These characters belong to Janet I am just borrowing them for my amusement. Although I would love to keep Ranger and the merry men for myself!

This story does contain violence, and touches on dark subject matters. This story is not friendly to Morelli or Helen Plum so for Cupcake fans you have been warned.

This is my first attempt at fanfiction so I hope you all enjoy this story.

Chapter 1: Introductions

SPOV

I guess I should start this story by introducing myself. My name is Stephanie Plum, however you may know me as one of my many other names. I am Trenton's own Bombshell Bounty hunter but my friends call me Steph, Skinny Ass White Girl, Bombshell, Bomber, Little Girl, and Beautiful. My other names come from the two men in my life Cupcake which I despise, but maybe that is more because of who calls me that than the actual name because after all I do love cupcakes. Sorry but I got off track blame it on the sugar, Joe Morelli calls me Cupcake he is my on again and off again boyfriend. We are currently in an off stage and this time it is final. Finally there is Babe now that one word makes me shiver with excitement and delight. Is it possible to have an orgasm just hearing a word? If so, Babe does it for me! Again I am sure it isn't the word, it is the person who calls me that, Ranger, also known as Ricardo Carlos Manoso but everyone just calls him Ranger but to me he is known as Batman, and he is a Cuban sex god. Yep just hearing him call me babe makes my breath catch, my pulse spike, and sends shivers of heat to my core. I am also in love with him, but he doesn't know that yet. So please keep my secret!

Currently I am in my new to me SUV, a bright red 2006 Ford Explorer heading to my recently new full time job at Rangeman where I currently run searches, watch monitors, train so I can do more field work, distraction work, and on occasions pull surveillance duty. I still do a little bounty hunting with Lula as her partner when she needs backup. I have been working for Rangeman about 2 weeks now and I can say that it is still difficult getting up at 7:00 a.m. so I can be in the office on time. I mean really who the hell wakes up this time in the morning? Anyway I do love my job, so I make the effort to be on time, and do the best job I can do. I don't want to embarrass Ranger, my merry men friends, or negatively impact Rangeman by my working there. I am still a little nervous working here. At first I was terrified of working here I was so certain that I would screw something up, or damage Ranger's men but slowly but surely those fears are subsiding and I am starting to really feel good about myself, my job, and the friends that I now have. Working here has allowed me to get to know the guys better. Not that I expect to know everything about them like I know about my best friend Mary Lou because they aren't real open but I have gotten to know them better and I love them all. They watch over me, they protect me, they spend time with me outside of work, and they are even training me.

Of all the guys Lester Santos is my closest friend, I would say that we are like best friends he is sort of like the brother that I never had. He is the town jester of Rangeman. If a prank was pulled on one of the guys, or if there is laughter around you can bet that Santos is in the middle of it. He is also the most forward with me even if it means that he gets called to the mats by Ranger. Sometimes I think he just enjoys pulling that tiger's tail other times I think he is half crazy, so I haven't really made up my mind on that one. Tank and Bobby are the next on the list of closest friends at Rangeman they truly are big brothers to me. Tank is well built like a Tank big, broad, balled head make you pee your pants with just one look, never want to meet in a dark alley, and never want them pissed at you kind of guy. Not that all the men at Rangeman aren't a force to reckon with because they are all big, strong, and extremely lethal guys but Tank is just bigger than the rest of them. To me he is just a big ole softie but if you repeat that I will deny it and lie my ass off. Bobby on the other hand is the healer of the group he is the medic of Rangeman and he is here to patch us up. Well he seems to patch me up more than any of the other guys but he is gentler than many of the other guys he just has hands that heal I really don't know what else to say. Ranger, Tank, Lester, and Bobby make up the core team at Rangeman. These are the guys that Ranger trusts the most so I too trust them the most.

There are other guys that I am close with at Rangeman that I enjoy spending time with and talking with when I can get them to talk. Mostly they just listen to me talk and every now and then a get a grunt or a nod out of them. On occasions I get them to talk. Cal he is one of my favorite merry men, that's what I call the guys of Rangeman, Merry men. Probably if anyone else called them that they would be shipped to a third world country with only the clothes on their back and a toothpick but they allow me to call them that.

Cal he is huge and he is intimidating with a flaming skull tattooed in the middle of his forehead. He calls me Angel I guess I should add that to my list of names friends call me. One of these days I am going to ask him why he calls me that because by my definition of Angel I am so not an Angel. Maybe I should tell him one day if I am an angel then my halo is definitely sitting crooked because of my horns. Even though the tattoo makes him look fearsome I love it! Whenever we are assigned together or are about to go on a takedown, distraction, or even surveillance jobs I don't go before I rub his tattoo and give it a good luck kiss. So far this strategy has worked for us and neither of us is looking to change that. I just need to test this theory when we play a game of pool with the guys and then it will be Atlantic City here we come!

Ram is another one of the guys that I am close with. Ram is trying to teach me to love my gun. Well I don't know if he will ever actually get me to love my gun but he has made me a much better shot even in the short time that I have been working with him. At least now I can keep my eyes open and fire my weapon. He says I am a natural I am not exactly sure what that means but he seems to really get excited when it comes times for my lessons. One of these days I am going to ask him those questions and only hope I get an answer out of him other than a grunt or a nod which is his usual response.

