Author's Note: Yo. This chapter took me waaaayyyy too long to actually finish. I've been doing it bit by bit, changing my mind, redoing it, starting again and then changing it again. It was pretty frustrating at one point since I couldn't decide what I wanted to write at all. But then I had a eureka moment and voila! You have this chapter! I hope it didn't end up too ugly or disappointing so if you could leave me a review. I would be eternally grateful. :D

Title: A Tale of Timeless Love

Rating: T

Disclaimer: Nope, I don't. :))

-OoO-

Chapter 16 A Touch of Warmth in the Darkness

Fatigue was beginning to catch up with Amu when they had gone beyond twenty stalls already. Tadase and Yaya did not seem to tire of walking from one place to another. The excitement, she believed, was more than enough to fuel the two of them. Since she herself lacked that very enthusiasm, she only had her dutifulness to spur herself on. Amu was aware that it was an inadequate force to repel her weariness.

While exploring the contents of the stall Tadase has chosen, Amu had caught sight of a small bracelet the color of her younger sister's eyes. The bracelet was very much like it, even the way it sparkled when light hit the small blue jewels. Ami's voice rang out in her mind and a sudden memory jostled out of its neat place.

"Onee-chan! Let's go to the festival together!"

Ami would always ask her every year, without fail, to accompany her to the festival. This was the first time she had not heard Ami's ever insistent request. It was also the first time she had no need to gently reject it. The number of times Amu had rejected her offer had not deterred her sister from dutifully requesting her presence every year.

And now she was here – but without her sister. It made her almost wish that she could be with Ami at this point in time. Ami would have been so happy if Amu had just said 'okay' just once, but she had denied that joy to her only sister. She decided then, that the next time she had a chance to go to the Festival, she would explore it together with purchased the bracelet of course, wanting to give it to her sister as a present the next time they would meet.

She kept both Yaya and Tadase within her periphery as she continued to observe the people passing by the stalls. Old and young passed by her without a single glance, focusing on the sights the festival offered them. She watched children together with their parents walking past her with laughter following behind them. Dealing with children was something she had yet to master; they made her uncomfortable, so to say – but to see them laughing without a care in the world made her think fondly of them, if only for a moment.

She watched a happy couple go by with their hands intertwined as they walked. It stirred an unwanted memory of the time Ikuto had held her hand some time had done well enough to hide their hands in the folds of their robes – but their physical contact had been painfully obvious to her. The calluses from holding a pen far too long for comfort did not escape her notice. It became clear to her then just how much work he went through all the time. Almost, or probably even more than the workload they gave her daily.

And yet Ikuto never looked drained at all – he always seemed as calm and serene as the ocean. Even though she had never been to the ocean, from the pictures she had seen before – Ikuto gave off the same aura.

It was impossible for him not to feel tired; she knew that better than anyone. You could resist it, but in the end all of it just accumulates and eventually spills over once you've reached your limit. Where there times when he had pushed himself unnecessarily? She would not really know since their acquaintanceship had only begun a few months ago.

She scrutinized the passers-by once more, trying to picture how Ikuto would look, moving through these streets. He had never attended a Festival since he was born; it was a privilege that was kept from him – a privilege which she had rejected so many times. It made her wonder if Ikuto had ever felt the desire to see the festival himself. Being all alone in the Palace did not sound like a bad idea to Amu – but she knew that loneliness never had any hold on her, she was incapable of feeling lonely.

She felt someone tug her sleeve and she turned to fin Yaya looking at her inquisitively. "Ame-chan?" Tadase was not far behind her with an expression mirroring Yaya's.

She waved away their queries with a slight inclination of her head. "Where shall we proceed next?" She glanced at the sky briefly. "I believe we have enough time for at most three stalls, depending on the amount of time we spend at each stall," she added in a slightly offhand tone, showing that their use of time was to their discretion.

"Then we'll go to the stall you want to go to, Ame-chan," Yaya replied brightly with a curious glint in her eyes. Amu could easily tell her motives; Yaya was most likely interested in discovering her hobbies.

"Yes, let us do that." Tadase seconded with a smile.

Amu was about to reply that she was not particularly interested in any stall when an idea popped into her mind. There was something she wanted to get, however.

"Would it be much trouble to search for a herbal plant stall?" She asked and both of them nodded swiftly.

"So Ame-chan actually is interested in herbs," Yaya mentioned as they began to search.

'Not particularly,' Amu replied mentally, 'but there are some things I need there.'

"A tad, I suppose," she replied vaguely.

All the while, Amu was only slightly aware that Tadase was watching her every action and reply intently. She did not know why he was scrutinizing her but she had no right to rebuke him for it.

After a while, Amu trailed behind to walk beside Tadase. They walked in silence for a few minutes before Tadase spoke. "I did not expect you to indulge our wishes so readily." His voice held a curious note in it. Amu acknowledged his point. "I presumed you would insist that your wants would not be important, that we should just proceed according to our own interests." He added, giving her a sideways look as he spoke.

He had accurately noted the abrupt change in her normal behaviour and Amu applauded his observatory skills. "Do herbs truly interest you that much? Enough to overcome your strong principles?" This time he was looking at her directly, the request for an answer plain in his amber orbs.

"No," Amu answered truthfully this time – she knew she could not lie to Tadase, royalty have been trained by experience to see through deceit and trickery. "There are things I need there to make something. I thought if I could find a stall that had all the herbs I need, I could make it as soon as possible."

"Are you in such a hurry to make it?"

"Somewhat," she answered a tad hesitantly. Amu knew it wasn't a lie but she felt awkward saying it aloud like that. Even she could hear the uncertainty her voice. "The person I'm giving it to might be in need of it." She added more surely.

Tadase stared at her for a moment then chuckled. "Of course it was something like that." He whispered under his breath. "I was wondering why you were acting strange. But in the end, Ame-san will be Ame-san, no matter what situation."

"Please elaborate," Amu entreated, slightly befuddled by his words. Tadase gave another smile before replying.

"You always think of others before yourself, just like now, rather than your own interests – you were actually acting for the sake of someone else. I'm amazed how someone could be so utterly selfless like you." He gave her an inquisitive smile, "Have you ever thought of being selfish for once, Ame-san?"

