Love Is To Blame

Caroline Forbes wasn't mad anymore. No… now "mad" was entirely an understatement. Caroline Forbes was utterly and completely pissed beyond seeing red. Or… that was what she was trying to tell herself anyways. She didn't actually see red, so she reasoned she was just so far past this point that she couldn't comprehend it anymore.

Tyler Lockwood. How dare he leave town and not say but two words to anyone but Matt? Course, the small voice in the back of her head tried to tell her otherwise… she had said some pretty mean things to him. And meant ever single one of them; he stood there and watched people he cared about, her, to nearly be killed just cause some chick comes out of nowhere and claims she can help him with his "inner wolf"? They were doing just fine together, working it out slowly and… and…

And don't forget she also mentioned about you…ya know lying to his face about some pretty important shit right? Shit he deserved to know.

Caroline sighed and let herself fall backwards onto her bed. Staring up at the ceiling she bit down on her bottom lip. Her anger very nearly lifted right then and there… nearly. It wasn't her place to tell about other vampires in town, especially ones that killed his uncle. Besides he had chosen to go with Jules. Did he even think about it really? According to Elena, Jules had been lying to his face even before he left with her! And he still just up and left with the enemy knowing that.

Like you did with Katherine just because you were afraid of her and what she might do? So paralyzed with fear you didn't even think of your friendship with Elena or what it might do to others?

"That was different!" She snarled at the voice in the back of her head out loud. Making excuses for Tyler's actions were not allowed! But the anger was already ebbing away. She knew deep down he left to protect everyone he cared about. So long as he had no control over his beast he could seriously hurt someone… maybe even kill. Maybe… even her. And he would never be able to get over that; it had been hard enough to try and ease his guilt over Sarah's death. Killing someone he loved…

It would devastate him.

She shuddered at that thought. Why was she so focused on Tyler anyways? She had her own problems to deal with right now. Matt found out about her, about the vampires. She hadn't even gotten him to calm down after she had healed him with her blood. He just kept ranting and ranting about "what did she do?" and eventually she let him out of the house with a numb hole in her chest. That was days ago and she hadn't heard from him yet. No return calls or texts, Bonnie even said he wasn't at school.

Matt doesn't understand you.

She groaned and threw her hands over her eyes. He couldn't understand her; there was no way he could possibly could. His dead sister was on his mind and suddenly she felt like they were all the way back to the beginning. But how could he seriously think that she killed his sister? Matt said he loved her, he was supposed to just… know right?

Tyler didn't judge you when you said you took life before.

Oh no, no, no… she was NOT going to compare Matt and Tyler right now. And Tyler didn't have the right at that point anymore either. Even if Sarah's death was an accident, he understood what it was like to take a life. The guilt that welled up inside of you and threatened to drag you under was almost worth cutting all emotions off. Damon said it was easy, but she never could bring herself to do it; to stop feeling for Matt, to stop loving him…

Is it love, or was he just the first person to care for you?

Caroline gritted her teeth and shot off the bed to her closet. She dug out the small cooler chest hidden in the back and grabbed out a bag of blood. Flopping on the floor crossed legged she sipped out the 'straw' trying to look as petulant as she felt. Of course she loved Matt! All she wanted was for him to stay safe, and she was dangerous to him. As much as she desired to be with him, she desired his blood so much more; having tasted it, her mind could only focus on doing it again until he was drained dry. She hissed feeling her fangs protruding and sucked harder on the blood bag.

You never craved Tyler's blood.

He was a freaking werewolf! She shouldn't desire his blood; she should be focused on tearing him apart instead. Kill the threat that will kill you, it was a simple concept. Except… she never felt that way about Tyler. Damon once mentioned that whenever Tyler was even close by, his face wanted to shift and he wanted to hunt and kill him. But Caroline never felt that way… in fact being close to Tyler had been a relief. He understood so much that not even Bonnie and Elena could. No matter how Stefan or Damon tried, they weren't new to this life anymore; they forgot how hard it was to resist daily life.

Caroline slid the empty bag under her bed for now. Suddenly she didn't have the energy to even move anymore, the blood wasn't working. It was the feeling in the pit of her stomach that was slowly crawling up her throat she was trying to ignore that was weighing her down. She wanted to talk to someone. To yell and scream and throw a tantrum; for someone to tell her she needed to stop acting like a child and suck it up. To just breathe in, focus and concentrate; Elena was out with Stefan, and good lord she didn't want to talk to Bonnie (she judged a little too easy these days) even if she was probably holed up in a room with Jeremy somewhere. Damon was certainly not an option. Even if Matt wanted to listen to her, that wasn't the one who she wanted to hole herself up with.

He's gone. Tyler's really gone.

