Author's note:

Thanks guys for the faves/alerts and reviews!

First off I want to apologize about not posting anything for a long time.

For those of you that wished me luck and or prayed, I just want to say thank you very much!

I quit Carl's Jr. and got promoted at Gamestop! Now I'm working extra hard towards getting promoted again, this time for actual keys and the ability to close and whatnot. of course the higher pay is great too. haha.

Sorry for the lack of updates, i have had at least more than half of this chapter written. I just honestly hadn't been in a mood to transfer it from paper to computer. Sorry! I'm going to get back into the habit of writing so all my stories get an update like they need.

Also, to the reviewers. Don't worry. When I say slow building, I mean it this time. No matter how much they tell me they're ready to get a rolling, I won't listen. Sorry Dean and Cas, but no means no. They will have random moments, but you know Dean. He goes hand and hand with denial.

So let's see how long I can keep the two apart from anything romantic. lol.

CHAPTER TWO

"Flying home"

"Nothing can bring a real sense of security into the home except true love."

~ Billy Graham

"Your doing what!"

"I have to move to New york for a little while." Dean tried to make it sound as if it wasn't that big of a deal.

"To do what exactly?"

"I can't really tell you... except that I'll be with someone."

"You'll BE with someone? Who? Who is so important that you have to leave me here all alone for God knows how long?"

"I can't tel-"

"Here we go again with the 'I can't tell you'. You can Dean, you just don't want to! I don't see why either, It's not like I'm going to go blabbing everything you say to Mrs. Daniels. Is it a woman?"

"What?.. No."

"Your lying aren't you? I bet she's some prostitute that witnessed some crime go down and you have to stay with her. Hope it feels good when you screw her. Just go Dean. I'm tired and Ben's going to be coming from his friend's house soon. I want you gone before he comes back. "

Dean shook his head, muttering to himself about how crazy she was being. She was truly being unreasonable. Jealous. He'd bet a million dollars that Jo would say. 'It's funny but when the other person in a relationship starts randomly always accusing you of cheating on them. It's usually themselves that's doing the cheating. Reverse psychology that comes naturally. It's human nature to lie and then point the finger at someone else and claim that they are responsible for whatever else the other person is doing."

Running away never fixed anything especially if he wanted things to work. Lisa was being more difficult than usual. It wasn't fair and it seemed to make everything harder. But if it all came too easy, would if be worth fighting for? Dean told himself to calm down and then he approached Lisa. She looked pissed all to hell, but Dean shot her a pleading look.

"Yes?" Lisa questioned, her eyes filled with scorn.

"Can you let me explain? you know I'm not allowed to tell you certain details about my work. But I'll tell you something because I love and trust you, okay baby?" She looked calmer and nodded towards him.

"I'm going to be protecting an eyewitness and he witnessed something horrible happen to his own sister." Dean put a strong emphasis on he. Because let's be honest, Dean was straight and currently with his high school sweet heart. He wasn't going anywhere as far as he knew.

"Oh, I'm so sorry Dean, I... just... I just get so worried and well jealous that some stranger gets you all for themselves all day and I hardly see you anymore... We just never seem to have time together anymore."

"I know...well, you know, I do happen to have time..."

"Think you have enough time for that?..." Lisa smiled, leaning into him, loving the warmth he provided for her.

"I don't have to be at his place until eleven." They shared a smile and walked towards their bedroom. "I'll tell Ben he can spend the night at his friend's house."

"Sounds good."

To anyone who didn't know him probably thought he was robotic or simply a sociopath since to the police it appeared that he was unaffected by what happened. The fact that he seemed to be without emotion and was reportedly apathetic.. that was not the case. Castiel was just one of those people that were so well put together.. so capable of compartmentalizing their brain so that if he needed to focus on something else, he could and achieve whatever he set out to do.

He had been strong and held on just until he hung up the phone with Dean. Afterwords he allowed the dam to burst, all the emotion he had tried so hard to contain came spilling through and crashing down on him. Tears streamed down his face freely, sobs so sever raked his body, making it ache. He was heartbroken and he felt like he could just asphyxiate, he couldn't breathe. He was choking on his spit. He forced himself to relax enough to let the oxygen burn through his lungs.

He would get justice for his sister.

He hated that he was so very alone.

He couldn't turn to his sister anymore now that she had been ripped away from him. Couldn't turn to his mother who he had never came to know. Couldn't turn to his father since he didn't know where he went. No matter how hard he had searched for him, he had came back empty handed. No one was there to tell him everything was going to be okay, even though he knew it wasn't. But just to hear those words, just to reassure him and make him relax and believe them... there was no one.

Now that he had lost his sister, she had been his only life raft in the world.

But now came the important question. Would he have the will power and stay afloat all by himself? Would he just give up and sink? Or would someone come and save him from drowning and be his lifeguard?