Amu was silenced by his question.

Selfishness.

It wasn't something unfamiliar to her, but how could she ever explain to Tadase? How could she explain that being selfish was an absurd idea when her life had not been hers to begin with? What Tadase dubbed as selflessness was only Amu denying herself the things that were not meant for her. Pleasure, happiness, freedom – Amu did not think she deserved such things. If she could not live her life for herself, she might as well live this life for the sake of serving others. She wouldn't dare call herself selfless because she knew very well that her way of living was selfishness in the things that life was giving her was selfishness. But it was the only way Amu knew how to live, the only way she could live.

"I have," she conceded and looked back at Tadase, meeting his eyes directly. "But selfishness is something I would be happy to live without."

-OoO-

"Onee-chan, are you okay?" a soft voice addressed her.

A young girl who looked to be five or six years old with curly blonde hair gazed at her from below her hood. Her round blue eyes seemed concerned and curious at the same time. The young girl was wearing a white kimono and she was holding a small paper ball between her two small hands.

Utau gazed beyond the girl and found a lady with dark hair approaching the two of them. She had the instinct to cover her face – but realized that it was impossible for them to have seen any of her performances; only the noble families had ever seen her in person through her performances – and these two certainly did not exude the aura of a noble house.

"What are you doing, Ami-chan?" the lady asked gently, offering Utau a smile as well.

"Mama," the young girl acknowledged, glancing back at the older lady. The young girl called Ami grabbed onto Utau's sleeve once more. "Mama, this Onee-chan looks troubled."

The lady turned her attention to Utau. She scrutinized Utau's faced for a moment. "Are you perhaps… lost?"

On any other occasion, Utau would have asserted that a person such as herself could never be lost – in this situation however, Utau did not have the luxury or the confidence to make such a claim. She pondered whether it would be wise to trust a stranger such as this woman but genuine concern in the lady's eyes erased her doubts.

"Yes," Utau answered after a while with a hint of reluctance. The lady smiled gently as if she was praising her for being honest. "What is your name?"

"Ut – Umi, my name is Umi, miss –?" she caught herself just as she was about to answer her real name and swiftly changed the flow of the conversation to cover it up.

"Midori," the lady with dark hair replied as she adjusted her glasses. "Hinamori Midori. You can call me by my first name." She supplied her full name and Utau's ears pricked up at her family name.

"Hina…mori?" she repeated carefully, the image of a pink-haired girl flitted in her mind for a second.

"Yes," she repeated with a smile. She held the hand of the young blonde girl on her left, "This is my daughter Ami." The young girl beamed back at her. "It's nice to meet you Umi-neechan!" she replied happily.

Ami – it was very close to the name of a certain someone she knew. To have the same family name as her aide and a daughter with a similar name could not be mere coincidence. Utau ultimately decided to ask, if her assumption was wrong she had nothing to lose.

"It's nice to meet you," Utau bowed gracefully and when she raised her head she found Midori looking back at her with a surprised expression. Utau realized her error a tad too late; she had acted as she normally would have in the Palace during a formal introduction. Not many commoners were used to people moving gracefully and Utau realized that her body had moved naturally carrying her typical elegance as her tutor had once called it.

"Before anything else, Midori-san?" Utau acted immediately.

"Yes?"

"Do you know anyone called Hinamori Amu?"

Midori's eyes widened a fraction and Ami suddenly latched onto her robe. "You know Onee-chan?!" she asked excitedly, her eyes burning with expectation. Utau could feel the excitement rolling off the young girl's body at the mere mention of her aide's name.

"Ami-chan," Midori chided, prying Ami's hands from Utau's clothes. After unlatching Ami, Midori addressed her question.

"Yes. I do happen to know her. She's my eldest daughter," she replied with a smile, "How are you acquainted with her?" her answer was calm and composed but the curiosity in her eyes did not escape Utau's notice. Fortunately, Utau had already expected this question and had prepared a proper answer beforehand.

"I work at the Palace as well but I am only acquainted with her by name since it is well known that she is the aide of her Royal Highness the Princess." the reply was perfect in Utau's mind, lacking nothing.

"My Onee-chan is amazing! She's perfect and cool and she can do anything!" Ami said proudly with her hands on her hips and her head held high. Midori offered Utau a rueful smile as she patted her youngest daughter's head.

They emitted a sort of warmth – and it puzzled Utau how her aide was in no way like these two in front of her. Hinamori Amu did not look like her mother but she looked more like her sister. Their attitudes however, contrasted greatly and Utau wondered if Amu took more after her father.

Midori looked back at her and seemed to settle upon something, "It's about time we got you back to where you should be, Umi-chan. We can chat while we walk." Amu's mother held out her hand and Utau held on to it after only a slight hesitation. She wasn't a complete stranger – this lady was a relation of her aide after all.

Utau was surprised by the feel of Midori's hand. Her hand was slightly rough – not at all like the hand of her own mother that she had been used to. Midori's hand was rough – but it was warm. Her mother's hand had always been cool against her skin. Utau wondered if this was the difference between commoner women and the Emperor's consorts; it made her wonder if her hands were the same as her mother – cold, incapable of producing warmth.

If her hands were cold, was she capable of giving warmth to another like this? Or was that a privilege denied to her by her heritage as well?

"Umi-chan?" Midori asked for her attention.

"Yes?" she answered despite her thoughts. She was surprised when she felt a smaller hand hold her other hand by her fingers. Utau turned and found Ami smiling back at her brightly, Utau smiled back on reflex. Ami's hand was warm as well.

"Did you have a companion before you got lost?"

"I did," Utau replied promptly. "He's a young man with messy reddish brown hair and deep green eyes." She added the description, sparing them the need to ask her.

Midori gave a mischievous smile, "Could he be your lover?" she asked directly. Utau felt her face heat up even until her ears.

"N-no! We're not in that sort of relationship!" she denied vehemently with a vigorous shake of her head to emphasize her answer. Midori watched her with an unreadable expression before asking another question.

"Then how are you related?" her question was innocent enough, but Utau felt as if Midori was only asking for the sake of asking. People had done that to her before – simply to gauge her reaction to the question.

