From that day on, things were never the same.

Even on days when the support group didn't meet, Candace still had not one, but two little boys to eye suspiciously. Linda had very quickly befriended Lawrence Fletcher, the father of the little green-haired baby, Ferb, that Phineas had taken to; the two parents would bring their children to each others' houses for playdates while they themselves grew closer.

Perry knew what was coming almost from the beginning. Then the one day when the lady met this fellow… and they knew that it was much more than a hunch… that this group must somehow form a family…

He knew it, and Linda and Lawrence seemed to know it almost as soon as he did, but they both still waited for nearly a year, guilty looks in their eyes when they would tentatively bring it up, both of them being so recently widowed.

Perry was overcome by such a melancholy acceptance that he could do nothing but hide away from his family and tremble for a few days. Luckily Doofenshmirtz was keeping quiet.

But finally, one night, instead of curling up next to Candace or Phineas, he instead curled up to Linda before she fell asleep, nuzzling her hand and giving her what he hoped was a soft and encouraging look. For one brief second, her eyes flickered with recognition… but then it was gone, replaced by a smile.

Linda and Lawrence officially got engaged the next day, and were married less than two months afterwards.

The blended family soon moved to a larger house on the outskirts of Danville. It had a large backyard, perfect for the kids and platypus to play in. The OWCA, upon learning of the move, equipped the new house with more appropriately sized secret entrances to Perry's lair, and removed all traces of the previous entrances at the old house. It was clear that they were expecting Agent P to remain in action. It was also clear that they were expecting him to remain a platypus.

As the years passed Perry kept a watchful eye on his family, both as the family pet and as the secret Agent P. As Candace made her way through elementary and middle school she pulled away from her pet platypus, her peers finding him creepy and Candace longing for social acceptance. No longer was Perry her "patty-tus". But Perry didn't despair. Some nights, instead of sleeping on Phineas's or Ferb's bed, he'd crawl into Candace's room and onto her bed instead, and if she was awake when he did so she didn't object, and in fact in the mornings he'd often awaken to a fond scratch on the head.

Phineas and Ferb, however, were not publicly embarrassed by their pet. They embraced him no matter what the circumstance or what they feared people would think. Soon, Perry was their pet more so than anyone else's, and Perry happily followed his boys whenever his occupation didn't interfere. He delighted in watching them grow up, the perfect brothers to each other. In some ways they were completely identical; in others they couldn't have been more different. Both were the most easy-going children Perry had ever known; both were clearly astronomically intelligent, even at a young age. But where Phineas had the wild imagination that could hardly be pinned down, the far more grounded Ferb would pin it down for him. Phineas was the social one of the duo; Ferb hadn't even spoken until he was four and a half years old—and even after that, his words were few and far between. Together, they were an unstoppable force… much to Candace's dismay.

Perry loved watching them, and he loved it when they involved him in their plans, but as the years went on, Doofenshmirtz concocted more and more plans too. Perry would often be loath to leave the boys, but almost just as often, after their battles that Perry always won, he would be loath to leave Doofenshmirtz as well.

Life for Perry, in a nutshell, would have seemed too bizarre to even comprehend if he ever really thought about it.

So he didn't think about it.

He was Perry the Platypus, pet to the Flynn-Fletchers and best enemy of Heinz Doofenshmirtz, and that was that. Some days he almost forgot—

…no. He never forgot. He always remembered. He couldn't escape his humanity.

"Hey look, Candace, Ferb and I found all your old baby pictures!"

Phineas held the book out to his older sister excitedly, Ferb clutching Perry. Candace, who had been lounging on the couch and reading a teen magazine, dropped the periodical in horror. "Ohmigosh Phineas, wherever you found those, you better put them back there right now!"

"Aw, come on, Candace, they're cute!" laughed Phineas good-naturedly, flipping open the book and cooing over baby Candace. "What are you so worried about?"

"I'm worried that there's pictures of me in there where I'm probably naked and drooling all over myself, and if anybody sees those my life will be ruined!"

"I think you're being a little overly dramatic," grinned Phineas. "It's not like you're the only person in the world with baby pictures. Hey, wait a minute, who's this?"

Both Candace and Ferb crowded on either side of Phineas and looked at the picture he was indicating, with a smallish, brown-eyed man holding a laughing baby Candace…

Perry's blood froze.

Candace examined the photo. "I think that's—"

"Let's see what the back says!" cried Phineas, apparently not having heard Candace. He pulled out the picture and read the writing on the back, looking even more confused. "Phineas and Candace? But that's not me!"

