… … …

There's a part of me that wishes
All my dreams come true…

… … …

It's quite ridiculous that you occupy my thoughts for so many hours of a day. If you're not with me then I can't stop wondering when you'll be back; can't stop waiting to see you again; can't help the niggling feeling that wherever you are some man could be falling in love with you. That sounds melodramatic, but who wouldn't fall in love with you?

If you are with me it's all I can do not to spend every moment gazing at you and thinking about how beautiful you are - mentally; physically - how much I love to see your lips curve into a smile; how proud I feel to have caused that; how devastated I am that my actions in the last few months have caused pain to cross your beautiful face instead. And it takes all my strength not to say it all out loud.

I wish I could. I wish I could tell you everything. Admit that I know exactly how I feel about you. Voice each and every thought; take that step nearer when I've already pushed myself as far into your personal space as I can permit myself to be. I long to be able to make you happy; to make every wish you've ever made come true… But I know I'm not the right person to do that. You deserve someone who won't spend months pushing you away because he's terrified of his love for you.

And one day you will find someone who deserves to have you love him in return. So, it is ridiculous that you occupy my thoughts for so many hours of a day when I know I will never tell you; that you must never know.

I love you. I do. But it would be so much easier if I didn't.

… … …

… And a part of me that prays
I'll wake up some day
Over you.

… … …