12

Adrian had never been a good boy, since the beginning of time he was getting everything he wanted. Being one of those rich spoiled children of royal Moroi and the Queen's favorite nephew he got used to do everything he'd taken into his head. It was like that since he was a child and was meant to stay like that until the very death of him, but something happened. Rose Hathaway happened.

When he saw her in that snowy hotel for the first time he immediately started to want her. She was the most beautiful woman he'd ever met in his entire life, even despite a huge bruise on her cheekbone. She was all glowing with force and self-confidence though he saw lots of black spots in her aura that was going to absorb the girl.

From their first meeting he felt like a lion on the chase, he needed her, and there was no way to escape her deadly look. He just couldn't put her out of his head. But unfortunately, or maybe fortunately, she wasn't a prey.

She said him 'no'. For the first time a girl refused his offer, and Adrian Ivashkov wasn't used to such an attitude. Some would've backed off, but it wasn't in his nature to give up, and he especially wasn't going to give up on her. Adrian wanted Rose Hathaway and was drawn to her like a butterfly to the fire.

And she was a fire, murderous and tempting. He had heard of her before - a rebellious novice, daughter of Janine Hathaway and Princess Dragomir's best friend and potential Guardian. She was a challenge and he accepted, believing that no girl could escape his charm and his seducing skill. Though he didn't know that she wasn't going pay attention on him and his desires, but when he saw how her aura flashed when that Belikov guy came on the scene Adrian understood that her heart was taken, and it was the moment when for the first time in his life he started wanting not only girl's marvelous body, but her soul, he wanted her heart to belong him.

Since that night when he visited her dream and pissed her off, he knew that in the chase he was earlier imagining himself being a predator, he was just a victim of Rose Hathaway's never stopping hell of a life. She was always fighting for something, no matter was it a battle with Strigoi for living or her classmates for being treated as a personality and as a blood whore they were claiming she was.

Adrian didn't like those rumors, he hated the thought of Rose being hurt, and though he knew she didn't need his help or his protection he couldn't help but think about defending her reputation. Moreover he hated himself for the daydreams he had of her, maybe Adrian didn't want anyone call Rose a blood whore just because he wanted to taste her blood himself? Because he wanted it to be their secret, their private act of love and he would've never revealed the fact of her giving him her blood if it was real, and not just because he wanted to protect her, but because it would've been like showing everyone their sex tape.

Thank goodness there was Vasilissa, Rose's best friend, who had something to make his mind occupied. He'd never known there was someone like him, he'd never thought of himself as a dullard, though he couldn't help but wonder why he had no specialization at all. And Vasilissa had the answer, he had a specialization, and it was Spirit that gave Adrian the power to walk into other people's dreams.

It was nice to finally have someone who understood him and with whom he could share his feelings. Though she disapproved his drinking and smoking habits Vasilissa didn't blame him as she felt the same darkness inside and understood that for him it was the only way to deal with the consequences of Spirit using. She had Rose bonded to he, who took most of the darkness away and he felt jealous of this kind bonding.

Adrian wished deep inside that he also had someone to make it easier, and he would've been the happiest man alive if it was Rose. He couldn't help but smile at the thought of what would've Russian felt if Adrian was the one whose feelings Rose would've felt. It was clear for him that since that night in her dream he was stuck with her, not willing to break free. And he didn't actually want to.

When Rose was kidnapped with those morons, Adrian's heart was ready to explode; he himself was ready to use all his Spirit powers to find her, to save her life, even by the sacrifice of his own. He couldn't bear the thought of losing Rose without actually having a chance to win he heart; he couldn't lose her when she wasn't even his yet.

Every second he was checking up on her if she was asleep to tell him when Strigoi kept her. He didn't give a damn on her crappy friends who got her involved in their Strigoi search and kill game. Did they seriously think that they were able to do that all by themselves? They had no idea how scary Strigoi were, how strong and fast they were. They were sure that they would handle the situation, find a bunch of Strigoi and successfully kill them. Arrogant idiots!

