I Run To You

By: Shannon Collins

Summary: This time our favorite couple will meet as young adults. From the very moment they are thrust together by chance when they spot one another in a college hallway, neither can resist the undeniable force drawing them together. Though utterly spellbound, Sully can't understand why Michaela continues to resist her feelings for him, remaining emotionally distance. What he doesn't know are the shadows of her past that left indelible marks on her heart. Having survived an abusive relationship that left both emotional and physical scars, letting a man back into her heart proves more challenging than she could have imagined. Having a past of his own full of heartache, Sully stops at nothing to prove his love for the woman he knows to be his soulmate.

Disclaimer: I do not own the characters or names of characters. Both are property of the creators of Dr. Quinn Medicine Woman, Beth Sullivan, and the CBS network.

Author's Note: I would like to point out quickly that though this chapter deals with violent material that is angst-filled this will not be a frequent occurrence throughout the piece. Though it was important to establish this character's past, most of this story takes place in the present to which the toxic relationship described in this chapter no longer exists.

Secondly, I would like to personally thank Linda, my incredible beta reader, for all the encouragement, support, and wonderful thoughts and words she's contributed to making this piece a success. I feel so blessed to have such a talented writer in my corner as I strive to create another successful work on a lovestory that has touched us all.

Now without further ado, the journey begins….

Ch.1

Zipping the metallic zipper of her turquoise hooded sweatshirt, she took a deep breath, closing her eyes gently as the heaviness of exhaustion quickly set in. Opening them again, she flipped the light-switch down before climbing into the full-sized bed in the corner of the room. Looking down at the small braided ties dangling from the hood, she tried to fill her mind with memories of when she had received it, for her twenty-first birthday seven months ago. Grabbing the blankets and pulling them up over her, she glanced around the room, feeling her heart thumping in fear as it always did when she found herself surrounded by darkness.

Telling herself over and over, 'This is totally irrational… Only children are afraid of the dark…' she willed herself, as she did every night, to try to ignore the feelings deep inside of her. Sighing deeply she fought off her exhausted body long enough to take a few small steps towards the bathroom, quickly switching the light on.

Upon returning to bed she shook her head slightly, knowing how ridiculous she was being. Even though she had given into her fears and switched that small light on, she knew those dreams would still haunt her, as they did every night. However, at least she wouldn't see his face lurking in the darkness before she drifted off to sleep. And as her head hit the pillow, she prayed for one night free from the pain.

Finally, allowing her eyes to shut tightly, she wished with everything inside of her that those flashes of utter terror wouldn't invade her dreams, but she knew they would. They always did….

"I've gotta take her home. I'll hit ya up when I get back man," David called out towards the open front door with a wave, as he walked along the tiny concrete path to the driveway, one arm around Michaela.

After waving in his friend's direction one last time, he watched as the wooden front door closed completely. The second the door clicked shut, she could see the light leave his eyes. In one swift motion, he retracted his arm from its gentle position around her shoulder and violently clamped his fingers around her right wrist, tugging her along behind him.

She winced at his painful grip, wanting to cry out but knowing how dangerous that was. As he dragged her forcefully closer towards the driveway, she couldn't help but realize how amazed she was by how quickly he could turn a loving, almost intimate touch into one that was so painful she had to clench her teeth powerfully to keep from crying out.

Once he reached the door of his silver BMW Z4 convertible, he yanked her arm so hard she thought he could possibly have dislocated her shoulder, and she couldn't control the small moan that escaped her lips. Throwing her forcefully against the car door, she felt her head spinning slightly as she tried to concentrate on every breath she took rather than her body's reaction to his assault. Releasing his grip on her wrist, he placed both hands on either side of her face, his body pressing into hers. Feeling the icy cold metal against her back, she wished more than anything that she could stop herself from shuddering in fear. Feeling his body pressed so closely against hers only served to heighten the completely hysterical panic rising inside. He looked on in what she could only describe as pleasure, as her eyes widened through their own accord the second she felt his body's natural excitement upon being so very close to her.

As she stared into those menacing eyes full of hatred, she took a deep breath, willing herself to remain calm. It was when she panicked that it truly was the worst. She would never forget the night he had shown her that…

It was the night of his fraternity's winter formal… Every year it took place at the same hotel four hours out-of-town in order for the underage parties to drink freely without worrying about repercussions from campus authorities. Rather than plan to make the long four-hour drive back to campus, he had arranged to stay at the hotel overnight. Thinking she would allow him to manipulate her in any way he wished, he had pushed her too far.