"Duh!" said Candace, rolling her eyes. "That's our dad. Our biological dad."

Phineas's eyes grew wide. "Our dad?"

Perry had frozen in Ferb's arms, unable to move, unable to think, only able to mutely stare at the photo of the man who had once, a lifetime ago, been… him.

"I was named after our dad? I never knew that!" Phineas carefully replaced the photo and turned to the next page. "Yeah, he must be our dad, there he is with Mom—and there they both are on your first birthday, feeding you cake!" He turned and looked at his older sister questioningly. "Why do you suppose Mom never talks about him? And why these photo albums were hidden in a box buried under a bunch of other boxes in the closet?"

"That's because I'm the least favorite child and nobody cares about my baby pictures," Candace grumbled.

Perry made a low, clicking, contradictory growl in Candace's direction.

"Or it could be because the memories of your father are too painful for Mum and she'd rather push the pain of the past aside entirely," Ferb pointed out.

"Hmm." Phineas looked at Candace again. "Whatever happened to him, then? Do you even remember him?"

Perry drew in his breath, as he, Phineas, and Ferb all looked at Candace expectantly.

Candace was unusually quiet and thoughtful for a few moments.

"I… no, not really… I mean, I remember him a little bit, but nothing really specific. The only specific thing I really remember is Mom telling me that he was gone for good."

"What did she say? What happened to him?"

"I don't know."

"Maybe we should ask her ourselves—"

"No, I don't mean I don't remember, I mean I don't know. And Mom doesn't either. He and a lot of other people just… they just vanished, I guess. No one ever figured out what happened to them."

Phineas looked stunned. "Just… gone? Just like that?"

Candace nodded. "Just like that."

A slight vibration on Perry's wrist provided him with the blessed excuse of leaving the scene, and the normally stealthy platypus immediately jumped at the chance to exit the crushing, heartbreaking reminder of everything he had once been. He squirmed out of Ferb's arms and scurried out of the room as quickly as he could on all fours.

"Hey, where's Perry going?" Phineas asked.

"Who cares, he always comes back anyway," said Candace lightly. "Come on, let's look some more at this book."

Perry moved into the bathroom as if on autopilot, robotically moving to the sliding tile panel on the wall and sliding into Secret Slide Number Eight that led to his underground headquarters, his heart pounding too intensely for any coherent thoughts to remain in his mind.

If he looked at all frazzled or out-of-sorts as he landed in his chair, Monogram either didn't notice it or didn't comment on it. "Good afternoon, Agent P. I hope you're hungry today, because Doofenshmirtz is at it again. I know he's been quiet for a few days now, but just early this morning he bought copious amounts of potatoes, and we want you to—"

Perry snapped on his jetpack and blasted away, not needing another word.

"—put… a… stop to it." Monogram huffed in irritation. "Why do I feel more and more like the fifth wheel around here?"

Perry kicked his rocket packs into overdrive, zooming to Doofenshmirtz Evil Incorporated at record speed. The sooner he got there, the sooner things would be back to normal and he'd be feeling like his old self again—

Back to normal? His old self? What Candace and Phineas and Ferb had been looking at was his old self! How could being a secret agent platypus who regularly does battle with a disturbed evil scientist ever be normal? What had his life come to?

He had been intending on crashing through what he knew to be the kitchen window, but to his disappointment he found that it was already open, and instead of making a satisfactory crash he made a perfect yet non-destructive landing right in front of the stove.

Doofenshmirtz, sitting at the kitchen table and peeling what was indeed a copious amount of potatoes, looked genuinely surprised to see Perry. "Perry the Platypus? If I had known you were coming I would have closed the window!"

Perry growled dangerously.

"I'm afraid I don't have a trap prepared for you this time, I've been too busy working on this!" With his usual evil cackle, Doofenshmirtz motioned to the device sitting on his table, looking like a somewhat larger-than-average blender-like device perched atop a toaster oven. "The Tater-Inator! It slices, dices, scallops, mashes, bakes, and deep-fries, with a minimum amount of grease!"

Perry blinked.

There was a slight, awkward silence.

"Well, okay," Doofenshmirtz finally admitted, his cheeks flushing abashedly, "so it's not exactly the most evil invention I've ever devised—to be perfectly honest I just wanted to jump on the name before some jerk stole it from me, I mean, come on, Tater-Inator, it's a catchy name, someone else might have thought of it before me, but since it's an inator it has to be mine, and…"

Another awkward silence.