Utau paused and carefully selected the most neutral answer.

"We are friends," she answered in her most convincing voice.

"Mm-hmm," Midori responded with a mere hum. It not a response Utau had expected; Utau felt even more bothered by Midori's ambiguous reply.

"Onee-chan, your face is red like a strawberry. Are you okay?" Ami's brows were furrowed as she gazed up at Utau. Utau suddenly felt the urge to cover up her face completely. She couldn't, however, seeing as both her hands were occupied. She settled with lowering her head so her hood could hide her face. She would never admit to being embarrassed – royalty were never embarrassed about anything.

"Which stall did you visit last?" Midori changed the flow of the conversation and Utau felt a flood of relief. She was glad that Amu's mother wasn't as curious as most people in the Royal Palace were.

Maybe this is what Amu inherited from her mother, if not her looks. But Hinamori Amu seemed to be completely devoid of interest in anything that did not have to do with her work. Utau was not sure whether that was an asset or a disadvantage.

"A pottery stall," Utau responded. "It was located between an herbal stall and a furniture stall, if I remember correctly." Utau tried to picture the stall in her mind; she was glad that her memory had something else to offer other than recollections of Kukai's facial expressions.

Midori smiled at the extra information. "That makes things easier – there are only a few herbal stalls during the Festival. If you didn't wander too far from where you were before, I can guess which stall you came from." She gave a reassuring smile and Utau felt her worry ease a little.

Ami held her hand tighter, "If Mama says it'll be okay, then it'll be okay Umi-neechan. We'll help you find your lover!" Utau held back an undignified sputter at the young girl's last words. Midori gave a suppressed giggle at Utau's reaction and Utau felt herself becoming flustered again.

"As I said –" she began to retort when Midori gave her hand a squeeze as well.

"Ami-chan," Midori called her daughter's attention. "We're looking for her friend. Not lover, friend." She emphasized on a single word and Ami slowly digested this new information.

"They're not the same thing, Mama?" she asked innocently, her blue eyes round.

Utau unintentionally let out a bubble of laughter at Ami's question. Midori gave a smile as well when she replied. "No, dear. They are different. I'll tell you what a lover means when you're older."

Ami pouted, "But I want to know now, Mama!" she protested. Midori reached out and patted her daughter's hair. "When you are a little older, Mama promises to tell you. No more complaints or I won't buy your favourite taiyaki."

Ami quickly looked disheartened at the last part of the sentence and seemed to reluctantly let go of her curiosity. "Do you understand, Ami-chan?" Midori asked in a very motherly voice. Ami gave a small nod and Midori gave a loving smile.

"Good girl. As a reward I'll buy you two more taiyaki of different fillings." Ami's brightened up immediately.

"Really, Mama?" she asked excitedly, no doubt she was already thinking about the prospect of choosing more than one flavour of taiyaki.

"Of course!"

Ami smiled in a way that lit up even her blue eyes. It was quite a dazzling smile, Utau thought to herself. Seeing her eyes sparkle like that made Utau think of Amu's dull golden eyes in comparison. If Amu could smile like her sister, Utau was sure her golden eyes would be like twin suns in her face. But she had never seen her aide smile as joyfully as this young girl before her.

What made the two siblings different? Utau wondered. She and Ikuto were quite similar in attitude and demeanor since they grew up in the same environment. Amu had also grown up in the same environment as this young girl – but she did not share much similarity with her. They were more of opposites actually.

As the three of them walked on, Utau became more and more curious about the reason why Amu was the way she was. Strangely enough, she wanted to know more about her aide. Utau decided she would just ask Amu when the two of them were alone – she knew Amu would answer her honestly. She was not the type to lie to anyone, especially to Utau who was her mistress. Only from Amu had Utau ever received, or rather, felt true loyalty – so she was confident Amu would answer what she could.

When the three of them had finally reached the stall, she did not expect to find the very person she was thinking about.

-OoO-

Amu heaved a sigh as she lay down on her futon, staring at the dark ceiling above her. Her room was dark – but the light from outside her window gave her sufficient light to still be able to see herself. She raised her hand to her face, stared at the palm of her hand and covered her eyes.

Amu was almost never taken by surprise by anything. The last time she had been so wholly surprised was probably when she had found out that Ikuto was the First Prince of Seiyo. Before that – Amu could not recall any other instance.

Her meeting with her foster mother and Ami a few hours ago was one of those rare moments.

Amu heaved another sigh – to be seen in such a way was not one she should have allowed.

But it had happened anyway – Amu had no way to anticipate such a meeting.

She heaved another sigh before she sat up and fixed her mess of a hair. She had spent almost two hours simply tossing and turning in her bed. She had remained awake as she remembered snippets from her encounter. Every time she reminisced, she felt a fresh wave of agitation overcome her.

To have been placed in such a situation – Amu felt her jaw clench at the memory.

She felt the need to move her body, to release all the tension contained in her body. She stood up nimbly and moved towards her door. Despite it being late into the night, she decided against bringing an outer robe. She wanted, no, she needed to feel the cold night air. She felt that it would help her clear her head more.

She left her room with only her flimsy sleeping clothes covering her thin but sturdy body. She wouldn't wander too far, and it was far too late into the night for anyone to be awake. She was confident she could evade detection if her assumption was wrong, anyway.

With this frame of mind, Amu thrust herself into the sea of cold air awaiting her outside her room.

The brush of cold air against her exposed skin made her shiver, but she had already mentally prepared herself for it. Her arms were crossed to generate heat for her chest. She felt the warmth she had accumulated in her futon escape to the icy cold floor under the soles of her feet. Amu was aware that the amount of heat her body produced was definitely lower than the amount of heat she was losing – but the coldness numbed her tense muscles and lessened the jittery feeling in her stomach.

Before she exited the hall, she glanced up at the quarter moon amidst the clouds in the sky. She deduced by the position of the moon that almost two hours after midnight. She hoped her assumption before she left her room proved to be correct.

Then she took a deep breath and exited the hall.

-OoO-

It was only for a moment.

Ikuto was sure he had seen for only a moment.