And when she came to him to ask for money, he could help but wonder what he did to be cursed this way. He couldn't say 'no', he was ready to do everything she asked for. Ever if she said to cut his heart out he would've done that without thinking. Love's really a bitch.

Since that first time in the mountains, for the last six years it was all about her. Every second since they broke off he missed her though for the first time even love faded because of all the hatred and offend. Adrian wanted her back like nothing else in this world, but his pride was rejecting the idea of even thinking about that. So he pushed himself in those relationships with Sidney, knowing from the very beginning that there was no future hem. He had no future with anyone until Rose was the only woman he could love and imagine himself with.

Those weren't the feelings that could be easily withdrawn.

He still had a connection with her, still was trying to get as close as possible to stay unnoticed and safe from her fluids. Adrian found comfort in the hope that if he would be close and see how happy she is with Dimitri and do whatever he wants to do in front of her one day he would be able to forget about Rose Hathaway. But he had never managed to follow his own plan.

He was so hurt when she said she wanted to stay with Belikov, he left her trying to hurt her with word as much as she did with her choice, though from the beginning Adrian knew that if there was any chance for her to be with Dimitri she would leave for him in an instance. And the thought of that always was in the back of his mind, torturing him.

And now it was all over. Belikov was gone and Adrian felt relieved though he couldn't let himself be happy with that fact when Rose was such a mess. Dimitri was her world, he light in the darkness and now it was gone, and Adrian understood that that wasn't something she would outlive quickly and easily.

It was few days after the funeral; they were driving to Omsk to fly back to States. Rose was looking blindly through the window of the car. She said nothing since she returned from the house full of Strigoi with a bleeding head of one of them. Noone blamed her though. One of Adrian's hands held Rose's palm to warm it, to make her feel real as for those few days she ate, slept and nothing more, she didn't lived, she just existed as a shadow. Obviously, a need for revenge was the last thing that kept her from going all insane.

Adrian felt sick seeing her being that way, he was ready to do anything to make her feel better and he knew that there was no such thing. They all should've just waited, should've gave her time to accept, time to realize that since now she had to learn how to live without him.

And Adrian wanted badly to teach her, though he was sure he would never do a first step until she would be ready. He wanted her and missed the feeling of her lips on his lips, he missed her terribly, but Adrian could do nothing, and the thought of standing apart was killing him. Keeping away from Rose was unbearable; it kept him from sleep the night they arrived in the Court. Adrian tossed and turned and tried to think of something else, but couldn't put the thought of Rose being hurt aside.

One of the side effects of the ability he had due to the power of Spirit, Adrian wasn't able to watch his own dreams. Since the first time he created a dream for his first girlfriend, he hadn't seen one. It was almost sixteen years, but he still couldn't forget the wonderful feeling of remembering the dream you'd just had. He used to imagine that some events in his life were dreams, good or bad, but stopped when he realized that there was no point in thinking so as the words were sad and the deeds were done. But what happened next was like a dream, it couldn't be real.

His eyes were wide open when the door opened and she came in, only covered in a blanket. Adrian had already seen her naked and he knew how beautiful she was, but he definitely didn't expect Rose to visit him at night that way. She was silent and he couldn't take his eyes from her. Rose paused right next to his bed looking at him with some kind of half smile half painful grimace; nevertheless she was amazingly beautiful, like an angel in that shining white blanket.

It was dark in the room because of the thick curtains, but he saw perfectly how that blanket slid down leaving Rose not only naked, but absolutely unprotected. He saw it in her eyes, though she came and wanted to do what she did, she wasn't really ready for what it offers her – freedom or another opportunity to lock her up.

Adrian saw disbelief in her face and suddenly felt an urge to push her as closer to him as possible, but he stayed motionless. Their eyes met and Rose believed what he could offer, what he was ready and willing to give her. She believed that she was able to try to do the same.

Rose slipped under the covers and the sense of her hot skin against his, much colder one, made him tense. She lifted her eyes as if she thought he wanted her to go away, but he just sent her a mental note, that she received feeling like she hadn't felt in a long time – peaceful.

Adrian finally fell asleep counting her heart beats.