Lambo was accustomed to making late-night dinners.
After all, Reborn was the advisor of the Vongola family and Colonello worked for the COMSUBIN in mafia land; neither of them ever came home any earlier than 11 at night, if they were lucky. At latest, they didn't come home for weeks.
Tonight was one of the extremely, unusually lucky nights where Lambo would have to have dinner ready at 9:30 sharp. Unless something unexpected happened, both of his lovers would be back at or around that time.
He had steak pizzaiola, garlic bruschetta, and cannelloni going, pies roasting in the oven as he cooked.
At exactly 9:29, the food was set out. There was a glass of orange juice at Colonello's plate, a cup of coffee (with hemlock) at Reborn's plate, and a tall glass of milk at his own.
Really, he thought to himself with pride as he set the pies down in the fridge to cool, his lovers were only too lucky to have him.
At 9:30 on the dot, just seconds after praising himself, a man came wordlessly into the room, completely ignoring him as he took his place at the yellow plate.
The only thing that stopped Lambo from getting pissed at the fact that he hadn't even gotten anything such as a 'hello', 'I'm home', or even 'thanks for dinner', was the fact that he wasn't looking at Reborn.
"Colonello…?" He frowned at the blonde continued to ignore him, eating from Reborn's plate as if it was only natural and drinking the coffee in a gentlemanly fashion unlike Colonello's distinct nature of eating as if he was dying of malnutrition.
Colonello occasionally drank coffee, but only if he had something to stay up late, or get up early, for. Even exhausted, he still didn't act so silent, though.
"Hey, Colonello!" He felt an uncomfortable familiarity in the situation.
Why did he feel as if he was looking at Reborn?
"Hey, you stingy bastard, I'm talking to you!" He did something he never would have done to Colonello; he picked up the salt shaker behind him and threw it with all his might at the man's head.
Lifting the fork he had been using, the salt shaker was launched right back at Lambo, catching him directly in the center of his forehead and knocking him to the ground.
He couldn't even be bothered to cry. He just sat up, stared at the man, and tried to figure out what to say.
"G-Goodness…" He uttered at last. "… What happened, Reborn?"
He was finally recognized by the blonde, his icy blue eyes boring into Lambo with overly-familiar annoyance/carelessness.
"Verde happened." His stony expression did little to hide the venom in his tone.
"… Oh…"
"Did you honestly think I would overlook the hemlock?" Colonello – no, Reborn – had his coffee cup in hand and was staring into its depths. "Make me a fresh cup." He held out the cup, clearly demanding obedience.
"Make it yourself, you selfish asshole!"
Before Colonello – Reborn – could retaliate, the apartment door slammed open and shut.
"Hey, I'm home!"
Reborn – no, Colonello – stepped into the kitchen, Reborn's Armani jacket tied thoughtlessly around his waist, his yellow vest sleeves rolled up to his elbows, and the black tie wound around his head, most likely in placement of the bandana he was so familiar with wearing in his own body.
Reborn (yes, he finally got it right) was wearing his infamous poker face; nonetheless, Lambo could feel his disgust.
Lambo felt himself melt inside, completely contrary to the fires or outrage Reborn always lit in him. "Welcome home, Colonello…"
"Hey, so you do know what's going on?"
He sighed. "Well, somewhat…" He glared at Reborn. "He didn't tell me much; only that Verde had something to do with it."
"Yeah." Colonello agreed, taking his place at the blue plate. "He was being a complete ass! Hey, calf." Colonello threw an inelegant arm over the back of his seat.
Lambo could only gawk at the sight; even knowing that it was Colonello instead of Reborn… it was still hard to see Reborn's body in such a state – so completely disheveled and crass.
"Yeah?"
Colonello made the 'come hither' gesture.
Lambo jerked himself towards the raven-haired man, slipping naturally into his lap when Colonello tugged him closer.
It was only when he was sitting down that he began to feel uncertain of himself.
For one, Colonello was right behind him… and yet right in front of him. For another, he was sitting on Reborn's lap with Reborn watching on with doubtless annoyance.
It was confusing.
Colonello pulled his plate from his own seat and placed it next to his own.
"Hey, I'll feed you and you'll feed me, kay?"
"Okay…"
It wasn't unusual, really… They had done it before and Reborn had always ignored them while they did so.
However, there was something to be said when he was technically feeding Reborn while Reborn completely ignored them.
He was staring at the callous hitman while he fed Colonello; it was odd to feel that obsidian glare have the same affect on him as Colonello's original icy blue stare – that shiver was running up and down his back and his fingers were itching to delve into those jet black tresses.
Colonello caught the fork that had been aimed for his head, cutting a curt glare at Reborn.
"Don't do that while you're in my body." Reborn sniped. "It's disgusting."
