Seesaw

...

When one brother rose, the other fell. ItaSakuSasu

...

Huffing, Sakura glanced over her shoulder with the edgy air of someone committing a terrible crime.

The two story house was firmly placed on the hill - made of the golden-red sandstone popular in the area and completely and utterly unthreatening. The entire thing was tucked snugly into the woods around it, so hidden that it almost had to be tripped over to be found. There was a garden too; filled with fragrant herbs, one sloping apple tree and surrounded by a charmingly clichéd picket fence.

Not the kind of place anyone would expect an infamous, parricide committing, mass murderer of an S-class criminal to live in.

And here she was - hands shaking like a leaf in the wind, cold sweat trickling down her spine despite the warmth of the late spring afternoon, the hairs on the back of her neck standing to attention like a line of tiny toy soldiers. She was only here because she was the only one to volunteer. Someone had to do it. Her feet - crammed into cute white broderie anglaise sandals - seemed to be attached to the ground in front of the gate.

Closing her eyes, Sakura took a deep breath. She had faced him in battle before, even though it hadn't actually been his body, and survived unscathed. Now he was completely blind, and supposedly repentant - secretly on their side the whole time. Her knees knocked together when she tried to take a step and she half stumbled through the gate - wincing as her shoes clicked unnecessarily loudly against the paved path and announcing to anyone in the area that she was here.

The few steps to his door seemed to be horribly long - her hand tense around the handle of the basket she had brought. Combined with the comfortable, light red, civilian dress she had chosen on whim for her 'day off', Sakura felt faintly ridiculous. Little Red Riding Hood in the woods on her way to meet the Big Bad Wolf. Sakura actually felt grateful that Uchiha Itachi would not be able to see and comment.

Lifting her fist, she knocked twice. Brief, concise; she was calm and in control.

A few tense seconds passed before she heard a faint masculine voice. "Come in."

Her hand seemed to freeze on the doorknob - the faint imprint of her fingers crushed into the metal in her nervousness - before she twisted it with a faint click and pushed into the warm hallway. A thick, tribal woven rug sprawled from the door to a small staircase with doors on either side. Sakura stood stiff at the threshold - not daring to venture further into the seemingly innocuous dwelling until she could see him. Her free hand sought a kunai.

"To what do I owe the pleasure?" Itachi asked, moving forward slowly towards her from the room behind the staircase - as though approaching a shy deer that would leap away at the sign of any sudden movement.

His eyes were as black as a bleak inner horizon, as a dark, burning star on its last legs. "You know why I'm here." Sakura said, keeping her tone heavy in contrast to his light pleasantness - still refusing to move from the doorway.

He walked a few measure steps forwards, gait smooth and still vaguely predatory. It was all she could do not to drop the supplies she had brought and launch herself into the brilliant, beautiful day. Stopping before her, expression bland, the faintest hint of a smirk quirked the edge of his thin mouth. His eyes were as black as a bleak inner horizon, as a dark, burning star on its last legs, but when he tilted his head slightly the light caught them in such a way that they almost seemed scarlet.

Maybe that was why she felt compelled to take a step back.

"I would not have a guest feel so nervous in my own home."

"I'm not!" Sakura hissed back, mortified by his mirth, but betrayed by the slight tremor in her voice.

Kami knows how he could tell - from her chakra perhaps - or because she had moved ever so slightly further away from him. She proffered the basket filled with food, a book on philosophy that she had skimmed on the way here, and a few other necessities. Obviously he could not see her do this - although she was sure he could tell and was not reacting in a sadistic method of prolonging her discomfort.

Well, it wasn't like he got many visitors.

"Here," she almost snapped, feeling more than a little hysterical at this point.

He still moved slowly, almost sensuous in a way that made her skin crawl. His fingers brushed hers slightly as he accepted the basket. "Thank you," that note of amusement she was sure she had detected previously still seemed present.

"Goodbye," Sakura choked, voice as brittle as dry twigs.

She refused to show him her back - and walked out without turning around before bolting off with the tattered rags of her dignity trailing behind. When she risked a glance behind her, she was sure she could see his hand raised in a polite goodbye.

Their encounter had not shaken his composure in the slightest.

...

Still shaken almost half an hour later, Sakura paused at the door of her apartment building and tried to calm herself.

