Trust Me

By

Hannio

Disclaimer – None of the characters mentioned in the below piece of work belong to me in any fashion. I'm merely using them for my own entertainment.

Author Note – Another little one shot between Leo and Raph. I'm not sure where this came from or why it evolved the way it did but hey a story is a story right! I hope you enjoy it

Raphael sighed out loud as he tilted his face towards the sky. It had been one of those weeks for him where everything that could go wrong had actually gone wrong for him.

He had managed to upset everyone in the household and if he was being honest with himself he had absolutely no idea how he had managed it. As far as he had been aware he had been in a good mood. He had been quieter then usual; keeping his usual hot temper under firm control and yet it still hadn't done him any good. As far as he could tell his brothers were ignoring him. Certainly none of them wanted to be in the same room as him often choosing to leave when he entered and if they were together and he came in they would go silent and watch him.

He rubbed at his eyes tiredly. He really had, had enough today when he had entered the kitchen and both Michelangelo and Donatello had fallen silent and shared one of those long looks which made absolutely no sense to him before they both had gotten to their feet clearly planning on vacating the room. He had snapped at them not to bother and had stormed out of the lair, ignoring Leonardo as he called after him.

He hadn't been aware on where he was going but this roof top; overlooking the city had seemed as good a place as any for him to brood. He was seated against the wall, the sun was hidden behind one of the large skyscrapers but he could tell from the darkening sky that night fall was creeping over New York. He had assumed he had been out there for a few hours and yet he felt no desire to return home, not back to the atmosphere anyway. At least up here, he didn't feel like he was in the way of people.

He shifted slightly, dragging his knees up towards his chest so he could rest his chin on them as he wrapped his arms around them. He wished things would go back to the way they were. When everything had been normal and his brothers had seemingly enjoyed his company instead of treating him like he had the plague.

He shook his head as he bit the inside of his lip. What could he possibly have done to them that would make them act the way they were. The more he thought about it the more he couldn't think of any reason and the more frustrated he got, with them and himself. There had to be a reason, there just had to be.

"Hey, I've been looking for you" Raphael stilled, turning his head on his knees and looking up to see Leonardo standing before him. His usual calm look plastered on his face.

"Talking to me now?" he demanded with a slight laugh. "Best step away Leo, wouldn't want you catching the plague from me or something." he turned away, his gaze fixed forward, back to where he had been gazing before. He could see Leonardo linger next to him, clearly trying to decide what the best move in this situation would be. The situation would almost make him smile if it didn't make him so angry.

"Budge up."

"Is that a command or a request fearless?" Raphael asked him, eyes still focused forward.

"It's a request from your big brother" came the quiet reply. Raphael stilled for a moment before he huffed out loud, shifting along leaving the spot next to him free.

"Park it then" Raphael said roughly. Leonardo sat next to him and leaned back against the wall, his legs spread out in front of him, crossed at the ankle.

"How do you always manage to find the best spots to see the city from?" Leonardo asked casually. Raphael turned his face towards him raising an eye ridge at him. Clearly Leonardo wasn't going to follow his normal way of talking to him.

"I spend a lot of time up here Leo, you get to see and find things if you do" he commented shortly. "What do you want and how did you find me?" he demanded, his eyes narrowing suspiciously. Leonardo fiddled with his belt, pulling out his shell cell.

"You left this on" he answered calmly. "So Donnie tracked you here. He was worried about you, we all were" Raphael's face became a mixture of rage and sad acceptance.

"Worried about me" he responded with another bitter laugh that made Leonardo look at him sharply. "The 3 of you have treated me like a leper for the past week Leo. Don't think I'm that stupid that I haven't noticed. You all fall silent the minute I walk into a room, you prefer to leave the room then stay in there if I'm about. Hell Leo the only person who's treated me normal is Dad. I've been meditating every night with him just to get some contact with someone who isn't treating me like I'm diseased and then you have the nerve to follow me up here and claim the 3 of you are worried about me. If that's your way of showing worry then thanks but no thanks. I ain't interested." Raphael turned away, hunching down further.

There was a long silence after he spoken and if Raphael hadn't been aware that Leonardo was still sitting next to him then he would have assumed that he had already gone.

