These are going to be my obligatory smutty one-shots surrounding mostly Booth and Bones. There may be other characters thrown in every once in a while, but let's just start with the ones that most everyone wants to see get together.

These are going to be mostly pure smut, not much if any plot involved. They will all be unrelated unless I say so, but they will all have the common theme of food. So, food will always be involved in one way. Yes, that'll probably include pie in at least one.

But we're going to start with Nutella, simply because I love the stuff.

I'm not sure how often I'll post to this series as I do have two other multi-chapter fics going on right now, as well as a multi-chapter fic that has been on hiatus since September that I hope to get going again eventually.

Also, if you've read my other stuff, you know I have a tendency to make chapters four to six thousand words long. I'm going to try to keep these shorter and more to the point.

Nutella

Seeley Booth was sitting in front of his television watching the Flyers get the shit beat out of them by the Stars. He'd had enough of watching the massacre so he shut it off muttering a few choice expletives and walked to the kitchen. He'd already had dinner, but found that he was hungry.

He didn't have very much food in his apartment considering he ate out a lot because his job always had him on the go around meal times, and because it was one of the only ways to make sure that his stubborn partner, Temperance Brennan, ate at a decent time, if at all. They had dinner at one of her favorite vegetarian restaurants leaving Booth wondering why anyone would willingly eat eggplant and whatever that smashed up orange shit was. It was no wonder he was still hungry after that.

He'd eaten there for her, though, because it was her turn to pick the restaurant. They'd been formally seeing each other for two months. When they first started going out, he'd told her that she could pick one night each week to eat vegetarian meals when it was her turn to choose the restaurant. One night a week wouldn't kill him, but it sure left him hungry two hours later each time.

Tonight she would have come back to his apartment with him, but Cam had called her back to the lab to finish something. Booth didn't know what time to expect her to drop by.

As he searched his kitchen for food, he grew increasingly frustrated as he noticed that he didn't even have peanut butter for a peanut butter and jelly sandwich. All that was there was a jar of his girlfriend's Nutella that she kept there for late night snacks while working on paperwork. He'd tried it a few times and was actually quite impressed with the taste. He grabbed the jar and walked over to the antique bread box that belonged to his Gram.

No bread. Great.

He narrowed his eyes at the jar. He really liked the stuff and now that he had on his mind that he was going to eat it only to find no bread, he got an idea. He walked over to a drawer and pulled out a big spoon.

He dipped the spoon in and pulled out a heaping glob of the sweet creamy goodness. He stood there licking the spoon, making sure to not leave any traces on the spoon before dipping more out.

"Booth!" He heard from the door to the kitchen, "What are you doing?"

Booth stood frozen with the spoon in his mouth and the jar in his hand. Busted.

"Is that my…Booth, that's disgusting! That jar belongs to you now, and you owe me another one."

"I, uh, I got hungry," he shrugged.

"I see; we already had dinner."

"Correction, you had dinner. I'm not sure what I had, but my stomach is telling me that it's still hungry."

"Well, do you have to be so barbaric? Couldn't you at least put in on some bread?"

She was pissed. Damn, he loved it when she was fiery like this.

"There was no bread. I didn't see anything else that I wanted. Besides, I do this with my peanut butter all the time."

"Which is why I have my own jar of Nutella here. So that I won't have to use something you've contaminated!"

"What? I'm not sick!"

"Germs, Booth."

"We swap spit all the time, Bones! And I thought you were supposed to be at the lab working on something."

"I was, but I got done quicker than I thought I would."

"And since when do you sneak in like a damn silent ninja anyway. You are one of the noisiest people I know."

"Thanks," she replied with oozing sarcasm. She couldn't pick up on such subtleties very well, but boy could she dish them.

She walked the rest of the way over to him from the door of the kitchen. She took the jar from him and looked into it and rolled her eyes at him. She set it on the counter and turned to walk to his fridge to get a beer.

Booth tugged on her arm and pulled her back over. He stuck a finger in the jar and slathered his finger in a good amount of Nutella. He held his finger out and looking right in her eyes, he ran his Nutella covered finger over her bottom lip to her jaw and on her neck.

