Right, so this is something completely different from my pervious stories. This is a one-shot (maybe) that was thought of immediately upon JJ's temporary return. I always felt that she and Reid had missed their chance and this is me righting that wrong. It's a little AU, I guess, a little OOC, but ah well. The title comes from a song I am current obsessed with entitled "Murder My Heart" by Lady Gaga and Michael Bolton. Listen to the song while reading this, if you want. I dont own Criminal Minds or the song, so enjoy. Any and all mistakes are mine.

The more Jennifer Jareau studied the case, the more she felt stressed out. Somehow she had forgotten the terrible things people did to other people for the fun of it. She closed the case file, rubbing her temples. She needed some comfort and knew of only way to get it.

"You alright?" Derek Morgan asked.

"Yeah, just…you know where Reid is?"

"With Garcia, I think."

She thanked him and stood up, dumping the cold coffee and making her way towards the hallway. Spencer was just leaving Garcia's office when JJ found him. "Hey," he greeted, but she merely took his hand and drug him to the ladies' bathroom. She shoved him inside and locked the door.

"Uh, JJ?"

"Take off your shirt, Spence." She ordered, reaching up and undoing his tie.

"What?" He squeaked, surprised.

"Shirt. Off. Now. Spencer." She repeated.

He helped her out of his sweat vest and white button-down, dropping them to the bathroom floor. She stripped out of her jacket and blouse (which he hung up on one of the bathroom stall door hooks), and pulled her into his arms. She sighed at the skin-on-skin contact and buried her face in his neck, breathing in his scent. She imagined the make quite the picture, both half naked (she still wore her bra) and holding each other, but she needed the calm that could only come from the comfort of having his skin on hers.

They had had a connection from day one, despite the fact that they were so different, yet so alike. They were both closer in age than the other members of the team, and had fought hard to be where they were (she being a woman and he being a genius). It sucked that they had had had to hide their relationship because of where they worked (stupid Rossi and stupid no fraternizing rule). His drug addiction hadn't helped their relationship, which was where she had met Will, and while she would never regret that, because ultimately, it had given her Henry, more often than not, she wondered if maybe Spence should've been the father…

She was brought out of her thoughts by the soft kiss Spencer had placed on her temple and she leaned back slightly. She looked down at his chest and noticed new scars, one she hadn't been present for and that made her miss him even more. Before her stupid transfer, she had known Spencer Reid's body better than her own thanks to a wild weekend in Hawaii before she got pregnant and after that, it became a monthly thing for them to strip to nothing and categorize new scars. She hadn't been able to do that since she left, and really, it was because that Will was now around. All. The. Time. In fact, when he moved in, any alone time she normally spent with Spence, was cut down dramatically.

She ran her fingers lightly over the first new scar before pressing a heavy kiss to the scarred flesh (their brand of healing and forgiving the other of all blame of whatever incident that earned them the newest addition). It was repeated to the other two new ones before she traveled to his back, trailing her fingertips across his abdomen and delighting in his shivers. He had picked up a new one on his right shoulder and it looked fresh. "What's this?" She whispered against his skin.

"My price for arrogance." He answered. She laid her forehead between his shoulder blade.

"Told you your 'can't-die-attitude' would bite you in the ass." She reminded him.

"More like the shoulder." He grumbled and she giggled despite herself.

"Who was with you?"

"Rossi."

She made a note to remind the older agent the consequences of allowing her genius to be hurt (and as a warning to the others who didn't keep a close eye on Spence when they were in the field, per her instructions before she left. Not that he knew that, of course).

She wrapped her arms around his waist and rested her chin on his shoulder. They watched each other through the mirror. She could look into his eyes a thousand times and still be left breathless. They were a gorgeous couple, no doubt, but she always found the beauty in Spence's imperfections. "What do you see?" She questioned softly.

Before Will came into the picture, they would always stand like this, naked and exposed for the other to see in a way none of their pervious lovers had, and ask what the other saw. For him, it was always the same answer. "Hope." She tightened her grip and looked into his eyes. She always saw two things in his eyes; Love and Pain. He had admitted to her one night in the dark, that those were the two emotions he felt best. She fell in love with him even more for his confession.