Sasuke would notice in an instant if she was unsettled and she did not, under any circumstances, want to tell him where she had been - who she had visited. Taking another deep breath, she pushed the door open and walked slowly up the stairs - feeling the familiar slide of the wooden banister comfortingly beneath her fingertips. Sasuke was already in, but had probably only got in from training with Naruto not that long ago.

And sure enough, his hair was still damp from a recent shower when she sashayed in and made her way over to where he was sitting on the dark blue couch. In his hands she could see the familiar sight of his favourite book on fire jutsu, the pages dog-eared and curling from the attention.

He didn't look up when she entered the room, but Sakura chose to take that as a sign of trust. She was not a threat. She placed her hand on his cheek, tilting his face to give him a gentle, welcoming kiss. He yielded to her - dark eyes flitting shut for a moment - but stiffened when she began to pull away. A warm, rough hand came up to hold her wrist almost tightly enough to bruise.

"Sasuke," Sakura began, questioning note in her voice.

"Where were you, Sakura?" His voice was tense - eyes hard, black stones.

"The market, Ino's, that's all," her voice stayed measured even as she lied.

He believed her though after a brittle second when she thought he might push harder, but he seemed to accept her answer. Sasuke released her wrist, allowing his hand to trail down the length of her forearm in a small gesture of reparation.

"I just thought you smelled... odd. Nothing more," he rubbed a hand across his forehead in exasperation, "I'll request another mission; sitting around here..."

"You've been training all day though," Sakura said, affectionately running her hand through his thick, damp, inky coloured hair, relieved by the change in subject.

He moved away, dismissively, and her mouth twisted just a little bitterly before she could stop it. "It's not the same as a mission."

Sakura sank into the couch beside Sasuke - near delighted when he lifted his arm and gently manoeuvred her to lay her head on his chest and press her body up against him. He resumed reading in lieu of starting a conversation, but Sakura was fine with avoiding any chance of broaching the subject she did not want him to find out about - ever. After around twenty minutes, the encounter with Itachi was completely wiped from her mind and she finally felt completely relaxed as she breathed in Sasuke's clean, if slightly ash tainted, scent.

"Hm, I should go and get something for dinner," Sakura, said reluctantly - stretching like a cat.

Sasuke said nothing as she stood and began to get ready; slipping her shoes back on and primping her hair in the mirror. Just as she moved to open the door his voice sounded from behind her, though he made no move to get up.

"Didn't you get anything when you were at the market?" Sasuke asked, voice soft but with a steely undertone that sucked the air from her lungs.

She leaned against the door for support as she pulled it open.

"I got... totally side-tracked by Ino," Sakura said, turning back and smiling at him, "But I'll be quick. Love you, okay?"

He said nothing; face as blank and pale and smooth as a Noh mask. Sakura had to press her back against the wall when she escaped to the hallway to stop her knees from buckling.

...

"I won't go again, Shishou."

Her statement was obviously unwise because Shizune quickly slunk from the room afterwards. Sakura stayed strong and unbending - meeting her mentor fully in the eyes. Tsunade was silent for a moment - the calm before the storm - and took a long, savoured drink from her ever present sake bottle.

"Was he violent? Did he threaten you?" She asked, bottle almost at her lips.

When she didn't answer Tsunade slammed her sake bottle so violently on her desk that it cracked a little around the top. Her gold eyes narrowed in a way that promised a typhoon of anger following - two high spots of combined fury and alcohol already present on her cheeks.

"I had though my apprentice was taught to be strong! Not some cowering little girl whimpering at the first sign of discomfort! He needs a medic, and so Kami help me, he is not our prisoner. If I find out that you have treated him with anything - anything! - less than the utmost kindness, care and respect I'll have you strung up from Hokage Mountain by your tongue - do you understand me, Sakura?"

Sakura stayed perfectly still. Interrupting Tsunade in the middle of one of her tirades was tantamount to a death wish. She appeared to calm, sinking back into her seat and taking another long draught.

"And, unlike Sasuke, he has never wavered from the orders of Konoha", that stung, Sakura opened her mouth to argue, but was stopped by the unusually melancholic expression on Tsunade's face," We could not ask for a more loyal shinobi. He suffered for the sake of this Village and the Elders intend to integrate him back into our society. It will take time, and he may never be accepted, as you are aware."