Then again, it was also extremely weird to feel the magma-hot rage and hatred he only felt for Reborn bubble in his belly as he glared at Colonello's body – more directly, he stared into those icy blue eyes that were glaring past him into glowering obsidian eyes.
"Well, goodness… I'm sorry that the ever so great bastard is offended by something as simple as eating!"
"Hey, he's got a point." Colonello offered a lopsided smirk that made Lambo's heart summersault; he had seen Reborn's smirks plenty of times, but seeing Colonello's smirk on Reborn's face…
His face heated up and he shifted uncomfortably.
Colonello, of course, felt it. Reborn, of course, noticed it.
Both pairs of eyes were consequently drawn to him.
Slowly, smirks grew on both opposing features.
"Hey, I think he likes this." As if to prove his point, Colonello dropped a hand between Lambo's thighs and gripped his growing hard-on without any warning.
Lambo yelped and then whimpered. It was Reborn's hand… and Colonello's technique.
His tongue swiped over his lips as he leaned back into his chest and let himself gasp as pleasure coiled in his loins.
Reborn came around the table and undid Lambo's shirt.
"Goodness, n-no one invited y-you…" Lambo whimpered as a deft hand pinched his nipples.
Colonello's face… Reborn's cruelty.
His thoughts were quickly swirling towards insanity.
"C-Colone-ello…" He whimpered, one hand snaking behind himself to wrap around the raven's shoulders as Colonello suckled at his throat. "R-Reborn…" His other hand tangled in golden blonde locks.
Someone – he was thinking Colonello because Reborn would never be so impish; and yet, he couldn't remember seeing Colonello move – swept the food from the table in one quick swipe.
Before he could even register that the floor was now slick with food, his bare back met the warm table surface – heated by the former dinner plates – and his shirt splattered against the cast aside steak pizzaiola.
Someone grabbed his pants and tore them off his legs – the act could have been accomplished by either of the two.
He stared up at them, familiar faces with flipped expressions, naked as the day he was born.
Damn him for choosing that day of all days not to wear underwear…
Reborn, always a man to savor, started at his left ankle and (licked, kissed, sucked, bit, nipped, nuzzled, tickled) worked his way up with utter patience to his knee, to his waist, to his belly button (yes, skipping entirely his rising problem), and upwards.
Colonello, always so straightforward, skipped the foreplay without a sound and lifted Lambo's hips off the table, his head ducking between his thighs, and his tongue – oh, goodness, goodness, goodness, goodness, goodness…
Goodness, goodness, goodness, goodness…
Goooooooodness… Goodnessssssssssss…
His tongue did wonderfully sinful things and Lambo wasn't certain whether to scream out Reborn's name or Colonello's as that deft muscle went about its duty.
He settled for making incoherent whimpering sounds that bordered on a wail.
Reborn was pinching and rubbing his nipples, turning them into rosy pebbles that rested painfully on Lambo's chest.
Colonello's head was bobbing further down his body, making Lambo's vision fuzzy and uncertain.
And while his body was on fire, his thoughts were in turmoil; because Reborn wasn't one for giving head to his two other male lovers and Colonello was an impatient lover who liked to make it hurt – just a little – for everyone.
It was Reborn's mouth around his cock, Reborn's obsidian eyes glued on his face as his orifice suckled and licked along his length until he was painfully hard.
It was Colonello's lips at his nipples, his icy blue eyes also watching Lambo. His one hand was stroking his one ass cheek, his rough fingertips padding teasingly over the round flesh.
He shut his eyes and gave himself away to pleasure, wordlessly admitting to himself that looking at them and trying to connect features to actions was only going to confuse him in the end.
When Colonello tongued his entrance and Reborn slid his cock down his throat, Lambo pretended that it was Reborn's cock – as in the body – choking him and Colonello's tongue – as in the body – invading him.
He pretended and pretended and pretended…
It became hard to pretend when Reborn was still jacking off in his mouth and Colonello was balls-deep in his body.
It was just as hard to pretend when the two men switched places.
And it was near impossible to pretend when they decided that 2 in 1 was a wonderful thing.
"AAAAAH! R-REBORN! C-C-COLON-NN-ELLO-OOOO!"
It was extremely hard.
Five in the morning the next day (or maybe the same day… Lambo couldn't exactly remember if they fell asleep before or after midnight), Lambo was happy to note that Colonello – the body – had his arms wrapped tightly around his waist and that Reborn – the body – had his head resting on Lambo's belly. Just the way it should be…
He was so marvelously happy…
"You both are such assholes! I'm only one man, can't you two screw each other over once in a while? If neither of you wake up in the next 10 seconds, I'm blowing this place up!... Goodness, fine! If that's how you want to be!" … BOOOM!
He kind of forgot to feel happy.
Author's Note: … The truth? … Not a clue.