The feeling was stuck in her throat now. She couldn't admit this; admitting this meant so much and she couldn't accept that. It was too dangerous to even think like this. It would never work in the first place. Even if he thought it could, even if his kiss said it could. That together they would have each other's backs until the end. It was hope in the darkest shadow that had recently taken over both their lives. Caroline dragged herself up into her bed, grabbing a pillow and pulled it to her side as she curled up fighting so hard to push the feeling from her being.

Tyler made a mistake. We all do. You don't hate him for it…

"T-Tyler…" Her voice caught harshly in her throat as his name came up in a sob. She wanted Tyler. She wanted to talk to him, to smack him for leaving, to kiss him until they couldn't breathe anymore, to tell him she was so sorry for what she said to him. He would have been here with her, for her. It was their normalcy now… or at least it was, even if he believed she didn't feel the same for him. She couldn't even show that side of her to Matt, too afraid he might judge her for her actions, for not being mature enough. To take that moment and just scream and yell and just; and just live in the moment until you can't think anymore. The numb spot for Matt was swallowed by the ache that was setting into every inch of her being. Made her hurt everywhere, until she buried her face into the pillow and screamed. Screamed until she couldn't anymore… but still left her hollow. One thought resounded in her head until she fell asleep.

Tyler is gone. Tyler is gone. Tyler is gone.

– – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – –

Caroline woke the next morning just knowing today was a day to stay inside. She knew she would never be able to work up to her usually perkiness, and that would cause questions to be asked; questions she didn't want to even think about answering. Tomorrow was another day; she needed to recover from her rough night. Blood helped her a little, and by the time she came around to the front of the house, the sun was streaming brightly through all the front windows, only the kitchen was left in dimmed shadows. As she yawned and stretched, she caught movement right outside her front door. The figure was clearly male, and for some reason it put her entirely on alert. She inched closer to the door, but still couldn't make out who it was. She bit her bottom lip and breathed deep. It couldn't be?

"Caroline." Matt's voice rang out from behind the door, and Caroline nearly choked on air. Throwing the door open she half expected to see Matt looking at her like a puppy dog. Instead he stood before tall and rigid, like it took all of his being just to get himself to her house. She frowned a little.

"Matt? What are you doing here?" Her mind suddenly felt like it was wheeling out of control. He wasn't happy so what was he doing here? She took a quick glance at his hands for any possible weapon… stakes and felt foolish for it. Like Matt would stake her on her own front porch? But still, his demeanor wasn't himself. Finding out about this secret usually does that to a person. Her head still ached a little from the night before, and she wasn't feeling up for this confrontation however.

"You're going to tell me why you killed my sister." His flat tone almost scared her, but she had to remind herself she was the more superior creature here. Still thinking the same old thing about her; did he really stay away for days just so he could ask her the same question he had harassed her with last time? Caroline could feel her patience threading quickly. She stepped out onto the porch and resisted the urge to tap her foot on the deck.

"Even if I told you what had happened you wouldn't believe me. So why exactly should I tell you anything in the first place?" She snipped back, and it seemed to catch him off guard, like he was expecting something else entirely to come out of her mouth. She held in a smirk and for a split second told herself that Tyler really had worn off on her.

"So you're admitting that you killed her!" Matt gritted out and Caroline felt the last string slip. She growled at him and Matt took a small step back in surprise.

"How many times do I have to tell you; I didn't touch your precious sister, and if you can't get that through your head, then you never really understood just who I am." She hadn't meant the words to come out so literally, but Matt didn't seem to hear them. He was angry again, only he didn't seem to get it. He couldn't actually do any harm to her.

"I hate you." The words came almost like a slap across her face. In fact she probably would have felt better if he had slapped her. It stung, but oddly enough didn't surprise her. She felt her face starting to shift, the call of his blood was getting stronger the madder she got.

"Go home Matt." The words were simple. No compulsion, just a simple order as if she was still human. However Matt wasn't listening. For all her vampire speed, she suddenly felt everything go into slow motion. She turned to step back into the house. Matt grabbed her hand, her fingers and attempted to yank her back to face him. She growled and pulled her fingers sharply from his grasp, her fangs wanting to sink into his neck so badly she could taste it. And then the pain hit. Worse than vervain hitting her skin, or wooden bullets shot through her being. Her entire form was fire. She screamed and felt her legs buckle from the pain. Her back hit the porch and she tried to grasp at straws at what was happening to her. Her skin was going to burn off…

The ring!

In her attempt to free her hand from Matt's, her ring had slid off and now lay in the palm of his hand. She couldn't see his face; she couldn't do much more than scream really. Caroline had no idea how long she would have before the sun would just set her on fire, or did it even really do that? Would it be slow and agonizing like this? God she hoped not. She didn't want her mother to come how to find her daughter's corpse fried by a few rays of light. She could barely feel the lip of the doorway before it became too hard to move. In her head she could still hear herself screaming (she could have swore several times she was crying out for Tyler), but even that feeling was becoming distant. She couldn't move anymore. She let herself go, felt herself drift into nothing.

– – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – –

"Caroline—drink."

I don't want to.

"I'm not giving you a choice, you need to drink."

Bugger off loud mouth.

"I won't tell you again."

And what are you gonna do? Kill me? Sorry buddy been there done that!

"Stop being such a controlling little bitchy twit and bite me!"

Fuck off you… you voice! I won't bite anyone ever again, I'm dying… aren't I?

"Seriously stop being a bitch!"

Stop telling me what to do and I will!

"You don't get a choice…"

– – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – –

Caroline groaned as she rolled over on her bed. The sheets on her bed were scratchy and irritating her skin. She sat up slowly, feeling overly too hot to be normal. Glancing outside she frowned a little at the darkness outside her window. A dream? Well it certainly felt real enough. She glanced down at her hand to see the ring as though it had never been removed. But her body still throbbed everywhere, and her mouth held a metallic taste to it. Blood! Her mind started to panic. Did she kill someone? Someone who might have just been trying to help her? Or did Stefan find her burning alive on her porch and dragged her inside? She groaned and dropped her head into her sensitive hands and hissed at the slight pain it still caused.

"Oh my god—stupid, stupid, stupid!" She whimpered softly feeling tears build up behind her eyes. She sniffed as she felt another wave of crying building in her chest. This was way too much for her to handle right now, if nothing else Matt now knew about the ring… wait if the ring was on her finger—where was Matt? Did she… did she kill him? Her stomach dropped at the thought of it.

"Caroline?" She could barely hear the voice on the other side of the room. Her mind was going into freak out mode. She killed Matt?

"Caroline!" No this wasn't happening; she didn't want to hurt him. She just wanted him to leave her alone—to understand that she hadn't done anything to cause him pain, and then she went off and killed him! The bloody taste in her mouth didn't taste like him though…? It tasted even better, but she didn't crave it. It was just... good. Then who?

"Caroline stop ignoring me!" A hand landed on her shoulder, and even though she felt way too weak, she was still stronger than the average person. As she moved to whirl around, the figure grabbed her free arm and flipped her onto her back on the floor and instantly she was covered by a body, pinning her down. Tyler's scent filled her nose the moment he pressed his body down on top of hers to keep her from moving. Her eyes widened a little as she stared up at him, panting slightly from the small exertion. She couldn't make out the expression on his face though. He looked pissed off, but somehow withdrawn—cut off from her.

"Are you paying attention now?" He asked after a moment in a gruff unfriendly voice. Caroline managed a small nod and Tyler raised his body off her a little, but didn't move completely off her as though… He doesn't trust me. The thought twisted up her insides and she felt sicker than she did before. But she needed to clear things up before she pushed that subject with him, because he was clearly preparing for it.

"Where's Matt?" She asked in a small voice. Tyler laughed harshly and shook his head before pushing himself off her completely to stand up and moved across the room to her window.

"He just stands there watching you burn and you're worried about him?"

"No! I just…" Caroline winced as she pushed herself up on her elbows weakly, staring at Tyler as he watched the street from her window. Was he ready to bolt? Leave again? "I just—I can't kill anyone else." It was a lame answer and they both knew it.

"He got away with a broken nose. He's lucky enough." Something told her that Matt didn't even see it coming, but Tyler must have been getting better at controlling his anger. Though from her spot on the floor he looked angry enough to tear something apart. He threw the window open to her room and her heart seized her chest.

"You pulled me into the house?" That should have been obvious, but she needed to know for some reason.

You just want to know he still cares…

"Of course I did." He snapped at her and she flinched and looked away from him to the floor. Tyler sighed, but didn't move from the open window. "I thought I was too late… you—" He stopped talking and ran his fingers through his hair. "It was nearly hell to get you to bite me."

"I bit you?" She screeched, her voice breaking in sheer terror. It wasn't a dream, his voice then? Caroline tried to sit up a little more on the floor but her body refused to let her up. But she had to get up, make sure she hadn't done any damage to him. God what if the bite from a vampire was just as lethal to a werewolf too?

"Calm down Care, breathe." Tyler hissed, and she realized her face had started to shift. But it wasn't the blood lust that was driving her to change. It was worry...

"Are you okay?" She breathed in deep and for some reason Tyler growled at her.

"Now you care? Check on Matt first even though he caused this in the first place?" He snapped again, turning to the window and throwing his legs out ready to drop down. Caroline felt her lungs close up on her; but no sound would come out of her mouth. She pushed her body a little more trying to get to her feet, but her body just gave out beneath her. He was going to just leave again?