She took another long drink. The silence was so brittle Sakura felt as though she could snap it with her bare hands. Anger stormed through her from head to toe. After all he had done to Sasuke - the years of mental torture were most certainly not orders that was for sure - they were still welcoming that murderer back with open arms.

"Give him a chance, Sakura, that is all I ask. You - of all people - have never lacked compassion."

Sakura left silently her hands still squeezed into tight fists. She recognised an order when she heard one.

...

She felt far more ready to face Itachi dressed in her full shinobi gear rather than the flimsy civilian dress she had chosen last time. Her fingers caressed the hilt of a kunai - anger simmering in her stomach as she knocked the door.

Itachi pulled the door open for her this time rather than have her open it herself. His eyes stared sightlessly into the trees for a moment before they slid downwards to focus on her despite the fact that she hadn't spoken.

"Did you enjoy the book?" He said, by way of greeting.

"How did you...?" He must have smelled her on it - felt the faint imprint on her fingers on the pages, the light crease on the spine that wouldn't have been there had it never been read. Sakura paused, considering, "What little I did read of it was good."

Her tone was so casual it sounded forced. Both of them - Itachi and Sasuke - truly had unnatural senses. She had to be careful. This entire situation could crumble on her like a house of cards at the slightest disturbance. He nodded - a minute gesture she might have missed had she not been watching him like prey eyed a predator in their midst - and courteously stood aside, holding the door open, to let her in.

"I did not catch your name last time."

Sakura winced at the reference to her previous cowardly exit, "Haruno Sakura, Uchiha-san.

"Ah, I had thought I recognised your chakra signal. You are my outou's teammate, correct?" His casual tone made her defensive. She wondered if he was fishing for any information in particular. Still, she refused to step inside.

"I'm his girlfriend and his teammate, yes," she added with some pride, hoping the additional information would ward him away.

He simply inclined his head and remained silent until Sakura felt she was forced to speak again.

"I have some forms for you to fill in and... I need to give you a check-up," she dragged her words as a sullen child dragged its heels, reluctant to step into his domain.

"If you like, you can read the book while I fill out these forms." His thoughtfulness made her want to scream.

She moved inside and tried not to jump when Itachi gently closed the door behind her. The tiny hallway felt claustrophobic - his nearness made her hackles raise. He brushed passed her to walk into one of the rooms that lead off from the hallway and an electric shock seemed to leap through every cell in her body. He smelled exactly like Sasuke. Like thought made bile rise to the back of her throat.

"I would... like that, I mean." She struggled with the words, tongue thick with revulsion.

He nodded. Silence spread through the room like smoke. Sighing minutely, she shifted the basket to the other arm before following him into what turned out to be a kitchen. A plate with a half-eaten stick of dango and a steaming mug sat on the table indicating that she had interrupted him in the middle of a meal.

"I didn't mean to disturb you," Sakura said, shifting from foot to foot awkwardly.

"Not at all," Itachi answered, voice measured and even, "I would not be adverse to you joining me."

"No thank you, I'm not hungry."

Her stomach chose that exact moment to let out an ear-splitting growl. She winced as he smirked, and put the basket down on the table with a soft 'thump'. Shishou's words rang in her ears, scalding hot. She swallowed and smiled tightly - more for her benefit that his own.

"In fact, that would be lovely," she said, slipping into the seat.

As though he had anticipated her change of heart, Itachi already had a plate with the sticky dessert in his hand and placed it carefully in front of her. For a moment she was jealous of the amount of grace he possessed - engrained in every fibre of his being - before he sat down and his knees brushed hers. Sakura snapped her teeth together so tightly a stab of pain lanced along her jaw. She stared hard at the table as though to see through it to where they were now firmly touching. Itachi was perfectly relaxed, but he also seemed to be waiting... for her reaction perhaps.

He seemed to be testing the water between them. Seeing how far he could push her - just like Sasuke.

She took a deliberate bite out of the dango and reached for the book between them. He flicked through the forms idly - the slightest spike of chakra alerting to the fact that he was using one of his few approved jutsu to read through a kind of chakra absorption. She was a little vague on the details, but the jutsu involved him spreading a small amount of chakra across the paper and almost absorbing the characters on it allowing them to be read.

