Minato yelled in manly surprise, Kakashi stoically curled up into a ball, and Obito and Rin screamed when the swirling vortex appeared out of nowhere and sucked them in. When the insane ride which included flashing psychedelic colors and clocks of many makes and models which had hands that were moving so fast that they were a blur and digits scrolling by too quickly to be read swirling about them was over, they found themselves back in Konoha. More specifically, they were back in Konoha and located in various spots scattered around the Hokage's office.
"That was awesome, let's do that again!" Obito enthusiastically yelled from where he was sprawled on the carpet. Minato, Rin, and Kakashi - who had rolled into a wall after the vortex spat him out - weren't inclined to agree with him.
"And just what are you doing in my office?" a woman's voice called from overhead as an ominous shadow fell over the quartet.
Minato found himself looking at Senju Tsunade's sizable...assets when he looked up to see the source of the voice and the shadow.
Since when had the Hokage's office belonged to Tsunade?
After a very thorough examination that proved that they were exactly who they said they were - apparently time and inter-dimensional travel was more common than they tried to let on around here - they were given the addresses of Kakashi and someone named Naruto - who would apparently be happy to meet them - and turned loose in the village.
"Well, now I know why I wasn't given my own address." Minato said as he and his students stared up at the Hokage Monument.
"Hey! How about we go check out Kakashi's place." Obito suggested after they had been staring at the monument for a while. Kakashi, Minato, and Rin all agreed that this would be a good idea as they too wanted to see what a grown-up Kakashi was like. Obito was silently praying that he'd had a rectal stickectomy, but seriously doubted it.
&!&!&
Kakashi kissed Naruto once more before he unfastened the young man's pants. The anticipation grew nearly unbearable as the orange material slid down the blond's thighs. The pants were below his lover's knees when he was interrupted by...a slightly muffled scream. He whirled around to find the source of the scream and found himself looking at...Team Minato?
His younger self was staring at him in absolute shock and horror both of his eyes - strange, he'd almost forgotten what having two matching eyes was like - were almost impossibly wide. Obito was staring and pointing at him, his jaw was dropped and his mouth was wide open. Rin was rapidly turning an unhealthy looking shade of red, and his former Sensei was giving him a strange look.
"Kakashi-sensei wha...?" Naruto asked as he looked over at the group in confusion.
"S-Sensei?" Obito squeaked looking even more shocked, if that was even possible.
Minato-sensei's look turned from slightly squicked to downright disapproving.
As soon as he found out who had cast this extremely realistic looking Genjutsu, he was going to murder them. Using his teammates' memory to...whatever the hell they had planned - probably something that had to do with the morality of his relationship with Naruto or lack thereof - had more than crossed the line. As he tried and failed to dispel the Genjutsu a second time, there was a knock at the door. He got up and opened the door to find Sakura standing on his welcome mat.
"Kakashi-sensei, Tsunade-sama sent me to tell you that your former team traveled to the future, and that they might be dropping by soon since she gave them your address." Sakura said, turning pink as she took in the fact that he was only half dressed.
He moved aside so she could see the group that were standing in the middle of his tiny apartment. The girl's eyes widened as she took them in.
"Y-Yondaime-sama, I'm Haruno Sakura and...Naruto! What are you doing sitting there in front of the Yondaime in your underwear? Get dressed!" Sakura said going from shocked to obsequious to irritated in a second flat.
Naruto raced to comply with Sakura's order. Once he was fully dressed, he stood there staring at Minato-Sensei with an awed and amazed look on his face.
"Naruto, huh." Minato-sensei said after giving Naruto an appraising glance, and finding him slightly lacking.
"Yep. My name's Uzumaki Naruto and I'm going to be Hokage someday!" Naruto exclaimed cheerfully.
"Uzumaki? Isn't that...?" Obito asked before his eyes once more widened in shock and horrified realization. He hadn't seen Obito like this since Minato-sensei had given them all The Talk.
"Oh. My. God." Rin said looking shocked and slightly sick.
His younger self seemed to be hyperventilating and looking for some place to hide.
Realization eventually dawned on Minato-sensei. He went from looking slightly bewildered to looking slightly poleaxed for a moment before he started looking pissed, very, very pissed.
The wave of killing intent that Minato-sensei gave off hit him an instant later nearly knocked him over. He had known that had sensei still been alive, he wouldn't have exactly given them his blessing but, he hadn't known that his former sensei's reaction would be this bad. Sensei didn't even know Naruto beyond the fact that he was most likely his offspring, and he was alread beyond pissed and in the territory of wanting to rend him limb from limb. He wasn't just screwed, he was double screwed. Hell, screwed didn't even begin to cover what he was right now. Running would probably be a very good idea.
He shot out the window, barely noting that it was open, and probably how his former teammates had gotten in without him noticing while he was ahem, otherwise occupied. Obito had always been very good with traps. Minato wasn't even half second behind him, and he was no match for his former sensei in the speed department even without the Hiraishin. His only hope for survival seemed to be the fact that Konoha had a slightly different layout since the Kyuubi attack, and the Sand and Sound invasion and there was a small chance that he could lose his former sensei in an alley that hadn't existed in his time, but that was a very slim chance at best...
&!&!&
"Um...What just happened?" Sakura asked when she picked herself up off the floor. That seemed to be the most extreme reaction she had seen anyone have upon hearing Naruto's name, though she had absolutely no idea why the person who had had said reaction had turned around and attacked Kakashi-sensei instead of Naruto.