Despite how fatigued he was both mentally and physically – he was quite sure it had not been his imagination.

It had only been by chance that his gaze had wandered to the window for only half a second. To the direction of the Mansion quite a distance from the main building where his office, in which he was still working at this hour, was located.

But he had seen it in that half second.

The flash of pink that had disappeared into the darkness as soon as his mind had registered its appearance. There was still a bit of doubt, however, that his mind had only conjured up that flash of pink because of his desire to see her especially.

He put down his pen with the hope that his sight had not betrayed him – and rushed into the darkness to chase after that flash of pink.

While he dashed, he felt the tie he used to keep his hair up come undone and release his mane completely. The cold night air whipped through not only his robes, but his hair as well. Ikuto stopped in front of the Mansion and searched the surroundings for his object of interest.

He walked stealthily in the direction the flash had disappeared to, watching for any signs of movement – but he didn't need to look far to find her. She was there, standing ever so still in a small patch of moonlight below the canopy of leaves. In the darkness of the cluster of trees, she was standing in the only spot where light shone through.

Like a painting, he thought, as he gazed at her figure from afar. He came closer as quietly as possible, his eyes focused on nothing else. Ikuto could just barely make out her profile; her gaze was focused on something distant in the sky. Her hair was left untied and it was long enough that it reached just below her waist. Her arms hung loosely at her sides and she was clad in white sleeping clothes, similar to what he had worn the first time they had met.

Her skin was pale under the moonlight and her hair almost silver. She looked ethereal and other worldly, looking so luminous despite the darkness surrounding her – it was almost as if she was about to disappear any moment, as if the darkness was about to consume her. He felt the sudden urge to wrap her in his arms to keep her from going anywhere.

Just as he was about to call her name, a gust of wind blew from behind him and rustled his robes. The gust reached her and seemed to rouse her from her daze. Then as if she suddenly realized something, she closed her eyes and faced away from his direction.

After about half a minute, her voice broke the silence. "What are you doing here, Ikuto?" she addressed him. Ikuto felt his breath catch in his throat. Her voice was close to a whisper, but in the quietness of the night he could hear it clearly. But then again, Ikuto felt that he could distinguish her voice in any situation. He knew she had not seen him – how had she identified his presence specifically?

He took a deep breath and replied, "I could ask you the very same question, Amu." He heard her sigh before she turned to face him.

She turned to him with a slightly exasperated expression. It wasn't her expression that disturbed him immediately – it was her eyes. Rather than the golden color he was accustomed to, Amu's eyes looked like endless black pits. He felt his protective instinct take over. This time, he didn't fight the urge and closed the distance between the two of them in few strides.

Not giving her any chance to react. He pulled her small body into his outer robe and wrapped his arms around her together with his robe. Her skin that came into contact with his own was ice cold – he felt anger at her lack of concern for her body.

Despite his anger, it had not escaped his notice that she had not resisted his action. Her body felt so small and fragile in his arms but he held her tighter. He knew she wouldn't break – he knew the strength she had despite her small body. He leaned down and pressed his lips to the top of her head. She still did not struggle as she usually did and it made him feel anxious.

"I…kuto?" her voice was weak. She sounded tired. He felt her warm breath brush his collar bone. He felt her head rise to look at him – but he didn't want her to look at him with those eyes. He raised his left hand and cradled her head against his chest.

"Ikuto?" she repeated, her voice demanded a reply but Ikuto blatantly ignored her. His left hand touched her ear and he felt her flinch slightly. Bit by bit, he could feel the warmth returning to her body. After he had warmed both of her ears with his hand, he decided it was time to face her.

He lifted her chin with his finger and bravely gazed down at her. Stands of his loose hair touched the sides of her face as they regarded each other. Ikuto was glad that her eyes were not as dark as before and he let out a breath he didn't know he was holding.

"I'm sorry," she looked apologetic.

"Why are you apologizing?"

"I seem to have caused you undue worry."

"Do I look worried?" Truthfully, even he did not know what expression he was wearing at this moment.

"Very much so," she said softly. She looked straight into his eyes before she spoke again. "I am alright. There's no need for you to worry, Ikuto. You can let me go now."

At her last words, he felt his jaw clench. "No," he said steadily and her eyes widened a fraction. "I'll never let you go." He was absolutely serious when he uttered the words.

-OoO-

Amu found a nice spot in a cluster of trees nearby. The darkness hid her, but there was an open space above where she could see the sky perfectly. In the darkness, she had once again pondered over the vastness of the sky. Instead of the clear blue, what greeted her was the majesty of the stars dotting the night sky. It was light thousands of small jewels decorating the sky and Amu wondered if there was really any painter who could capture beauty.

When she was a child there had been a painter who visited the Inn during one of the previous Imperial Festivals. The Amu of that time had been close to a babe in mind set – so when the painter had shown her his painting of the night sky, she had been absolutely amazed. Regarding the night sky before her now, she could only wonder who had painted this night sky before her.

Who was it that had created such majesty? Humans could only make cheap imitations which paled in comparison to what stood before her in this moment. Was it some divine creator? Was it Izanagi and Izanami? Or was it perhaps Amaterasu?

But then again, did it really matter? Pondering over it wouldn't give her any answers. Amu knew she was just distracting herself from what was really bothering her. Anything other than that would suffice to distract her.

She didn't want to remember. If she could, she would want to wipe the whole encounter from her memory. Though she knew it was impossible – she wished just for one night… even just for this one night, she fervently wished she would be allowed some peace of mind to recover herself.

A sudden familiar scent had broken her from her reverie. A light scent of milk and mint interlaced with one another pervaded her sense of smell – she had immediately remembered where she had associated that scent. She faced away from the direction of the gust of wind that had brought the scent. She needed to compose herself. Just as she was pondering on how he had located her in this darkness, she noticed the pale luminescence of her skin.

Moonlight.

Of course. She had not even noticed when the moon had escaped the prison of clouds and bathed her in its gentle light. As if it had wanted Ikuto to find her in the darkness. But this light could not free her from the deep darkness that shrouded her past. Ikuto could not find her, the darkness wasn't so easy to dispel – Amu was strangely comforted and relieved by this fact.