With all the training I am doing you would think that I would be put in ESP course but I have yet to see that course offered by anyone but I figure it must be offered somewhere because all of the guys of Rangeman know it. I am the only one that doesn't seem to understand ESP. Speaking of training Hector is the go to guy for electronics, and B&E I may now be able to break in my own apartment when I lock myself out, Yeah ME! Ranger was really reluctant to let me work with Hector at first. I must admit I was a little reluctant myself as Hector scared the shit out of me. He wasn't the biggest of the Rangeman crew actually he is the smallest, but in some instances I think he is the most feared even by Ranger if it is possible for Ranger to fear anything or anyone. Hector has gang tattoos over most of his body and if that wasn't enough to scare the shit out of most men his three tear drop tattoos on his cheek would. Hector calls me angelito (Little Angel) and has dub himself guarda de los 'angelito (guardian of the little angel) one of these days I am going to find out what that means. My understanding of Spanish ends with the Taco Bell menu. I really need to learn Spanish. But since his declaration Ranger has been more open to us working together and in working with him I have discovered what a wonderful man Hector really is and it is my honor to consider him a close friend. Hector even allowed me in on one of his biggest secrets but I am not sure I should share it here as I am not certain what would happen to me if I told it. I think that being sent to a third world country would be a blessing compared to what Hector may do to me if I spill the beans on one of his biggest secrets that even most of the guys don't know. So needless to say his secret is safe with me!

Hal and I have had a rocky relationship ever since I asked him to see his stun gun and then proceeded to stun him. While that happened in the past and he says he has forgiven me sometimes I think he is still really nervous around me. I really feel bad, I know the guys still give him a hard time about that and I know that Ranger made him go thru additional weapon training to learn never had your weapons over to the enemy. Personally I think that was a little much I wasn't his enemy Hal is a Halosaurus he could pick me up and snap me like a toothpick but according to Ranger Hal should have never under estimated his opponent so he had to learn a lesson the hard way and the hard was additional training. Hal says he harbors no hard feelings and I believe him but I am not certain he is totally comfortable around me as he usually has one of the other guys for backup whenever I am around. But regardless I really like Hal and I do feel bad about stunning him, but it was either me or him and I really had to get out to go to Valerie's shower or there would have been hell to pay with mom.

That brings me to the subject of my family. What is there to say really…well I guess lots considering my grandmother Mazur is one for the books. She is a little eccentric seen as she is in her 70's visits funeral homes to see dead bodies, and is probably getting more action these days than I am. However, she is one of my biggest supporters and has always tried to allow me to fly. Without her I would have caved to my mother's demands years ago. My dad is silent for the most part. I know he loves me in his own way but he has never once stood up to my mom for me. I am not certain why and truthfully I really don't want to think about it too long. I just accept that he loves me.

Uggg…speaking of my mom what is there to tell? I have been a constant disappointment to her I believe since the day I was born. Ever since I was 6 and went into that garage with Joe under the ruse of playing choo choo I have heard "why me, Carol Lumpski's daughter doesn't go in garage's with boys and play games". Then I jumped off of the roof of my parent's garage trying to fly and for a few seconds I did fly that is until gravity took over and I landed on the pavement breaking my arm which only earned me another "why me" from my mother. It also earned me dance lessons, home EC lessons, and burg etiquette course taught by mother, yeah me! Well the dance lessons ended once I had managed to break all of my partners In one way or the other. The instructor finally refused to allow me in class, earning me another "why me". Home EC class ended when I set the oven on fire and managed to mess up boiling water again another "Why Me" from my mom. Mom finally gave up on the etiquette lessons stating that there was no way she could make a silk purse out of a sows ear I am not exactly sure what that meant at the time but looking back I just think that she meant that I am a classic fuck up. I managed to make her happy one time in my life and that was when I married the Dick. She was so happy that I was marrying a lawyer she didn't care about anything else, including my happiness. She just wanted me married and I believe out of her hair. I think she thought I would settle down and stay at home tending to my husband's "needs". Well he had other ideas and before the ink was dry on our marriage certificate I came home one day to find him fucking Joyce Barnhardt, my arch nemesis since the 1st grade. Needless to say my mom managed to make it all my fault by stating that had I stayed at home and took care of his needs he wouldn't have felt the need to cheat again another "why me". She even went as far to say that I disgraced the family name by divorcing him that as a woman from the burg I should just stand by my man and work harder to give him what he needed and just overlook certain indiscretions on his part. Now just harps me whenever I go over for dinner that I am not getting any younger and that I need to get married and have children before it is too late, and before Morelli decides to stop waiting for me as he is my last chance, my only chance for happiness. I have been avoiding her the past month since I broke it off with Joe because I don't want to hear how I have thrown away my last chance at happiness. If he is my last chance at happiness well I will just have to roam the world as a disgruntled, wronged woman on the edge because I don't believe I could forgive him and I would never forget what he did. That day is burned into my brain with images that are just as lasting as if I had taken pictures.