"A-Are you and Kakashi really sleeping together?" Uchiha Obito - Kakashi's former (deceased) teammate - asked her blond teammate.
Naruto blushed and nodded. The girl - Rin - turned to the younger version of Kakashi and gave him a look of utter disgust. The boy didn't notice it however, as he was too busy staring at Kakashi-sensei's sizable porn collection in absolute horror.
Naruto and Kakashi had started their relationship shortly after Naruto had returned from his three-year training trip with Jiraiya. Reactions to the relationship had been somewhat mixed. She had pretty much taken the relationship in stride since it had made both of her teammates very happy, and she didn't have any particular feelings about homosexual relationships either way. The fact that Naruto had once been, and could technically still be considered Kakashi-sensei's student was slightly disturbing, but that was about it as far as she was concerned.
Most of the people who had a problem with Naruto and Kakashi-sensei's relationship either disapproved of homosexuality in general, or were somewhat squicked over the fact that Kakashi-sensei had been and sort of still was Naruto's teacher since he was helping Naruto with his Elemental Affinity. Those that weren't upset about the relationship for those two reasons generally were upset that Kakashi and/or Naruto hadn't ended up with them.
The villagers tended to whisper about Naruto and Kakashi, but nobody had dared to call Naruto a fag to his face after what happened to the one person stupid enough to do so while Kakashi-sensei was in earshot. Jiraiya glared at Kakashi-sensei every time they encountered each-other and Tsunade looked disapproving every time the relationship was discussed, but neither said anything about it, at least not when either she or Naruto were around.
Ino and a select few young women around the village including Ayame from Ichiraku's however seemed to find the relationship incredibly romantic and would constantly comment on what a cute couple the two made.
"That's just sick." the Uchiha said when he finally found his voice after a rather long silence during which the boy's face had shifted through several expressions.
"What's wrong with me and Kakashi-sensei being together?" Naruto yelled back slightly belligerently.
"Other than the fact that he's your sensei? You're Minato-sensei's son." the Uchiha said, sounding upset.
Yikes. In that light, Naruto and Kakashi's relationship had taken on a whole new and highly disturbing aspect. From that view, it looked as if Kakashi-sensei had used his position of authority to seduce the child of his former teacher who - now that she thought about it - was only little more than half his age, possibly in hopes of using him as a replacement for said teacher for whatever reason. Damn, no wonder Kakashi-sensei's old team including the younger version of Kakashi-sensei himself were upset. Hell, if she'd been one of Naruto's parents she probably would've...
Wait a minute...Naruto was the Yondaime's son?
&!&!&
Hatake Kakashi aged 13 felt like fainting, or throwing up at the very least. What the hell happened to him? How the hell had he gone from being a top-notch shinobi on the fast track to becoming a Jounin to becoming a porn addicted pedophile. Okay, since the kid in question was an older teenager, he could technically be considered an ephebophile, but that still wasn't okay, his older self had to be at least thirty for the gods' sakes. To make matters worse, his adult self was sleeping with sensei's son, and had probably been doing so since before sensei was cold in his grave since there was no way in hell sensei would allow something like that to happen while he was alive.
Though he wasn't really all that interested in such things, he'd pretty much figured that he was bisexual. He'd had warm fuzzy crush-like feelings for people of both sexes before, even though he hadn't yet acted on them. He didn't even want to know what would happen if he tried to give Gai flowers or something stupid like that. It would probably lead to here, and the sight that had scarred him for life now that he thought about it.
Up until today, he hadn't screamed since that incident with that swarm of bees and the Katon jutsu that didn't help the way Obito intended, and the reason he'd screamed then was because he'd been in an incredible amount of pain due to the fact that he was on fire. It had been bad enough when he thought that the boy called Naruto was just some orange wearing weirdo who looked a great deal like sensei - which spoke a great deal about issues he didn't even want to consider - but, to discover that he's the child sensei and Kushina-san were just one accident away from having...
A quick Katon jutsu took care of the bookcase full of porn (half of the "erotic" novels that comprised a significant portion of the collection which also contained a number of magazines and highly inappropriate comics appeared to have been written by sensei's sensei Jiraiya). There was no way in hell he was ever going to become perverted enough to keep a bookcase that reached up to the ceiling filled with porn of all kinds from books to film, and tiny figurines in compromising positions. A bookcase full of jutsu scrolls and souvenirs from his journeys maybe, but never a bookcase full of porn.
Obito put the flaming bookcase out with a quick water jutsu. The boy had had to learn a large number of those after a number of his fire jutsus had gone wrong in just about every way possible, including destroying sensei's tent once.
"Hey! Are you trying to burn this place down?" Obito yelled.
Burning this place down wouldn't be a bad idea. A couple quick Katon jutsus, mabe one in the tiny kitchen alcove, and one on the bed where...where...
He found himself running into the tiny space that housed the small apartment's toilet.
&!&!&!&
Minato's smile turned positively feral. He'd finally caught up to the bastard he'd called student. The man had led him on a merry chase through back streets and alleys that didn't exist during his time, but he wasn't nearly fast enough. Now it was time to find out exactly what it was he was going to do to the person who dared to take advantage of his and Kushina's baby. Whatever it was going to be, it would be slow and painful...