She took a deep breath and addressed him, "What are you doing here, Ikuto?"her voice was only barely audible but she was confident he could hear her nonetheless.

"I could ask you the very same question, Amu." He replied a tad breathlessly.

Going with the principles of manner and propriety, talking to another without facing them was rude – so she steeled herself and faced him with a slightly exasperated expression.

He was standing there, his midnight blue hair was let down with its length reaching just above his elbow. He looked flushed, as if he had come running after her. Maybe he had seen her after all as she had left the Mansion. She blinked and realized that her assumption had been wrong – she had not been stealthy enough as well. For him to catch her when she was unprepared may really be fate working against her. His face tightened when their eyes met and she saw something like fear flit across his features.

He closed the distance between them abruptly and enveloped her in his arms. The warmth of his body had surprised her more than the action he had undertaken in this situation. She felt his embrace tighten to a point where it even hurt quite a bit. She felt his face on her head, his warm breath pushing against the strands of her hair.

Amu realized that this was a more advantageous position for her, seeing as how Ikuto was unable to see her face. She pushed back the overwhelming urge to push him away and flee because she knew he would not forgive her easily for it.

"I…kuto?" she tried to raise her head to look at him, but she could only see his neck. Instead on answering her, he cradled her head with his hand and pressed her head against his chest. The warmth of his body prickled against the coldness of her forehead.

"Ikuto?" she repeated, wanting to hear a reply from him. His long fingers brushed against one of her ears and Amu felt herself flinch. His hand enclosed over her ear ad Amu felt the blood rush to her face. She was truly grateful that he could not see her face in this situation. He silently warmed her other ear as well before he finally decided to address her.

He lifted her chin and greeted her with an expression that she had never seen before. His brows were furrowed and his lips were in a taut line. His jaw was clenched and his eyes were full of concern and worry. Seeing him look at her like that made her feel a little weak. Stands of his loose hair tickled the sides of her face as the two of them stared at each other.

"I'm sorry," she apologized on reflex. He had been worried about her. For someone like her to cause him to make such an expression was unforgivable. She did not ever what to see him make that sort of face again.

"Why are you apologizing?" he asked, his expression seeming to soften gradually.

"I seem to have caused you undue worry."

"Do I look worried?" his voice held a glint of surprise. Had he not been aware? Amu thought.

"Very much so," she said softly. She looked straight into his eyes before she spoke again. "I am alright. There's no need for you to worry, Ikuto. You can let me go now." She was glad she could look at him directly despite the embarrassing position they were in.

At her last words, she observed how his jaw clenched. "No," he said firmly, his hold on her body tightening once more. She was about to protest but the next words that left his lips silenced her.

"I'll never let you go." His gaze bore into her.

He pulled her even closer than before, placing her head in the crook of his shoulder. Amu felt his lips press against her ear and she felt as if electricity was rushing from her ears then down her spine.

"Amu," he whispered her name like a prayer. Like a desperate man praying earnestly for something he truly desired.

She felt her face heat up again and it wasn't her imagination that her pulse was quickening. The blood was already pounding in her ears, making her feel dizzy.

"You can rely on me, Amu. I… won't go anywhere. I'll be here always. It's not weakness to rely on someone when you feel like the whole world is against you. I will… always be on your side. When you feel tired, I'll be more than willing to carry you. So you can trust me, Amu." His lasts words were sincere and imploring at the same time.

She felt his hands trembling ever so slightly as he had told her these words.

Before she knew it, hot tears were spilling down her face.

Why?

She didn't understand. No one had ever spoken words like that to her. Was she happy to the point of tears?

...Or was she sad because she knew she could never be allowed such a privilege?

The sound of rushing waters in her ears was deafening and when Amu closed her eyes, she felt her legs buckle beneath her.

Then it was pure darkness.

A darkness as deep as the depths of her heart covered her and pulled her away from Ikuto's warmth.

This was the only place where she could exist.

Don't take this place away from me, Amu pleaded silently. Don't pull me out of this darkness, Ikuto.

-OoO-

Kukai watched in silence from the top of a tree quite a distance from the pair.

"Ne, Kukai. Isn't that Hime-chan's aide?" Daichi asked with interest from his spot on Kukai's shoulder.

"It's her aura alright, it's a little on the dark side now, however." He scrutinized the aura that used to be a clear golden color but was now the color of unpolished metal. Kukai had finally regained some of his powers through Daichi's help. Since he had his special sight again at least, he resumed his night patrol duties in the Royal Palace. Rento had taken over his duties for the time being according to his father's orders and when Kukai had appeared for work, Rento had seemed reluctant and worried as he left.

"And the other one –" Daichi began to say but Kukai finished for him.

" – is the Royal Heir, Tsukiyomi Ikuto-sama." Kukai had seen him many a time during his night patrol – even before the Acquaintance Party and that time with Utau. Kukai was not unaware of his existence. Looking at both of their auras now though, Kukai felt as if they had switched places. The First Prince's aura had always been dark, close to a deep darkness. The only reason Kukai had not subdued him was because the Prince had still kept his sanity despite the state of his aura. There was something that was keeping him from going insane – Kukai had left him like that to discover what it was.

But now his aura was a beautiful deep blue. It was still somewhat cloudy – but definitely in a much better state compared to before. Kukai had tried to trace when his aura had begun to change. It was around spring maybe, when the darkness had begin to dispel. Kukai did not need to take any action against him now; that was one problem off his chest.

"To think they were in that sort of relationship." Daichi pondered aloud.

"I don't believe that to be the case," Kukai said uncertainly as he stared more intently at the pair.

"On what basis do you say that?" Daichi asked curiously.

"Well… I've met Hinamori Amu personally. I've spoken to her and interacted with her. So I have an idea of her personality. She holds steadfast to her principles – and I don't think she would let them go so easily…" his voice trailed off, as if he was searching for the right words to describe Amu.

Daichi waited quietly for him to continue.

"I don't think she would ever allow herself to be in a relationship with one who is of higher status than herself. Her principles would not allow her to."

"But this scene seems to convey the contrary," Daichi interjected returning their attention to the pair who was still in close proximity to one another.