From the very start she was uncomfortable with the idea of staying overnight at this hotel alone with him, however, he hadn't given her any choice. Her suspicions proved to be founded when the second he had her alone with the door locked, he had forcefully shoved her onto the bed, sitting directly beside her. At first she had willingly played into his plans, until he had wanted to go further than she felt comfortable with. The second he had unzipped her dress in one quick movement, she had immediately reacted, quickly prying his hands from her back as she jerked her head back swiftly.

She had asked him to stop, explaining that he was making her uncomfortable, but his dark side quickly began to rise to the surface. He simply ignored her and the second their lips connected again, she felt his hand on her shoulder pushing down the tiny strap on her dress. At first she had let it slide thinking he wouldn't continue to push, but once again she had underestimated him. And as he attempted to slide his hand down the front of her dress, she had abruptly pulled back again and out of instinct alone, slapped him across the face. She instantly regretted her action the second he looked over at her, knowing she had awoke a sleeping tiger.

He hadn't responded with words, rather he had forced her backward, pinning her wrists above her head with one hand. Visions of him pushing her over the ultimate edge, only served to make her more hysterical, as she cried out for him to stop in unmitigated terror. He had found her immobilizing fear highly entertaining and had continued to provoke her, kissing her slowly as he inched further and further from her lips and closer to the black lace edge of her strapless bra, as she sobbed pleading for him to stop. When she had become so hysterical she was convinced she was hyperventilating, she had shouted out in anger that she truly hated him with ever fiber of her being.

Upon hearing her outburst, he no longer found the situation so humorous. Releasing his grip from her wrists, he had wrapped his ice cold hands around her neck, squeezing until she could feel her heart pounding in her ears as the blood rushed to her head. And as she watched the world close in around her, he hissed bitterly in her ear, "I swear to you I will show you what it feels like to not be able to breathe. I will take the last breath from your lips if you ever say that to me again. Make no mistake about this Michaela. I can and I will take your life if you make me."

Then, releasing his hold on her and allowing her head to crash back onto the mattress as she gasped and choked for air, he looked on in amusement anxious to see how she would respond the second she was able to breath regularly once again. Bringing her hand up gently to her neck where his hands had been seconds ago she had replied in anger, "I don't care what you do to me David. Kill me if you want to. I'm never going to give into you willingly, ever."

He had stared back at her completely astonished by the words that had so freely left her lips with no hint of fear, only stubborn defiance. She had looked on as that astonishment in his eyes quickly shifted back to domination. "Well let me put it this way…" he had started a sly grin gracing his face. "If you don't do exactly as I tell you, I'll make sure that stupid blond-haired brat never takes another breath again…"

Her eyes had grown wide instantly the second he said those words as the cold terror coursed through her veins. "Brian?" she questioned softly thinking of her pledge sister's sweet little brother David had met just that morning.

"You know how easy that would be? Step up behind him and twist that little neck, and he's done for in two seconds flat. Could you live with yourself knowing it was your fault? If anything happens to him his death will be on your hands. And make no mistake about it Michaela if you say a word to anyone, if you continue to disobey me, I will do what I have to…" he sneered maliciously.

She had looked back at him in complete awe for several moments almost unable to comprehend his words. Though she wished he was merely spouting off and truly wasn't capable of such an act, she knew that wasn't true. She had seen him take the life of another living thing… She had watched as he had viciously killed that defenseless animal with his bare hands… Her body had visibly shuddered at the memory, and giving her one more menacing glare, he had grabbed her forcefully by the arm and thrown her onto the floor. After smacking her across the face, claiming she deserved it for striking him first, he proceeded to brutally kick her in the ribs until he had stumbled back to the bed and passed out from too much alcohol.

After that night she swore she would never show him that uncontrolled panic ever again for fear of what he would do. He had shown her what he was truly capable of, and she never doubted his words, as the tone in his voice and the hatred in his eyes had lasted long past the bruises he had left.

Now as he pressed her up against the car, she tried to steady her breathing, as she knew he could sense her fear. He seemed to feed off of it, as he watched her chest heave deeply in and out. She tried desperately to remain composed, feeling the tears hiding behind her eyelids threatening to burst forth the second he made his next move.