"I'm sorry Raph" Leonardo said quietly, regret flavouring his voice.

"Sometimes sorry doesn't cut it Leo." He said, the rage gone from his voice leaving only quiet acceptance. "I get it I really do; you guys don't want me around. That's your own choice. I'll keep out of your way and you keep out of mine. Some routine will occur I'm sure which means we won't have to see each other except for practice."

"Not want you around" Leonardo stated. "How could you think we don't want you around?" Raphael turned and gave Leonardo a pointed disbelieving look. "Jesus Raph why do you always have to think the worse of us?" He asked in despair.

"What do you expect me to think Leo?" Raphael asked in equal despair. "Do you have any idea what its like to feel like a stranger in your own home?"

"Yes I do Raph" Leonardo responded angrily. "When I came back from Central America and you all had this life that didn't include me and I had to force myself back into the group and make you accept me again. How did you think I felt? Knowing that deep down you and Mikey had accepted Donnie's leadership so easily. It was like I didn't exist." Raphael surged to his feet ignoring Leonardo's startled expression. He turned round and jabbed a finger at him.

"You don't deserve a pity party" he hissed. "You were meant to be gone for 6 months, 6 stupid long months and you never came back and you never sent word and it took April of all people for you to return home. Where were you oh great leader. You know fuck you and fuck the other 2 as well. I hope the 3 of you are all very happy together." he turned away angry as he felt tears well up in his eyes.

He took a few steps away before Leonardo rugby tackled him, his hand finding Raphael's pressure point freezing him into place. Leonardo knelt by him looking down at him with a sad expression on his face.

"I'm sorry I had to do that to you but I didn't know how else to stop you running off. You won't listen to me normally but perhaps you'll listen to me now." he sighed "I'm sorry I hurt you so much Raph. I know from Donnie that you took my leaving the hardest. I should have realised you would but there was something about being there, out in the jungle that made everything that was important somehow feel too far away to think of." Raphael wished he could move but he felt helpless so instead he glared up at Leonardo.

"I never wanted to leave you all in the first place. You weren't there so you didn't hear me yelling at Master Splinter at the thought of going but he got his way in the end and I left, but don't ever think that there was one day that passed and I didn't think of you and the other 2 and wish that I was with you. I missed the 3 of you so much that I buried myself out there in the jungle. Buried the hurt and tried to lose myself so I didn't have to think. Think about you all and what was happening to you while I wasn't there to look after you all. I'm the eldest it's my job to do it but all I felt like was I failed and the more time I spent out there the more I felt like I had. I'm not making excuses but…" he stopped and sighed shaking his head

"I'm going to release you now." His hand found the pressure point and released allowing Raphael to slump down though he made no movement to push Leonardo off of him.

"You should have written to us" he said quietly, all rage and anger gone from his voice "Everything felt wrong without you there, it felt like we were drowning." Leonardo stilled for a moment before he smiled.

"I can't change the past Raph but I can promise you that I am never leaving any of you willingly again ok?" Raphael opened his mouth to disagree before he closed it, taking in the look in Leonardo's eyes. Instead he nodded and offered him a slight smile. Leonardo smiled back down at him and stood up offering Raphael his hand. After a moment's hesitation Raphael took it and allowed Leonardo to pull him up.

"I'm heading back now" Leonardo commented softly. "Are you coming with me" Raphael lifted the back of his hand up to his neck and rubbed it looking awkward "Look Raph I promise you that none of us are ignoring you and if you think about it then you'll realise why we are. I can't tell you though because it's a surprise but you'll find out why next week. Just trust me again." Raphael frowned before shrugging

"Whatever fearless, if you say it's nothing then its nothing. Let's go" he said. He glanced once more around him before following Leonardo feeling reassured despite himself.

Author note – It's been a while since I wrote a semi angst story so it felt like a nice change especially as all my one shots have been quite fluffy recently. Anyway I hope you like it enough to review and if you want to know the reason why they were going quiet ect is because it was Raph's birthday the next week and they were planning a surprise party but Raph being typical Raph has forgotten his own birthday lol!

I might write another piece actually doing his birthday but I'm not sure yet. We shall have to see.

Please review and I hope you enjoyed it!