AN: This one has been playing in my head for a while but I didn't want to broach it. Unfortunately it's running interference with all my other work fanfic and other! So here it is... Personally I hate the concept. Probably not for the fluffy Jack/Sam fans but reality sometimes bites and this one bit hard.

Summary: What happens when Jack's worst nightmare almost repeats itself? Disturbing fic. Jack/Sam Established with family. Rated T with one hefty curse word. Angst/Family.

WARNING:- ONE CURSE WORD. PROBABLY NOT BEST SUITED TO YOUNGER T READERS BUT DEF NOT M.

WHEN NIGHTMARES COME

Jack's heart actually stopped beating. Everything slowed down and he saw his whole world fall apart. Slowly, before he even realised it a deep painful horror tore everything from his life apart from the tunnel-vision. "Kyyyy-llll-eee!" he yelled. The driveway extended almost into infinity before him, his destination seeming further away with every wide uncontrolled frantic step he took towards it.

Suddenly and inexplicably he was there grabbing his six year old son by the arm and dragging him out of the front seat of the car. The kid was bawling but he didn't care, he had to get him away from it, away from the danger. Something dark and heavy skittered from his son's hands and disappeared under the chassis of the dark blue Hi-Lux that Sam owned.

Kyle was screaming in terror, his fragile skin bruising under his father's vice-like grip. Jack didn't give the boy time to get his feet under him as he swung him around, scraping his knees of the flagstones and forcing him to the ground. He wrapped himself bodily around the boy's small frame and held him tight, almost smothering him.

Silence descended as everything regained a sense of normality, Jack's distorted mind coming back to itself. His beloved little son was sobbing underneath him, scared out off his mind, hurt by his own hand but all Jack felt was relief. "Kyle baby are you alright, let me see you, please, please." He scrambled up and pulled him to his feet. The adrenaline in his system meant he was still being a little rougher than he should be but it was better than the alternative, oh god by how much was it better? The boy couldn't support his own weight and fell against his father. Jack held him as tight as he could and repeatedly kissed his forehead, his temple and his crown of fair locks. "My god Kyle I love you, don't ever do that to me again." Two wide blue eyes, so much like his mother's, looked up at him.

The child's frightened features broke into a terrible sadness. "Daddy what did I do?" he couldn't understand. Once again he buried his head as giant sobs stole over his tiny frame.

"Nothing son, you did nothing. Shhh, quiet down, please. I'm sorry I hurt you. Let me see, are you bleeding?" Jack felt the first blossom of guilt shimmer below his relief.

Kyle let out a few more ragged sobs and whimpered over his grazed knee. Jack covered the whole of his son's hurt with a single tender hand. "You hurt my arm too daddy." he wailed rubbing the angry mark above his wrist.

"I'm so sorry kiddo. Let me kiss it better."

The child was hesitant, obviously confused as to why his own father would hurt him. "Why did you do that Daddy?" he asked in heightened tones, fresh tears running down his puffy cheeks.

Jack buried his own head in the child's neck. "Daddy didn't mean to frighten you Kyle but that thing you had, that thing in mommy's car was very dangerous and daddy was scared you might hurt yourself with it." He pulled him close again. "So scared." he whispered to himself behind closed eyes. He let out a ragged sigh and fought to regain complete control but images from the past were tearing him apart. He looked towards the house, turning his eye away from the car and the echoes of fate, he was wholly thankful that this time he had gotten to his son before it was too late.

Just as his eye focussed on the swing door that needed painted Sam appeared out onto the front porch to see what all the fuss was about. She was wearing a pale blue cotton summer dress and Jack could just make out the swell of their third child showing through the thin fabric. His blood ran to ice and he felt his back stiffen. Already he was trying hard to keep the lid on the catastrophic explosion that was building within him. Never again would he trust the woman before him. He buried the flurry of hate for his son's sake. There would be time later to deal with Sam Carter. Right now he needed to get his children to safety. "Where is Lillian?"

"Lily? She's inside. What's going on Jack?"

"Wait here." he told his son. "Don't move, stay right here, daddy will be right back I promise." Kyle reluctantly let go of his grip round his father's neck his eyes full of trust. It seemed Jack was already forgiven for frightening one of the most precious things in his life. He wiped a tear from his boy's face, kissed him and headed for the house.

"Jack what's wrong?" Sam tried to ask as he forced his way passed her, his eyes steely cold.

Jack ignored her completely afraid that if he even acknowledged her presence he would do more damage than he could ever fix. He blocked out the thoughts of smashing Samantha Carter's face into the ground and concentrated on retrieving his two and a half year old daughter. "Lily my lovely come with me." he picked her up and held her close. Glancing around the room he gathered up her teddy and her comforter from the playpen and left the front room.

Once back on the porch Kyle's favourite T-rex caught his eye and he bent to pick it up. Sam was no longer there he realised, frantically his eye ran around the yard.

"Get away from him." he yelled making his little girl jump. He marched down the path. "Don't you dare touch him." He pushed her back by one shoulder and pulled his son in behind him out of harms way. "Don't you ever touch my son again you hear me."