Doofenshmirtz abruptly grabbed a plate of finished potatoes and held them out to Perry.

"Waffle fries, Perry the Platypus?"

…

The Flynn-Fletchers had always been a good family to their pet platypus. They did extensive research on their exotic pet and learned that the platypus's diet consisted of worms, larvae, and shrimp, which they carefully and faithfully provided, along with the more readily and easily obtained cans of dog food. Before turning into a platypus, Perry would have been utterly turned off by the idea of growing accustomed to this kind of diet, but thankfully, whatever taste buds he had obtained upon his transformation didn't object to this new, questionable palate. It didn't exactly taste good, but it didn't taste bad either, and it filled him up.

But he had quickly discovered, as first Candace and then Phineas and Ferb began sneaking him table scraps, that the sense of taste was more a mental thing than anything else. Those small morsels that he would snarf up every once in a while would fire off so many pleasant memories of food that sometimes he took to actually begging at the table like a dog, wanting more of that wonderful sensation.

But even that wasn't the same; he was gobbling it with just his mouth like any mindless pet, not sitting at a table with cutlery and using his hands.

And yet that was exactly what he was doing here.

He tried to slow himself down, but he couldn't help himself; they were just so delicious, these waffle fries. They were drowning in ketchup, a condiment that the human Phineas could take or leave, but to the platypus Perry it was taste, it was taste and it was marvelous, and in no time at all he had already devoured nearly the entire plate of waffle fries and had covered them in ketchup no less than four times.

"Wow, Perry the Platypus, you eat like you haven't had a decent meal in years!" commented Doofenshmirtz, probably not even realizing how close to the mark he really was. "But that's perfectly alright, eat as much as you want, I have another batch cooking! Plus some shoestring potatoes! And don't worry, they're not actually made of shoestrings, they're just cut like them. I was skeptical at first myself, they're all tiny and crunchy, but they'll grow on you, I swear."

The Tater-Inator dinged.

"And I think the baked potatoes are done!" He opened up the bottom drawer where two potatoes wrapped in foil awaited him. Perry longingly sniffed the heavenly aroma as Doofenshmirtz painfully played hot potato with the potatoes, the potatoes being… well, hot, apparently hotter than he had been anticipating. "YEEOUCH! Ouch ouch ouch that's hot!" He managed to drop one squarely on Perry's plate. "And I'd recommend waiting a little bit before digging in, you bottomless pit, they're still a trifle caliente." He quickly dropped the other potato onto his own plate and rubbed his sore fingers with a pained expression on his face.

Perry snatched up his knife and fork, eagerly peeling off the foil wrapping and slicing open the potato, taking a brief moment to savor the smell before reaching for the salt and pepper shakers.

Doofenshmirtz let go of his fingers. "How stupid of me, I forgot the condiments!" He quickly jumped up and moved to the refrigerator, opening it up and digging through its contents, occasionally throwing an item or two in Perry's direction. "Here's some butter… oh, and sour cream—" He turned back to look at Perry. "Do you like sour cream, Perry the Platypus?"

Perry nodded eagerly.

"Well, too bad! Because I don't have any! But I do have some bacon bits." He threw a sealed plastic container squarely at Perry's head, bouncing it off the platypus before it came to a landing on the table. Doofenshmirtz laughed. "Ha ha! There, I got at least one petty jab at you in for the day. Wouldn't have felt right if I'd just done nothing, you know."

Perry was too concentrated on the food to even pretend to be annoyed. He pulled the lid off the container and began scooping bacon bits onto his potato.

"Hey, hold on a minute, don't take all of those! I want some too!"

Perry sighed, but dutifully pushed the container away.

"Now that's more reasonable. Sheesh, if I didn't know any better I'd think you were starving or something. Oh wait, we still don't have anything to drink! I'll get the champagne."

Champagne? Perry quickly but politely shook his head.

But Doofenshmirtz was already pulling the bottle from the fridge. "Aw, come on, Perry the Platypus, I so rarely have company and I can't drink this all by myself!"

Perry crossed his arms.

Doofenshmirtz's eyes lit up in understanding. "Oh, wait, I get it. You drove here, didn't you?"

Well, flew here, but he had the right idea. Perry nodded.

"Come on. Just one little sip won't hurt you." Doofenshmirtz gave Perry a large, pleading grin. "Come on. Just one sip? Please?"

Perry sighed in defeat, and held up one webbed finger.