As he leaned in even closer, he cupped her face gently in his hand. Feeling his warm breath against her cheek, she closed her eyes tightly knowing he would strike out any second. With her eyes clenched closed so tightly it was almost painful, she could hear her own gasping, shaking breathes ring through her ears. Knowing the waves of pain emanating from her wrist were only the beginning, it took everything inside of her not to cry out as the chilling panic ripped her apart.

Tonight he was absolutely livid with her. She's seen it in his eyes numerous times throughout the evening, and the fact that he felt comfortable showing part of his dark side out in the open like this was a very bad sign of what was to come. Swallowing hard, she prayed with everything inside of her that he at least left her alive.

"Open your eyes da** it!" he whispered in her ear bitterly.

Knowing that obeying was the only course of action if she hoped for any amount of mercy at all, she immediately flashed her eyes open. Staring at the cold, unfeeling brown ones before her, she truly wondered how she had ever felt any love for this man at all. That raw hatred of another human being burning in his eyes was the worst sight she had ever seen in her entire life. He obviously was incapable of feeling anything but anger, hate, and lust. Lust that he seemed to confuse with love…

"You really are a sexy bi***. You know that?" he spat out with a malicious laugh.

Biting down on her bottom lip, she willed herself not to say anything back. Any words on her part at all would most likely be considered defiance. Fidgeting slightly underneath him, she asked God, like she did every single time, to stay by her side as this man viciously attacked her.

"What? Not gonna answer me?" he bit back, his tone indicating he was somewhat surprised by her reaction.

Pressing his lips hard against hers, she squeezed her eyes shut as she willed herself not to throw up as he forced his way into her mouth. Every time he kissed her, she felt that same feeling of loathing and revulsion rise from the depths of her heart, wishing she didn't have to ever feel his wet, cold, utterly disgusting lips again. And each time he plunged his tongue deep inside of her, she felt violated all over again. She had always thought she would eventually get over those feelings, as he kissed her like this at least once a day, but it never felt any different.

Lost in thoughts of how much she wished she had the power to stop him, she was completely caught off guard the second he gripped her right thigh. As he forced it outward, she could feel the hot tears leaking from her closed eyes. She wanted to scream 'please, please not again', but she knew it wouldn't make a difference. The more she fought, the harder he punched back. Often she thought she sensed a deeper level of enjoyment from him when she did fight. She wasn't entirely certain if that were true, but she had learned long ago that the less she fought the faster it was over.

As he gripped the material of her skirt tightly in his hand and forced it upward, the white-hot fear was so strong she knew she couldn't contain it much longer. Feeling his fingers sliding underneath her black lace panties was more than she could take, as her mind screamed at her 'You are out in the open on one of the most crowded streets on campus, and you think no one has noticed this? Even if it is two in the morning, someone is bound to see this…' That complete embarrassment of someone watching him assaulting her like this was simply too much to ignore. Knowing she would pay dearly for her actions, she almost resisted the deep urge to violently shove him away, but feeling his fingers violating her in public was something she couldn't stand by and comply with. No, she had to fight back.

As she threw her arms violently against his chest, sputtering a simple 'mmmm!' the very second his lips left hers, he stumbled backward, clearly unprepared for what she had done.

"Not here…" she returned almost timidly as she glanced back into his eyes piercing her with their coldness like a snake's venom.

Glaring back at her with dark hatred he angrily retorted, "You are going to pay for that I hope you know. Just like you're going to pay for embarrassing me in there tonight." Gripping her upper arms so aggressively she gasped in pain, he watched as she bowed her head meekly.

"Look at me Michaela!" he commanded. "Look into the eyes of the man you belong to you **ore!"

Dutifully looking up at him, she knew he could see the tears streaming down her cheeks; the ones she couldn't keep hidden any longer.

"Crying for mercy are we? Well you da** well won't get any here! I just tried to love that disrespect out of you, and you lashed out at me! So you know what that means don't you? I'll just have to smack it out of you!" he yelled spitefully.

Then, releasing one arm from his grasp, he drew back his hand and slapped her across the face so hard she felt her tunnel of vision closing in around her as her cheek stung with throbbing pain. Letting go of her forcefully, he watched as she fell to the ground holding her bright red cheek. After giving her a swift kick in the thigh, he watched as she writhed in pain at his feet. Laughing in malicious amusement, he grinned to himself as he realized how much control he truly had over the Michaela Quinn.