"Not quite. If you remember correctly – the Prince was the one who acted first, and from our point of view we cannot really ascertain if Hinamori-san is reciprocating the action in his robes. It may be that the Prince is the only one holding feelings between the two of them."

"But you forget that it could be the other way around." Daichi added. "The Prince may just be naturally kind."

Kukai doubted that. No man would embrace another woman for no reason. Kukai himself had never felt the urge to do it to any girl – but then he hadn't much experience with girls anyway. Ikuto seemed older and more experienced with handling women... but Kukai knew he wouldn't just hold any girl like he was holding Hinamori Amu right now. The two of them looked very much like lovers from his point of view, Kukai couldn't ignore that fact.

"Or maybe, it could be that both of them hold feelings but one of them refuses to give in to their feelings?" Kukai murmured. "If that was the case, Hinamori-san would likely be the one holding herself back. It would be very true to her character – her sense of duty is greater than anything else. She will not – or rather, she cannot allow herself to give in to her feelings, no matter what they are."

"Hoohhh," Daichi gave a nod then turned to him with a smile, "You two are a lot alike then." He concluded.

Kukai looked at his partner with a baffled expression. "In what way?"

Daichi only laughed in reply. "Not telling," he said mischievously. Kukai let out a sigh and decided not to pursue the matter. It was a pointless struggle trying to force something out of Daichi – Kukai had learned it from years of dealing with the deity.

Staring at Amu and Ikuto together made him wonder if such a relationship was truly possible in real life. Novels he had seen Reiji reading had centered upon such couples – and they had achieved varying endings as far as he could remember. Some died together, others eloped, some were accepted despite their difference in status – but what ending awaited the two of them?

If he was placed in such a situation… he would deny his feelings until the day he died. He didn't want to take such a risk when his duty was of far more importance than his happiness. Reiji would be happy in his place, he had already determined it to be so – Kukai did not need anything else.

As if betraying his inner thoughts, the image of Utau's genuine smile flickered in his mind for a second.

Please, he pleaded in his mind. Grant my wish, Utau.

If she could be happy together with Reiji then Kukai would not ask for anything more.

"Kukai? Are you okay?"

"I'm fine," he dismissed Daichi's question before he turned to look at his partner.

"Are you sure?" his partner repeated, looking slightly worried.

"Yes. Did I look like I was in pain?"

Daichi nodded, he looked a bit annoyed. "Uh-huh. You looked like you were enduring something awful. This is why I told you to just leave your patrolling duties for a while. You're a vegetable right now and still you act all high and mighty as if you could actually do anything if you were in danger." He added the last part sharply.

Kukai gave a rueful smile in reply.

"And you still insist on climbing trees as well. Why do you insist on taking unnecessary risks?" he asked heatedly.

Kukai let out a snort of laughter and steadied himself using the trunk of the tree.

"Why are you laughing?" Daichi asked indignantly, flying off his shoulder to look at him face to face.

Kukai tried to his best to recover his composure before he replied. He took a deep breath before he spoke again, a smile never leaving his face.

"Sorry and thank you, Daichi."

Daichi seemed confused, "For what?"

"For worrying about me." He grinned and Daichi looked flabbergasted. The Guardian Deity decided to just frown and huff in response – but Kukai had not missed the embarrassed air he tried to hide. It brought on another wave of laughter, much to Daichi's chagrin.

-OoO-

Another dream.

Aum stared down at her pleasantly sleeping face. She couldn't remember when this had occurred in the past but Amu was sure of one thing. This was not her memory – it was her own, from her past.

She was standing in her foster parents room gazing down at the four sleeping forms cramped together in in a large futon that was usually meant for only two people. But Amu was in that bed – and so was Ami as well as her foster parents.

She and Ami were sandwiched between Midori-san and Tsumugu-san – sleeping with the most content expressions,

Amu suddenly remembered where this memory was from. It was the first night after Midori-san and Tsumugu-san had taken the two of them in. After bathing both of them and getting them into clean clothes, Midori-san had suggested that the four of them should sleep together for the first night.

This was her first night as Hinamori Amu. This was probably one of her first memories from two years ago.

To see herself wearing that expression, Amu tried to recall what she had felt back then to have made such a face. When she searched through her memory though, she could only remember the feeling of being safe. In the arms of these people – she had felt safe. Maybe that alone was enough to give her peace of mind.

Amu closed her eyes and the next time she opened them, she was already greeted with the familiar ceiling of her room. She glanced out the window – and sat up immediately. She felt woozy for only half a second before she stood up hastily and dressed herself.

It was already midday – she had overslept. It was unforgivable on her part.

She had not even bothered to tie up her hair and decided to do it on the way. She discovered that Utau was not in her quarters and rapidly thought of places where she might be. Just as she was inwardly chastising herself for allowing such a blunder, she bumped into an unlikely person as she exited the hall.

They had bumped into each other quite forcefully and Amu was pushed off balance. She closed her eyes and readied herself for the impact – but it didn't come as quickly as she had assumed. She felt someone gripping her forehand to keep her from falling.

"Mattaku," she heard a familiar voice utter. She raised her eyes to the blue orbs that were looking back at her mischievously.

"I was just about to check up on you, too." He pulled her to her feet with ease. "I can't my eyes off you for a second." He gave a long-suffering sigh. He was skilfully carrying a tray of food with one of his hands while he had pulled her up. She was amazed that he had not managed not to spill any of it despite all the commotion.

Amu finally got her voice to work properly, "What are you doing here, Ikuto?" once the words had left her lips, she felt a sense of déjà vu overwhelm her. She covered her mouth and memories of the evening before flooded into her mind. As her mind processed her memories, she found herself growing more and more embarrassed – it didn't help that her face was growing warm as well.

Ikuto gave a knowing smile. "That's quite a reaction you have there," he said playfully. Without any warning he took her hand and began towing her back in the direction. "I'll explain everything while you eat breakfast. I won't accept any complaints so you should just be obedient." She didn't even have a chance to protest.

Amu bit her lip and instead, did her best to calm her racing heart. She focused on Ikuto's characteristic scent and breathed it in to calm her pulse. When they reached her room, Ikuto entered without any reservations and slid the door shut behind the two of them.