Doofenshmirtz instantly and gleefully popped the cork from the bottle. "Awesome! I've been waiting for a special occasion to break this open, ever since my last five dates all cancelled on me!" Pulling the champagne goblets from his shelf, he gave Perry a sudden, sour look. "Not that you're my date or anything."

Perry growled in agreement.

"But still, date or not, you're eating my potatoes and drinking my champagne!" Doofenshmirtz carefully poured two glasses of champagne and sat down to his own waiting baked potato, passing one glass to Perry.

Perry carefully raised the glass to his bill and took a sip. Mmm, champagne was another wondrous taste he had all but forgotten.

"You know, Perry the Platypus, I never exactly had you pegged as a connoisseur of fine dining—no offense—but I guess I had you all wrong! You do appreciate fine dining! You like my baked potato, yes?"

Perry nodded and gave Doofenshmirtz a thumbs up before digging back into his potato.

"Excellent! Then my Tater-Inator is a success! AH-HA HA HA HAAAAA…" Doofenshmirtz stopped there, his evil laughter ending abruptly. "No, actually, I don't think that warranted an evil laugh." He picked up his knife and fork and cut open his own baked potato. "Could you please pass the salt, Perry the Platypus?"

Perry dutifully handed it over.

"Thank you!" Doofenshmirtz salted and peppered his potato and dug right in, although at a much slower pace than Perry. Perry, for his part, was attempting to slow down and eat in a more civilized fashion, although the glorious tastes were still nearly overwhelming him.

It's a good thing I don't think about my life much. Because here I am, a platypus, having an amicable dinner of potatoes and champagne with my sworn enemy.

He swallowed another gulp of champagne.

Why am I so used to this?

Doofenshmirtz gulped down a mouthful of potatoes. "Sooo… what's new with you?" he asked, lightly and conversationally.

Perry shrugged. What was he supposed to say to that? Even if he could talk? Oh, my biological children and their stepbrother just stumbled across old photographs that were a painful reminder of the man I used to be, you know, nothing special…

Doofenshmirtz looked at Perry in surprise. "Now that's a downcast look, Perry the Platypus."

Perry gulped, straightening up. Dammit. No downcast looks here. He couldn't really afford that. That would just make him wish he could explain. He couldn't, though; he couldn't explain anything, what with the power of speech robbed from him these past ten years—

"You know, it's a shame you can't explain what's bugging you, because I can tell something's really got you down, and it's always therapeutic to talk about these things." With a small shrug, Doofenshmirtz quickly added, "Of course, the most therapeutic coping method is hatching evil schemes and all, but chatting over waffle fries is a close second."

Perry blinked, looking at Doofenshmirtz in confusion.

Doofenshmirtz looked a little guilty. "I'm sorry we couldn't do this earlier, Perry the Platypus. You know, catch up and chat and do battle with each other and all. I know, I know, you haven't heard anything from me for a few days now and when I'm finally ready to show you my newest inator it's not even evil at all. I've had other things on my mind. It was my weekend with Vanessa, you know, and I always try to get as much quality time in with her as possible… and, well, usually she either helps me with my evil schemes or is just all aloof and teenager-y and doesn't really do anything, you know? But this whole weekend she didn't even speak to me!" He paused for a moment. "Well, actually," he corrected, "she did speak to me once when I tried to apologize, something along the lines of 'Don't you dare even look at me!' before she stormed out and spent the entire day out doing who-knows-what with her friends." He dug into his potato with a defensive snarl. "Well excuse me, I was only telling her that I picked up those tampons for her at the store like she asked me! How was I supposed to know she had friends over? She never has friends over! And what's the big deal, anyway? She's embarrassed that they know she has menstrual cycles or what? She's female! They all have menstrual cycles! It's not like it's a huge secret or anything!"

Perry set down his fork, giving Doofenshmirtz a sympathetic look. He might have made an embarrassing slip-up, but still, he was trying to be a good dad and he wasn't getting any reward for it.

"I'm trying to be a good dad, but I'm not getting any reward for it!" Doofenshmirtz sighed, picking at his potato with his fork but looking upwards helplessly. "So anyway, so she walked out on me—this was Saturday, by the way—and so I spent all day calling her even though she never answered, I mean really, I put in one hundred and seventy-three calls and they all went straight to voicemail—and when she finally came home that night naturally I grounded her, but Sunday she just took off again!" He sighed again. "I don't know, Perry the Platypus, when these kind of things happen… you just can't even think about evil, you know what I mean?" He looked back at Perry. "No, I don't suppose you do know what I mean. I don't suppose you have children."