His voice was raised to such a high a level that Lily began to wail in his arms. "Hush, hush sweetie, it's okay." he whispered placing a reassuing hand on hte back of her head as she leaned into him her hands over her ears. All the while he held his wife's eye, accusing her, blaming her. She was pale and drawn but he didn't care one jot about her pain, not anymore.

"Jack what-"

"Don't Sam. Just don't. I can't believe you would do that." She shook her head in confusion and that just made him even more angry. She made to speak. "Don't you dare. Don't you dare open your mouth." With that he turned on his heel and headed for the garage.

The door was open and as luck would have it both of the kid's booster seats were still strapped inside his truck from their weekend away. He placed his upset toddler into her seat and strapped it shut, she protested the sudden restriction, squalling loudly and kicking the seat in front of her. Next he helped his pale son up into his seat. The boy asked no questions, but he looked concerned as he watched the tears fall down his mother's face. "Everything is going to be fine Kyle, you hear me?" Gently he commanded his son's attention. "Daddy loves you."

"Where are we going?" he asked in a tiny fragile voice.

"Ah." Jack hadn't really thought about that. "We're going to go and see Grandpa George okay? Remember daddy promised you a visit? Well this is it, surprise!" The six year old bought the fake smile about as much as Jack himself did but bravely he nodded, his eye running back to his mother who was still standing quietly weeping nearby. "Kyle kiddo, hey look at me. I need you to look after your sister for me, can you do that? Good boy." he praised as his son nodded, unhesitant about shouldering the responsibility. "Here's her comforter, sing that song she likes will you, daddy will be right back. He just needs to go get something from the house okay?" The boy nodded again and sniffed loudly. Jack kissed his cheek and gave Lily's leg a quick squeeze trying to soothe her.

As soon as his son's attention was on his sister Jack spun and headed directly for Sam. He caught her by the arm and steered her round the corner out of sight of the garage. Mindful that he was still within earshot of the open car door and that the neighbours were probably watching, he released her quickly. "How could you Sam? You promised me." he voiced just barely in control of his tone.

"Promised you what Jack?" she asked openly, tears streaming down her face.

Absolute rage blacked out his vision for a moment, he couldn't speak, he couldn't act. Did she not know? Did she not even realise how close they had come? Or was she playing him, determined to not make this her fault. No that wasn't Sam, she was too honest to play him like that. None the less it was her fault. This whole mess was all her doing. He stared at her, she had betrayted him. Knowing how much she hated it he stared right through her, cutting her up without even so much as a word.

"Please Jack?" she reached out to him.

"Don't touch me." He jerked his arm back. Her hurt eyes told him that she had no idea what was going on. Still he couldn't find the words. Fine, he would show her. "Come with me. Come with me!" he ordered louder and pushed her ahead of him down the driveway.

"There you see?" he gestured to the open car door. Sam shook her head, still not understanding. "Take a closer look Carter." he forced her head into the open space in the car. He wasn't hurting her. Despite his rage he would never truly hurt her. Especially not when she was carrying his child. "What do you see?"

"I don't see anything Jack. Let go of me." He released her and she stepped away from him her hand on the back of her neck. She was getting angry now he could see it. Carter always could hold her own. "Since when did you start back at calling me Carter?" she spat obviously incensed.

He steadied himself as she squared up to him and ground the words out slow. "Since you broke the one promise that means everything to me."

For a long moment she just stared. Then he could see it in her eyes, suddenly she understood. "Oh good god no!" her hands shot up over her mouth and her already pale feature turned ashen grey. "No, no way." she pushed past him and dropped to her knees outside the passenger door. "Where is it?" she called as she rummaged around in the glove compartment and hunted under the seat.

"Under the god-damned car." Jack shot back over his shoulder as he walked away. Sam turned to look at her departing husband.

"Wait Jack."

"NO!" he yelled. "He had it in his hands Sam. He had that fucking thing in his hands." Jack was back over and raging into Sam's face. "My son had your gun in his tiny hands. You nearly killed him Sam. You nearly killed my son!" With that he turned and left her standing. He had to go before he did actually hurt her. Nothing was more important than his children.

Lily was quieter by the time he got into the car. Kyle was still singing to her, running his fingers through her sandy locks of hair. Her big brown eyes were staring adoringly at her brother. Somewhere Kyle had found a pacifier and it wouldn't be long till she was asleep, his T-rex cradled in her arms. Despite the immensity of his pain Jack felt a familiar tug of pride. "You're doing a heck of a good job there K-man. Keep it up. You're the best big brother a sister could hope for." Kyle smiled at his father in the rear view mirror before glancing around. They were reversing out of the drive way.

"Isn't mommy coming too?" he asked looking out of the window.

"No son, it's gonna be just us for a while. Mommy's tired, she needs to rest." It was a line the boy was used to hearing since Sam had gotten pregnant again.

"Oh." Kyle was looking back out the window at where his mother was standing in the middle of the road, she was saying something.

"Mitchell borrowed my car Jack, it's his. I swear I didn't know it was there. I swear I didn't know!" was the last Jack heard as he turned the corner out of his street determined never to look back.

AN: Oh god...what have I done?

Nope can't leave it at that, gotta fix it. Chapter two and the end to follow. I'll probably put it up tonight because there ain't no way I'm going to sleep now. I promise it will be fluffy and light, fix the mess I made...somehow!