Once he had managed to pull himself back together, he went into her room and glanced around, he needed something.

He looked into her jewelery box, betting he'd find it there. She hadn't been wearing it that night. It was a locket that had wings on both sides and was engraved with the single word. 'Angel' on it. He opened the locket and an old picture of his mother and his sister at the age of six greeted him. His sister had been six years older than him, though everyone had always thought he was the older sibling since she looked so young, so vibrate and full of life.

He shuddered a sigh and placed the thin silver chain around his neck, letting the locket fall loosely around his chest. He smiled, he would always have something to remember her by. He left the room and went to his to pack. It was going to be a long night.

They were flying and Castiel could feel the very fear and stress rolling off of Dean in waves. It was concerning. Castiel was going to break the silence. Ask a question and attempt to distract Dean from the fact that they were having mild turbulence. Seeing Dean grip the armrest so hard his knuckles turned white was the final straw. But it seemed Dean had something to share.

"So I kind of reconciled with Lisa after she calmed down and stopped jumping to conclusions."

"Oh? I take it coitus took effect?"

"Yeah actually."

"I do not, how do they put it... 'mean to rain on your parade' but you know that doesn't actually fix anything?..."

"Yeah... I know.. Sex never fixes anything. It just gets you to shut up and avoid talking about the problem. I just wanted her to be happy or something close to that when I left instead of feeling bitter and alone...ya know?"

"Yes, I believe I understand. My sister used to come and divulge what she needed to say and would ask for my advice despite how unskilled I seem to be in the relationship department."

"You know, it's not you right?"

"I beg your pardon?.."

"You seem like an awesome guy though your brain is intimidating as hell, I honestly don't and can't begin to understand how people seemed to take what you have to give for granted and throw it all away."

"I am glad someone else say those things. Sometimes, I think if I perhaps lowered my standards or intentions, these things will not occur."

"Don't you dare."

Castiel looked at Dean in shock and clearly was confused because he tilted his head to the side and resembled a bird.

"Never settle for anything less than what you deserve. Your the type of person that deserves the best, especially don't dumb yourself down or change what you want because certain people fail to understand what you expect in a relationship."

"Thank you."

"No problem, what I'm here for. That and to keep the bad men away."

"You must realize your job and what you do is incredible, correct?"

"Yeah, I like saving lives and helping people. Sometimes I don't think I'm good enough at what I do though." Dean couldn't believe he had just spoke those words out into the air. All his worries of not being good enough, made clear to a stranger no less. He hadn't even mentioned this to his brother.

Not even to his baby brother...the one who he was closest to than any other living being on this earth. Maybe that was why... Dean wasn't ever going to see his case after the trial. Like every other person he had protected and ensured that they were indeed safe, he left. Left them to their own life, left them so that they could move on and he could go back to Lisa and then helping the next unlucky bastard that was in the wrong place at the wrong time. So it didn't matter speaking his worries someone he would never see again, right?...

Regardless, just to let all his insecurities show was a big step for Dean. He felt weak even just having those thoughts. Let alone thinking about letting Sam know such things. He needed to be the big brother, needed to show how strong he was. Needed to show that he had no weakness. But thinking he wasn't good enough... That was only half of it.

The rest was thinking that a man as broken as himself shouldn't be in his position. Saving people?.. But someone would need him one day, to either catch that bullet meant for them..to show them a new way of living while he protected them. He was so broken and yet so self-sacrificing, he didn't even blink at the idea of dying for someone one day.

"It's something much more than just not being good enough, isn't it? You don't have to tell me, but know this Dean Winchester. Good things do happen and I believe you are here for a reason. I believe that your here for something much more than just being here protecting me. God chose you, your the only one who can help me. Help others. Your a righteous man." Castiel spoke with such sincerity, Dean swallowed roughly, feeling he'd disappoint the man sitting next to him by denying those words that made him feel so much more of a better person than what he was. But he had to say something.

"What, you think you can save me?"

Though Dean had meant it as a joke, even added his shit eating grin he threw to cover up how he was really feeling. Though he felt it slip completely off his face once he heard Castiel speak once more.

"I can try." Dean couldn't fake it in front of this man that seemed to be able to read him so clearly.

Castiel had added those words lightly, but he meant it. He would do it, save Dean. It was the least he could do since Dean was doing so much for him. He'd show Dean that he was worthy, show him he was amazing even if he didn't see it just yet.

Please Read and Review! I'm hoping to get into the habit of updating all my stories regularly. Trying to get back into writing since I was just gaming the last couple of days to take off the stress of work. So now i'm using writing as an outlet for you guys!

I'm also looking forwards to expanding beyond Supernatural and start writing some slash for Star Trek, one of my favorite movies so far.