She was outraged until his hot mouth found the end of the trail of Nutella on her neck. HE sucked and licked it off, ending at her bottom lip, where his mouth seized hers. He sucked on her lip and she opened her mouth in invitation, causing her to taste the remnants of the Nutella.

He was trying to divert her attention from the fact that he had been caught eating out of the jar, and she knew the second that he smeared the creamy substance on her lip that the anger and repulsion at his act was a lost argument. Damn him and his so-good-it-should-be illegal sex appeal.

They worked each other out of their shirts and Booth removed Brennan's bra as the kiss grew more heated and out of control.

Booth pulled away and smirked at her. "Is that a better way to eat it?"

Brennan's response was to grab the jar off the counter, "I think I need more information before I make that conclusion," she said as she scooped some up on a few of her fingers, knowing that the squinty talk would fuel his passion for her.

She smeared the large glob of Nutella between her two hands and then rubbed it on Booth's bare chest. She licked her fingers. "Hm, tasted better from your lips that it does from my fingers. Let's see how it tastes from…" She trailed off as she brought her lips to his right pectoral muscle. She hummed her approval. "Mmm, just as I suspected. Unbelievably good," She murmured into his chest. She swirled her tongue around his nipple and rubbed her still Nutella covered hands up and down the planes of his back.

Booth ran his fingers through her hair lightly holding and guiding her, but making sure she didn't feel forced to stay there. With his other hand, he grabbed the jar again and got another generous helping of Nutella. After Brennan trailed her lips back up to Booth's mouth for another kiss. Booth rubbed some over her ample breasts, making sure to put the excess amounts over the nipples.

"This may just be better than apple pie," he growled into her chest starting in the crevice between. Brennan grabbed his head and tugged on his short hair as his hot mouth worked over to her left breast, hungrily lapping up the tasty treat and then giving the other breast the same treatment.

"Oh god, Booth," she cried, "I need you. Now, please."

"So polite, Doctor Brennan." Booth said, beginning to work her skinny jeans off her hips as he finished cleaning the Nutella off of her right breast with his mouth.

"You've taught me the proper etiquette for many social occasions, Agent Booth." Brennan tugged the drawstring of his sweatpants, untying it and she hooked her fingers in the waistbands of his pants and his boxers, taking them both down his narrow hips. She bent back up toward his straining erection.

She smeared a small dollop on the head of his penis before sucking it off. She hummed, bringing a tingling sensation to the pit of his stomach. He slipped from her mouth with a satisfying pop, "just when I thought it couldn't get any better."

"I can think of something a little better, but you gotta come back up here, first." She stood up the rest of the way and tugged him to her claiming his lips once more with hers as he backed her into the refrigerator.

He hitched her up with her legs wrapped around his back and her arms up around his neck. He held both hands beneath her bottom as he slid into her hot core. Brennan sighed as Booth entered her and Booth hissed as he was sheathed tightly into her.

If either one of them wanted slow and sensual, neither said anything. They both knew that was not going to happen this time. He started moving after a pausing briefly to make sure she was ready and adjusted her so that he wouldn't drop her. Faster and faster he moved pounding her into the door of the refrigerator. The sounds of the contents of the refrigerator shaking and the sounds of skin slapping against skin and shrieks, grunts and wails of pleasure filled the apartment as they echoed off the walls and the hardwood floors.

His breathing was getting labored and he could feel himself starting to cave. He kept one hand on her rear and kept her braced against the refrigerator as he brought his other one around to rub tight circles on her sensitive bundle of nerves. Her shaky breaths became more frequent and shallow as she squirmed around him to help herself fall.

Brennan's vision nearly went black as her waves of pleasure ran through her at full force. Booth followed very quickly after; he lengthened inside of her as her tremors within her body milked his orgasm from him. He tried to keep them both standing as he moved gently to bring the both down.

Finally, he could no longer hold their combined weight, much less his own, and they fell into a sweaty sticky heap of skin and limbs onto the floor up against the refrigerator. Booth leaned up against the door and brought her around to lean up against his sticky chest.

"Way better than apple pie," Booth said after licking a small amount off of her cheek.

Need a cigarette? I do. Haha.

I'm taking suggestions for food ideas.

See you dirty minded lovelies later.

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XOXO,
CrayonClown