He let go of her hand and set down the tray in his hand on the small table near her bed – which she had forgotten to fix in her haste. She began the process immediately while Ikuto watched her with interest.

"Ah, so even you can be forgetful when you're in a hurry." Ikuto mused. Amu felt mortified but she hid it well in her reply.

"It was an error on my part. It won't happen a second time."

Ikuto sighed, "I'm not criticizing you, Amu." She finished fixing her bed and found Ikuto frowning at her. He gestured to the food laid on the table. "Eat." It was clearly an order and Amu decided it would be pointless to refuse him now.

The food he had brought, however, was a different matter altogether.

"Ikuto." She said in a measured voice.

"Yes?" he responded with a pleasant smile – as if there was nothing wrong.

"These are all snacks." Amu pointed out. She had not seen the contents of the tray when the two of them had collided a few moments before - but it was now all laid bare in front of her.

"Yes. I got you ones that aren't particularly sweet since you don't look like a sweet tooth." He explained happily, a smile never leaving his face.

"Is this… what you usually have for breakfast?" Amu asked carefully, twirling one of the wrapped candies between her fingers.

"Hmm? Yes, except during formal events where they require me to eat a full breakfast course, I usually just have snacks for breakfast." It seemed true enough since he had never joined them whenever the Princess, the Court Head and the Second Prince ate breakfast together.

Amu closed her eyes and counted to three. "Ikuto, will you allow me cook breakfast for you?" she requested. He stared at her for a moment before he smiled impishly. The smile he gave in reply was one that told her she did exactly what he had wanted.

Amu had already felt such a possibility and she gave a small sigh, "You could simply ask me to cook for you. I'm more than willing to oblige your wishes."

"Exactly. Where's the fun in that?" he asked with mischief glinting in his eyes.

Amu picked up the tray of sweets but Ikuto plucked it out of her hands with ease. "I'll carry it. It's my props anyway," he said good-naturedly, once again disallowing from protesting.

He led the way to the kitchen looking extremely pleased with himself. Amu decided it was a good opportunity to interrogate Ikuto as they walked.

"The Princess –" she began.

"– is practicing together with the Fujisaki heir at their household for the public performance tomorrow. She won't be back until evening."

"I shall follow after –"

"No. You can't," he said firmly. He glanced back at her with a serious expression.

"…why?" Amu asked cautiously. His serious expression melted into a roguish one after a few seconds.

"I made a trade with my sister. You wouldn't awaken no matter what noise my sister made. She needed someone to accompany her to the Fujisaki household and I volunteered Kairi in your stead. She was worried that you might have taken ill – but I said I would handle it and sent her on her way this morning." He explained with his face turned away from her but Amu could tell he was smiling cleverly.

Amu wondered how many times Ikuto had manipulated people like this – but then again, being born royalty must have required him to learn such a skill. To achieve what he wanted – Ikuto had mastered the skills necessary for his position as the Heir to the Throne so she could not blame him.

The values of high society greatly differed from the values of commoners. She had already known that before she started working here – before she met everyone. But though their values were what one would generally call wrong in a commoner's point of view, Amu did not blame them for resorting to such methods. Because she understood that one must do what is necessary to survive in a cruel world like this.

"Amu?" They had arrived at the kitchen. She entered the kitchen and made him sit down as she prepared their meal.

"You're going to be my aide for today," he looked genuinely happy as he said this and Amu could not find any proper reply. She settled on finishing their meal as soon as possible. She turned away from him and focused all of her attention on her task, ignoring the prickly feeling on her neck of being stared at.

Her body's reaction did not escape her notice, however, and she inwardly cursed the speeding up of her pulse at the thought that Ikuto was staring at her intently. She could just picture his eyes – the same eyes that had stared back at her last night…. And she was in inner turmoil despite the poker face she proudly wore.

It was proving more and more difficult to remain completely indifferent in his presence.

Really – what was he doing to her?

-OoO-

For Utau – singing was the same as breathing.

As a child, she had slept and awoken to the lullabies of her mother. Her mother's soft and gentle voice had always roused her from her dreams and lulled her to a peaceful sleep – so it was no wonder that Utau had developed an inclination for singing. Even her name was enough of a sign that she would love singing.

When she had asked her mother a long time ago why she had given her Utau as a name, her mother had readily answered her.

"Because your father and I had a feeling that you would become a song of joy once you would be born."

Had she become the reality of her parents' wishes? Utau did not think so. She had become the exact opposite of their expectations.

But she couldn't do anything else. She couldn't cry, she couldn't show weakness, she couldn't be happy, she couldn't run away either – she could only sing. Singing had become her refuge, her protective shelter from reality.

Singing had become her lifeline when she was drowning in despair.

As long as she could sing, she could still live. Utau did not think there was anything worse than not being able to sing. She felt like it would be the same as being deprived of air if people had told her she would be unable to sing again.

She… had only ever sung for herself all this time – to keep herself going, to keep herself from surrendering completely. The only person she had ever sung for – was her father and one other.

Kukai.

Utau always found her thoughts wandering to him in her idle moments – but this time was different because there was another entity occupying her thoughts today.

Hinamori Amu.

Her aide had not replied to her summons as she slept no matter how loudly she called her or how strongly she shook her. Her face had been pale but her pulse and breathing had rejected Utau's original thought that Amu had looked like she was dead.

Ikuto had witnessed her predicament because of the noise she had made. But despite all the commotion, Amu remained still and unperturbed. Ikuto had offered the services of his aide to accompany her instead – and Utau had only reluctantly agreed because of Ikuto's urging.

Ikuto had reassured her that he would handle it and have her checked by the doctor.

But Utau was still worried after all.

The only thing that would have caused her to become like that was probably… her encounter with her mother and sister.

Utau, Midori-san and Ami had found Ami, Tadase, Yaya and Kukai together at the stall where Utau had left Kukai. Amu had looked less than pleased as she conversed with Kukai, her expression quite grim. Kukai on the other hand looked quite miserable, being scolded by Amu like that. Tadase was trying to calm Amu while Yaya seemed to not know whose side she was supposed to be on.