It was the quickest, most momentary of gulps and eyes flickering to the ground, and Perry regained his composure almost as fast. But unfortunately, Doofenshmirtz knew Perry well enough to notice the flicker of remorse.

"Oooh, Perry the Platypus, you have a troubled backstory too!" he said with sympathetic concern.

Perry shook his head in irritation, turning away from him.

"Don't you lie to me, Perry the Platypus. I know troubled backstories, trust me. I can always tell."

Perry crossed his arms, still not looking at Doofenshmirtz. Of course you'd know this one, he tried to make himself think, because it's all your fault. He tried to make himself think it, anyway… but he couldn't. He didn't believe it for a second. True, there had never been anyone else who was a prime candidate for the whole turning-the-agents-into-animals episode. True, if it were someone else that would mean that some dangerous evil genius had been running around free and uncaught for these past ten years, someone conceivably much more dangerous than Doofenshmirtz could even dream of being—and that was not a pleasant thought indeed.

But in their ten years of being nemeses, Perry had arrived at the conclusion that Doofenshmirtz hadn't been the mastermind behind that particular plot. In fact, he knew for a fact that he wasn't. If he had been, he would have mentioned it. And gloated about his animal-transmorphing-ray-inator-whatever he would have called it. He liked to gloat about every evil scheme he had ever concocted, way down to the most trite and unimportant.

And he had never mentioned anything about figuring out how to turn people into animals.

Some brilliant, twisted, evil mind had snatched Perry's humanity from him… and it hadn't been Doofenshmirtz.

In fact…

"Well, maybe someday you'll want to talk about it. I know you're a platypus of few words and all, but whenever you want to vent, a nemesis is a good venting post, you know." Doofenshmirtz cut another bite of potato, slowly and thoughtfully putting it in his mouth. "It's… funny… when I think about it…" He swallowed and continued speaking, his voice now not hindered by food in his mouth. "So it's probably a good thing I don't think about it that much, but—"

Perry looked up to see Doofenshmirtz looking unusually calm and thoughtful, directing his attention to the Tater-Inator. "I mean, I should be miserable. Look at me, I'm forty-five years old and what do I have to show for a lifetime of evil? A device that cooks potatoes, that's it."

Perry growled in reminder.

"Yes, yes, you too of course… and Vanessa… but I'm talking material things here. Let's face it, Perry the Platypus, my life has sucked. You know it has, you've heard the vast majority of my backstories, and I'm just a cosmic punching bag or something. Do you know what it's like to fall in the mud? And get kicked? In the head? With an iron boot? —Of course you don't, no one does, that never happens… sorry Perry, that's a dumb question, skip that… but anyway, you know, I should be miserable. And a lot of the times I am, I'm all miserable and diabolically hell-bent on seeking revenge and all, and that's fine and dandy, but…"

He set his fork down.

"But the funny thing is, right now, despite everything, I'm actually very… content." He blinked. "What's wrong with me? Because I am very content right at this moment, and I like it! But I have absolutely no reason to be content! I mean, having a delicious dinner of potatoes with my best enemy isn't grounds for—" He stopped himself there in surprise, turning his full attention back to Perry with a genuinely shocked expression.

Perry wasn't quite as shocked—in fact, he even threw Doofenshmirtz a sly grin, knowing that he had just come to the same conclusion Perry had long ago. Their relationship, however it could be defined (Perry was pretty sure that no words existed that could accurately and concisely sum it up), gave Doofenshmirtz—

"You really are my venting post, aren't you?" he said in dumbfounded realization. "You're—you're more therapeutic and effective than any psychiatrist, Perry the Platypus! And believe me, I've been through a lot of them!"

Perry smirked at him, scooping up his last bite of baked potato into his bill. Yes, enemies though they may be, Perry had always been the most captive (literally) audience to Doofenshmirtz's tales of woe. He listened.

But… why?

Perry's smirk faded into confusion.

He could say it was the pretense of simply learning exactly what his evil plot was, but clearly that wasn't always the case, today being a most egregious example. There obviously was no evil plot today, and yet there he sat, listening, listening while gratefully eating the food his nemesis provided him…

He looked down at his hands, hands that were grasping utensils, attached to a body sitting in a chair, a half-full glass of champagne by his side, and had to remind himself that he was still a pet. His family were loving and caring owners, but they thought of him as a pet, nothing more.