The second his foot collided with her thigh, she knew this was going to be a long and terrible night. She wished more than anything else in the world that someone, anyone, would help her… stop him… But after all this time she knew better. She knew that David was a master at what he did… He knew how to isolate her completely from everyone… No one was going to help her, and it was pointless to hope for some kind of prince to save her… She knew better than to believe in things like that. Fairy-tales with princes coming to the rescue were simply stories to amuse children, nothing more. She was all alone to fend for herself as she had always been, and always would be… However, she knew she had to bite the bullet and endure it, because as David knew she would never allow him to hurt the ones she loved - no matter the cost.

Hearing his laughter ring through her ears, she chided herself once again for letting him drink that much. From the very beginning of the evening, she had tried to stop him from drinking at all, knowing the rest of the evening would be one of the very worst on the chart if she didn't. She had tried every trick in her book from trying to keep him as far from the kitchen as possible, seeking out friends located far from the entrance to the room full of liquor infested countertops, even offering to makeout with him in an upstairs room.

Her mistake had come when she had offered to hold his cup when he greeted a few close friends. He had immediately handed it over to her, and thinking no one would notice, she had attempted to pour out a large portion of it into the trashcan behind his back. Unfortunately, she had forgotten that he watched her like a hawk, and though she was probably only detectable out of the very corner of his eye, he had seen her do it. Initially, he hadn't said anything, as there were too many witnesses around. He had merely poured himself another plastic cup full of liquor and gently led her from the room.

She hadn't even realized he knew until he had forcefully shoved her into the hall closet, closing the door behind them. Pinning her neck against the wooden door with his forearm, she could barely breathe through the force he was exerting on her windpipe as he informed her he had caught onto her plan. Pulling a small pocketknife from his pants, and brushing it against her arm ever so slightly, he had whispered "Da** it Michaela! I swear I'll stab that pretty blond airhead friend of yours with this very knife until she's lying in a pool of her own blood if you don't stop playing games with me!"

Then, declaring that he planned to drink twice as much to make up for her little attempts, he demanded that she drink the very same contents as he did. Even though she couldn't see his eyes through the darkness, she could feel the grave tone in his voice, and she knew that her life, as well as her friend's, was hanging in the balance if she dare push him again that evening.

Though the alcohol intoxication often made his abuse more bearable, she couldn't defend herself nearly half as well as if she hadn't been drinking. Most of the time she didn't do much in the way of defending herself, knowing that would only make his anger worse, and therefore she would suffer more in the end. However, she never let him abuse her in the one way he had tried so so many times. He had done everything around that, but she had never ever let him take her completely, and she vowed that she never would. If she had to give her life to stop him from taking that one smidge of dignity she had left, then that's exactly what she would do, while she held onto hope that one day soon this nightmare would be over. Knowing she would have to fend off his attacks to take the one thing she still hadn't allowed him to have, she had tricked him into believing she was drinking as much as he was.

That part of the evening hadn't been as difficult. When he handed her a drink, she took a sip and walked away with a group of girls quickly tossing it aside before he even knew where she'd gone. When she noticed his drink was empty she would offer to refill it, only adding liquor to his leaving her cup merely containing whatever chaser they were using in the moment. And thankfully rum was clear as was tequila, so handing him a shot, hers merely water, had also worked to her advantage. Though with every drink she handed him, she knew she was only digging her own grave. However, there was no avoiding it tonight, as she had already walked that tightrope of danger once that evening and had fallen. She couldn't risk falling again, knowing he wouldn't let her survive the next time…

She clamped her lips tightly to keep from moaning in pain. It was as if he was determined to literally pound that weakness out of her, and the more she whimpered in pain the harder he hit. Feeling his presence hovering above her like an ominous cloud, she opened one eye ever so slightly knowing he would strike again any second. And before she even had a chance to realize what he was planning, he had jerked her hand away from her face and placed it on the cold pavement below. She tried to retract it, but he was too quick and his foot clamped down on it powerfully, the tread of his boot digging into her flesh.