NO! Tyler no please! Please, please, please!

Tyler moved so fast he disappeared from her view, and she felt her eyes water up again. Gone? The word echoed in her chest.

He hates you…

Caroline rolled over onto her stomach and pressed her face into her hands. Since when did she get so weak over a boy? Not even Matt caused her this much distress since he broke up with her. The thought that he hated her—maybe he should have just let her burn. Maybe she should just let the blood block her feelings.

"I don't hate you." Tyler muttered above her, dropping something into her chair in the corner before he leaned down to pick her up far more gently than she would have even expected from him. Instead of lying her down on the bed, he sat down on it with his back against the backboard and kept her cradled in his arms. His face however was still somewhat withdrawn from her and it took her a moment to realize that he may not hate her, but he really didn't trust her. She took a moment to breathe in deep, and she knew anything she said now would affect everything. It would be these next few minutes that would let him start to trust her again, or break them forever.

"I'm so sorry!" Tyler blinked at her and started to open his mouth but she shoved her hand over it. "I didn't mean what I said before you left. I was… I was just so angry and scared and hurt, I didn't know how to take anything. I—I'm so sorry Tyler that I had to lie to you. I didn't want you to hurt anymore than you already were and I just wanted to justify a reason to be mad to deal with all of it. And…" Tyler grabbed her hand and dragged it from his mouth.

"I can't forgive you." Caroline nearly choked up at his interruption. "Why couldn't you just let me be there for you Care? Why no faith that I could take care of you too? I was just so confused. You told me I wanted no one to care about me? What about you? You pushed me away, lied to me, and I got so caught up I couldn't even think anymore!" Tyler was a little red faced at his rant and Caroline stared down at the collar of his shirt. She wasn't quite sure if he was telling her the truth about not hating her. It certainly sounded like it.

I was afraid.

"Of what?" He sounded calm this time. Caroline sighed and started to open her mouth before she stopped. She hadn't said that out loud. Her eyes shot back up to his and he suddenly had the gall to look away uncomfortably. Now that she thought about it, she never said that he hated her out loud either.

"I didn't say that out loud… did I?" Tyler grunted, but she didn't need much more of an answer than that. Before she could open her mouth again, he cut her off.

"I can't forgive you because I already did that Care. I… heard you last night. Saying my name." Was it just her, or did Tyler sound almost shy? He heard her?

"You were outside my window?" She squeaked a little in horror but he just smirked at her in the way that made her heart miss a beat. Damn it was more potent after not seeing it in so long…

"No I was a couple miles outside of town. I've been debating for a few weeks now on coming back, but" He glanced at her before he sighed like he was like he was giving away some kind of big secret she wasn't supposed to know. "I heard you say my name… I don't know inside me. All—broken." She sighed. Broken, that sounded about right to her. Tyler couldn't look her in the eye anymore and she bit down on her bottom lip for a moment.

"You love me jerk." It was a simple statement, but she knew the feeling behind it when she said it. It somehow connected her to him. Tyler could feel her and as terrified as that made her in that moment, she never felt more comfortable, more safe. Tyler frowned and snapped back at her.

"So what? Is that such a bad thing? You love me too bitch!" Caroline starred at him a moment before she felt it bubbling up inside her. He sounded so offended, but she knew that wasn't it at all. It started off small, but soon she was giggling in his lap nearly full force. It would figure that this is how they would profess something between them. With words just flying out, sounding like daggers but falling so short.

Tyler glare softened staring at her after moment as her giggles persisted. She just nodded her head at his words. Tyler smirked at her again and used his free from her waist to pull her face to his; kissing so softly she almost thought he was afraid she would push him again. She had to insist on pressing her lips more firmly to his.

There was still so much more to figure out. Klaus still had to be dealt with, and probably even more werewolf problems to put up with. Katherine still had her ass out of that tomb too. And she still had to fill him in on everything that was happening, and deal with the rest of the gang's reaction to Tyler's reappearance. Damon was most certainly not going to be thrilled.

But so long as Tyler was with her she was sure they would handle it. Together or die trying.

– – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – –

So I'm sorry to all the Matt fans, I've never been fond of him really, so I hope I didn't offend anyone. If I continue with more random one-shots to this I can pretty much guarantee he won't exactly be friendly in the future either. But on a high note, if I get enough reviews I will continue to post more one-shots of Forwood! Some related to this one, some not. I have some ideas, so if you want me to continue, all you gotta do is hit that nice little review button! Pretty please~! I might even post a link in the future when I finish my Forwood video .

~Bella Rose

Disclaimer: All publicly recognizable characters, settings, etc. are the property of their respective owners. The original characters and plot are the property of the author. The author is in no way associated with the owners, creators, or producers of any media franchise. No copyright infringement is intended.