It was almost sad how things had gotten so far away from them. They had had to end their affair when Will moved to Virginia and that had been so much harder and painful for her than giving birth to Henry. When she found out that she was pregnant, she had hoped that Spence was the father, but no. She had stayed away after that, but some things never changed. Feeling nostalgic, she began trailing kisses across his shoulder and up his neck. Just behind his ear and right at the hairline, she nipped and he groaned. He was still so responsive to her, that she felt a power she hadn't felt in a long time. She grasped a silver of flesh between her teeth and tugged before sucking hard. She had always marked him when she felt this way. Will preferred to do the biting, something she was beginning to hate, because he was too rough. Unlike Spence, who did it as a sign of worship and adoration. Don't get her wrong, he got possessive and rough every now and again, but that was saved for the inside of her thighs, and not her sensitive neck. Yeah, she had him well trained, and he was, to date, her best and brightest student. She moved to face him, moving down his chest and settling on his right nipple. She took a bite out of the flesh right where his heart was, and he reached out to grasp her hips and moaned her name, "Jennifer."

He was the only guy that she had been with that called her "Jennifer" in the bedroom. And outside the office. And she loved it. It showed that she could be herself with him, and that "JJ" was not the same as "Jennifer"

She slipped out of her heels and reached down to unbuckle his belt. She bit her lip when his breath hitched and his slacks dropped slightly, and she dipped her fingertips into his waistband. "Tease," he whispered playfully.

That was another thing; Spence wasn't a dirty talker in bed (much. There were some moments that called for it…). Will, however, did it all the time. It was never playfully and sweet; it was controlling and all about him. Spence had been the kind of lover she hadn't known she wanted until she had been with him. With him, it was always her, her, her, before him, him, him. She always came twice before he joined in on the fun. And was always rewarded for it, she thought with a smirk.

She watched as he stepped out of his shoes, hitched his pants back up (but left them undone) and lifted her to sit on the counter. He nuzzled her chest, and that she felt that warm, fuzzy feeling she'd been missing. "Hmm," he hummed happily. "Was this your intention when you volunteered to work this case?" he asked softy, planting soft kisses on her shoulder.

"If I say yes, will you think terrible things of me?" she asked coyly.

He smirked. "Not at all, since we both know you're only using me for my sexual prowess." She laughed and hitched her skirt up so she could wrap her legs around his waist and being him closer. She brushed his hair back (for all the grief he got, she adored the shorter style) and smiled at him, saying, "I love you, Spence."

He smiled and replied "Quite right, too."

She slapped his chest playfully. "No quoting Doctor Who."

"Oh, the fact that you know that is so sexy to me."

She laughed again and wrapped her arms around his neck, pressing her cheek to his and whispering in his ear "Does this make me the Rose to your Doctor?" He moaned in appreciation.

"I'm pretty sure you're the only woman for me, Jennifer Jareau." He confessed. She was fine with that. She grinned before turning serious.

"What?" He asked, dropping his smile.

"Kiss me, Spencer."

It was one of the conditions to the…random meetings since Henry. Kissing on the lips were rare occasions. Very rare.

"What about Will?" He asked, tempted.

"Things haven't been good between us, and that's my fault because I walk around, comparing him to you. And he always falls short."

"You need to be sure about this, Jennifer."

"I am sure, Spencer. It's you I'm worried about."

"Me?" He asked, surprised.

"I come with baggage, in the form of a two year old."

"I can be Henry's father, Jennifer. I've said it before. Hell, being his godfather practically makes me his father. I want to do it."

"And I know that, I just…I'm tired of missing you, Spence. And I'm tired of being with Will when I know you could make me and Henry happy." She confessed.

"I will, Jennifer. I will make you both so happy. I love you. I'm still in love with you." He pledged.

It was so surreal that they were having this conversation in a locked bathroom at the BAU, both of them half naked, and Spence covered in fresh love bites. But then again, this was them written all over. He pulled her closer to place his own mark (easily covered by her hair) and she could feel his love being poured into it. "Be with me," he whispered. She slid her fingers through his hair and pulled his head to her. "Always." She whispered against his lips.

And then she kissed him. And it was like coming home.

Take of this what you will