"So, you thought you could keep me from having fun tonight, huh? Thought you could keep me sober like those da** freshmen up in the dorms? Well you failed Michaela. Just like you fail at everything else you ever attempt. The only thing you have ever succeeded at in your entire pathetic life was seeking me out. You wanted me Michaela, and now you've got me. Well you know what? I'm not going to put up with your little games any longer…" he screamed in hatred as he pressed down harder and harder on her tiny hand below his strong stand.

She cried out in agony, as she felt his weight crushing down on her hand. The sharp, throbbing pain gripped her like a vice, as the intensity only increased by the second. He was going after something that meant more to her than anything else, and they both knew it. She could tell by the shooting pain blazing through her hand that he only needed a bit more pressure to break her entire hand. If he broke her hand, she would flunk out this semester. There was absolutely no way she could dissect anything with only one hand. That was abundantly clear to both parties. He knew what her grades meant to her, and he knew how hard it would be for her to get into medical school if she had to explain a semester of straight F's. Even if it was due to injury, that would be something they would have to let her in the door to explain, and she knew more than likely they would just close it in her face right off the bat.

"David, I'm sorry…" she cried hoping to command his attention. It wasn't too often that she apologized like this to him. It was only in situations so dire she saw no other way to get herself out.

"What was that?" he mocked as he relented a tiny bit of pressure he was afflicting on her hand.

"I'm sorry… You're right. I'm an utter failure in life…" she stammered the words making her sick inside.

"And?" he probed again relenting a large amount of pressure from his stance on her hand.

"And the only thing that makes me successful in life is your…" she returned knowing she would have to add the one word that made this sentence one of the worst things she had ever said.

"My?" he challenged with a nasty gleam in his eye.

"Love…" she spat out, the words tasting bitter upon her lips.

"Say it!" he demanded forcefully, knowing she wouldn't fight him any longer. He had won.

"No…" she mumbled hating the words he wanted to hear almost more than she hated him.

"I'm not going to ask you again! You are begging for my forgiveness here! Don't make me hurt you. I don't want to punish you Michaela, but you are leaving me with no other choice. Remember what happened last time?" he sneered.

Resisting the urge to allow even more tears to gush down her cheeks at the pain he had inflicted upon her that very instant he was referring to, she let out a few chocking sobs knowing he had successfully backed her into a corner once again.

"I love you David!" she cried in the tone of a desperate child begging for pity, rather than a grown woman in love with the man of her dreams.

"So, are you going to let me love you then?" he questioned.

She wanted to scream out 'No! No!' over and over until her voice gave out, but though the pressure was incredibly light at the moment, she knew he would crush her hand without a care in the world.

"Yes…" she returned hating herself more than she had ever thought possible.

"Well, then stop acting like a dirty bi*** and get up off the ground, and I'll take you home…"

She hadn't really seen this complication coming, and though she knew how wrong it was, how much her father would hate her for doing it, and how she would never forgive herself if something happened, she knew she didn't have a choice in the matter.

Seeing she was going to obey his request, he retracted his foot completely and pulled her to her feet. Feeling the tears falling down her face so violently she could hardly see, she tried to hold her hand as steady as possible, though the pain was excruciating. Praying to God it wasn't broken, she climbed into the front seat of the car as he held the door open for her. Making sure her seatbelt was secure, she begged over and over for God to keep them safe on the short ride down the block. She knew he had no business driving, as he had clearly had far far too much to drink. However, she also knew that if she fought him on this she would end up with more than just a broken hand. So, fixing her eyes forward, she watched as carefully as she could for anything she may need to warn him against such as oncoming cars or students walking home from late night parties.

Feeling her hand still throbbing in pain as they drove down the deserted street, she knew it deeply wrong to wish this, but a big part of her felt like it would be wonderful if they were to get in an accident right about now. She would most likely be killed, as would David considering he wasn't wearing his seatbelt. She would never have to worry about him hurting her or the ones she loved again…. She would finally be free from his hold forever… Resisting the urge to reach over and jerk the steering wheel, knowing she could injury not only herself and David but other innocent parties as well, she took a deep breath and tried to gain control. With every fiber of her being she hoped against all odds that he told her goodnight quickly and left her free until the morning. Looking down at her small delicate, silver watch she knew that even if he left her alone in a few minutes that would mean only six hours free from his torment… But it was six hours more than she had at the moment, and she never took any second away from David for granted.