"Amu-chan?" Amu's expression froze at the sound of Midori-san's voice. She turned, and gaped at the three of them approaching their group.

Ami had let go of Utau's hand and had rushed to her sister shouting, "Onee-chan!" in a jubilant tone. She almost tackled Amu when she jumped into her sister's arms.

Amu had looked… confused, more than surprised. She looked like she didn't know how she was supposed to react. Ami had completely taken possession of Amu's torso and continued to jump gleefully at the appearance of her beloved sister.

"Amu-chan," Midori approached the two of them. Amu gazed back at her mother like a deer in headlights. Utau watched intently from the side lines, watching Amu's every expression. She had never seen her aide look so much at a loss as to what she had to do.

Amu closed her eyes for about three seconds then opened them with a hard glint in her eyes. She faced her mother with a perfect expression of indifference.

"Mother," she acknowledged. Utau thought that Amu's use of the formal name for mother was a little cold – but Midori seemed used to it. Utau watched the older lady give a somewhat sad smile once she was in front of Amu. Midori placed her hand on Ami's head and efficiently unlatched her from Amu.

"Are you working today as well?" she asked gently, keeping Ami at bay. Amu kneeled down and ruffled her younger sister's hair in a reflexive action. Utau felt the action devoid of love, as if Amu did it out of habit.

Midori gave a small laugh, "Forgive me. That was a foolish question. You're not the type to waste your time playing." She smiled – but Utau could see the sadness hidden behind them.

"Onee-chan! Let's walk around together. Please?" her big blue eyes were pleading. Amu was unshaken, however. She pulled her younger sister in an embrace. Amu whispered something in Ami's ear which the young girl replied with a frown; Ami looked close to tears.

Amu stood up – and Ami buried her face in Amu's robes. Clutching the cloth like a life raft, it was clear she didn't like Amu's reply to her request.

"Ami's been a good girl while you were away Onee-chan. Ami helps Mama with the household chores and greets all of the patrons properly. Ami has been working very hard – that's why…" her muffled voice broke into a sob.

Amu looked torn for only a moment – then her expression returned to that indifferent mask.

"Mother," her voice was imploring. Midori seemed to know what Amu wanted to say from that alone.

She gently separated Ami from Amu. "Ami-chan," her voice was gentle and stern at the same time. The same tone her mother used whenever she was correcting Utau for something she did wrong. Ami buried her face in her mother's robe instead. "Amu-chan has to work. Do you understand?"

Utau distinguished the motion of Ami shaking her head.

Amu gave a sigh and placed her hand on Ami's head. She patted her sister's head and said something barely audible.

"You've done well. Onee-chan is proud of you." The slight softening of Amu's eyes had not escaped Utau's notice. "We'll go wherever Ami wants to go the next time I go home, okay?"

Ami's sobs had quieted down to small hiccups. She peeked out an eye from her mother's robe.

"Promise?"

"Promise." She patted Ami's head one last time before she addressed her mother. They had a silent conversation for about half a minute before Midori gave a nod and bowed to all of them suddenly.

"I leave my daughter in you care. Please take care of her." She requested.

"Mother!" Amu looked bothered.

Midori gave her a rueful smile when she straightened herself. "A mother can't help but worry about her child." She explained offhandedly. She ruffled Amu's hair before she and Ami took their leave.

Utau thanked Midori as they left and Midori gave her a very pleased and thankful smile in return – as if she was thanking Utau for the chance to see her daughter.

Utau did not watch the two of them leave. Her eyes were focused on Amu who was watching the two of them leave. The air around her seemed almost regretful and a tad lonely. But it lasted only a moment –once the pair melted back into the crowd, Amu had approached Utau.

"I'm glad you are unhurt," her voice held its usual no nonsense tone.

Utau examined her face carefully before she replied. "I've caused you worry. It was my reckless actions. It's not Kohinata-san's fault, Ame." Amu stared at her for moment before she answered.

"Understood." Utau knew Amu to always be true to her word. She was sure Amu would drop her assumption that Kukai had been at fault. Inwardly, though, she thought Kukai was partly to blame after all.

They had returned to the Palace soon after; Kukai and Yaya had left once they safely escorted them to the Place entrance. Amu had separated from Tadase and her to make a report Tsukasa about their afternoon. Utau had not seen Amu after they had returned – she had only seen her again this morning.

And she looked almost like a corpse.

How could Utau not be worried?

She seemed alright outwardly yesterday – but maybe she was truly bothered by the encounter.

She suddenly felt a hand on her elbow.

"Are you alright, Your Highness?" Kairi asked her in a concerned tone.

Utau glanced at him in the corner of her eye. She wished inwardly that it was Hinamori Amu together with her. She felt more relaxed and calm around the pink-haired girl.

She took a deep breath before she replied. "I am fine."

She was fine... but Amu definitely was not. She resolved to speak with her aide once she returned.

To make her worry like this, who did she think she was? She was just a commoner, someone who couldn't even smile genuinely, someone who was serious beyond belief, someone who placed other people before herself, someone who seemed unlikely to be attached to anything in her whole life - but she was someone that Utau trusted. One of the few who ha gained her trust.

Utau knew that Hinamori Amu had already become someone indispensable to her.

-OoO-

Endnote: I guess I've been gone for a looooong time. But well, I felt the need for some Amuto love and thus this chapter. Gosh, if only I could tell you how many revisions this chapter has undergone since I uploaded chapter 15. There were so many plot changes and plot bunnies kept popping into my head randomly that I didn't know what I wanted to do in the chapter anymore. So eventually, it amounted to this and I'm pretty satisfied with the outcome because well – because I can finally write Amuto again. Ha ha ha! Thank you for patiently waiting for the next chapter. I'm sorry to have kept you hanging for so long – even I hate that. I hope this chapter is a good enough Christmas and New Year gift to all of you! :D I had a good 2013, I hope you all did as well.

Hugs and kisses to all of my readers! I hope you can feel just how much I love all of you. :)

PS: Maybe as a gift, you guys can leave me a review. But no pressure! I'll be happy as long as you read the chapter. :)