Uncovering the Unexpected

Chapter 4

Despite the pressure from Harry and Ron, Hermione managed to keep her mouth shut on what she and Professor Snape had discussed.

She was curious on what he had meant by "feeding the rumor so it would get old quicker." What was he going to do? Would it involve her? Dear Merlin she hoped it wouldn't. She had enough problems to worry about.

But, during breakfast in the Great Hall, Snape seemed perfectly normal. Well, if you could call his usual self normal. In fact, it seemed as if he didn't know the whole school was talking about what was in his pants.

"Come on, Hermione," Ron begged again. She had lost track of how many times he had prodded her for information. "What did he say?"

"Nothing," Hermione answered automatically, cutting her gaze away from Snape to stare at her two best friends.

Harry's eyes narrowed. "You're lying, aren't you? Something bad must have really happened, then. Did he suspend you? Take a hundred points from Gryffindor?"

Only fifty...Hermione thought to herself, but didn't answer.

The rest of the morning her friends did their best to pry her of any information, but it was futile. She wasn't going to tell, not after Snape told her not to. She had already spread enough information about her Professor that year.

But still, she wanted to know exactly what Snape had planned.

So when Potions rolled around the corner, Hermione felt both curiosity and dread.

The class started off like it did every time.

They all got out their books and quills, sitting in their normal seats. Snape was at his desk, finishing up some teacher stuff. Hermione wondered if he had always been this busy writing stuff down, or if fate had decided to do this just to make her feel uncomfortable for longer amounts of time.

After a moment he stood up, surveying the class with that same unreadable expression he always wore. Hermione gulped.

"Now, class, considering that most of you failed to make a basic love potion last class, we're going to re-do it," Snape began in his normal tone. "This time, though, I expect you all to try and act like you're not complete idiots for an hour. Understand?"

The class nodded, a few students looking giggly, probably thinking about the rumor that had spread.

"Okay, now that it's settled, I'd like to start off by-" Snape suddenly stopped himself, cutting his gaze away from the class to glare down at Ron. "-Mr. Weasley, would you please explain why you are staring at my pants like that?"

Hermione looked over at Ron. He was blushing, staring up at their professor with a horrified expression on his face. For a moment Hermione wondered if he had been actually staring at Snape's pants or if this was some sort of game Snape was playing.

The whole class had fallen to a dead silence. It seemed as if everyone wanted to laugh, but knew better than to in front of their professor.

"Um...erm...well," Ron stuttered incoherently.

Snape looked annoyed, staring down at the red-haired boy with an icy look in his eyes. "I'm waiting."

Ron still didn't answer.

"Surely, Mr. Weasley, it couldn't be that hard, could it?" Snape drawled accusingly, almost menacingly. "I mean, it's not that big of a question, is it?"

Ron, along with most of the rest of the class, looked like he wanted to die of embarrassment. "I-I don't understand."

"Oh, I think you do." Snape said accusingly, putting his hands on Ron's desk. "Tell me, is there something on my pants?"

"I wasn't staring at your trousers, sir." Ron said quietly. "So I wouldn't know."

A small sneer appeared on the professor's face. "Are you sure you weren't? Because, for a moment there, I could have sworn you were checking me out. Maybe there wasn't something on my pants you were noticing, but something in them."

Hermione had to bite her cheeks to keep herself from laughing. Ron, who was next to her, looking purely terrified. "I wouldn't...I mean, I wasn't...I could never...sir."

Snape suddenly removed his hands from the desk, straightening up and walking back to the front of the room. Every pair of eyes followed him, full of disbelief. "It has come to my attention that there are a few rumors going around the school about myself," he began, turning around to stare at the class, his voice even.

A few students took in a sharp sudden intake of breath, surprised. Hermione was staring at him, wide-eyed. She had never thought he would address the matter directly. Ron looked about ready to hex himself.

"Now, that being said, I don't normally care for gossip. And, well, gossip concerning me is not something I will tolerate. I wish for these rumors to stop immediately, and if I hear anyone talk about it or see anyone who is thinking about laughing in my class, I will happily hand out a detention. Do I make myself clear?"

The class nodded meekly.

Snape smirked slightly, and then continued, "Now, back to our lesson...Mrs. Granger, what do you want?"

Hermione hadn't realized she had raised her hand. It was kind of an automatic move, one that you did without even thinking. She gulped, feeling suddenly brave about what she was about to ask.

"Well, sir, I was kind of wondering...Exactly how big is your manhood?"

Another dead silence entered the room. No one spoke, fearing sudden death if they did. Snape looked shocked by her question, and he stared at her with an expression she couldn't read.

But, after a moment, he spoke. "I find that question highly inappropriate, Miss. Granger. Ten points from Gryffindor."

"Well, we were all wondering, sir," Hermione stated boldly. "Could you tell us?"

Snape gave her a hard stare, looking as if he was planning to make her go to detention every week until her death. But, finally, he opened his mouth, and when he spoke, his voice was even. "Well, Mrs. Granger, I don't exactly know. But if I had to guess, maybe about eight inches?"

Damn...

The whole class turned red. The most hated teacher in the school had just announced the size of his package. Although Snape seemed to have only answered to humor himself, everyone was still covered in a shocked sort of awe.

Hermione was going to stay silent, but another question came to mind. "Um, could you possibly show us, sir?"

She knew the question was completely absurd. And besides, she had already seen him in all his glory. She couldn't believe the incident was only a few nights ago, considering it seemed like forever had passed. The image of his naked body was still sharp in her mind, clearer than ever.

But still...maybe she wanted to see him like that again.

And, for a moment, she thought she was going to. Snape got this odd expression on his face, and she thought he was actually going to pull down his pants down in the middle of class.

But no, he stared her straight in the eye and narrowed his eyes. "Ten points from Gryffindor."

Hermione felt disappointed. And, by looking at the faces of the other students, she didn't think she was the only one.

Class continued normally after that, and right before it was over everyone began to put their notes and quills away in their bags. Hermione was about to get up and leave, until she heard a dark, brooding voice from behind her.

"Miss. Granger, would you please stay after class? I have something I need to...show you."

Hermione smiled.

The end.

Well, I hope you enjoyed the story. I had fun writing it, even if some of it was a bit out of character. Review on your thoughts, please. I'd love to hear your feedback.

Also, I know they don't use American measurements in Europe. I just didn't know what the equivalent for inches would be.