.

"What happened?" Sam asked quickly, dropping his bag on the floor and giving them both a once over.

"You know how we switched Scotch glasses at the meeting?" She smiled smugly.

"Yeah so we could get the sedative in the guy. Told you, worked like a charm. I got everything I needed to from his place while he and his special lady snored away." He shook his head.

"It would have been charming if Michael hadn't drank the other glass of scotch." She turned her tight lips back to where her boyfriend sat grimacing on the bed.

"So?"

"So apparently, Enrique's special lady shares our love for armature bar tending." She snapped.

"She slipped him a mickey?" Fiona nodded and Michael's head bobbed down to stare at the pillow he had across his knees. "Something serious?"

"Define serious." Michael grunted.

"Guys why am I here?" Sam looked between his friends. Fiona crossed her arms and looked at her boyfriend.

Westen sighed, lifting the pillow to reveal his tented boxers.

"Oh my-." Sam leaped back in surprise before running his hands over his face. "She slipped him a little blue pill?" He guessed, one hand still over his mouth.

"Apparently." Fiona released one arm, flinging it towards Michael. "She was going on and on in the ladies room about how she was going to finally get some tonight. I should have picked up on it!"

Fi stopped with a huff, rubbing her forehead.

"Well.. so we have a little problem." Sam tried to lighten the mood.

"There's nothing little about it." Fiona snorted, Michael winced.

"And you two tried to.. take care of this on your own?" Sam moved his free hand in a circular motion. His friends stared at him blankly. "Okay. I'm guessing you tried ice?"

Michael moaned, flopping back on to the bed, moaning in pain when he made contact. Fiona winced, Sam grit his teeth and looked away.

"You really think we just called you right away?" Fiona's voice was a little frantic. "It's been three hours and-." Sam made an involuntary gagging noise when she announced the time frame. Covering his mouth again and peering at the pole like form in Michael's undergarments. "-despite his game face? He's in a lot of pain."

"You tried.." Sam began again giving her a little nod.

"I can't even touch it with out bringing him to tears!" She yelled.

"Focus!" Michael yelled, before covering his face with the other pillow and gesturing to his problem. Both of them stared wide eyed at the evidence for a second.

"I'm not really sure what therapeutic protocol is for this sort of situation." Sam sputtered, wincing as he tried to pull his eyes away.

"I googled it. Needle aspiration and saline injections." Fiona said attempting to sound sure of herself. "About every five minutes for up to an hour."

"Needle.. for an.." Sam looked back at Michael's penis and gulped.

"You have lidocaine in there right?" She bit her lip and Michael punched the side of the bed a few times and groaned from beneath his pillow.

"Uh.. yeah.." Axe looked vaguely pale.

"Show me.." She motioned towards the Google page still pulled up on the screen and swallowed. "Show me where and watch me to make sure I do okay.." She took a deep breath to steady herself. "And I'll.. um.. do the actual.. needling."

"You sure?" Sam asked painfully.

"Well we have to do something or it's going to cause permanent damage. And I'd say I have the most to loose in that situation so.." She rubbed her face before clapping her hands together. Michael jumped before yelping in pain. "..lets get to it."

…...

"Michael?" He could feel her hand stroking his face. He let his eyes open slowly. "Hi."

"Hi." He answered flatly.

"How you feeling?" She asked him with a little too much concern.

"I passed out?" He guessed, not quite remembering his last conscious moments. Just flashes of light and the sound of his own yells.

"About half way through." She nodded, squeezing his hand.

"You're done now?" He whimpered.

"Mmhum.." She kissed his brow before handing him a handful of pills and a glass of water. He took them with out much thought. "All done." He relaxed back against the bed. "I gave you two muscle relaxers and a Percoset." She proclaimed, kissing his cheek and pulling away. "I'm going to tell Sam he can go."

"Where is he?" Michael asked, his tone fairly humiliated.

"Sitting in his car. I was pretty sure he was going to pass out too." He listened to her on the stairs then relaxed a little when he heard Sam's car start and drive away. He counted the number of seconds it took Fi to lock the gate before sitting half way up and lifting the ice pack and towel away to examine his member. He decided it looked as humbled as he felt.

"Hey hey. Put that back." Fiona scolded, carefully lowering the ice back down. "I took great care in making sure it was all put back together safely."

She stretched out beside him on the bed and he covered his face.

"Oh stop acting so bashful. I've handled the body part in question more times than I can count." She teased. He moved an arm to glower at her. "If we're being realistic it's really more my penis then your penis."

She grinned at him and he couldn't help but laugh. Maybe it was the drugs. She grinned wider, leaning forward and pressing her lips to his.

"You should have seen Sam's face." She giggled. Michael snorted in an attempt not to join her.

"It's not a funny story." He whined trying not to smile.

"It had a happy ending." She managed to squeak out before they both busted out laughing.

…...

Across town, Sam Axe flipped the lid of his toilet seat open and poured out his quiet old and rarely necessary pill bottle. He watched the little blue diamonds splash into the water with a sigh of relief before flushing them down with out much after thought.