The silence was stretched as taunt as a drum skin - ready to burst at any moment. She ate quickly and efficiently - keeping her eyes on her food or the book and studiously ignoring the warmth that seeped from their point of contact. Sakura refused to move backwards - that would be showing yet another sign of weakness that her ego simply could not tolerate. They both finished around the same time. The plates were collected without a single word spoken.

Itachi turned his back to her to face the sink. A movement that displayed a trust that didn't sit right with her in the slightest. Her teeth gritted together like two shards of shattered porcelain.

The sleeves of his slim, long sleeved black top were rolled back to the elbows to expose his strong, pale forearms and slightly damp hands as he dipped his fingers into the lightly steaming water.

"I'll dry," Sakura muttered, grudgingly, standing.

They stood in an almost companionable silence were it not for the way Sakura avoided touching him at all costs as they passed the dishes between them. He methodically cleaned and when she found her eyes following the tracks the soap suds made across his skin she suddenly became very interested in the blue pattern on the town she was using to dry.

When it came to giving him a check-up, Sakura reluctantly followed him upstairs to his bedroom - more than unwilling to enter such a private space. First, she checked his vitals; heartbeat, lungs, kidneys, liver... This was easier than she had expected - the familiar cloak of Medic-Mode making the entire interaction far smoother. Then, he lay down on the bed without complaint and allowed her to probe his eyes for a good half an hour.

She hesitated at this point - sure for a moment that he might suddenly leap up and attempt to snap her neck. The stiff, corpse-like way he lay there put her on edge more than she would have liked to admit. His skin was surprisingly smooth to touch and she had to fight the sudden, lightning fast urge to run her fingers down the twin lines of stress on his face. The room was small and warmed almost to the temperature of blood - like sinking into a hot bath - she had to fight the desire to let her guard down even the tiniest amount.

The Elders didn't want his eyesight restored just yet - not until they were one hundred percent sure they wanted to welcome him back - but Sakura knew the process would take months if it could be done at all. She wasn't sure if she preferred him silent or speaking. The silence grated on her a little - she always wanted to fill it with conversation - but she disliked how soothing his deep, lilting voice was.

This time she showered and changed before Sasuke came home to avoid a similar confrontation as last time.

...

Itachi still managed to seep into their conversations, their interactions. Although, if she truly thought about it his shadow had always been cast over them. Sasuke slept restlessly, or not at all.

"I know he's still alive, still, even now - and I know he's near Konoha," He murmured one night, hands tented behind his head - glaring at the ceiling.

She rolled over and watched him with guarded eyes, asking "who" although she already knew.

"Itachi," he hissed the word, tasting each syllable on his tongue.

Sakura considered her own response as he rolled away from her - presenting her his lean, pale, bare back. "They - Shishou, the Elders - say it was an order," she said, quietly, lying perfectly still.

The faint, eerie red glow that just tainted the air of the room told her in no uncertain terms that his Sharingan had activated from strong emotion. "Only a monster would kill their own family for any reason. Order or not."

She kissed him between the shoulder blades - feeling the muscles as tense as a bowstring - and tucked herself around him. "Go to sleep, Sasuke."

Even so, she lay awake all night thinking about it. Her morals, her feelings and her mind wrestled until she was too tired to sleep. Questions danced behind her closed eyelids - taunting her into wakefulness.

...

"That's it - enough is enough," Tsunade waved her hand dismissively.

Sakura craned her neck to see around the mountainous piles of paperwork that decorated the desk. "What, Shishou?"

"I'm removing you from Uchiha duty, that's what, I can't stand seeing your sullen face after these visits. I'll send Nobu instead."

"Yes, Shishou."

Sakura tried to convince herself that the sudden, lead balloon feeling in the pit of her gut was actually relief.

...

A few weeks down the line, and she found herself standing in front of that little picket fence again - feeling every bit like a person about to begin an illicit affair.

...

First chapter dedicated to my favourite creeper - TwistedInABottle.

I suppose I have my English class, and the book Master of Ballantrae to vaguely thank for the beginning spark of this fic. There will probably be just one more part to this. Perhaps two.

Kisses,

Silver ~ x