Disclaimer: this is a made up story which is a sort of spin-off of the 'Twilight' series, of which I own no rights at all.

Author's Note: Some time ago, I rather rashly implied that I would write stories about zombie fun and games in the morgue, and Carlisle getting into trouble with Esme, so this is my attempt to settle those. I also thought it might be fun to even up Jasper and Edward a little bit. Enjoy!

Warning: later chapters will contain discipline scenes.

It started with a water fight.

Carlisle was in his office, reading, when he heard the unmistakeable sound of laughing vampires. He opened his window and looked out into the yard. The yard was drenched, it looked as though someone was trying to build a swimming pool, skipping that tiresome digging stage and just starting to fill the ground with water.

Edward was at the other side of the yard, his shirt was dotted with droplets of water, but apart from that he was suspiciously dry. It was his laughter that had attracted Carlisle's attention. Edward didn't used to laugh this much, but, since he'd married Bella, he'd started laughing a lot. Right now, he seemed to be amused by the sight of his sisters.

Carlisle could see them at the edge of the forest, dripping wet, with a child's paddling pool at their feet. It didn't take a genius to guess that they'd been the victims of some sort of prank.

Whether he'd actually set the prank up or not, Edward was obviously very happy about the results. He was laughing loudly enough to wake the dead (even those dead who were already engrossed in a medical journal). He should be glad to see his first and youngest son so happy, Carlisle thought, so what was this wistful ache that he was feeling?

He was glad to hear Edward laugh, but he was sorry that it had taken so long for him to learn what Edward's laugh sounded like. When it had just been the two of them, they'd had plenty of good times, but he didn't remember Edward ever being so enthusiastically happy. He wished that Edward had been this kind of brother back when they'd been alone together, back when he thought of Carlisle as his brother.

Edward must have heard his thoughts, he should have been more careful. The mind-reader looked up at the window, trying to decide if he ought to abandon the fun and games in order to talk to his friend.

Then Edward was distracted by a sudden attack from behind. Jasper and Emmett had somehow found themselves a power-hose and turned it on their brother.

Edward leapt out of the way, finally as wet as the rest of his siblings.

"That wasn't fair," he announced, "Carlisle distracted me."

"He didn't say anything," Bella laughed, falling out of a tree and landing next to her husband.

"He was thinking."

"In that case, it's perfectly fair," Jasper responded, "you used your gift to escape most of our fantastic plans, and then it backfired and distracted you. Don't feel bad, little brother, we were bound to win in the end."

"Only because you weren't going to allow the game to finish until Edward was soaked," Alice replied, strolling over with Rosalie. The games had sent them all running off in different directions, but seeing Edward get surprised was enough to gather everyone back together.

"Who says they're over?" Emmett replied gleefully turning the hose on his sister, or at least attempting to. Alice stepped neatly out of the way.

"You'll have to do better than that," Alice giggled.

"Hmm . . . maybe I need a bigger team. Do you want to play, Carlisle? Teams are informal, but my aim is to get Edward wetter than me!"

"Of course Carlisle doesn't want to play," Rosalie scolded, "he's far too mature for a water fight."

"Yes, I think that I'll leave you kids to it," Carlisle answered smoothly, pulling his window closed and returning to the dry safety of his study. His thoughts and his feelings can't have matched his words though, because both Edward and Jasper looked up curiously.

Alice, on the other hand, suddenly burst into a fit of giggles.

"What was that, I didn't catch it?"

"No peaking, Edward, you'll just have to watch this one play out in real time. Bella, you're with me and Rose, let's play girls destroying boys."

The sisters held hands and ran off into the woods to plan their campaign.

Carlisle continued to hear periodic bursts of laughter and occasional screams of surprise for the next hour or so. After his earlier self-pity he wasn't surprised when one of his sons (having dried off and changed his clothes, thankfully) came in for a chat once the game was over. He was a little surprised to see which son it was.

"Emmett? What can I do for you?"

"I'm not sure, Carlisle. I may be way out here, but I think I might have a really great idea."

"Oh, yes?"

"You're not actually that much older than any of us. If you're too old for water fights, then we should be too."

"Hmm."

Emmett grinned, "and I know that we are not too old for water fights. So I figure that you know that you're not either."

"I thought, seeing how dry you are, that the water fight was over. I don't think that I've ever seen you dry more than thirty seconds into a water fight."

Emmett frowned theatrically. "Edward cheats," he confided, "but we let him get away with it because he's the littlest."

"Isn't that Alice?"

"I mean that he's the littlest boy, of course. Anyway, you are right, the water fight is over. You could start another one. I bet Edward would never expect you to throw a bucket of water over his head. My idea was a bit different, though it will be just as much fun."