The only person who actually treated him as if he were human… was Doofenshmirtz.

Doofenshmirtz hadn't taken away his humanity. He had been providing it to him this entire time.

"A-ha!" Doofenshmirtz pointed triumphantly at Perry. "I saw that smile, Perry the Platypus, don't try to hide it from me! You're content too! Don't deny it!"

Surprised, Perry considered this for a moment.

Sure, he might be content at this moment, but what about in the long run? He had made peace with his life, yes, but… wait…

Perry closed his eyes, forcing himself to contemplate what things would be like if he were still human. No Perry the Platypus in this lifetime. Just human cop-slash-secret agent Phineas Flynn.

He'd have his wife and daughter and son… which he technically still had, but they'd know him in this hypothetical timeline, not just as the mindless family pet. He might not always be there for them physically, what with his demanding jobs and all, and…

But was that really for the best?

He could remember Linda's worrying, worrying that doubtless would have continued had her husband not "died" and continued on with his careers as always. He could remember going long stretches without seeing Candace, without being there for her, often missing out on so many of her milestones…

And what about Phineas—the current Phineas, his biological son?

The word happy didn't even begin to describe that boy. Phineas had a completely charmed life. Not only did he have an attentive mother and an older sister who, deep down, truly cared for him too… but he also had a father, a father with a much more steady, stable job that gave him plenty of time with both Candace and Phineas in addition to Ferb. And he had a brother who was his equal, his best friend, his partner in every sense of the word. It was impossible to imagine either Phineas or Ferb without the other. And yet, if Perry had never been transformed, if he were still human… they boys likely would have never even met.

Who know? Were things actually turning out for the better after his turning into a platypus? Could he even make that judgment one way or the other? Perry was lucky in many aspects that he was still able to be there for his family, watch them grow, and even literally protect them thanks to still keeping up his secret-agent persona. The Flynn-Fletcher family was happy, all five of them, and happy to a degree that they probably couldn't be if the original Phineas Flynn was still in the picture.

He had made peace with that years ago; it was the only way to stay sane. Well, that and actually keeping regular conversations—and regardless of the fact he that he couldn't actually speak, his conversations with Doofenshmirtz were still very much two-way. And so that… that he had as well. Somehow, he was still sane. He had made peace with himself, with his situation. And he was…

Gulping down his last sip of champagne, Perry turned back to Doofenshmirtz with a soft, much more deliberate smile on his bill and nodded in affirmation of his observation. Yes. He was content. In fact, right now, he couldn't imagine anything that would make him more content.

"Of course you are! Really, who wouldn't be content after such delicious waffle fries?"

Perry nodded again, and gave a low, clicking purr of thanks for the meal.

"You're welcome," Doofenshmirtz answered instantly.

Perry grinned more fully. It was always nice to be understood. He pushed his chair away from the table and hopped off.

"Wait, you're leaving already?" protested Doofenshmirtz. "But you haven't foiled my evil plan yet!"

Perry raised an eyebrow at him.

Doofenshmirtz chuckled in embarrassment. "Oh, right, the Tater-Inator was the evil plan."

Perry nodded. And he sure as hell wasn't going to foil a plan that produced such delicious potatoes. He reached into his fedora and pulled out his jetpack—and his eyes caught a splotch of ketchup that had landed to the side of his chair. Oops. He had gone a little overboard on those waffle fries. For one brief second he considered getting a towel to clean it up, but quickly decided against it. I'll make Heinz clean that up. We are nemeses, after all.

So instead, he ignored the ketchup and strapped on his jetpack, throwing Doofenshmirtz a farewell salute.

Doofenshmirtz returned it. "It's been far too long, we really should do this more often! I promise I'll have another scheme tomorrow. And I promise it'll be way eviler than this. And maybe we could have more waffle fries!" He stopped briefly to consider this. "No, actually, that wouldn't be evil; what would be evil is if I promised you the waffle fries right now, but then break my promise tomorrow. So—" He gave Perry an over-the-top, evil grin. "I promise you we will have more waffle fries tomorrow," he said, very forcefully and deliberately.

Perry sighed. He tries so hard… He blasted out of the window, his work there done.

Wait, something was missing…

But it wasn't missing for long. Even when flying away from the building, Perry still heard Doofenshmirtz's outraged shock loud and clear.

"What is this? He dropped ketchup all over my floor and didn't clean it up? CURSE YOU, PERRY THE PLATYPUS!"

Perry smiled.